Transitions: Making Sense of Life's Changes

by William Bridges

Finding out what it is time to let go of often provides the way to initiate a transition meaningfully. Unfortunately, people are more likely to ask what new thing they can add to their lives. Even though they may get an interesting answer to that question, they won’t be able to use it to make a meaningful transition because people have to start with endings—letting go of whatever it is time to let go of—before they can make new beginnings. If they fail, they find that even “great ideas” and “really exciting possibilities” simply do not help them. So start with What is it time to let go of in my own life right now? 2. What is standing backstage, in the wings of my life, waiting to make its entrance? The answer is something internal, something subjective, although it may be presented to you as an external event or situation that brings it to your attention. If it appears in its subjective form, it may take the shape of an idea or a fantasy or a question you ask yourself: “I’ve never worked for myself before”; or “Why didn’t you ever follow up on that old idea of joining the Peace Corps?” It may present itself to you as an unexpected call from an old friend who wants to tell you about what he is doing these days, or as a fascinating story that you cut out of the paper that described a new social venture meant to divert young people from dangerous activities before it is too late.