June First

by Jennifer Hartmann

Brant: I know you’re not okay. I know you were lying, and I know that because I know you better than anyone else in this world. You wear your heart in your eyes, Junebug, and I can see that your heart is torn apart. Mine is, too. Over Theo, over abandoning you, and over what happened between us at the dance. It may have started with a dare, but that’s not where it ended. We both know that, we were both responsible for letting it escalate, and we’ve both thought about doing it again. A breath catches in my throat as another message comes through. Brant: I know that scares you. I know you’re afraid and confused, but you don’t have to be. We’re not going to do it again. I’m not going to risk losing the most important thing in my life over a moment of weakness. An indiscretion that, right now, can be filed away as a lapse in judgment. It was just a blip. We’re still the same people. I’m still Brant, and you’re still June. Tears trickle down my cheeks, recalling the night I said those very words to him as I crawled into his bed, desperate for him to chase my nightmares away. Brant: I’m still that same boy who loves you with everything he is, who wants to be your comfort and your courage, and who would use his dying breaths to sing you your favorite lullaby. That kiss meant something, but it wasn’t everything. We’re going to move past it. We’re going to be bigger than it. We have to be…because we’ve already lost too much.