Matt’s Comments (group member since Feb 20, 2017)

Matt’s comments from the Navigating Indieworld Discussing All Things Indie group.

My derpy-do mistake: ignoring marketing. I'm just now working on Amazon sponsored ads, a good nine months into my writing "career."

It's just so damn boring. Keywords, keywords, and more keywords. Categories, categories, and more categories. Writing enticing ad copy. Scheduling promos, and then using an e-megaphone to let everyone know. Etc. etc. etc.

Standard writer's complaint, yes. Once I make the megabucks I'll hire someone to do all this for me.

I've seen several first-person blurbs, and I like the immediacy of that style - especially if the novel is written in first person. A buyer/reader sort of hops seamlessly from blurb to story.

GROWL

I went with a new book promo service for this Mega Sale I'm having, and they're promoting the wrong book! I wanted "Double Lives" to be spotlighted, but they're doing "The Clerk" for some reason. The ASIN I gave them was for "Double Lives," and all the confirmation emails I received from them had that ASIN.

Thankfully, they have a live chat, and I've just got it sorted out - I think. The promo for "Double Lives" will still run its full length, just one day later. I suppose this snafu may put me ahead, since "The Clerk" got some "free" publicity.

I was wondering why "The Clerk" was kicking "Double Lives's" butt on Amazon. This is likely the reason why.

The promo site is called Books Butterfly. It's very "busy" and looks amateurish, but they do "guarantee" results. We'll see if they're worth it.

If they aren't, or if they don't fix their mistake, I'll be back with more GRRRs.

I'm having my first ever FREE promotion August 8th (today) to August 12th. Both of my novels are available for the attractive price of $0.00.

Get "Double Lives" for an injection of fast-paced superhero wildness. Get "The Clerk" for an introspective take on modern life.

It takes an infinitesimal amount of energy to go over to Amazon and load these onto your Kindle - so go do it, folks! Every download creates an image of a rainbow and a cute puppy in this author's mind.

Currently, "Double Lives" is #1 on the free list for "Kindle Store > Kindle eBooks > Comics & Graphic Novels > Martial Arts"...

...because it's the only book on that list.

XD.

As they say in baseball, "Hit 'em where they ain't."

Links:

"Double Lives" - https://www.amazon.com/dp/B072Q5KB75/

"The Clerk" - https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01MSW66QO

Alex wrote: "@Matt, I think things are a bit different over here with psychologists and therapists, though I can't say that's the case definitively. I've heard they're discouraged from simply medicating nowaday..."

It may have changed here in Merica, since my experience was years ago. I doubt it though; we're the Land of Pills. Watch TV for an hour and you'll see 25,000 drug ads. (One of the reasons I don't have TV.)

The problem is really acute with the elderly. They scarf down whatever the doctor prescribes because they're scared of the inevitable decline.

It's shameful, because a lot of health problems can be solved by dieting, supplements, and exercise. You know, the boring stuff. I've never heard a traditional doctor talk about this at length. A homeopath I went to recently did, and I learned a lot about dieting and supplements that are safe.

But, you know, homeopaths are crazy! Water pills! You should go to a traditional doctor, so they can prescribe a quick-fix pill!

I envy you folks in the UK, with your single-payer health care system. Here in Merica, we're still puttering along with some godforsaken quasi-governmental nonsense.

Oh, and after failing laughably the first time, Trumpcare is back, and it has more traction. I don't see it passing the Senate in its current form, though. It's great political theater - the Republicans' central message for years has been "Repeal Obamacare," and then when they finally get up to bat they've got nothing.

As long as you're not choosing a category that's completely contrary to your novel, I don't think anyone will care. If I put Contemporary Romance, yes, people would be like "WTF?" But consider "Mashup" - pretty much anything qualifies as a mashup, right?

I know most writers want to do the right thing and be faithful to their story, but that's not feasible when it comes to Amazon categories. You have to bend a little.

You're on the right track, though. Look at more international categories similar to the "British & Irish" one. Us Yanks can't touch those, but you can.

You can still improve your categories.

Let's compare our novels. Right now, "Written in Blood" is at #743,163 Paid in Kindle Store. "The Clerk" is at #755,169. Our sales rankings are comparable. Our category rankings, however, are very different.

