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His eyes drop to my mouth, and for a second, I think he’s going to kiss me. I want him to. Take control of me so I get out of my own head. Make the inner monologue stop for just a minute.
The man who has come to mean more to me than anyone else wants intimacy, but not sex. I can care for him, about him, but I can’t be in love with him.
“Sorry for what?” My voice is a little shaky, but I doubt he notices. “That I can’t love you the way you deserve.” He pulls me along with him across campus to our building.
It’s Brendon. My Brendon.
Nothing has ever felt as right as this moment, with this man, in this room. He’s my everything. And that terrifies me.
I’m so gone for this boy.
Now you know how I’ve felt for months. Knowing I’m getting to him is a special kind of high I wasn’t expecting.
“Are you a needy little cock slut?” My body tenses, and my cock starts to thicken under the table. “Or maybe you’re a good little cock sucker? Hmm? Do you need some praise with your degradation?”
“You’re comfortable with me, I’m a cuddle whore, and orgasms are awesome. It’s a win-win.” Please don’t break my heart.
My best friend, the love of my fucking life, is in pain and fighting himself.
“You’re my favorite person. You’re my person. There’s nothing about you I would change. You hear me?”
“Whoever made you believe that is wrong. You are exactly the way you are supposed to be. You aren’t annoying or too much. Not to me, not to Jeremy, not to the rest of the guys on our team.”
