Stephen W. Hiemstra's Blog, page 179

Authentic Grief: Monday Monologues, September 2, 2019 (podcast)

Stephen W Hiemstra, 2018

By Stephen W. Hiemstra

This morning I will share a prayer and reflect on authentic grief.

After listening, please click here to take a brief listener survey (10 questions).

To listen, click on the link below:

https://t2pneuma.net/wp-content/uploads/2019/08/Authentic_Grief_Monday_Monlogues_20190902.mp3

Hear the words; Walk the steps; Experience the joy!

Authentic Grief: Monday Monologues, September 2, 2019 (podcast)



Also see:



Monday Monologue On March 26, 2018 



Other ways to engage online:

Author site: http://www.StephenWHiemstra.net, Publisher site: http://www.T2Pneuma.com.

Newsletter: http://bit.ly/TakingCare_2019

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Lament over Creation

By Stephen W. Hiemstra
 
Heavenly Father,
 
I mourn over your creation
that displays your glory,
but here on earth often seems
like flowers out of focus.
 
Why is the water unfit for drinking and the air neither fresh nor clear?
Do song birds still sing or have obese house kitties carried them away?
 
I miss the pleasure of gardening and hearing kids playing in the yard.
 
Yet, you are the God
that brings the sunshine and the rain that waters the land.
The dragonflies know your name and
even the stars and moon display your light.
 
Holy Spirit,
in your gentle wisdom,
restore balance to the heavens and earth
before our provision
becomes the stuff of myths and legends
long forgotten in a distance past.
 
In Jesus precious name, Amen.
Lament over Creation
Also see:
Prayer for Healthy Limits 
Other ways to engage online:

Author site: http://www.StephenWHiemstra.net, Publisher site: http://www.T2Pneuma.com.

Newsletter: http://bit.ly/TakingCare_2019

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Authentic Grief

For godly grief produces a repentance 

that leads to salvation without regret, 

whereas worldly grief produces death. 

(2 Cor 7:10)

By Stephen W. Hiemstra

About half of the patients I visited with in the emergency room during my time at Providence Hospital suffered physical maladies as a consequence of unresolved grief. Presenting diagnoses, such as backaches, strokes, heart attacks, failed psychiatric medicines, suicides, addictions, obesity, and head aches, often resulted from unresolved grief over the loss of a close family member. In such cases, treating the presenting ailment proved secondary to helping them cope with their loss.

American society does not cope with grief adequately. In a strong sense, we mask our grief with physical ailments to garner support that would otherwise be withheld. Supporting the grieving in their mourning can therefore promote both their emotional and physical well-being.

Godly Grief

The tension that we feel within ourselves when we mourn forces us to make a decision. Do we lean into our pain or turn it over to God? Standing under the shadow of the cross at Gethsemane, Jesus had to decide whether to be obedient to the will of God and proceed to the cross or to seek another future (Matt 26:42).

Because of the ubiquitous nature of pain and the decision it poses, our response over time to grief defines our character—who we become. It is interesting that grief is the only emotion that appears on the list of Jesus’ Beatitudes (Matt 5:4).

Widening Our View of Grief

Our grief arises out of the loss of the things that are important to us. In writing about the second Beatitude, Graham (1955, 20-26) identified five objects of mourning:

Inadequacy—before you can grow strong, you must recognize your own weakness;


Repentance—before you can ask for repentance, you must recognize your sin;
Love—our compassion for the suffering of our brothers and sisters takes the form of mourning and measures our love of God;
Soul travail—groaning for the salvation of the lost around us; and
Bereavement—mourning over those that have passed away.

Mitchell and Anderson (1983, 36-45) widen this list to identify six major types of loss, including: 1. Material loss; 2. Relationship loss; 3. Intra-psychic loss—loss of a dream; 4. Functional loss—including loss of autonomy; 5. Role loss—like retirement; and 6. Systemic loss—like departure from your family of origin.

