I'm Not Worthy

I know. The name of the blog took you back to Wayne's World, didn't it? But that's not what I'm talking about. No, I'm talking about being a romance writer.

You see, each year, the congregation of which I'm a member has a daily Bible reading plan. Sometimes we read through the whole Bible. One year, we focused on the life of Christ. This year, our plan is called Wisdom University. We've been reading (or have read) Job, Psalms, Proverbs, Ecclesiastes and the Song of Solomon. If you read my books, particularly the McKenna's Haven series, you've probably already figured out I love the Psalms. I have yet to come across a situation in my life where there's not at least one Psalm that fits, whether it be one of joy and praise, one of sorrow and pain --it doesn't matter. It's in that book.

But this week, we've been reading in the Song of Solomon. As I read the words between the groom and his bride, I realize just how inadequate my own words are sometimes. The couple's love and desire for one another is impossible to miss. While our urban culture may not understand when he compares her hair to goats, even in our ignorance, we understand it means something to her. He thinks she's beautiful and sexy and desirable. The bride doesn't shy away from such language, either, making it clear that her desire is for him alone.

Another thing that's made clear throughout the reading is that this couple has refrained from the physical relationship until they're married. I'm always surprised, and a little disappointed, when I get a review on one of my books that says the reader was hoping for a little more "steam". One reviewer even said, point blank, that she wished there had been "S.E.X." (that's how she wrote it) in Not His Type because there was plenty of sexual tension. It speaks volumes about where our society is, spiritually, that a reader can't enjoy a book that doesn't include explicit sexual scenes. I have a very happy, healthy marriage -- I don't need to read about other people's sex lives! (Nor do I need to write them.)

So as I'm writing my sappy romances, I can't help thinking how much more beautiful are the words penned by a writer who was inspired by God, Himself. And I am once again humbled that He has blessed me with what talent I have, and that He's given me the avenue to reach people to share my belief in purity until after marriage. And in writing my sappy romances, I'm not worthy. But until the words dry up, until God stops answering my prayers with "yes", I'll keep writing.