The Graham Effect (Campus Diaries, #1)

by Elle Kennedy

“Say it again.” “I love you, Gigi.” A brilliant smile fills her face. “I love you too, Luke.” That does something to me. The name I’ve loathed for so long, the name I’ve recoiled from, leaving her lips. Hearing it now, coming from that sweet voice and gorgeous face, accompanied by those three words, well, I guess I don’t mind being Luke. I’ll be whoever she wants me to be.

“So. You’ve got a girlfriend.” He chuckles. “You neglected to mention that the last time we spoke.” “I was still wrapping my head around it.” “I like her.”

I sigh. “Remember when Garrett Graham hated me for being late to practice? Well, now he’s got an even bigger reason. Dude can’t stand me.” “I’m sure you’re exaggerating.” “Trust me, I’m not.” I notice him eyeing me over the rim of his mug. “What?” “You look happy,” Owen says. “Can’t believe I’m fucking saying that. But you do.” “Hell’s frozen over, right?”

“Bring your girlfriend.” He winks. “You really like saying that word.” “Yeah, ’cause it’s you and you don’t do girlfriends. I’m gonna keep saying it forever just ’cause I know it makes you uncomfortable.”

“Do you blame me?” He lifts his head, confused. “For what?” “For Mom.” I stare at my hands for several seconds, then force myself to meet his gaze. “Do you see him when you look at me?” He recoils. “Fuck no.”

“You didn’t hurt her,” Owen says quietly. “I didn’t save her either.” “You were six. Trust me, if I’d been there, I wouldn’t have done much either.” Regret digs a crease into his forehead. “I’m the one who should be apologizing. I couldn’t do anything for you after it happened. I begged my dad to let you come live with us, but he wouldn’t hear it.”

“I know. It’s not your fault. I know what he’s like.” “Yeah, but I still felt bad. I’ll always feel bad about it, that I had a family while you got shuffled around to different foster homes. My dad’s an asshole, but it’s nothing compared to the hand you got dealt.”

“And no, Ryder. Just to answer that question again. When I look at you, I don’t see him—I see you. You’re my little brother. I love you.” “I love you too.”

“You should be prepared,” Owen eventually says, glancing over to grin at me. “For what?” “You’re gonna marry that girl.”

“What do you mean?” “This choice that you made.” I sigh. “Look, I know you like Case. And he’s a good guy, but it was never going to happen, even if Ryder wasn’t in the picture. We were never getting back together.” Dad’s mouth dips in a slight frown. “I still don’t get why it ended in the first place, Stan. It never made any sense⁠—” “Because he cheated on me.” His jaw drops. Half a second later, anger floods his expression. “No,” I interject, holding up my hand. “See, this is why I didn’t want to tell you. I didn’t want you to think badly of him.”

“I get it.” He shakes his head, chuckling. “If you’d just told me this months ago, I would have let it go.” “Oh, it’s that easy to shut you up?” “It is.” He rounds the counter and slings his arm around me. Mom returns to the kitchen and eyes us in amusement. “What’s going on?” “Case cheated on Gigi,” reveals Dad. She gasps. “No.” “Yes,” I tell her, “but it’s over now because I’m in love with somebody else. So, let’s all just move on.” Dad starts to cough. “In love with somebody else, huh?” Mom teases. She turns to Dad. “See? I told you.” He looks ill now. “Of all the men out there…”

“And because there’s so much talent available to us in that sphere, we’re only taking on two college students for the time being.” He smiles at me again. “You’re one of the best players out there.” I ignore my quickening pulse. God. This man has mastered the art of drawing out anticipation. “With that said, I thought I should tell you in person that all the slots have been filled. I’m sorry, Gigi. You won’t be making the roster at this time.”

“He said I’m one of the best college players, but he’s not looking at stats. He’s trying to focus on some of the older players, the women out of the pros who have more experience competing on the world stage.” It makes sense, but I don’t say that out loud. She’s far too distraught to hear it right now. “I can’t believe I didn’t make it.” The words are spoken on a shaky, anguished moan. I slide my fingers through her hair, stroking gently. “I’m sorry. I’m really fucking sorry.”

“I failed,” she says weakly. “You didn’t fail.” “Am I on Team USA, Luke? Because last time I checked, I’m fucking not.” She drops her forehead in her palm, breathing unsteadily. “You’re not on Team USA yet,” I correct gently. “You’re still young.” She’s doggedly shaking her head, refusing to accede to the point. “I failed.”

“Or maybe I’ll never make the team.” She starts to cry again, and although it kills me to make it worse, we promised each other we’d always be honest. “Maybe you won’t,” I agree softly. She rears back, releasing a cross between a laugh and a wheeze. “You are so bad at this.” “Maybe you won’t ever make the team,” I repeat. “Doesn’t change the fact that you’re the single greatest player in women’s college hockey right now. Fairlee said so himself. He’s not looking at stats, because if he was, you’d be on that roster in a heartbeat.”

