The Art of Happiness in a Troubled World

by Dalai Lama XIV

Our Emotions and the Distortion of Reality Since wars begin in the minds of men, it is in the minds of men that we must erect the ramparts of peace.—FROM THE UNESCO CHARTER

Perhaps one of the most crucial things to recognize is at the root of much of human conflict and violence are certain destructive states of mind. For example, when you are under the influence of negative emotions like anger, hatred, fear, extreme attachment, and greed, this tends to open you up to mental projections and distortions of thinking which obscure you from truly understanding the reality of the situation, and this can lead to greater conflict.”

A kind of narrowing of vision takes place, as if seeing the problem through a certain kind of mental filter. And one thing that seems to be true is that strong emotions lead to unrealistic thinking. In fact, all of the afflictive or destructive emotions have the potential to become obstacles to seeing reality clearly.”

you may find people reacting based on events that took place in the past, sometimes even many centuries ago. They are unwilling to look at the reality of the present situation, clinging so strongly to conditions that are no longer even present. This represents a kind of distortion of thinking, a narrowing of one’s perception.

So, sometimes I mention that hatred prevents you from moving on—it chains you to the past. In fact, a key premise on which the concept of reconciliation is based is not to react with strong anger to events that have already passed.” As the Dalai Lama spoke, I could not help but think about the virtually infinite capacity of human beings to hold on to past grievances. It seemed to have no limit. Later, after returning home from Dharamsala, I began to notice, for instance, how in committing atrocities in the twenty-first century, Islamic extremists routinely dwell on events that happened many centuries ago as part of their justification for murdering innocent civilians today.

Slobodan Milos̆ević, for example, the Serbian leader later to be charged with crime against humanity and genocide, marked his emergence as a powerful political force by committing an act that was sure to trigger an emotional response and stir up hatred among the Serbs. He deliberately went to Kosovo to give a rousing speech at the site of the Battle of Kosovo Polje, the spot where the Serbs were defeated by the Ottoman Turks in 1389. By playing upon deep-seated Serb fears of defeat and subjugation, he could strengthen his own power, and later push people to commit acts that they might otherwise have refused to do.

Recognizing that ultimately the only way to prevent such violence is to uproot it at its source, we continued our investigation, tracing the development of violence back to its origins in the human mind, to destructive emotions and distortions of thinking.

Becoming more and more animated as he discussed the various types of distorted thinking, he explained, “I think one of the most dangerous manifestations of this kind of narrow perspective is our tendency to oversimplify and generalize, which is particularly common in times of crisis.

To me, bin Laden is an individual, he is an Arab person, and also he is a Muslim, yes, but at the same time he cannot stand for the entire Islamic civilization.

“In fact, you’ll find this kind of thing everywhere. Here in India, for example, sometimes you may have some violence take place within a community. But instead of focusing on resolving that particular situation and dealing with the specific individuals responsible for the act, some Hindu leader may proclaim, ‘Look, this is what the Muslims do to us Hindus!’ Or, some Muslim leader may equally say, ‘Look at what the Hindus are doing to us!’ And the moment they overgeneralize and exaggerate in this way, it evokes a different kind of response, creating unrest within these communities. I feel that this is not good, it’s absolutely wrong. Actually, it is a kind of manipulation.”

“If you view the person as intrinsically evil, as a permanent and unchangeable part of their nature, there would be a greater tendency to see getting rid of the person as the only solution. In Buddhism, where we recognize cause and effect, and understand that there are particular causes and conditions that lead the person to act in a negative or destructive way, and thus recognize it can be a temporary condition, it opens up the potential to change.”

By blaming Hitler as the evil force behind all the atrocities committed during World War II, for example, there might be a tendency to not look for other causes, so one could ignore the role played by the German people and political and cultural conditions of the society during the Nazi period. “The second main danger,” the Dalai Lama continued, “is when the label ‘evil’ is applied to an individual or group of people, it naturally sort of demonizes that person or group. Once this kind of perception takes root, a process of dehumanization takes place.

“You know, Howard, when it comes to the afflictive emotions and the distortions of thinking that accompany them, these can become the source not only of violence but of so many problems. We find that these distortions of thinking, that kind of narrowing effect on our thinking or perception, can manifest in so many ways to cause misery and undermine the basis of our happiness.”

As we mentioned earlier, the manufacturing site of the negative emotions is in the brain’s limbic system, in structures such as the amygdala, which is responsible for producing emotions such as fear or hostility.

