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Adalyn Reyes was beautiful. And she was also a hot mess. She was a beautiful hot mess of an inconvenience I wanted out of my hair.
“You’re going to hurt yourself if you keep this up,” he said so softly that I couldn’t make sense of his words. “You’re in shambles, darling,” he murmured, green eyes returning to mine. “I can hardly see you underneath the mess.”
He nodded, and when the man squeezed the sponge gently, letting a few water drops fall onto the clay, I was certain. I had to be sick.
“But I didn’t ask you to come for me.” My throat went tight with the words. “You never need to ask, love.”
wonder who made you believe you don’t deserve to be fussed over,”
“You should have called me.” The word left me in a whisper. “Why?” “Because you needed me, and I wasn’t there with you, and I hated that.”
“Then I get a trail of messages and I go to you and find you in my shirt. That some other guy sent you.” He dropped his hand. “And I was never a jealous man.”
“You need to stop looking at me like that, love.” My eyes snapped right back to his face. Ada darling. Love. That smile on his face again. I couldn’t keep up. “I was not looking,” I whispered, cheeks flaming. “You were, and my ego fucking loved it.” He braced his hands on the island and leaned forward. “Other parts of me, too.”
“You were looking at me the way you are now. Just like that. I didn’t want it to end.” His words were soft, barely a whisper. “Like what?” “Like I’m something precious. Worth looking at.” His face fell. “Why would you think otherwise?” “Because no one ever looks at me that way.”
“Did you just say ‘fecking hell’?” “I don’t curse around the girls anymore. Manager said it was unprofessional.”
You’re smiling really big.” Something took flight in my chest, and I made myself ask. “Why?” “Because you’ve just given me a reason.” “A reason for what?” “To play the longest game I ever have.”
“Christ, Adalyn,” he said. “I would have protected you. Not anything else. I would have done anything to protect you.”
“I think,” he finally said, his hand suddenly cupping my face and tipping my chin up. “That for someone who’s always justifying everybody else’s shit behavior, you’re extremely hard on yourself.”
“I think that you’ve worked so hard at keeping yourself contained, so in control and safe behind that hard shell you put around yourself, that it was all bound to collapse.”
“Don’t you see? You are anything but dispassionate, Adalyn. You’re relentless, determined, fiery, and have made every moment I’ve happened to be next to you as alive as the fucking sun lighting everything up at dawn. Anybody who fails to see that is either blind or some worthless piece of sh—”
“I’ll always give you more than what you ask for, love. Even when you don’t know what you want.”
“I’ve always felt like I never really clicked anywhere. Like, I always needed to make a bigger effort to show everyone that I deserved to be there. And here you are.” I shook my head. “Making me feel like you’d close the gap to get to me. Like, I don’t need to convince you.
“Fuck him,” Cameron said, bringing my gaze to him. “Fuck them. Fuck everyone who has made you feel like you’re not worth everything you deserve.”
“You’re naked, in my bed, with my cat on your lap, speaking to some other man. Should I be concerned, love?”
“CAMERON?” My best friend spit from my phone. “As in Cameron Caldani, as in the CAMERON CALDANI?” A panicked pause. “Is that Cameron Caldani’s cat? You’re in Cameron Caldani’s BED.” His voice went high. “Is Cameron Caldani the one who thoroughly f—”
“But as much as I love the man on the field, I will break your face if you hurt her.” I sighed, not because I doubted him but the opposite. And I feared this would actually scare Cameron away. “I’d love nothing more than for you to be with her, give her a family of cute cats, babies, or whatever makes us best friends for life, but don’t break her heart.
“I really wish you were right. I really wish this whole thing wasn’t a game, but life is one. And no matter how much I try, I seem to always, always lose.”
“I am a selfish man, Adalyn. And I wanted you to have this. I didn’t want him—them—to ruin today for you. This one thing you worked so fucking hard for. I couldn’t care less about the little league, but I was bloody winning this for you. I wanted you to go to the game and be fucking ecstatic. Not a worry in your mind. Smile and laugh the way you so rarely do. Have a good time with me and the girls and collect the joy you deserve. The goddamn love you don’t need to earn. That’s what my selfishness makes me do.”
“Love is never the problem. Love is easy, like in the movies. We’re the ones who make it complicated. That’s why I’ll forgive her for missing the game.” I finished tightening the elastic. “But if she really is your everything, and she’s dealing with something important, then shouldn’t you be with her? Even if you messed up. What if she needs a sub to play in her place? She might not like you right now, but that doesn’t mean she doesn’t want you there.”
My ring dangled off the chain around her neck, and I knew then that I’d marry this woman one day. I’d give her the cats, the babies, a farm of terrifying baby goats if she wanted one. I’d do anything in my power to get that chance. I knew with every ounce of who I was.
