“Why the hell are you naked?” Thank God, she’s just as flustered as I am. “Seriously, is there a portal opening back there? Are you some kind of ninja?” “I used the back door,” I call. “Well, get back in the pantry and let me find a towel or something,” she says. I turn sharply, ready to obey, and my elbow slams into the doorjamb. “Ouch—fuck—” The bags of chips slip from my arms and drop to the floor. Ignoring them, I slap a hand over my eyes like I’m twelve. Only problem is now I can’t see, and I slam my damn face right into the side of Compton’s pantry. “Ouch—shit—” Pain lances my nose as I
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