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April 11 - May 16, 2025
Soon after the chipper blond was presented with her new role, no one could hear the end of her bragging until it was time to kick her ass out of the village, sword in hand.
There is no mention of learning to use the sword
Cumin tore the pillow from its casing as I sprang up, then pulled the pillowcase over my head and shot out of the room to the kitchen.
How old are pillow cases?
I guess packing a full travel carriage like a normal person was too much to ask.
Pa frantically restrung my bow no less than six times. Just to make sure it would fire right. After I fired arrows into any target he pointed at, Pa let out a breath of relief upon seeing that my aim was still true.
bows do not fire. They might shoot.
“I hold no love for rapists and thieves. If you didn’t kill them, I’m sure they would have done worse to me. Hence why I shot the last one. Hell, I think Smash killed the leader.” His head rose to look me in the eye. “You are not upset?” “No. They were rapists. Please kill rapists.”
none of this fits. This is 21st century norms projected into an utterly different society.
could just level this whole city and everyone in it on our way to the temple.
she was worried about him defeating three bandits. now he can take an entire city.
“You… can talk,” she began slowly. “And… and not just basic words either. Like rational spoken words?” “I tend to save my mindless screaming for Tuesdays,”
“I’ve unknowingly walked past fully sentient people being treated as less than animals and did nothing. If it were me at the end of a chain, I couldn’t imagine the kind of monster that would walk past me and do nothing if they knew the truth.”
This is again totally unbelievable in cultural context.
It’s rare for demons to have any children because of the harsh circumstances in the Northern continent. My parents met their end a long time ago.”
Then how come they aren't extinct?
giving in to him was a terrifying thought. As much as my body wanted him, Fallon didn’t want casual sex. He wanted forever.
Yet another remark that makes no sense in cultural context.
The fireflies in my stomach started their own jazz band as he turned his burning gaze to my core.
This is horrendously mixed metaphor. Also, how does she know about jazz?
“Who’s the third woman?” “She’s a centaur named Holly. I showed her how to prepare the ship for sail this morning, so she should be supervising that now.”
I cannot picture a centaur on a sailing ship. How does she manage the ladders?
The oars at the bottom of the vessel moved steadily, even with no one to operate them. The lower deck was filled with cabins to hold a crew with a magic tablet in the center to control the oars’ direction.
How can this work? Won't water come in?
Taking the stairs to the hold below, I looked through the row of cabins. Finally, in the last cabin on the left, I found my dragon sitting on a bed, staring out the window.
Won’t the hold be below the waterline? Why doe the hold have cabins? Does the author know what a boat is?
After no small effort, I convinced Smash to help me drag the two men out of the sand and into a grassy valley with a few trees for shade.
How far are they being dragged? How are they attached to the horse?
After sticking the fish to roast by a fire,
Where did the fire come from?
After grabbing my comb,
Where did that come from?
