Clearly, practice makes all of this better. Practice framing questions in which standards are embedded. You will get better and better at it. Ask, for example, “What’s fair here?” “How do we decide?” “Should I pay for your mistakes?” “Is it your company’s goal to make customers happy?” Not getting upset when the other person violates their own standards is key. It takes a change in attitude to get it right. For example, every time someone tries to cheat me, I tell my team not to get upset. “Look at it this way,” I say. “We just made money!” We name the bad behavior and get a chit. I am happy
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