The Graham Effect (Campus Diaries, #1)

by Elle Kennedy

Amusement gleams in her eyes. “Flower boy. How’s it going?” I give her a pained look. “Let’s not make ‘flower boy’ a thing. I have a reputation to protect.” “That’s not a promise I’m willing to make. G’s upstairs.”

Gigi gives me a pensive look. “What?” “Do you think kissing is cheating?” I don’t expect the question. “What do you mean?” “If you’re in a serious relationship with someone and they kiss someone else—do you consider that cheating?” “One hundred percent.” “Really?” “Sure. If you love and respect someone, you shouldn’t be kissing someone else. End of story.” Gigi smiles at me. “What?” I say awkwardly. “Sometimes I struggle with how black and white you are.

Maybe it’s not true. Maybe I can be a boyfriend. I mean, why not?

As if sensing my troubled thoughts, she wrinkles her brow. “What’s wrong?” “Nothing.” I swallow through my suddenly dry throat. “What do you think if we went out somewhere?” The groove in her forehead deepens. “Somewhere where?” “I don’t know. Like on a date.” She blinks. “You’re asking me on a date?” I shrug.

“Gonna interrupt right there, Gisele, because we both know I’ve never given a speech in my life.” That gets me a grin. “Fair point. I’m talking about that day in the therapy room when you said you don’t ‘do’ feelings.” She air-quotes me.

“Yeah. Did you pack a dress by any chance?” “Yes…” I say suspiciously. “Go put it on. And be quick. We don’t want to miss it.” “Miss what?” “Meet you in the lobby in fifteen,” he says without answering. I’m intrigued. Ryder is not Mr. Spontaneous, so I definitely want to see where this is going.

“Come on, we gotta get out of here quick,” I urge, already heading across the lobby. “My teammates are coming down for dinner soon. Someone might see us.” He trails after me, hands in his pockets. “God forbid.” “Oh, are you ready for Case to hate you five seconds after you two called a truce?” Ryder flinches. “Good point.”

My mouth drops open. “Oh my God. You’re taking me to the opera?” Ryder shrugs. “You said it’s the only date you’re interested in going on.” “I was lying.” “Yeah, I know.” His eyes gleam. “And now you’re being punished for it.” “You are such an asshole,” I say, but I’m laughing.

“I want…to feel important in my own life,” I admit. “Achieving this is a way for me to finally step out of his shadow. I can be an Olympic gold medalist. Something my dad will never be.” I groan in desperation. “It feels so petty to say it. Is that awful?” “Depends on whether it’s the only reason you want to compete.

“Of course not.” I flinch. “It’s like the teeniest part of it. A sliver of a percentage that pokes at the back of my mind sometimes. Competing on the world stage is so much bigger than him. It’s exciting.” “Good. Focus on the excitement. But also acknowledge that the sliver exists.”

“It’s like you refuse to voice even a shred of negativity, otherwise it makes you a bad person. Or you feel like you need to be eternally grateful for being born wealthy and gifted.” He wraps his arm around me, his lips gently brushing mine as he strokes his hand down my bare arm. “Just feel what you feel. It’s okay.”

It’s the undeniable awareness that I’m developing feelings for this guy. “I…” I take a breath, attempting to steady my voice. “I’ve never met anyone I felt comfortable sharing all that with.” I peer into his bottomless blue eyes, always floored by how vivid they are. “I don’t feel like you judge me. About anything. Ever.” “I don’t.” “Do you feel like I judge you?” “Never,” he says simply. Then he visibly gulps, and I know precisely how he feels. This is fucking terrifying.

“Gisele,” he says. “Mmmm?” “Are we dating now?” A smile tickles my lips. I rise slightly on my elbow and gaze down at him. He’s biting his lip and it’s adorable. “Yeah. I think we are.”

While I desperately try to convince myself that I’m not in love with him.

