Pucking Wild (Jacksonville Rays, #2)

by Emily Rath

“I just told you that I love you,” she counters. “Me, Tess the Gemini With Two Dark Sides Owens, just told you, Ryan Puppy Langley, that I’m in love with you, and you have no comment?” “I told you I love you, like, five minutes ago, and your only comment was to go on a rant about boiling Troy in a vat of lava.” She gasps. “You did not.” I stare down at her as I run the tape back in my mind. “Babe, yes, I did. I told you I loved you, and I made a whole speech about how we’re fucking made for each other.” “No, we were talking about his leverage—” “Yeah, and then I said—” “Ohmygod, you said it,” she cries, eyes wide as she covers her hand with her mouth. “Wait—you said it and I missed it? You have to say it again.”

“You aren’t alone anymore, do you hear me? The only person who can keep you from me is you. In that sense, He Who Must Trip on a Shoe Tassel and Boil in Lava is right. You are in control, Tess. You’re in control of this,” I say, taking her hand and splaying it over my heart. “You’re in control of us. If you walk away, that will be your choice. If you stay, that will be your choice too. The door to my heart will always be open, and I will never seek to control you—”

“If you want me, Tess, take me. Make me yours.”

We’ve got you, Tess. We love you too. We’ve said it before, but your name may as well be Price. You’re on our ‘ride or die’ list,

Ilmari has the look of a Viking god who will snap you in half. And he will if you take even one step closer to our wife. But I am the fucking darkness,” he says, stepping closer to Troy. “I am where your nightmares go to multiply. And I am telling you now that if you even look in my wife’s direction again, I will knock every single jib from your mouth and make you choke on them.”

“Tess is mine. She left you and found herself a real man. Real men. Forget about Langley. He’s not your threat. It’s me. She’s mine now. And unlike you, I don’t lose the things that are mine. I protect them. You will not look at Tess, you will not speak to her, you will not so much as breathe her fucking air. I will give you this warning only once: Get lost and stay lost. Forever.”

Spinning on my heel, I hurry out of the kitchen through the side door, the cool January air caressing my fevered skin as I do my least favorite thing on earth. I kick off my heels, hike up the bottom of my dress, and I run. I run to Ryan.

All my life, I’ve been a lost bird, looking for a home, somewhere I could feel safe and loved and free to be myself. In my ignorance, I thought maybe money and power could buy those things. I was so wrong. It took me walking away from everything to find that home at last.”

“I came to Jacksonville to be closer to Rachel. I thought she was my home. But I was wrong. She’s just the first person to hold up a mirror and show me that I’m enough.” “And this new young man?” she presses, one brow raised. My smile widens. “He’s my mirror ball. His every surface reflects my perfections back at me. He loves me for exactly who I am. I’m not too loud for him or too opinionated. He doesn’t cringe when I tell jokes because he’s worried I’m funnier than him, pulling away his spotlight. He lets my light shine out as brightly as I want, and he shines it all back on me. I have never known a love or an acceptance of self like I have with Ryan.”

perhaps the sweetest form of justice comes from you boldly moving on. Leave them to each other. We survive, we thrive, and we never give them power over us again.”

Closing my eyes, I concentrate on the shell in my hand, feeding it my anger and frustration, my fear, my loneliness, my own self-defeat. I am Tess. I am strong and confident. There is no room for shame. I give it to the shell. I am beautiful and kind. There is no room for insecurity. I let the shell have that too. I am powerful. I am wanted. I am loved. There is no room for doubt. Giving the shell one last squeeze, I open my eyes and gaze out at the water. I watch the waves crash in once, twice, the white caps frothing against the sand as the water laps at my toes. Taking a deep breath, I cock my arm and fling the shell into the air, watching as it sails over the surf to land with a soundless plop in the grayish blue water.

I glance away from the water at the faces of the three women smiling at me, waiting for me, including me. They want me here. I’m wanted. I’m loved. I’m home.

“We’re starting small. Let’s live together. No labels, no cages. Just two souls happiest together. Whatever else comes—marriage, babies, life partnerships, or a respectful parting of the ways, that door will always be open,” I say, pointing to the front door. “I will never hold you back or hold you down. I don’t need any papers or legal proof to mark what we both know is true.”

“Ryan Puppy Langley, you’re the best person I know. You’re so kind and loving. You’re gentle, yet strong. You listen. You learn. You fight and grow. I’m in love with you, and I’d be honored to be your wife…someday…probably…” Her grins widens and there’s a twinkle in her eye. “I know that’s not the most romantic of not-proposals, but it’s as vague as I can make it.”

It’s a gift and a promise. She’s offering me hope. I just have to trust her and love her. This woman is mine. My friend, my soulmate. She already wears my jersey and sleeps in my bed. Someday, she may even share my name. As we sink to the floor, unable to wait for more, the name rings true in my mind: Tess Langley. My Tess. The cataclysm that came and shook me up. Now she’s mine to love. Mine to cherish. Mine to make happy for the rest of my lucky fucking life. I smile, kissing her perfect lips. Nothing has ever felt so right.

“I am marrying you so fucking hard! Don’t even test me!”

“You will never, ever live this down.” I smirk, glancing from him to Sanford. “I have that stupid beach puppy look on my face, don’t I?” They both nod. “Yeah, you’re embarrassing yourself,” Sanny says. “You’re embarrassing us,” Jake corrects. I don’t even care.

“No way,” Jake cries, one hand over his eyes. “Dude, that is so fucking cool. Marry her or I will.” “You’re already married, asshole,” Caleb says. “Technicality,” Jake says with a distracted wave of his hand. “Besides, you’ve never given me a message in skywriting before.”

that’s how I end up standing half-dressed in the middle of the locker room, a barbershop quartet flanking me on both sides, as the guys and Claribel snap a thousand pictures that will inevitably end up all over social media. Oh, yeah, I am marrying Tess tonight…if I don’t kill her first.

She smiles, holding out her left hand. “I’m asking.” I take her hand, not caring that we’re both trembling as I slip the ring on her finger. Then she wraps her arms around my neck, and I kiss her like she’s the only person I’ll kiss for the rest of my life. “Marry me, Ryan,” she murmurs against my lips. “I’m asking. Make me the happiest woman in the world.” “Yes,” I say with my whole soul. “Marry me.” “Yes.” All around us, the crowd goes wild.