June First

by Jennifer Hartmann

“I want to go slow. Adore you. Fuck you for hours, like we have all the time in the world because we do…” I grip his hair, his tongue dipping out to taste me. “We do, Junebug.” “I missed you,” I whimper. “I missed you so much.” “I’m done missing you. I’m done sleeping alone. I’m done wishing for a future with you when you’re still here.” His head falls back against the wall as I ride him, swiveling my hips and leaning forward, our lips touching. “I…” He thrusts up. “Am…” He thrusts again. “Done.” I kiss him hard, frenzied, full of passion and need, holding his face between my hands as I bounce in his lap, emotion fusing with lust. A potent combination. When I pull back, I ask, “You…you haven’t been with anyone else? In two years?” “No.” “But you’re…”

“What? A man?” He peppers kisses down my jaw and nibbles my neck, his fingers raking through my hair as our bodies slap and grind together. “And men have needs?” I nod, tilting my head to the side to give him better access. “I’m your man, June. And the only thing I’ve ever needed is you.” Kissing and biting his way up the side of my throat, he nips my earlobe and says, “Never underestimate a man willing to wait forever for the woman he loves.”

“I love you, Brant. I love you…over the rainbow and back again.” A smile paints his lips as he moves in for a kiss. “I love you, Junebug. More than you’ll ever know.”

I loved the boy, and I’m in love with the man. Brant Elliott lays claim to all of my most precious memories of the past, and I know without a doubt he’ll claim my future as well. Finally he’s stirring beside me. Brant’s eyes flutter open as he stretches, a smile stealing his yawn when he registers my presence. I continue to play with his hair, sliding in closer. “Good morning, handsome.” “Morning.” The smile grows brighter as he wraps his arms around me and tugs me against his bare frame. “How do you still smell like lilacs after last night? You should smell like sweat and sex and…” Nuzzling my hair, he inhales deeply. “Very bad things.” I clasp his face and force his eyes on me. “There was nothing bad about last night,” I say, crinkling my nose.

“Fine.” He grins. “Naughty things. Dirty things.” Two fingers trail down my middle, landing at the juncture between my thighs. “Things that are making you blush right now.” My breathing becomes unsteady. “It’s warm in here. It’s August.” “I recognize that color in your cheeks, Junebug,” he rasps near my ear, curling his fingers inside me. “That’s all me.” I arch my spine with a little whimper, grinding against his hand. “We—we should probably talk, don’t you think?” He pumps in and out of me, slow at first. Languidly delicious. “Discuss things?”

“Ask me anything.” His fingers quicken their pace. “Why…why are you really in New York?” “You.” He nicks my shoulder with his teeth. “Do Mom and Dad know?” “Yes.” I feel his erection pressing into my abdomen as he continues to finger me, his own breaths unraveling. A gasp laces my words. “A-Are they okay with that?” “Tentatively.” My hips meet his thrusting fingers as I feel the pressure building. “Only one-word answers?” “It’s really hard to string sentences together when you’re about to come on my fingers, June.”

I reach out and graze the pads of my fingertips down his stubbled jaw, sighing with gratitude. “You’re smiling.” “I am,” he confirms. “You look truly happy.” “I am.” Licking my lips, I wonder, “Are Mom and Dad happy, too? About us?”

“I think they’re done being unhappy.” His knuckles graze along my cheekbone as he bites his lower lip with consideration. “I think it’s going to be a long, sometimes painful road. I don’t think it will be easy or quick. But…I think they’re ready to move forward. To start healing. I think your dad is ready to make up silly rhymes again and wear his ridiculous slippers. And maybe he’s not there yet, but he gave me his blessing to move to New York, knowing what that would mean, and…” His eyes slant, gaze skimming over my face. “I think he’ll get there…and we’re all going to feel pretty damn remarkable one day. And when that day comes, every unremarkable minute will have been worth it.”

“True happiness is worth every sad, unremarkable minute,” I tell him, my smile lingering. “It’s been worth every night sleeping alone, every tear spilled without you here to wipe it away, every rainbow I’ve watched paint the sky only for it to fade like it was never even there, all while I begged for it to come back. While I ached for one last glimpse.” Pressing a tender kiss to his mouth, I tell him, “It’s been worth the wait just to see you smile like that.” He smooths back my hair with both hands, pressing his forehead to mine. “I would’ve waited forever, Junebug…but I’m really glad we didn’t have to wait that long.” “You mean it?” I whisper.

“Of course I mean it.” I kiss him again—hard, messy, and p...

She glances at the open bedroom door, then back to me. Her lashes flutter and her eyeshadow glints as she nibbles her lip. “We don’t have much time…” “I promise it’ll be quick.” I waggle my eyebrows. Grinning, she hikes up her dress, and I bend her over the foot of the bed. As I slip inside from behind, I lean over and whisper against her ear, “I want to put a baby in you.” Her gasp morphs into a needy cry when I push all the way inside, filling her completely, and start thrusting. “Oh God, Brant…” In and out. “Do—do you really mean it…?” Faster. “Are y-you sure…?” Harder. I slam into her, the mattress squeaking, the headboard smacking against the wall in perfect time, likely pissing off our crotchety neighbor. Then I pull out of her for a second, flip her around, and link her legs around my waist. “I’m sure,” I grit out, sliding back home. It’s probably not the smartest choice, but there’s nothing I want more. We’ve only officially been together for a little under a year, even though it feels like a lifetime.

