Dustwalker

by Tiffany Roberts

“Ronin.” He met her eyes. “I won’t break.” She grabbed his wrist and forced his hand down. “Touch me.”

She wanted him. She’d wanted him before tonight, but had shoved her desires aside. Anger was easier than lust, easier than caring. It didn’t matter if it was directed at him, or her feelings, or herself.

“Like what it means to be alive.” A shuddering release of breath. “What do you think it means?” She rubbed her cheek against his arm, hiding most of her face from him again. “I’m not sure, yet. But I think I get a little closer, every moment I spend with you.”

He was no more his optics than she was her eyes, no more his actuators than she was her muscles. She was a sum of her parts, and somehow independent of them.

“Because I enjoyed being near you. Enjoyed holding you. Hearing your slow breaths and the rhythm of your heart. Every other night I can remember, I’ve spent alone.”

“Flattery can be true, if you mean it. Doesn’t hurt to tell a girl something you admire about her. You should try it sometime. Maybe you—” “Everything.” “What?” Lara’s throat was suddenly dry. “Everything I’ve come to know about you, I admire.”

“You still bother because it means…hope. That everything will be okay, some day. Because it means a chance at a future in a world that wants to destroy us. It means you are not alone.” He covered her hand with both of his, meeting her gaze and holding it. “Let this ring be my vow. To protect you. To provide for you. To give you all you need that’s within my power, and find a way to give you whatever’s not.”

“Then I vow to protect you, too, to the best of my ability. To place my trust in you and never break yours. To remind you, every day, that you are alive.”

“Did you just kind of marry me?” Something fluttered inside Lara. She grinned. “I don’t have a ring to give you, but yeah. I guess I did.”

“Will you remember me, when I’m gone?” His stride faltered, body going rigid before he stopped. She looked up again to find his eyes on her. “Even through another Black Out, I could never forget you, Lara Brooks.”

“My vow to you remains,” Ronin said, squeezing her hand gently, “but I must amend it. I will love you, even after darkness takes me.”

“It was you, Lara. You’re my purpose, you’re my reason for carrying on, the reason I haven’t sat down in an abandoned building and never stood up again. I don’t think I’m selfish, normally, but I need you. I just found you, and I don’t think I can go any further without you.”

“Not nearly as bad as I did, after I blew up,” Ronin replied. “And you’re always beautiful to me, regardless.” “You always say the nicest things.” Her eyes stung. “You’re gonna make me leak again.”

“I did those things because I love you.” Something in her expression softened. She placed her hand on his chest, fingers curling in his coat. “You did things before you fell in love with me. Before you even knew what love was. What was your reason then?”

“You’re all that matters, Lara Brooks.” She smiled. Her hand stopped at the center of his chest, directly over his core processors. “Love me, Ronin.” He eased over her, nestling his hips between her thighs. “Long after the Dust claims me.”

“I will love you even after darkness takes me,” he said, softly.