Dorsaf’s answer to “Why was this trash published? every copy ever printed needs to be burned” > Likes and Comments
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i want to read it but i wanna know why people hate it..is it worth it?
You can't tell people what to read and what not to read. Also, you're pretty much romanticising abuse here. "Sometimes we need a brutal love to actually feel it."? Please seek help. Emotional abuse is not romantic and it's certainly not love and if you feel that it is, then you might need to change your perspective because this sort of 'love' is horrible and sad and you deserve better.
A brutal love is not love but a counterfeit love.
I loved the books and think that if you don't like it, then just don't read it. Its totally ok for us who enjoyed the book. S&M exists in this world, along with his issue of control, but like Dorsaf said, its about overcoming what he was accustomed to because he loves her. I am a woman and I don't find it humiliating or abusive. I think that he was controlling, but in the context of what he was (a Dominant), it IS what it is.
She never signed the contract, that is wrong. And that kind off contract is not binding, and it is also in the book. Did you understand that part off the book, did you acctually read the book?
Klas, I read all 3 of the books, so yes I understood the entire book. Please don't take this as a personal attack and don't call me out about my opinion. It is my opinion and I can read with an understanding. I did not speak to the entire response of Dorsaf, I spoke to the part that I wanted too, so get it together and step off. This is not personal but it sure as hell feels like you are taking it personally.
The fact in your opinion is totally wrong. Thats is my only point. You can read my review off the book,if you think I take your "opinion" in an antagonistic way. I do not.
Oh guys, you're right. This lifestyle/SM does exist. But thank God real BDSM has nothing to do with what is described in this book. Don't get me wrong, but am I right in thinking that you haven't known really much about the BDSM scene before reading this book? Because if you had, you would know that Shades of Grey gets BDSM dangerously wrong. If you really wanna know why so many people don't like the book - especially people from the BDSM scene - read this article: http://www.theatlantic.com/features/a... In my opinion, this is one of the best articles that have been written about Shades of Grey.
Do not fully agree, Kathi, but thanks for the link, I will read it. I think if you have a very shy person without any self confidence and a narcissistic person (adjacent to a psychopath) and ad bdsm to it, it will probably get a very bad outcome.
The book is very bad written though.
You may be right, Klas. And actually I agree with you, because I also think that Christian Grey is some kind of a psychopath. And that's one of the reasons why I don't really like the book/movie so much. It kinda gives people, who aren't really into the BDSM scene, the idea that people who like BDSM are an emotional wreck and that they need to "get cured" from their sexual preferences because they are dangerous.
Yes, and every platitude about gender roles is in the book, which also requires its debate. Still I found it fascinating to read, and I dont know why. Read it almost in one line over the weekend. As I do not understand my self, I my bee should not ask why the book have been so popular, still I have to ask that question, as it is a so creepy book. If this is what mainstream mainly read- sad then!
I do not think its about the sex, because I dont think it is even hot ore erotic, its mostly disturbing and for me I mostly wanted to throw the book in the wall reading that parts. My bee we sometimes nee to read som tickling shit and analyze it, to get over with it, but I dont think the majority off readers read the book in that critical way.
So to go on with the discussion is probably the only progressive way.
Thanks for your comments here Kathi, I appreciate them!
I am not interested in a woman being abused. I read the book mainly to understand why the book was so popular. Why women is so interested in a woman being abused, if you say so.
No I have not. Sorry, I can not help you with you´re ICK factor and I do no think I am responsible for any pictures in your head, except my avatar here.
Actually I think you can remove your worst though images, the worst part is not in the sex act in the book, its the rest off mr Greys staking and control behavior who is dangerous. Read the book.
21 is not really an age to make judgements about anything or to understand anything when your god-looking prince charming appears in front of you.
I expect Ann to be a little more sensible and get some brains intact.
don't like it don't read it?
You probably have to read the book before one can judge it as bad.
she actualy didnt sign the contract
i loved the book though
Putting aside the women image and relationship issues, the book itself is so poorly written. This lady does not have any writing skills (my opinion). I kind of read the first book (skipping many parts) and couldn't and did not want to read anything more from this writer. She simply can't write.
Eli Mell you are kind and generous. It is an insult to the english language as well as the intellect. When I think of George Elliot or Virginia Wolf I shudder at this EL James' total lack of writing skills. However in the money greedy world she has become a millionaire and for much of the present population that is all that counts.
Do your research. People who actually do practice BDSM have said that it's a horrible representation and that it amounts to abuse.
I actually really liked this comment (Dorsaf Bali) And if people say it's so bad then they don't have to do it. Christian said she could leave at any time.
What's so bad? The lifestyle? Couldn't care less, as long as it's safe, sane, consensual (this was none of those). Would you like a list of page references for all the times Ana tries to say no and Christian ignores her? What will it take to make you understand how inappropriate this book is? Did you know that women's shelters in the UK actually turned this book into toilet paper?