Sliding my hand up her belly, I picture it plump and swollen, filled with our beautiful child. “God, I want a baby with you, June.” I breathe out raggedly, slowing my pace and stroking her clit. She writhes and buckles beneath me, draping the back of her arm over her forehead, while her other hand squeezes the bedspread. “But I can wait.”

Rushing over to June, I unwillingly adjust her dress and plant a kiss to the tip of her nose. “Happy birthday, Junebug,” I murmur, lingering for a second kiss. Her lips are shimmering with my favorite cherry gloss as her smile blooms. I’m about to race to the front door when she stops me. “Brant,” she calls out. When I pivot, she sweeps her hair to one side and bites at that delicious cherry lip. “I want a baby, too.” My eyes flare, stinging with sentiment.

“It’s so beautiful. We had so many rainbows in New York when we were apart but none since you’ve been here with me, and I’ve been wishing for one so badly, ever since winter faded, and—” She spins around to face me. But I’m already on one knee. June’s words fall off, her lips frozen into an O shape. Her hand flies up to grip her chest, right over her heart. “Brant…?” “June Adeline Bailey.” I gaze up at her wide, glistening eyes as I dig the ring box out of my front pocket. I bought it in March and have been carrying it with me every single day, waiting for a rainbow. “Junebug.” “Brant,” she repeats, choking on my name. “Twenty-two years ago, I tossed a toy elephant into your crib, trying to give you comfort in the only way I could. And I knew in that moment as you gazed at me through the crib slats with your big blue eyes… I knew you were destined to become my comfort.” Emotion sweeps through me, stealing my words for a moment. I swallow. “That’s exactly what you became. You were the laughter on the other side of my tears, the solace to quell my nightmares, and the rainbow after every storm. You saved my life, June Bailey.”

“And I can’t think of anything sweeter than to spend the rest of that life with you.” Rising to my feet, I pluck the ring out of the box, holding it up between my thumb and forefinger.

“It’s rimmed with tiny sapphires. Blue like the eyes I fell in love with. Blue like the sky that gives us rainbows, and

the bluebirds that fly over them.” I quirk a smile. “Blue like the prom dress that brought me to my knees.” I take her shaking hand in mine, then slide the diamond over her ring finger. It’s a perfect fit. Blowing out a heavy breath, I lift my eyes to hers. “I want to dare to dream with you forever, Junebug. On top of being my best friend, my lover, my soul mate, my comfort and my courage…will you be my wife?” She nods. She nods and sobs and whimpers into her hands. But when she drops her arms and sniffles, inhaling a choppy breath, she asks, “Do…do you want the good news or the bad news first?” My heart nearly stops. I blink rapidly, trying to read her. These are happy tears. Right? Shit…was this too soon? Is she not ready? Trying not to black out, I choke out, “Good news first.” June doesn’t hesitate. She leaps into my arms, coiling her legs around my hips and linking her hands behind my neck. She kisses my shoulder, my collarbone, all the way up to my ear, and whispers, “Yes…yes. God, Brant, all the yeses. I’d marry you today, a thousand times over, in every version of every lifetime.”

“Wait…what was the bad news?” June sniffs, inching backward and drinking in a big breath. She places a flat palm over her stomach. “We’ll really need to start saving, Brant. I might need to pick up a second job.” I glance down at her belly. I look back up. “Weddings are expensive.” She moves her hand in a circular motion as a smile blooms to life. Then she says, “And so are babies.”

“I love you so much,” I murmur, stroking my palm down his stubbled cheek as his dimples wink back at me. “I love you, Junebug. More than you’ll ever know,” he replies, planting a kiss on my hairline. He breathes in deeply. “More than you could ever dare to dream.”

saw you eyeing me in the tree house.” “I don’t know what you’re talking about,” she murmurs against my T-shirt, her fingers drifting downward and inching beneath the hem. “Think we can occupy the kids with a movie while we lock ourselves in the bedroom?” “You mean, without tears or bloodshed?” “Valid.” Taking her by surprise, I bend down, grip her by the thighs, and haul her onto my back. June squeals, wrapping her legs around my waist and burying a fist in my hair for leverage. “I guess I can wait. But the moment you blow out your candles, you better be well on your way to blowing—” Her hand slaps over my mouth as she laughs out, “Brant!” “You can’t look at me like that and not expect me to obsessively think about what that look implies, Junebug.” I start to move toward the open patio door with June bouncing on my back, holding on tight through her giggles.

“I’m going to check on the cake. It should be cooled down enough to frost,” June tells me, sliding down my back. I give her butt a loving smack as she traipses into the kitchen.

“The pizza just got here.” June stands in the doorway to our bedroom, her dress wrinkled and her hair sticking up from the tickle fight with the kids. God, she’s perfect. I nod, watching as she strolls toward me with that same come-hither look in her eyes. She’s holding a paper plate topped with two slices of pizza. “Will you still look at me like that in fifty years when I’m old and wrinkly?” I wonder. Twirling the skirt of her sundress, she nibbles her bottom lip and crinkles her nose. “Look at you how?”

“That same look you gave me in the treehouse. Like you want to rip off my belt and see what’s hiding inside my pants.” She sits down beside me, dropping her forehead to my shoulder. “Of course I’ll still look at you like that.” I grin, taking the plate she hands me. “Liar.” “I’m serious. Age doesn’t change anything.” With her chin propped against my arm, she glances up at me with big, glittering eyes. “You’ll still be Brant and I’ll still be June.”