22 books
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“
I was stuck back on “you can’t have two maids of honor” and therefore fighting back hyperventilation at the same time flashing pictures filled my head of a commando-style wedding; Hawk in black cargos, me in a white flak jacket festooned with lace. The picture of me carrying a bouquet of flowers and Hawk carrying an automatic weapon. The picture of me admiring Hawk’s huge-ass hunting knife. The picture of Hawk carrying me out of the reception in a fireman’s hold while bullets flew and flames cau
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Suddenly one day I sprouted boobs. Not *just* boobs. Enormous boobs. When puberty finally struck, I developed faster than a Polaroid. In my mind at least, I remember going to bed flat as a board one night and waking up with ginormous breasts the next morning. It was like, whoa, dude - this is better than the tooth fairy!
”
― Yours Cruelly, Elvira: Memoirs of the Mistress of the Dark
― Yours Cruelly, Elvira: Memoirs of the Mistress of the Dark