These types of distortions will limit your awareness of any wider issues involved in the problem that you are dealing with. Unfortunately, this kind of thinking hijacks reasoning, logic, and critical thinking by largely bypassing the centers of higher thinking in the brain. This explains why the changes in our way of thinking caused by the negative emotions limits our ability to find solutions to our problems.

These kinds of “narrowed” thinking are common to all the negative emotions, but as we mentioned, each of the negative emotions was custom designed to help deal with a particular type of danger. So, in addition to the general narrowing effects of negative emotions, each of the negative emotions has its own specific distortions of thinking, specific effects on a person’s judgment and decision making that can be distinguished from the rest of the negative emotions.

When making decisions, angry people also tend to have an underlying feeling of certainty about their facts or opinions, which can lead to a feeling of confidence and optimism but also can impair their ability to be objective or rational. These tendencies can be traced back to anger’s most basic function—when we are frustrated or thwarted in achieving a goal, anger kicks in to remove the obstacle. The cause is seen as something external that we must fight against or overcome. So, for example, this general orientation toward dealing with some kind of threat or obstacle is associated with the tendency to see external agents as the cause of the problem, and with the characteristic tendency to blame others whenever anger is elicited. In fact, studies have shown that the mere experience of anger can automatically activate ways of thinking that lead to prejudice.

For example, in one study, anger was induced in a group of subjects, then later they were asked to evaluate a series of fictional court cases, having nothing to do with the issue that made them angry—the angry individuals tended to blame the defendants much more and to recommend harsher punishments.

Not only can destructive emotions cause distortions of thinking, but distortions of thinking can also cause destructive emotions; it can work both ways.

The Dalai Lama replied, “Yes. I think that if you really want to develop the most effective way to deal with that kind of fear, you need to begin by identifying the different categories of fear, so you can apply the appropriate method of dealing with each one. . . .” “Different categories in what sense?” I asked. “One category is fear that is valid. Realistic fears, where there is a real threat or danger. The appropriate response to this legitimate kind of fear is to have a sense of precaution and take active measures to protect yourself, to whatever extent is possible.”

The Dalai Lama mentioned, for instance, how fear can lead us to exaggerate dangers. This has been confirmed with an unusual experiment on emotions after 9/11, conducted by researchers at Carnegie Mellon University. Unlike most scientific studies, which often use small numbers of subjects, drawing them from the most handy fodder for scientific experiments—university undergraduate students—this study used a representative sample of one thousand Americans of all ages and backgrounds, measuring their emotional responses only days after 9/11 and then again several weeks later. The study revealed, first, that the media can have a strong influence on which emotions people experience—stories that showed people in Islamic countries cheering with joy after 9/11 elicited anger, and stories showing anthrax-laden letters going through the U.S. mail system elicited fear, as one might expect. The research also suggests that either anger or fear can be elicited by other means, such as leaders using certain kinds of rhetoric. But the study also revealed how these emotions can cause distortions of thinking—such as exaggeration. The investigators found that individuals responding with fear tended not only to greatly overestimate the danger of themselves becoming a victim of terrorism within the following year but also led them to overestimate other kinds of threats and dangers (although consistently estimating themselves to be at less risk than the average American).

As we have seen, fear arises from our most primitive urges resulting from activation of the amygdala. The primitive brain mechanisms involved here include simplification, generalization, and Us and Them categorization—all prime ingredients for stereotyping. Now, when strong superior/inferior divisions and hatred are thrown into the mix, all it takes is for some leader or government propaganda to plant the idea that our existence is threatened in some way by the “inferior” group, to trigger the type of fear that leads to mass violence.

Thus, because we can no longer trust that fear will always faithfully protect us from danger—and in fact because of its potential to cause disaster; our potential to be manipulated by fear; the potential for fear to arise based on distortions of reality, exaggeration, and lies; the potential for fear to undermine human happiness; the potential for it to rise up and destroy us—it becomes critical to remain vigilant. We need to use our human reason, judgment, and critical thinking to monitor our fears, to assure that we look at our fears realistically, as the Dalai Lama suggests, to react with fear based on real threats rather than on imagination, exaggeration, and lies.

Perhaps sensing my dissatisfaction with his answer, he laughed, and added, “Well, Howard, I suppose there always might be some individuals who simply are not reflective enough to have any fear. Those who remain ignorant, oblivious to dangers, and go happily about their lives, fearless. . . .” “Oh, you mean the lucky ones?” I joked. “That’s right, those lucky ones!” he repeated, laughing.

