The Kaiju Preservation Society

by John Scalzi

You have no idea how difficult it was for me to not say, ‘Welcome to Jurassic Park!’ to all of you just now.” “Jurassic Park didn’t end well for anyone in it,” I pointed out. “Book or movie.”

“The only real question is, who are the monsters?” “They ask that question in every monster movie, you know. It’s an actual trope.” “I know,” Tom said. “What does it say about us that it’s relevant every single time they ask it?”

“Edward and Bella?” I said. “You named these kaiju after friggin’ Twilight?” “I didn’t,” Satie said. “If it were up to me, I would have named them Sid and Nancy. Fits their personalities better. But no one asked me. One of you millennials did it.”