Here are your rankings:

#1437 in Books > Mystery, Thriller & Suspense > Thrillers & Suspense > Crime > Vigilante Justice
#3387 in Books > Mystery, Thriller & Suspense > Thrillers & Suspense > Crime > Serial Killers
#7654 in Kindle Store > Kindle eBooks > Mystery, Thriller & Suspense > Thrillers > Crime

And mine....

#262 in Kindle Store > Kindle eBooks > Literature & Fiction > Humor & Satire > Dark Comedy
#381 in Books > Literature & Fiction > Genre Fiction > Mashups
#587 in Kindle Store > Kindle eBooks > Humor & Entertainment > Humor > Parodies

So even though you're higher than me in sales ranking, my category rankings are much better.

How did I find these awesome categories? You won't like the answer - the answer, of course, is "spend money." I use Bestseller Ranking Pro (BRP), which is a great tool. You can find quality categories in like five minutes. But it's expensive. Check out the price for yourself, then after your jaw hits the floor, pick it back up and continue reading.

I'm not trying to shill for BRP. I think it's overpriced, and if there's another product out there that's cheaper, tell me, and I'll drop BRP immediately. But it does work. And it does have a money-back guarantee. You could get it, get the categories you need, then ask for a refund. Is that sleazy? Who cares? You gotta do what you gotta do.

If you don't want to do that, you can replicate what BRP does yourself - it'll just take forever. Go into these Top 100 lists and look at the sales rankings of the 1st, 50th, and 100th books. From there, you can determine which ones you can crack and which ones you can't.

For example, looking at "Vigilante Justice" just now, the #100 book has a sales ranking of 8,193.

By contrast, the #100 book in "Dark Comedy" has a sales ranking of 146,853.

See the difference? Even if you had a successful sale, it's unlikely you can even get into the top 100 in "Vigilante Justice" - and if you did, you wouldn't get far, because it only gets together as you climb the list. In "Dark Comedy," you'd surely beat 146,853, and could likely make significant headway.

For an even better example, look at my novel "Double Lives." It's #80 in Kindle Store > Kindle eBooks > Comics & Graphic Novels > Martial Arts, and the sales ranking is 312,842! It's very likely I could grab the #1 spot in this category if/when I have a sale - the current #1 book only has a sales ranking of 31,029.

But, since this data changes all the time, you'd drive yourself crazy trying to keep track of all the category fluctuations. Even "Martial Arts" isn't as lucrative as it was only a few months ago. That's where BRP comes in.

One final note: you may already know this, but don't worry about selecting a "bad" category. Amazon chooses the three best categories to put in the product details section. The others go to the bottom of the page. There's no downside to having too many categories - and you never know, a "bad" category may suddenly turn into a good one!

Hope all that helps, and isn't overkill. Any questions, just ask.

I went to a handful of therapy sessions over a decade ago, and I highly doubt I'll ever go to another one again.

Reasons:

1.) Therapists are all products of the middle class. High school > college > advanced degree > involved in a practice somewhere. They dress alike. They think alike. They have the same life experiences. It's impossible for them to relate to someone who isn't on the Middle Class Pathway to Success.

2.) Speaking of the Pathway to Success - their goal is not to help you achieve happiness or contentment, but to make you "a productive member of society." Which means: force yourself to work at a job you hate and force yourself to interact with people who are scumbags. Because life is about persevering!

Wouldn't it be great if a therapist said, "You really have trouble with society. Why don't you set up a homestead so you won't have to deal with all that?"

There may be therapists out there who say that, or something similar, but I've never heard of them.

3.) They whip out the prescription pad with a speed that would make a gunslinger gasp in awe. "Take this pill and leave everyone alone." No thanks - you're not gonna turn me into a zombie.

While I don't claim to have mastered my mental health, I think I'm in a great place compared to the past.

All you have to do is give the middle finger to society. Society has done nothing for me - why should I do anything for society? Why I should I bang on the metaphorical castle gate yelling, "Please, accept me!" when the people in the castle aren't worth two cents?

Why should I get involved in politics? There are two choices, Democrats and Republicans, and they both suck. At the state level or in the federal House of Representatives, there's a chance a third party or an independent candidate can get elected, but most of the time you get either a donkey or an elephant.