Obvious he doesn't ignore her becuase in the end he lets her go. And in the other two books they have a lot healthier relationship. This book isn't just abou the whips and beating it's about why he does it and how Ana helps him to understand it's wrong.
Write such stories on blogs but don't poison the literature by it
anything sadistic,manipulative and brutal is not ROMANTIC. in any way. you don't hurt the one's you LOVE to gain sexual pleasure. tsk. i think you need help,maam. seriously.
Forget the contents for a sec and judge the writing... it sucks
it is that crap that scares me...that message that, even if he makes you cry and feel humiliated; even if he makes you uncomfortable and tries to control your every move; don't hate him! he loves you and has a dark past, just put up with it and maybe one day he will change a bit and the rest of the shit you will get used to. just try and justify his assholish behavior (like when he said 'it was all your fault you almost got raped you should have stayed home like I said')! fake it till you make it or in the real world, get dead! or end up like that ex-mentally-deranged-sub who pulled a gun on you and then got stroked and undressed and bathed by the guy who loves you and doesn't let you have other guy friends. double standards are after all a good thing, why go for one when you can have two, if that logic works with shoes it should work here too.
What the ef is with the if u don’t like it, don’t read it crap... *rolls eyes, than thinks better of it for fear of getting knocked around* it’s because of the people who gave it a 5 star rating that I picked this piece of utter garbage up. Thinking public opinion is worth a damn. It’s not, the level of intelligence has surely diminished because the damn author couldn’t even spell right, have her book edited from all the ridiculous repetitions... it’s not trash and bad because of the *very bad example* of BDSM, some kink is allowed, but because the story is unbelievable and trash, the characters are shallow, boring and repetitive and to top it all off, it looks like it’s written by a fifth grader in primary school.
Dorsaf Bali did you actually read this book? Because I have read it fifty or sixty times and not once did I see that she signed anything...Just curious. I happen to prefer Grey and Darker from Christian's Point of View...that was written better. To slam Ericka, the editors, the story is a waste of time. She sold over 850 million of these books so somebody not only liked them...they don't give a s...t what the naysayers think. I know I don't. Other than the signature comment Dorsaf...I agree with your comment. (less)
I did see beyong the whole sex thing....the writing is atrocious. I was a better writer when I was in 3rd grade. How any publisher actually published this horribly written book is beyond my comprehension. Besides, you have to READ a book first before you know if you like it or not! DUH!
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Rasha
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Feb 14, 2015 07:49AM
i want to read it but i wanna know why people hate it..is it worth it?
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You can't tell people what to read and what not to read. Also, you're pretty much romanticising abuse here. "Sometimes we need a brutal love to actually feel it."? Please seek help. Emotional abuse is not romantic and it's certainly not love and if you feel that it is, then you might need to change your perspective because this sort of 'love' is horrible and sad and you deserve better.
A brutal love is not love but a counterfeit love.
I loved the books and think that if you don't like it, then just don't read it. Its totally ok for us who enjoyed the book. S&M exists in this world, along with his issue of control, but like Dorsaf said, its about overcoming what he was accustomed to because he loves her. I am a woman and I don't find it humiliating or abusive. I think that he was controlling, but in the context of what he was (a Dominant), it IS what it is.
She never signed the contract, that is wrong. And that kind off contract is not binding, and it is also in the book. Did you understand that part off the book, did you acctually read the book?
Klas, I read all 3 of the books, so yes I understood the entire book. Please don't take this as a personal attack and don't call me out about my opinion. It is my opinion and I can read with an understanding. I did not speak to the entire response of Dorsaf, I spoke to the part that I wanted too, so get it together and step off. This is not personal but it sure as hell feels like you are taking it personally.
The fact in your opinion is totally wrong. Thats is my only point. You can read my review off the book,if you think I take your "opinion" in an antagonistic way. I do not.
Oh guys, you're right. This lifestyle/SM does exist. But thank God real BDSM has nothing to do with what is described in this book. Don't get me wrong, but am I right in thinking that you haven't known really much about the BDSM scene before reading this book? Because if you had, you would know that Shades of Grey gets BDSM dangerously wrong. If you really wanna know why so many people don't like the book - especially people from the BDSM scene - read this article: http://www.theatlantic.com/features/a... In my opinion, this is one of the best articles that have been written about Shades of Grey.
Do not fully agree, Kathi, but thanks for the link, I will read it. I think if you have a very shy person without any self confidence and a narcissistic person (adjacent to a psychopath) and ad bdsm to it, it will probably get a very bad outcome.The book is very bad written though.
You may be right, Klas. And actually I agree with you, because I also think that Christian Grey is some kind of a psychopath. And that's one of the reasons why I don't really like the book/movie so much. It kinda gives people, who aren't really into the BDSM scene, the idea that people who like BDSM are an emotional wreck and that they need to "get cured" from their sexual preferences because they are dangerous.