I felt he must have more to offer, knowing his ability to maintain such a positive state of mind in all circumstances. He seemed to speak of the possibility of his own and others’ destruction without a trace of worry in his voice or manner, with a sense of complete fearlessness and acceptance, but without a sense of giving up, as if he were at peace with the idea, but with a tone of compassion, not an uncaring tone. Surely, I thought, that kind of attitude did not come about spontaneously; there must be an approach to cultivating it. I decided to take another tack, become more concrete, still in hopes of some solution, some insight. “Well, let me ask you this: Has anybody in Dharamsala ever spoken to you about their fears of the nuclear war?” “Yes.” “And what did you tell them? What did you advise them, when they came to you and said they were worried about the possibility of nuclear war?” “I talked to them and told them that I, too, shared their concerns.” Still somehow unable or unwilling to accept his response, I continued to press on as if he had some kind of magic solution he had not yet revealed: “Well, when people came to you, your friends or family, and they expressed to you their fears about this nuclear war, isn’t there anything more you can tell them other than sharing their concerns? I mean . . . is there anything you can say that would help relieve their fears or anxieties? No words of comfort you can give them?”

Howard, we mustn’t forget that often what gives people comfort and assurance is the act of sharing their fears with someone they love. That can be very important.”

He had explained in the past how our fundamental attitude about problems and suffering can affect how we cope with these things when they inevitably arise. Accepting suffering as a natural fact of human existence allows us to focus more on finding a solution to the problem, and less on feeling that life is unfair, that one is unfairly and unreasonably singled out for misfortune, becoming less caught up in the drama of the “victim” role.

one’s fears and anxieties in psychotherapy can in itself sometimes provide powerful relief of at least one layer of worry or anxiety simply by the patient discovering that they are “normal,” that others share similar worries, that they are not unique or alone in their fears.

Research has shown that self-disclosure fosters social bonds, which in turn reduces individual stress as well as encourages others to do the same, which can take root in a society to reduce more widespread social tension. There is a wide body of evidence showing the legion of benefits from social bonds and a sense of closeness, from physical-health benefits to its direct effects in increasing feelings of well-being and levels of happiness.

study at UCLA identified another fascinating phenomenon: Merely labeling the emotion of fear reduced it. In studies using fMRI technology, researchers showed subjects a series of photos with faces displaying different emotions and asked the subjects to verbally identify the emotion. When the subjects named “fear,” the brain scan showed activation of an area in the prefrontal cortex that is thought to exert dampening or inhibiting effects on the amygdala (the fear-generating area) and a reduction of activity in the amygdala!

The power of disclosing one’s inner thoughts and feelings is so great, in fact, that even if a person has nobody to talk to, simply the awareness, articulation, and labeling of one’s negative thoughts and emotions appear to have substantial benefits, both physical and mental. Experiments have shown that fifteen minutes of writing about one’s thoughts and feelings about adverse or traumatic events can reduce stress and help people cope.

“Yes,” he said, “for example, there is always Shantideva’s approach, which you and I have discussed in the first Art of Happiness book. In brief, Shantideva [the great eighth-century Indian Buddhist teacher] suggests that we analyze the situation and repeatedly reminds us: if the problem is such that there is a solution, there is then no need to worry about it. In that case we should focus on finding that solution. If, on the other hand, there is no possible solution, there is no point in worrying because you cannot do anything about it anyway. So when you approach a situation with that kind of perspective, then even if you do confront tragedy, you have a greater chance of dealing with it. So, that may be helpful in some situations.”

“Well, if we are talking about individual fears and anxieties, on a personal level, you’re right that many approaches may be needed, which could include assessment of the person’s physical condition, medical illnesses, mental illness such as clinical anxiety disorders, and various treatments that could include attention to diet and exercise, medication, psychotherapy, and particularly cognitive behavioral techniques.

A person’s underlying outlook and motivation can certainly affect how he or she responds to life’s adversities, threats, or dangers,” he replied. “For example, an attitude of kindness and compassion brings a sense of self-confidence, an inner strength. That will reduce fear. In fact, you will often find cases where there might be two individuals in the very same dangerous situation, yet one of them copes much more effectively than the other—here it’s one’s outlook that could make the difference. In fact, an individual’s response to a dangerous situation and ability to deal with fear can often depend more on the person’s outlook and personal characteristics than on the nature of the situation itself.”

“Other outlooks,” the Dalai Lama repeated. “Yes, another factor that is relevant here that can influence people’s response to a looming threat is the degree to which they are aware of their own impermanence. Generally, in our day-to-day life, most people become so engrossed in their everyday activities that they do not give much thought to the idea that one day we may die. So, without much reflection on this fact, we tend to have an underlying sense that our life will go on and on, that we will be around forever. The stronger you cling to this notion, the more intense the fear will be when there is a threat to that existence.”

