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“My mother was my first country. The first place I ever lived.”
It’s not her appearance. It’s the things she said at the protest.
Metal and mettle.
The Girl Who Chases Stars is not typical circumstances. She is atypical. Unusual. File this under “won’t find another like this one.”
I bet those high school idiots have no idea how to handle her. A part of me really hopes they don’t.
“Lennix Moon Hunter.
It feels like I missed something or never had something that I’m sure would have been good.
We’ve had one conversation. Some people leave an impression. Lennix Moon Hunter has left more than an impression. She’s left her mark on me. And it’s shaped like a star.
“You know what? I might fail. I might end up broke, but I’ll be my own man. It’ll be hard, but I’m determined to
make a life for myself that has nothing to do with the Cade name.”
“I want nothing to do with you. You’re not cutting me off, Dad,” I tell him, slinging the words like stones catapulted over a wall. “I’m the one cutting you off.”
It feels like we never win, but my mother never gave up. I don’t know how she died, but I do know how she lived. She would have fought until the end. And so will I.
Some of the women start singing one of the old songs.
I’ll never forget this feeling but will call on it when I’m weary in the fight. No, I’ll never forget this feeling.
“You’ll have to let yourself feel again, Lennix. I see it, you know? That reserve you have with everyone.
I want to ask if Mama felt more special to him than the rest. I want to ask if he ever cries for her, like I still do.
Does grief hit him in the most unexpected times and hang over the day until he wants to crawl back in bed and sleep so he won’t remember she’s gone and never coming back?
Does she come to him in his dreams? Or is...
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They weren’t together for years before she died, and it makes ...
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only person on Earth still hurting thi...
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Grief is its own kind of intimacy, a bond of sorts between you a...
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And maybe it helps to know someone reaches that same level of despair. That’s wh...
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I needed her more than everyone else did.
I shake off the helplessness of done deals and irreversible things and straighten from the wall.
“I’m just not a dick-for-the-sake-of-dick girl, I don’t think.” I bury my head in the cool pillow and breathe in clean linen. “I trust myself to know when and who.”
either. Both my parents taught me to know what I believe, to articulate it first to myself and then to others.
I’ve never liked the idea of my body making decisions my head and my heart don’t cosign.
“For whatever you’re thinking when you look at me like that.”
“I thought you were the girl who chases stars.”
“What do you think I’m doing right now?”
“I’m fully prepared to take you back to the hostel, but I’d rather take you home.
I’ve been drawn to you since I first saw you on that hill with stars and stripes on your
face. You cried, and there was such conviction in every word you spoke.
I didn’t know you were seventeen, but I knew you were young. And I wondered, what made her this way? What shaped her in...
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That girl, the girl who drew me in that day, I would never expect things to be sim...
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For a moment, I’m stunned by his vision of me—of how he ...
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There are few things more affirming than someone s...
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you aspire to be—for them to say I se...
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“Not this one. There’s power in choosing your own path, and I’ve waited until I found someone I was sure I wanted to be with my first time. This is what I want, Doc. I’ve never felt more in control.”
“You’ve been honest with me, Nix. So open, and everything you’ve shared makes me respect you
even more.”
You’re exactly who I thought...
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“Since you found out that I’m a Cade,” he says. “I don’t have to hide anymore. There’s something you should know about us.”
“We get whatever the fuck we want,” he says, dropping his eyes down the length of my body. “And I want you, Lennix Moon. I want the girl who chases stars.”
“I can’t force you. I wouldn’t want you like that anyway. You want time. I can respect that. I
can’t make you give me another chance.”
“I have to leave now for this expedition, but we’re not done.”
“We’re not. Do what you need to do. Change your world,” he says softly, his eyes connected to mine so intensely there’s no hope of looking away. “I have to go make my world,
but when the time is right, I’ll be back for you.”
Her eyes and mouth pinch at the corners. That’s what I wanted—the fire I know is there, not these cold ashes she’s giving me.