I Wish You All the Best

by Mason Deaver

Bodies are fucking weird, especially when it feels like you don’t belong in your own.

Nathan: So what’re you wearing ;)

GIGGLING

Don’t deprive me of that face of yours. It’s my one joy in that miserable place.

SQUEEEEEE

“Yeah, yeah, yeah. Trust me, I lied enough to Mom and Dad to know.” She takes a seat next to me on the bed. “So spill.” “There’s a party.” “Alcohol? Don’t lie to me.” “Yes.” I stare at the floor. “Oh, Ben.” “I’m sorry. Don’t be mad.” Hannah lets out this low laugh, which seems weird for her. “Please, I’m not mad. I’m your sister. I did a lot worse shit when I was your age.”

Idk why this made me cry but its so funny and cute and typical of an older sibling 😭😭😭

“Damn, boy.” He rolls down the driver-side window. I want to shrink. “Do I look okay?” “Yeah! Kind of hot if I’m not lying. Girls will be all over you tonight.”

Cried again fmd

“Can’t spell ‘subtext’ without ‘butt sex.’ ”

This is funny as fuck

“Just consider it payback for all the birthdays and Christmases I missed.” There we go again. I feel the guilt rising up like bile. “Hannah.” “Nuh-uh.” She sticks the brush in front of my face. “No arguing, you just worry about graduating right now, okay?”

Crying yet again

“Cross your heart and hope he’s bi?”

The motto

“Hey.” He takes my hand. “They don’t deserve you. You’re ten times the person they are, combined, even.” “Thanks,” I say. “Whatever happens”—his grip tightens a little—“I wish you all the best, Benjamin De Backer.” He says it with a smile. “You deserve it.”

Fuck my eyes, they leak

And then the tears come. “I was just a kid. I didn’t have a phone or anything. How was I supposed to call you without them knowing?” “I didn’t . . .” Hannah runs a hand through her hair. “But that was it. A phone number I couldn’t call, and an address to a place I couldn’t get to. I understand that you had to leave. That you couldn’t take it anymore, I’m not mad at you for that.” I wipe my eyes with my sleeve, and Dr. Taylor slides the box of tissues toward me. “But I was alone.

This shit is so indicative of kids with an abusive home situation, especially when one leaves for the sake of their own mental health and the other feels abandonned 😭😭

“I’m the one who should be fucking sorry. The first chance I got I left that house and never looked back.” Her eyes finally meet mine. My eyes, our father’s eyes. “I fucked up.”

Been there sis

“Well, to be honest, in the sort of situation you two came from, there are rarely winners,” Dr. Taylor says. “Tell me what you’re feeling, Hannah.”

WAAAH

“What do you want from Hannah now? What can she do to make you feel better?” “I don’t really know.” I don’t want anything else from her; she’s done so much for me. “She’s the only reason I’ve made it this far.” “There’s nothing that you can think of?”

Sibling guilt is real friends

We have so much of our parents in us, sometimes too much. But we can’t help it.

Horrifying realisation for anyone

“It’s not your fault,” I tell her. “It’s them . . . it’s no one’s fault but theirs.”

I can’t believe I waited so long to tell him this, I can’t believe I ever thought he could hate me.

“I’m glad I met you, Nathan,” I say, because there’s nothing else to say. I’m so happy right now, so ridiculously and terribly happy that I don’t think I’ll ever be able to accurately describe the feeling. “I’m glad I met you too.” His fingers find my hair again. “I guess we need to talk, huh? Because I can’t exactly call you my boyfriend, can I?”

“What about my person?” “Your person.” I like the way the words sound. On his lips and to my ears.

Cryin

“I wish you all the best, Benjamin De Backer.”

SAME