Necessary Endings: The Employees, Businesses, and Relationships That All of Us Have to Give Up in Order to Move Forward

by Henry Cloud

set limits on yourself in terms of what you will allow yourself to be exposed to in terms of the fool’s collateral damage: • “Susie, at this point, I have tried to get you to see the issue and change it, and that has not helped. So I have to make sure that at least it is not affecting me [or the team, or the company, or the results, or the family] any more. I can’t afford to miss another quarter’s numbers because you are unwilling to do what I have asked. So I am taking this responsibility away from you. I have to give it to someone who will do what I need.” • “Sam, I cannot allow myself to continue to be hurt or endangered by your drinking. So the next time it happens, I will leave the event or the house and go somewhere where I am not affected by it.” • “Keith, your anger is hurtful to me, and I can’t allow myself to be yelled at anymore, so the next time it happens, I will leave.” • “Roger, this team and the environment we want to have around here are important to me, so I can’t allow your abusive behavior to ruin it anymore.”