Once upon a time, it wasn't so bad. Politicians did things. They passed sweeping legislation. They built dams. Now the answer to everything is, "No." If something does manage to get through, it's some watered-down nonsense that the politicians of fifty years ago would've laughed at - or, some group that represents 0.001% of the population immediately sues and stalls everything.

Why should I try to climb the corporate ladder, where people are stabbing you in the back daily and telling an off-color joke gets you sent to sensitivity training?

Why should I follow current events? The media is laughable. I get better information watching the Phillip DeFranco show on YouTube than I do watching NBC Nightly News. It takes hours to get to the truth of a story, and if you explain your findings to people, they act like you're crazy. "That's not what Lester Holt said!"

Why should I volunteer? I've volunteered for hundreds of hours, mostly when I was unemployed. I've done my part. I'm no longer going to be a mule because "it's the right thing to do."

Why should I go to some Meetup group, or join some club or casual sports team? The people are all self-centered - no one is interested in developing lasting friendships, or even acquaintances. Well, they are, if you have the Accepted Image and Personality, which I don't.

Why should I go to college or some Adult Education course? I've been to college. Actually, I dropped out of college the first go-round, which was the best decision I ever made. Returning to college was the worst - well, returning to university was terrible. Community college is OK. When I finally graduated, I had a 3.6 GPA overall. Much wow. Much smarts. HAH! Yeah right. Any drone can get a similar GPA. It's all horseshit. Read, regurgitate, and forget. The "critical thought" colleges always talk about? Never experienced it. Any critical thinking ability I possess I developed on my own.

To return to the point: develop self-sufficiency. Keep 99% of the world at arm's length - you don't need them. You only need a few trusted allies. Forget everyone else.

Oh, and one more thing: I hate traffic. Stop texting and drive, dammit!

Mixed feelings about blogs. I hate writing them. I feel like the time is better used to produce saleable works. Also, wrestling with WordPress is a chore.

But if I do write a blog, I force myself to try my utmost, since a blog can, of course, lure someone to your books. For example, I read Joe Konrath's blog for years with interest and appreciation, then I finally got a Kindle and decided to give him a try. Got 35% through one of his books, then quit. Wasn't for me. I probably won't try another.

Your blogging can be phenomenal, but if your books are lackluster, you're not going to sell stuff. Goodwill generated from blogging or any other activities only goes so far.

Amy wrote: "I've got this far:

Fiction/Romance/Erotica
Fiction/Science Fiction/Space Opera

Clutching at straws with the Key words of

Genetic Modification
Science Fiction Adventure
Science Fiction & Fantas..."

kwfinder.com is a good website for keyword research - though you can only search three times per day unless you pay for a plan.

Don't think anyone's mentioned this: you can always email Amazon and ask for your book to be placed in certain browse categories. They're very obliging, in my experience. Unless you know the special recipe to throw into your book's categories/keywords section, this is the easiest way to get into some of the less competitive browse categories.

Read about it here:

https://mattcowper.com/2017/04/02/new...

I would skip the serialization, edit the novel, and publish it on Amazon.

Amazon has more reach than your blog - than ANYONE'S blog. Publishing stuff on Zon so their algorithms can find you is key. Keep throwing stuff up there, promote it, play with your keywords, etc. and you should make some headway.

I know you plan to publish whatever novel you choose eventually, but I think serialization is a step you don't need to take. You may get some views, but the time you spent serializing could've been used to market a complete novel.

"Apparently" rears its ugly head everywhere in my writing. I've tried to scare it off with truncheons, assault rifles, sugary pop songs played at high volume, and numerous other deadly weapons, but it's a bold beast, and keeps coming back undaunted.

After a greasy handshake that seemed to last eons – though, compared to the man in front of her, she knew nothing of eons – Helena finally retrieved her hand. She looked at it, expecting some sort of foul liquid to be dripping from her fingers and palm, but there was nothing but her own sweat. She swore she'd felt something revolting on the man's hand, but whatever it was, it had evaporated nearly instantly.

“I'm John,” the man said. His beatific smile reminded her of the zealous Christians she'd known long ago, back when her mother forced her to go to church. Hopefully he wasn't one of those nutjobs; last thing she needed right now was someone proselytizing to her.

