From the Bookshelf of The Self-Development Book Club: Reading for Growth …

Ego Is the Enemy

Ryan Holiday

Start date: March 1, 2021

Finish date: March 31, 2021

Discussion: ▶️ Book of The Month (BoTM)

Discussion leader: Trisha

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Sep 06, 2022 Srinivasan Nanduri rated it really liked it · review of another edition

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“Ego is the enemy of what you want and of what you have: Of mastering a craft. Of real creative insight. Of working well with others. Of building loyalty and support. Of longevity. Of repeating and retaining your success. It repulses advantages and opportunities. It’s a magnet for enemies and errors. It is Scylla and Charybdis.” Ryan Holiday

- When you're successful, you must stay humble, keep learning, and focus on your work and practice. When you fail, embrace it with appreciation and move on t “Ego is the enemy of what you want and of what you have: Of mastering a craft. Of real creative insight. Of working well with others. Of building loyalty and support. Of longevity. Of repeating and retaining your success. It repulses advantages and opportunities. It’s a magnet for enemies and errors. It is Scylla and Charybdis.” Ryan Holiday

- When you're successful, you must stay humble, keep learning, and focus on your work and practice. When you fail, embrace it with appreciation and move on to start over again.
- The book is divided into 3 parts: Aspire, Success, Failure
- Aspiration leads to success (and adversity). Success creates its own adversity (and, hopefully, new ambitions). And adversity leads to aspiration and more success. It’s an endless loop.
- The first principle is that you must not fool yourself—and you are the easiest person to fool. —Richard Feynman
- Live with Purpose Not Passion: the first thing you need to do is ask yourself, “why do I do what I do?”
- “The critical work that you want to do will require your deliberation and consideration. Leave passion for the amateurs. Make it about what you feel you must do and say, not what you care about and wish to be.”
- “Humility is what keeps us there, concerned we don’t know enough and that we must continue to study. Ego rushes to the end, rationalizes that patience is for losers (wrongly seeing it as a weakness), and assumes we’re good enough to give our talents a go in the world.”
- "Purpose deemphasizes the I. Purpose is about pursuing something outside yourself as opposed to pleasuring yourself.”
- Be a lifelong student even after—especially after, your major accomplishments. Eliminate what isn’t necessary. Stay open-minded. Set goals and live on purpose.
- Talk & think less; do more - Talking is easy, everyone does it, but silence is rare in today’s world. Your ego tells you that you need recognition from others, but real confidence doesn’t need to talk, it produces work. Talking destroys action. Sit quietly and work. Let go of the distractions of social media and of the news, and focus on your work. Watch how much better you get
- Talking and thinking too much drain the energy you could be using to put into your work. At times we definitely need to be thinking, such as when envisioning goals, but if you spend too much time thinking and talking about what you are going to do, you are less likely to actually do it. Where are the results? Stay focused on execution. Think when you need to and then get to work.
- “Living clearly and present takes courage. Don’t live in the haze of the abstract, live with the tangible and real, even if—especially if—it’s uncomfortable. Be part of what’s going on around you. Feast on it, adjust for it.”
- “What is rare is not raw talent, skill, or even confidence, but humility, diligence, and self-awareness.”
- “Your ego screams for people to acknowledge you. But you must do nothing. Take it. Eat it until you’re sick. Endure it. Quietly brush it off and work harder. Play the game. Ignore the noise; for the love of God, do not let it distract you.”

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