More on this book
Community
Kindle Notes & Highlights
In a hundred and fifty years, Haussman will set his mark upon the city, raise a uniform facade and paint the buildings in the same pale palette, creating a testament to art, and evenness, and beauty.
Why should the reader care
Henry Strauss has never been a morning person.
Fantastic char trait. Note sarcasm
whether she eats with him or not, that even if she stays here in this room, her mind will follow him down the stairs to dinner.
Unnecessary exp. Just say she is hungry. You've established that food is hard to come by when it involves people. Lean on your setup.
He is, after all, a wild thing, a god of forest nights, a demon bounded by the dark, and yet he sits with the poise and grace of a nobleman enjoying his dinner.
I see what she's going for, almost theatrical in "poetry". But her tone doesn't match the context and plot. It comes off annoyingly condescending. Addie just seems like she has no character.
Instead she focuses first on the soup, and then on fish, and then on a round of pastry-crusted beef. It is more than she has eaten in months, in years, and she feels full in a way that goes beyond her stomach.
The author writes this scene as if it should have meaning but she has failed to even bond the reader to Addie so why the fuck would i think this scene means anything to the plot?
By the end of dinner, they will be another shade entirely.
If you want to build tension, don't foreshadow within the same scene.
She resists the urge to fling the crystal at him, knowing it will do no good.
Weird phrasing. What will do no good? Flinging the crystal or resisting the urge? Come on, Editors, you really messed up on this book.
Addie sees herself beside him in the bed, the space cold between their bodies, sees herself bent over the hearth the way her mother always was, the same frown lines, too, fingers aching too much to stitch the tears in clothes, far too much to hold her old drawing pencils; sees herself wither on the vine of life, and walk the short steps so familiar to every person in Villon, the narrow road from cradle to grave—the little church waiting, still and gray as a tombstone.
Now this is arresting because it is universally relatable
woman, not in a world where they are bound up inside their clothes, and sealed inside their homes, a world where only men are given leave to roam.
Good
There is no introduction, no formal exchange. He simply dives into the conversation, as if they have known each other for years instead of minutes.
Stop interrupting your own writing. Eliminate such narration and stating the fucking obvious
When he is with Addie, he feels alive, and it doesn’t hurt.
Statement feels unsubstantiated
“Think about it.” Henry says, “I will.” And he does.
How is this storytelling.