What is surprising about this list is that each loss must be separately grieved. Elderly people find themselves experiencing many of these losses and grieving them surrounded by loved ones who may be completely unaware. But we all face losses in our daily lives that challenge the assumptions that we live by. With each of these events, we find ourselves in a “Gethsemane moment.” Do we surrender ourselves leaning into our pain or do we surrender our griefs at the foot of the cross and stay the course as disciples of Christ?

Ministering to Those in Pain

Do you give grieving people permission to grieve? Or do you try to sweep grief under the rug? VanDuivendyk (2006, 12) observes:

So many well-meaning friends and loved ones may try to cheer us up rather than just be with us in our sadness. Rather than help us grieve through and talk out our pain, they may attempt to talk us out of pain. Rather than be sojourners with us in the wilderness, they may attempt to find us a shortcut. Jesus openly cried over Lazarus and the widow’s son, and raised them both from the dead even though no words of faith were spoken (John 11:1-46; Luke 7:11-17), suggesting that we have permission to mourn rather emulating the stoics with their stiff upper lip.

Worden (2009, 39-50) sees the process of grief as divided into four tasks:

Accepting the reality of the loss,
Working through the pain,
Adjusting to a world without the deceased, and
Finding connection with the deceased while moving on.

The first task is to get beyond denial—a funeral with an open casket helps mourners get over the denial. The second task has to deal with the pain that may be accompanied by anxiety, anger, guilt, depression, and loneliness. The third task is to account for all the activities that the deceased shared with you and to find alternative arrangements. The fourth task is the re-evaluate your relationship with the deceased while moving on.

Unresolved grief—getting stuck in one of the tasks above—results in anxiety attacks and physical ailments when people refuse to honor their pain and are forced to pretend that it does not exist. American culture is complicit in promoting unresolved grief because co-workers, neighbors, and friends often give a grieving spouse or parent about two weeks before signaling that something is wrong if you are not over it. This is why it is important to give the grieving permission to grieve in the funeral to signal to their support group that two weeks is unlikely to be a sufficient period to complete the tasks of grieving.

References

Graham, Billy. 1955. The Secret of Happiness. Garden City, NY: Doubleday and Company, Inc.

Mitchell, Kenneth R. and Herbert Anderson. 1983. All Our Losses; All Our Griefs: Resources for Pastoral Care. Louisville: Westminster John Knox Press.

VanDuivendyk, Tim P. 2006. The Unwanted Gift of Grief:  A Ministry Approach.  New York:  Haworth Press Inc.

Worden, J. William. 2009. Grief Counseling and Grief Therapy: A Handbook for the Mental Health Practioner. New York: Springer.

Authentic Grief
Also See:



Value Of Life



Other ways to engage online:

Author site: http://www.StephenWHiemstra.net, Publisher site: http://www.T2Pneuma.com.

Newsletter: http://bit.ly/TakingCare_2019

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Sarah Hamaker: Capital Christian Writers Fellowship, Guest Blogger

Sarah Hamaker

Sarah Hamaker has two traditionally published nonfiction books (Hired@Home and Ending Sibling Rivalry), plus her stories have appeared in several Chicken Soup for the Soul books. Her first romantic suspense novel, Dangerous Christmas Memories, comes out in November 2019. She also won the 2015 American Christian Fiction Writers Genesis Award for romantic suspense. Sarah is a member of ACFW and the ACFW Virginia Chapter, as well as the president of Capital Christian Writers Fellowship. Sarah lives in Virginia with her husband, four children, and three cats. Connect with her at sarahhamakerfiction.com.

The Genesis of Capital Christian Writers Fellowship

A year ago, a group of local writers decided to launch a new nonprofit group dedicated to equipping and encouraging writers in the greater Washington, D.C., area. That sounds a lot more daunting that it was, because, in reality, it was a merger of two local writers groups: Capital Christian Writers and Northern Virginia Christian Writers Fellowship.

The new group, Capital Christian Writers Fellowship(CCWF) has a simple mission: To encourage one another in our writing endeavors and to educate writers, both fiction and nonfiction, on the craft and business of writing.

We hold quarterly meetings in Centreville, Virginia, on Saturday mornings with a time of education plus an hour for fellowship and networking. In months without a local meeting, we offer a weeknight webinar to provide learning opportunities from experienced professionals. We also will produce a writers conference about every 18 months in January and September. The next conference,Preparing for Publication, will be in January 25, 2020, in Annandale, Virigina.

