Necessary Endings: The Employees, Businesses, and Relationships That All of Us Have to Give Up in Order to Move Forward

by Henry Cloud

You have heard it said that people resist change. That is not always true. It is more true that people resist change that they feel no real need to make. For example, if I said, “Get up and go outside,” but you were relatively comfortable where you are, you would resist my suggestion. But if I said, “The building is on fire! Get out now!” we would see little resistance to change. We will quickly make changes that we feel will make pain stop or help us avoid it. On the positive side, we will do the same thing. If I asked you to stop shopping where you shop but you were pretty comfortable at your present store, then you would not go out of your way to change. But if I told you that another store, even a few miles farther down the road was offering three for one, you would be more likely to go. So getting your brain to move to create an ending, and getting the people around you to do the same, is going to take both: the fear of the negative and the draw of the positive.