I nonchalantly pluck one of the scarlet blooms and keep walking. Then I search on my phone, grinning to myself. Ten minutes later, Gigi walks into the hot tub area, wearing the Speedo that never fails to make me burn for her. I stick out the flower. “Here.” She sighs. “Oh God. I’m scared to ask, but…what international day is it?” “National Cotton Candy Day. Seemed like one you’d celebrate.”

Her features strain. “You guys are really starting to get along, huh?” “We are. I like him,” I say begrudgingly. She grins. “That was painful, wasn’t it?”

He lets out another heavy breath. “Look. Kid. I don’t give a shit about other people’s lives. I only care about a few things. My wife, my daughters, my grandkids. And my men. Once they leave Briar, that doesn’t change. They still belong to me, you understand?” He nods in the direction Gigi went. “Her father is like a son to me, which means she’s like a grandkid to me. Which means don’t fuck around.”

My head is elsewhere and she knows it. “All right. What’s going on?” she demands. I shrug. “Nothing.”

“You’re lying. Did something happen at practice this morning? Trouble in one of your classes?” “No, none of that.” “Then what?” Another shrug. “Look, if it’s all the same, I’d rather not talk about it.” There’s a beat. “Okay, whatever you want.” She hops off the couch. “Let me check on the lasagna.” I get up too. “No, you know what? I should go.” She blinks in surprise. “What?” I’m already pulling my jacket off the hook in the hall. “I’m sorry, G. I’m really not feeling it.” Concern fills her eyes. “Luke.” “Don’t call me that,” I snap.

“Then you shouldn’t have fucking come.” Now she’s angry. “You could have just sat in your own house and sulked and left me the hell out of it.” I clench my teeth, my gaze returning to her. “But you did come, so why don’t you take this opportunity to behave like an adult and tell me what’s wrong?”

Gigi’s not talking to me. As in, she’s straight-up ignoring me. All right, that’s not entirely true. She did text to say she doesn’t feel like seeing me right now.

“Women, amirite?” Shane says, refocusing his attention on the Patriots game. “Are you just going to say that to everything I say?” I ask him. “Yes.” His gaze remains glued to the screen. “The Pats are playing and your problems don’t really interest me.”

“Hey,” I say awkwardly. “I don’t understand this,” she says in lieu of greeting. I don’t understand it either.

“I know this is weird,” I tell Darby. “Literally the weirdest thing ever.”

“You called me here to talk about your love life?” she shrieks. Then she lets out a calming breath and speaks in a reverent voice. “This. Is the greatest day of my life.” “It has to stay between us,” I warn. “Luke Ryder has a girlfriend.” “Why is that so shocking?” “Oh my God. You don’t even know how excited I am right now. You’re seeing someone?” I nod. “Is it serious?” “I think so.” “Oh my God.” “Stop saying that.” Darby narrows her eyes at me. “So how did you screw it up?” “Who says I did?” I grumble.

“Oh, Ryder. You silly, stupid man.”

But the second you start dating them, the expectations change.” I rub my forehead. “I don’t like that.” “Well, hate to break it to you, but that’s how relationships work. You have to talk. If something’s wrong, the other person wants to hear it. They need to hear it.”

Darby grins at me over the rim of her teacup. “You know I’m right, don’t you?” “Yes,” I grumble. “I know you’re right.”

“Are you crazy? I’m not after your girlfriend,” I growl. “You sent her a text that says, and I quote: Come over to my place and don’t tell your boyfriend.” I falter. “Oh, in hindsight, that was worded poorly.”

Ryder shrugs. “Darby came over because I needed advice on how to make you not hate me.” I know I shouldn’t laugh, but I do. His gruff, sheepish admission instantly warms me over. God, this man. “And I think I figured it out.” Another shrug. “I was hoping we could talk. For real.”

“Besides, if he hadn’t cheated, you and I wouldn’t be here right now. So in a way, he…” He led me to you.

“Case is going to have questions,” I warn. “I don’t care. I came to the realization tonight that I can’t live my life worrying about his feelings.” She’s right.