“Nobody likes failure, G. But I maintain that this isn’t failure. This is just one moment in time.” “A moment in time,” she echoes weakly. “Yes, and right now, in this moment, you’re down. But that’s okay because I’m here to lift you up.” “Always?” she whispers, peering at me with those big gray eyes. “Always. You fall, I pick you up. Always.”

and Gigi’s lying in my bed when she suddenly rolls over and says, “Do you feel like coming to Vegas with me?” “Are you asking me to marry you?” I inquire politely. “No, I’m asking you to come to Vegas and watch us play. My parents will be there. My brother too.” “Gee, great. Can’t wait to see them.”

In fact, Hannah Graham is pretty much my best friend now. Gigi teases me about how frequently we text. It started after the winter holidays, and at first, I pretended it made me uncomfortable. Shrugged it off. Said it was weird she kept contacting me. That was all talk. Whenever her mother checks in on me, it unleashes a flood of warmth in my chest. It’s a totally foreign sensation. But it’s not entirely unwelcome.

I turn off the TV and move onto my side, propping up on one elbow. I bite my lip as I gaze down at her. “I don’t want anybody else. You know that, right?” Gigi blinks. “Where did that come from?” “I don’t know. I just need you to know I don’t want to be with anyone else. Ever.” A soft smile tugs on her lips. “Me too.” She reaches up to touch my face, rubbing the stubble on my jaw. “This is it, Luke. I think we both know that.” Yes, I think we do.

“I’m so hungry. Why does this hotel not have room service?” she moans. “Because you specifically asked me to book one that didn’t,” I remind her, rolling my eyes. “To quote you, you’re on a championship diet and must not be tempted by room service dessert.” “Why do you listen to me?” “I’ll start ignoring your wishes,” I promise.

“She looks feral,” Wyatt remarks. “You guys raised a feral child.” I snicker. “Hey, blame him,” Hannah says, jerking a thumb at her husband. “He’s the one with the hockey gene.”

Hannah yanks him back to his seat. “Garrett, sit down. I didn’t bring your fake beard and glasses.” Wyatt laughs. As he resettles in his seat, Garrett exchanges a look with me. I can’t deny I’m also a bit annoyed. “This chick is too rough,” I tell him. He nods. “Those refs better start paying more attention.”

“She’s just winded,” Wyatt says, his green eyes glued to the ice. He sounds like he’s trying to convince himself. “She’s fine⁠—” Before he even finishes speaking, I’m racing down the aisle. Pushing through people without excusing myself, Gigi’s dad hot on my heels.

“You can’t go out there,” he insists, getting in my face again. A fucking stampede wouldn’t be able to stop me from getting to Gigi. “Like hell I can’t,” I growl. And then I give him another firm shove, forcibly moving him out of my way. “That’s my wife out there.”

Now, Ryder sits beside me on the bench, while my parents and brother stand in front of us. Speechless. Now that the doctors are gone, the bomb Ryder dropped before I went down can finally be addressed. There’s no defusing it—that thing went boom the moment he broke the news to my parents.

“G, I love you. You’re my sister. But that’s the most cliché thing I’ve ever heard in my life. I got married in Vegas. That’s so generic I wouldn’t even write a song about it.”

Ryder’s still hovering over me, running an agitated hand over my forehead because he doesn’t believe I didn’t hit my head. It’s cute. I touch his cheek in reassurance, and the moment my fingers connect with his skin, the anxiety leaves his eyes. I have that power over him, and he has the same power over me.

“I know everything you’re going to say.” I keep talking when it’s obvious my parents won’t. “You think we’re too young. It’s too fast. But you’re wrong. And yes, I can imagine thousands of stupid, idealistic girls before me saying those exact same words after running off with their boyfriends. Wyatt’s right, it sounds cliché. But Ryder and I aren’t stupid.” I shrug. “And in case you’re just joining the party, neither of us has an idealistic bone between us.”

“We know exactly what we’re getting into. It’s not going to be perfect. We’re going to run into issues. Life’s going to hit us hard from all directions, all the time. But we’re choosing to do life together. We went into this with our eyes wide open.” I notice a sheen of tears clinging to Mom’s eyelashes, and for a moment I revert into a little kid. “Please don’t be mad at me,” I beg her, but deep down I know even if she stays mad forever, that’s just something I will have to deal with. I’ve made my choice. He’s it.

I glance at my family again. At the brick wall that used to be my father. His prolonged silence finally triggers something in me. Impatience. Annoyance. Maybe a bit of anger too. “Are you going to say something?”

“This is, truly, the stupidest thing you’ve ever done.” I flinch as if I’ve been struck. “And I’ve never been more disappointed in you.” “Garrett,” Mom says sharply.

