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In the end, it’s not the changes that will break your heart; it’s that tug of familiarity.
Because the truth is that now that he’s here, she can’t imagine it any other way. Now that he’s here, she worries that crossing an entire ocean with someone between them might be something like torture.
It was his fault, all of it, and yet her hatred for him was the worst kind of love, a tortured longing, a misguided wish that made her heart hammer in her chest. She couldn’t ignore the disjointed sensation that they were now two different pieces of two different puzzles, and nothing in the world could make them fit together again.
“Is it better to have had a good thing and lost it, or never to have had it?”
Beside her, Oliver is craning his neck to read the signs for customs, already thinking about the next thing, already moving on. Because that’s what you do on planes. You share an armrest with someone for a few hours. You exchange stories about your life, an amusing anecdote or two, maybe even a joke. You comment on the weather and remark about the terrible food. You listen to him snore. And then you say good-bye.
“If you love something, set it free.” “What if he doesn’t come back?” “Some things do, some things don’t,” he said, reaching over to tweak her nose. “I’ll always come back to you anyway.” “You don’t light up,” Hadley pointed out, but Dad only smiled. “I do when I’m with you.”
“Love is the strangest, most illogical thing in the world.”
His hand on her back is like something electric, and being here like this, so suddenly close to him, is enough to make her lightheaded. It’s a feeling like falling, like forgetting the words to a song. “I can’t believe you’re here,” she says, her voice soft. “I can’t believe you found me.” “You found me first,” he says, and when he leans to kiss her, it’s slow and sweet and she knows that this will be the one she always remembers. Because while the other two kisses felt like endings, this one is unquestionably a beginning.