She hesitates for a moment. “What about this invitation—do you want to come home with me?” “Home,” I echo. “Yes.” “With your parents.” “Yep, that’s what home means.” “Will your father be there?” “He lives there, so yes.” “Your father, Garrett Graham.” “Okay, you know what? I revoke the invitation.”

“Why are you so surprised?” “With your prickly demeanor? Seems like you’d scare animals away, send them fleeing in terror.” I bend down to rub behind Dumpy’s ears. “Nah, man. We understand each other.” I look at Bergeron. “Right?”

As if reading my mind, she says, “Yes, Case always stayed in the guest room. But if you’re good, I’ll let you sneak into my room after everyone is asleep.” “Hard pass.” “Seriously?” “Seriously. I don’t want to get murdered by Garrett Graham.”

“Thanks for having me, Mrs. Graham.” “Oh, call me Hannah, please,” she insists. Her husband offers a deceptively pleasant smile. “And you can call me Mr. Graham.” So that’s how it’s going to be.

I blanch. “Oh, God, please don’t send me out there.” I’m only half joking. She laughs. “Oh hush, he’s really not that scary.” “I need you to think about how scary you believe him to be and then multiply that by five million.” I reach for another potato to peel.

“It means we’re together.” “I’m tagging in,” Garrett says. His arms cross too. “Where do you see this going?” Everywhere.

“I’m not exactly sure how to answer that. We’ve been together a while now. It’s going good.” I force myself to meet their respective gazes. “I consider it to be serious.” Wyatt narrows his eyes. “I looked you up. You beat somebody up in the Juniors.” I nod. “Yeah, I did.” “Got an anger problem? Is that what this is?” “Wyatt,” Garrett chides. Then he raises an eyebrow. “Although I am curious about that particular incident.” “Guys, stop grilling him.” Gigi walks in, annoyance clouding her face. “Stop it. You don’t have to answer any of their questions, Ryder. In fact, Ryder helped Mom cook, so he doesn’t have to clean. He’s excused.”

Hannah follows my gaze. “That’s from our annual Tahoe trip. Garrett always insists on taking a group photo. Nobody is ever prepared, and someone usually falls in the lake.” She shrugs. “You’ll see for yourself this summer.” “Who says I’ll be there?” “You will.”

“So? When you know, you know.” Her lips twitch as she examines my face. “Got it. We’re still fighting it. Don’t worry, Luke—we’ll save this for another time.” She laughs softly. “Give your head some time to catch up to your heart.”

It’s nice having Ryder here for the holidays. I can’t say my dad and Wyatt have fully warmed up to him, but Mom certainly has, and it’s kind of adorable to see the two of them together.

I have successfully managed to turn Briar’s grumpy, bad boy hockey co-captain into a hold-my-purse boyfriend. I’ve won the world.

The suspicion that tickles at my brain is confirmed when Owen lifts a brow and says, “How long have you been dating my brother?”

“All right. Let’s have it,” I say with a sigh. “You lied to me,” she answers flatly. “I didn’t lie.” I bite my lip, forcing myself not to avoid her increasingly angry eyes.

“Best friends. Still are.” I hold up my wrist. “He’s the BFF you like to rag me about. Got these fucking things when we were sixteen and they still haven’t fallen off.” She smiles. I can sense her anger melting away. “That’s a good sign, I think.”

“I’m not good enough for you,” I whisper against her lips. Alarm fills her eyes. “Ryder⁠—” “I don’t know if I’ll ever be. But I want to try.” And I do. I mean that. I know I have my flaws. But I need to level up to be with this woman. She forces me to be better. I want to be better for her. I want to be her hero. Emotion clogs my throat. “Hey,” she says, reaching up to touch my chin. “What’s going on?” “I love you.”

“Say it again.” “I love you, Gigi.” A brilliant smile fills her face. “I love you too, Luke.”

“And no, Ryder. Just to answer that question again. When I look at you, I don’t see him—I see you. You’re my little brother. I love you.” “I love you too.”

“You should be prepared,” Owen eventually says, glancing over to grin at me. “For what?” “You’re gonna marry that girl.”