When I pass Hannah the water bottle, I notice her eyes drop to the silver band on the ring finger of my left hand. Gigi and I grabbed the rings this morning from a small jewelry shop on Main Street. It still startles me every time I look down and see it there.

“Married,” her mom says with an amused look. “Married,” I confirm.

“I know you think we’re crazy,” I say, shrugging. “Actually, no. I don’t. I know my daughter. She doesn’t enter into things lightly. And I think I’m starting to know you too. You’re not impulsive.”

“Hey, he’s trying.” She’s not wrong—for the past three days, Garrett has texted, called, and left multiple voicemails for Gigi, asking to talk. But his daughter is stubborn. She’s the one refusing to accept the olive branch. “He hurt her,” I say quietly.

“It’s not an easy thing growing up without a mother.” I shrug. “I had foster moms.” She searches my face. “Were they good to you?” I give an abrupt shake of the head. My throat tightens. “That’s what I figured.” She squeezes my hands. “And that’s why I came over. I wanted you to know that I’m here for you. I mean it, Luke. I have no doubt you’ll be in our lives for a long time to come, and I’m not at all bothered by that.”

“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have brought up your mother.” “No, it’s okay.” My voice breaks. I drag my forearm across my face, wiping my eyes with my sleeve. Before I can stop her, Gigi’s mom pulls me in for a tight hug and now I’m crying in her arms like a little kid. This is so fucking embarrassing. She reaches up and smooths a lock of hair away from my forehead, unfazed by my tears. “All I was trying to say is, you’re family now. I know I’m not your real mom, but I think I did pretty well with my own kids.”

That is easier said than done. A week passes and Gigi still refuses to speak to her father. Garrett’s gotten so desperate he even called me and asked me to intervene on his behalf. I said I’d try. Because one, he’s my idol. And two, he’s now my father-in-law. But…she’s my wife. Wife.

We’ve chosen each other. And she’s right—I don’t expect it to be easy. Life never is. But she’s the one I want to face all the adversity with. She’s my partner, and no matter what happens, we’ll always have each other’s backs.

WYATT: Hurt my sister and I’ll hurt you. You feel me, Bill? ME: Bill? WYATT: Brother-in-law. Tried to write BIL but autocorrect didn’t like it. So you’re Bill now. Don’t hurt her and we’ll be good. ME: I won’t, and cool. WYATT: Welcome to the family. I figure we need to make an effort to get along. Now that we’re stuck with you forever. ME: Thanks, Bill.

“I have no right asking you for favors,” Garrett starts ruefully. “I know I haven’t been very welcoming to you. When you came home with Stan for the holidays. When you showed interest in my camp. I probably could’ve been…less dickish.” I shrug. “All good. I don’t hold grudges.” “I usually don’t either. But I will say”—he offers a pointed frown—“I don’t love that you didn’t ask for my blessing before you married her.” I tip my head at him, curious. “Would you have given it?” “No.” A snort slips out. “Then, better ask forgiveness than permission, right? Because I would’ve married her either way. I—” My jaw drops. “Holy shit.”

Displayed on it is a large poster print depicting a barren white landscape bisected by a rushing river. Block letters read: HORIZONS: THE YUKON TERRITORY

“Dude, that’s Dan Grebbs,” I tell Gigi’s dad. “Who?” “The nature sounds guy your daughter is obsessed with. Come on, we need to get in line.” He’s dumbfounded. “Why?” “Because Gigi loves him, and I want to get her a signed photo. I’d get the CD too, but she probably already has this track downloaded.”

Garrett sighs and says, “I’ll go grab the coffee.” The line moves slowly, so I’m still standing there when he returns with two Styrofoam cups. He hands me one. “Black okay?” “Great, thanks.” He’s staring at me again. “What?” I mutter. “Nothing,” he says, but he keeps staring.

“Uh. Hi. Mr. Grebbs. Huge fan.” From the corner of my eye, I see Garrett pressing his lips together to stop a laugh. “Well, really, it’s my wife who’s the fan. She has all your…soundscapes.” Garrett coughs into his hand.

“What is your wife’s name, young man?” “Gigi.” I spell it for him.

He hands it to me. “So thoughtful of you to do this for your wife.”

“Quit looking at me like that,” I grumble. “I know it’s stupid.” He just sighs, shaking his head to himself. “You really love her.” “Till the day I die,” I say simply.

His fingers curl tight around his coffee cup. “Is she going to avoid me forever?” he asks miserably. “I hope not. But you know her—she’s stubborn.” I shrug at him. “And she’s spent her whole life trying to please you.”

“Luke Ryder?” A man wearing glasses and a sports coat appears in our path. Instantly, my guard shoots up ten feet. “Yes?” I say warily. A hungry gleam lights his eyes and suddenly he reaches into his pocket for a mini recorder that he shoves in my face. “Do you have any comment about your father’s upcoming parole hearing?”