I Feel a Contest Coming On...

Today I took a major step in my life, a step that explains my long absence from blogging. Mostly because I spent so much time hemming and hawing over whether or not I was making the right decision for myself and my family. Ultimately, I answered: yes, I was.

Today, I finished my last day of full-time employment at a corporation. Today, I became a full-time writer.

Today is a big day.

Of course, I've been a writer for a long time. And I've been a published writer since the day HEREAFTER was released. But before today, I hadn't yet decided to dedicate my career to writing. I hadn't taken the risk.

Writing, as we all know, is scary. It is hard, mentally exhausting, creatively challenging work. The publication process, too, is a roller-coaster of praise and punishment, as is the life of a published author. These are things I know and have experienced on a very personal level.

But to build my entire career on writing - something I love and respect and fear and crave so much? Well, that's a whole other ball of wax. It took a lot to get here.

So I'm challenging you to tell me the riskiest thing you've done for yourself - the moment you bet biggest on yourself . I'll choose the most daring, and that person will win a signed copy of HEREAFTER and a signed ARC of ARISE (when ARC's become available)!
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Published on October 07, 2011 14:16
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message 1: by Kelsey (new)

Kelsey Well Tara, I praise your bravery and determination. I was on my way to leave u a comment on when Arise will be release because I really miss Amelia and Joshua and I soooo want to read book 2. To my surprise, a lovely surprise btw I saw your post and said to myself perfect timing. I jump for joy and give u a standing ovation because not everyone has the guts to follow their dream, let alone make a decision so life changing. But I truly believe u did the rite thing and I know u'll reap only success and joy. In your post u said to tell u the most riskiest thing u've ever done. Well I don't know if mine is as risky as yours or any1 else that may comment. But, the move that I did that changed me forever is wen I decided to leave my ex. It's a long story but I'll try to be as brief as possible. My dad died when I was 10 yrs old, and well, my mom gave me up after he died (for reasons that are too long to say). My nana took me in and took care of me. But the scar and rejection from my mother never allowed me to grow up thinking of myself special or even pretty. I always thought that my mom hated me because I don't look like her, I look more like my dad (he was Puerto Rican). My dad was killed in a car accident and everyday I miss him and without a clue why I miss my mom as well. I don't hate her, in the contrary I love her and even pray for her wen ever I do decide to ask God for help I always throw in "and please take care of mom, amen." Nana gave me love, affection and everything I needed, she is what a mom should be. Love her to death. Ok I'm losing the point here, back to the story. In my senior year I met a really handsome guy that took interest in me, why? u may ask, well I have no idea. I never sought attention and being invisible was like my best quality, nobody notice me and I liked it that way. I always said to myself if my own mother hates me why will anyone else like me. My best friend is a freak, oh don't worry she likes being called that. She says it gives her power, LOL. Andrea is her name but she hates it, she likes Andie better. From the very beginning she told me that Mark (the guy I met) was no good, to wait that I will find the one. But Mark always said the rite things, treated me like no one else ever did so I fell for him and fell hard. He talked me into moving in with him after high school. So I did we both got summer jobs and everything started out great, I mean like a fairytale. I always wanted to study filming and directing. That's my passion and I got into the Seattle Film Institute which is one of the best schools in Seattle. Mark always wanted to be a photographer. He always took pictures of me, every time he got an idea he'd use me to make it come to life, then he'd use it at a photo shoot. After a year in college, I was really good @ what I do, I was being recognized for my short films and collaboration in other student films. I for once was being noticed and I liked it, I took it in well. Never letting it get to my head or change me. But Mark IDK he changed, he wanted me to drop out and help him full time. He wanted me to be more around. I loved him deeply and time with him meant everything to me so I always made sure that I was @ home before he got there, made dinner and did what needed to be done around the house. The weekend were ours, I dedicated myself to him. To me he was the one. But it wasn't enough. He became abusive verbally and physically and I always believed it was my fault. I believed it was me that was making him insecure because of my dedication at school. Anyways he changed entirely from the guy I once loved. I lost the passion I had for filming and directing. My grades hit rock bottom and I missed class a lot because of all the bruises. I didn't want him to get in trouble because of me. I stop talking and meeting with Andie because I knew she'd know as soon as she saw me. So I was all alone, being abused and feeling even worse than I ever did after my mom left me and my dad died. Fast forward, I found a note in Marks bag cleaning it out because it smelled like sweat and pee ugh... I can't get that smell out of my nose now. The note said that who ever she was, that she had a great time with Mark blah, blah, blah. I confronted him, he admitted he was cheating and not the first btw. I got so enraged that I started crashing things all over the apartment, screaming at him after everything he's put me threw and everything I've gave up for him, he pays me back like that. The last thing I remember is a white light. Mark had hit me in the head with those big lights that are used in photo studios. Thank God all I got was a bump that took three days to go down. The neighbors called the cops and they found me alone on the floor took me to the hospital. I woke up 6 hours later finding Andie there. Mark appeared with flowers saying he was sorry and that he wanted to change that he needed my help. I loved him so I took him back we moved to a different apartment and to my surprise things didn't change, it got worse the lies and the betting. One day after I woke up all sore from a horrible night of betting in and out of bed, if u know what I mean. Our relationship was just horrible. I mean it's not meant to be called a relationship, it was abuse, period. That day I woke up hating myself for changing the only man that loved me into this monster. I got so depressed I stopped eating, I didn't get out of bed for weeks, Mark was barely there, he stopped hitting me because I was so weak, I was literally bones. He convince me to take pictures of myself naked because he said it was reality in art. I felt good about myself because he was giving me attention and wasn't betting me. Andie hated visiting me, hated Mark, and hated seeing me the way that I was. It was her who saved me. She planned a trip for just the 2 of us, to my surprise she took me to Oregon to my father's tomb. She had bought flowers for him. I cried as soon as I saw the sign that said welcome to Oregon all the way to my dad's grave. She told me that my dad loved me but Mark didn't. She told me that only me can walk out still being me and become the woman my dad would've wanted me to be. But not what I was, a toothpick punching bag for a loser photographer. Rite then and there I did a pact with myself over my dad's grave that I was leaving Mark and finish what I started. We got back home and I left Mark, Andie helped me pack all my things. I didn't see him, he wasn't there. I left a note telling him I wanted to meet him @ a local coffee shop. That's when I broke up with him. Haven't seen him since, thank God. Went back to school, started reading again. I always loved reading it's what inspires me to do what I do. Mark hated that I read, he threw out all my books. He knew that's were my inspiration and passion comes from so I was prohibited to read. After I got on my feet after almost a year I've read so many books, happier than ever, and graduated early even though I lost so much time. Now I am truly living and loving my life. That's the choice that I did that changed me forever. I left Mark and became ME, Kelsey. Wish I'd done it sooner, LOL :D


message 2: by Heather (new)

Heather Windham Kelsey, I applaud your bravery.


message 3: by Kelsey (new)

Kelsey Heather wrote: "Kelsey, I applaud your bravery."

Thanxs :D


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