“You know, Your Holiness, I’m just sort of thinking out loud here; I guess the main point at issue here is that you never know what the future is going to bring, that violence or even death could erupt at any time. We often have no control over that. But I’m wondering if there is a way to transmute one’s fear, to use it in a positive way. For example, maybe we could think about our own mortality, and use that to value every moment we have right now, think about our priorities in life, and live every day to its fullest.” The Dalai Lama nodded enthusiastically. “Yes, that is very possible. . . . And in fact there are Buddhist meditations where the emphasis is placed upon being mindful of one’s own mortality and contemplating the inevitability of one’s death.

So the whole purpose of that meditation is to utilize your life in the most effective way, put all your effort to make the present moment most meaningful, not simply to engage in some morbid thoughts about your own death.

There is no question that the world today is filled with dangers. Genuine danger, a legitimate threat to our safety, evokes fear—that’s natural. The Dalai Lama points out that it is foolish to live without fear; after all, healthy fear has a protective function. But the fundamental question remains, with so many conflicts in the world today, with so many man-made threats that could erupt at any time, so much uncertainty, where financial markets could collapse at any time, how can we go about our daily lives without allowing fear to sap our capacity for joy, undermine our sense of confidence and optimism about the future, or even paralyze our lives?

This approach begins with awareness. As we have seen, fear can be preconscious, we can react with fear before we are even aware of it, so becoming aware of our fears brings it into the realm of reason—on a biological level, this means transferring control over our responses from the primitive amygdala to the more advanced prefrontal cortex, where we can modify our more primitive blind urges with the higher brain functions of reason, critical thinking, and a wider, more long-term perspective, tempered with human kindness and compassion. Part

And, even more important, an individual can deliberately change how they perceive a threatening situation, which can be an effective way of reducing fear. In Part Three I describe to the Dalai Lama an experiment in which a group of subjects were able to reduce their stress when they viewed a task as a challenge instead of a threat. All it took was a deliberate change in outlook, in which they perceived the task in a new way.

Fear can have effects on the individual, group, and societal levels. Conflicts, wars, and widespread acts of aggression and violence can be the results when fear takes root. When dealing with conflicts you’ll find that when an undercurrent of fear continues to run through one or both sides in a conflict—which generally involves fears for one’s safety, security, or continued self-identity—as long as the other side is seen as a threat in some way, a conflict will never be resolved.

The Dalai Lama had also gotten me to take a fresh look at our basic human nature—not something that I routinely thought about—as well as reflect on the sources of human evil. Finally, I felt that he had shared some good practical strategies, including a useful approach to dealing with fear.

Not only that, but the very first issue he raised, identifying the growing loneliness and alienation in our society and the erosion of our sense of community, our sense of connectedness, was something that I had never even given any thought to, but once he mentioned it, it was as if a veil had fallen from my eyes—not only did I see evidence of it everywhere, but its importance to human happiness seemed to be undeniable, and I wondered how I had never noticed it before.

off in Dharamsala. Quickly penetrating to the very heart of the matter at hand, the question of how to find happiness in our troubled world, I began. “You know, Your Holiness, when you think of all these problems in the world, problems which undermine human happiness—violence, terrorism, prejudice, poverty, and the gap between rich and poor, the environment, and so on—and think about how vast these all are, sometimes it all seems so impossible. . . . I mean, with so much suffering in the world, the possibility of people finding genuine happiness seems to be so remote sometimes.”

world’s problems.” “So, at this point, then, I’d like to shift to the individual level, and explore ways to find happiness despite the world’s problems,” I said. “Very good,” he replied. “But you know,” I sighed, “with so many problems in today’s world, so many stresses and difficulties in daily life, sometimes it seems that the best way to deal with it all would be to just ignore everything going on around us, or become a hermit or something. But that can’t be the solution.”

Stress and these negative mental states have to do with our own response to those conditions, and show a certain lack of ability to cope with our environment.

Because in one series of meetings in Dharamsala a while back, we were discussing acts of evil and violence, and we had traced the cause of this to its roots in the negative, destructive emotions. Well, in those discussions we spent some time on the specific negative emotion of fear, but we didn’t get to a deeper discussion of how to deal with the others, or the negative emotions in general. I wanted to return to that topic, so today it would be great to have a little general review of overcoming the negative emotions! It never hurts to do a little review of important topics,” I argued. “And besides, in the past we discussed this only in the context of personal development, but now we are discussing these issues in a different context, within a wider framework or awareness of societal factors, too.”

“OK. To review, then, this training of the mind involves cultivating positive states of mind and overcoming the negative states of mind, the destructive emotions, or what are known as the afflictive emotions.