Yes, and every platitude about gender roles is in the book, which also requires its debate. Still I found it fascinating to read, and I dont know why. Read it almost in one line over the weekend. As I do not understand my self, I my bee should not ask why the book have been so popular, still I have to ask that question, as it is a so creepy book. If this is what mainstream mainly read- sad then!I do not think its about the sex, because I dont think it is even hot ore erotic, its mostly disturbing and for me I mostly wanted to throw the book in the wall reading that parts. My bee we sometimes nee to read som tickling shit and analyze it, to get over with it, but I dont think the majority off readers read the book in that critical way.
So to go on with the discussion is probably the only progressive way.
Thanks for your comments here Kathi, I appreciate them!
I am not interested in a woman being abused. I read the book mainly to understand why the book was so popular. Why women is so interested in a woman being abused, if you say so.
No I have not. Sorry, I can not help you with you´re ICK factor and I do no think I am responsible for any pictures in your head, except my avatar here.
Actually I think you can remove your worst though images, the worst part is not in the sex act in the book, its the rest off mr Greys staking and control behavior who is dangerous. Read the book.
21 is not really an age to make judgements about anything or to understand anything when your god-looking prince charming appears in front of you. I expect Ann to be a little more sensible and get some brains intact.
don't like it don't read it?You probably have to read the book before one can judge it as bad.
she actualy didnt sign the contracti loved the book though
Putting aside the women image and relationship issues, the book itself is so poorly written. This lady does not have any writing skills (my opinion). I kind of read the first book (skipping many parts) and couldn't and did not want to read anything more from this writer. She simply can't write.
Eli Mell you are kind and generous. It is an insult to the english language as well as the intellect. When I think of George Elliot or Virginia Wolf I shudder at this EL James' total lack of writing skills. However in the money greedy world she has become a millionaire and for much of the present population that is all that counts.
Do your research. People who actually do practice BDSM have said that it's a horrible representation and that it amounts to abuse.
I actually really liked this comment (Dorsaf Bali) And if people say it's so bad then they don't have to do it. Christian said she could leave at any time.
What's so bad? The lifestyle? Couldn't care less, as long as it's safe, sane, consensual (this was none of those). Would you like a list of page references for all the times Ana tries to say no and Christian ignores her? What will it take to make you understand how inappropriate this book is? Did you know that women's shelters in the UK actually turned this book into toilet paper?
Obvious he doesn't ignore her becuase in the end he lets her go. And in the other two books they have a lot healthier relationship. This book isn't just abou the whips and beating it's about why he does it and how Ana helps him to understand it's wrong.
Write such stories on blogs but don't poison the literature by it
anything sadistic,manipulative and brutal is not ROMANTIC. in any way. you don't hurt the one's you LOVE to gain sexual pleasure. tsk. i think you need help,maam. seriously.
Forget the contents for a sec and judge the writing... it sucks
it is that crap that scares me...that message that, even if he makes you cry and feel humiliated; even if he makes you uncomfortable and tries to control your every move; don't hate him! he loves you and has a dark past, just put up with it and maybe one day he will change a bit and the rest of the shit you will get used to. just try and justify his assholish behavior (like when he said 'it was all your fault you almost got raped you should have stayed home like I said')! fake it till you make it or in the real world, get dead! or end up like that ex-mentally-deranged-sub who pulled a gun on you and then got stroked and undressed and bathed by the guy who loves you and doesn't let you have other guy friends. double standards are after all a good thing, why go for one when you can have two, if that logic works with shoes it should work here too.
What the ef is with the if u don’t like it, don’t read it crap... *rolls eyes, than thinks better of it for fear of getting knocked around* it’s because of the people who gave it a 5 star rating that I picked this piece of utter garbage up. Thinking public opinion is worth a damn. It’s not, the level of intelligence has surely diminished because the damn author couldn’t even spell right, have her book edited from all the ridiculous repetitions... it’s not trash and bad because of the *very bad example* of BDSM, some kink is allowed, but because the story is unbelievable and trash, the characters are shallow, boring and repetitive and to top it all off, it looks like it’s written by a fifth grader in primary school.
Dorsaf Bali did you actually read this book? Because I have read it fifty or sixty times and not once did I see that she signed anything...Just curious. I happen to prefer Grey and Darker from Christian's Point of View...that was written better. To slam Ericka, the editors, the story is a waste of time. She sold over 850 million of these books so somebody not only liked them...they don't give a s...t what the naysayers think. I know I don't. Other than the signature comment Dorsaf...I agree with your comment. (less)
I did see beyong the whole sex thing....the writing is atrocious. I was a better writer when I was in 3rd grade. How any publisher actually published this horribly written book is beyond my comprehension. Besides, you have to READ a book first before you know if you like it or not! DUH!
