In the Weeds (Lovelight, #2)

by B.K. Borison

My shirt clings to my skin, and her eyes cling everywhere else—a smile curling at the corners of her mouth.

He looks like every decadent thing I’ve ever indulged in. Flannel and scruff and a box of baked goods in his hand.

SEASONS CHANGE AND SO DO WE

Not every day is a happy one, and it shouldn’t be. It’s in the trying, I think.”

Trying to be happy is like—it’s like telling a flower to bloom.” He crosses his ankles and drags his palm against his stubble. “You can’t make yourself be happy. But you can be open to it. You can trust yourself enough to feel it when you stumble on it.”

Evelyn is like a spring storm. She appears without warning, makes everything around her bloom, and then leaves with the wind.

“It’s okay to want different things,” she says. “People change. You’re allowed to change. Doing less doesn’t make you less.”

I want this version of him in my memory always. Cornfields flashing by the windows, magnolia leaves in his hair. Eyes hooded but glowing, his knuckles resting under his chin. Handing me his secrets like he wants me to hold them for him.

Why the hell would I crack myself open just for her to look at everything inside and decide it’s not enough? So I can feel this same twist in my gut every time she leaves without a word? Continue to lose pieces of myself until I’m a collection of ragged edges? No, thank you.

Missing Evelyn is like missing the bottom step on a flight of stairs. I keep expecting her to be where she’s not.

“Sometimes love is greedy, kiddo.” My dad sets his mouth in a firm line. “Sometimes it’s a little bit selfish too. You think it’s never crossed my mind that your mom deserves something better than the life we carved out for ourselves here? It has. A million times. A million and one. But I’m holding on to her with both hands. I’m trusting her to make her own choices. To choose me.”