“I'm...Lily.” No need to give this guy her real name – not until she knew what his angle was. The clerk glanced down at her credit card, reading the name, then narrowed his eyes, but he didn't blabber like an idiot and ruin her deception.

“Lily?” The man's smile devolved into a smirk, as if he'd seen right through her ruse – but only for a moment. Then the megawatt grin returned. “That's a lovely name.”

“Thank you,” Helena replied, trying to appear pleased.

“Sorry for eavesdropping, but it seems like you're having money issues.”

“I am,” Helena said, letting out a theatrical sigh. Act like a poor, helpless woman. Get some money out of him, just enough for a room for one night, then throw him a chirpy “Thank you” and be on your way. “If I could maybe, um, borrow some money, just enough for a room, it'd be a big help. I'd pay you back, of course. You can take down my contact information, and we'll get together tomorrow...”

“I'd love to help you,” John said, interrupting her.

“Thank you,” Helena said. “That's really kind of you.”

“As for paying me back – well, I have something...unconventional in mind...”

Of course. He wanted to sleep with her. Dammit, why were people so shitty? She shot a glance at the clerk. He was leering at her like she was about to strip right there in the lobby; he knew what John was proposing as well as she did.

“What do you mean, unconventional?” Helena asked coldly.

“I'll pay for your room, but first I'd like you to accompany me on the outing I've planned for this evening.”

It sounded so absurdly formal, she had to stifle a groan. “An outing to where?”

“There's an art gallery nearby. Very avant-garde. There's also a tiny cafe attached to the space, where they have poetry readings. I was going to soak in the rich textures of the paintings and then listen to some angst-ridden poetry.” He let out a “huhu” sound; Helena supposed he was chuckling. “Then again, isn't all human poetry angst-ridden?”

“I...I suppose,” Helena said, turning his offer over in her mind. It didn't sound so bad – if he stuck to art-and-poetry, and didn't try to woo her. She'd be careful – no drinking, no physical contact, no flirting. Just get through this crap, take his money, and get the room.

Then again, he could be planning to drag her into an alley and slit her throat...

Oh, stop being such a wimp, Helena told herself. Those sorts of things only happened in movies and novels. Besides, she had mace in her pocket, and she'd taken a few self-defense courses. She could handle herself.

"That's a fair trade," Helena said, nodding. "I'll join you, sure."

“Well then, shall we?” He held out his arm, and she had no choice but to hook hers into his. Physical contact already – not good. She tried to compensate by making her face rigid, clearly indicating she wasn't charmed by anything that was happening.

The clerk handed her useless card back and said, "Enjoy yourself, ma'am. There will be a room waiting for you when you get back." While his words were respectful, his tone was surly; he was clearly enjoying seeing this bitchy broad forced to jump through hoops for a few bucks.

John led her through the hotel's double doors, back out into the deluge. Luckily, though, he had an umbrella, which he seemed to produce out of nowhere.

“It's only six blocks away,” he said. “I know the weather's terrible, but you don't mind walking, do you?”

As if she had a choice. “No, that's fine.” Being back out in the rain caused a recent memory to flit through her consciousness. She cut her eyes over at John. Hadn't she seen him earlier? She thought so, but she couldn't be sure...

"A bookism is something like after dialog
"I don't like this," he hissed.

She suggested
"I don't like this." Mike clenched his teeth and let out a long breath."
---

Like Alex, I prefer the first option. Short and to the point. Plus, I love "hissed." At least one character should hiss in every novel you write.

The second one feels off. Clenched his teeth AND let out a long breath? When people let out long breaths, isn't it easier to do it with the mouth open?

Also, it's already been established he doesn't like whatever's going on; the clenched teeth and long breath just reiterate his anger.

If anything, combine the two: "I don't like this," Mike said, clenching his teeth and letting out a long breath.

Personally, I like to pair action with dialogue in this fashion - not always, of course. Every conversation is different.

"I don't like this," Mike said, grabbing Wesley by the arm. "What the hell's going on?"
---
"You threw them out the window in a fit of passion," Edna said, looking up exasperatedly from her knitting.

"I don't remember that," Horace said, staring at the window as if it had somehow hoodwinked him. "Do you think my memory's going?"
---

"Exasperatedly" is too clunky, I think, but you get the point.