CCWF is a nonprofit organization run by a board of directors, which are members of good standing. The board consists of the four officers (president, vice president, secretary and treasurer) plus the chairs of the marketing, technology and prayer committees.

So far, the response from our local community has been wonderful.

The entire group seems energized and excited about supporting one another in our callings as writers. I believe there are three things that make our group unique:

Our members write fiction, nonfiction, poetry, prayers, articles, journals, family histories, memoirs, and much more.
Our members are Christians who write both for Christian and secular audiences.
We pray regularly for one another and our writing.

Our members want to grow in their writing and faith, as the two are intertwined together. Together, we strive to bring the light of the Word into the world around us through our writing.

Why Join a Writers Group?

Writing can be a very solitary profession. While we can write sitting next to other writers, collaborating on the actual writing part can be extremely difficult—mostly because of the very personal nature of writing.

Writers groups provide writers with a community of people who get things like staring at a blank page and having nothing to say, and feeling like a failure when your work receives a rejection letter or bad review. Writers groups provide the balance to those times with

Encouragement
Education
Entertainment
Support
Fellowship.

If you’re a writer—or have aspirations to be one—I encourage you to join a writing community, whether it’s online or in person. Groups like CCWF are essential to bringing writers together and helping us to remember that while we write alone, we’re not alone.

Sarah Hamaker: Capital Christian Writers Fellowship, Guest Blogger
Also See:
How to Raise Readers by Sarah Hamaker, Guest Blogger
Hamaker Focuses on Sibling Rivalry—Much to Our Benefit 
Other ways to engage online:

Author site: http://www.StephenWHiemstra.net, Publisher site: http://www.T2Pneuma.com.

Newsletter: http://bit.ly/TakingCare_2019

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Interpretative Communities: Monday Monologues, August 26, 2019 (podcast)

Stephen W Hiemstra, 2018

By Stephen W. Hiemstra

This morning I will share a prayer and reflect on interpretative communities.

After listening, please click here to take a brief listener survey (10 questions).

To listen, click on the link below:

https://t2pneuma.net/wp-content/uploads/2019/08/Interpretative_community_Monday_monologues_20190826.mp3

Hear the words; Walk the steps; Experience the joy!

Interpretative Communities: Monday Monologues, August 26, 2019 (podcast)



Also see:



Monday Monologue On March 26, 2018 



Other ways to engage online:

Author site: http://www.StephenWHiemstra.net, Publisher site: http://www.T2Pneuma.com.

Newsletter: http://bit.ly/HotWeather_2019

The post Interpretative Communities: Monday Monologues, August 26, 2019 (podcast) appeared first on T2Pneuma.net.

Guidance Prayer

By Stephen W. Hiemstra

Merciful Father,

To you be the glory loving father for you illumine our path and peer beyond ever bend protecting us from unseen black-ice and pot holes and inebriated devils that threaten our very existence.

Forgive our habit of taking your provision for granted and acting as if we are in control.

Thank you for blessings beyond measure, the things and people we take for granted, and the luxury of being your people in a prosperous land.

In the power of your Holy Spirit, grant us eyes that see, ears that hear, and an abiding faith that our foot-steps would remain secure in a volatile time and place.

In Jesus’ precious name, Amen.

Guidance Prayer
Also see:
Prayer for Healthy Limits 
Other ways to engage online:

Author site: http://www.StephenWHiemstra.net, Publisher site: http://www.T2Pneuma.com.

Newsletter: http://bit.ly/HotWeather_2019

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Interpretative Community

By Stephen W. Hiemstra

The interpretative problem in ethics arises because every observer of an action may potentially explain the event differently. While pastoral training normally includes instruction in biblical interpretation, the ethical problem is seldom openly discussed and formal training, if provided, is handled as an apprentice activity. Biblical interpretation is, in some sense, easier because the interpretative context is fixed and, given enough effort, can usually be described. Ethical interpretation is harder because the context of an action may differ between observers and may be fluid in a society in philosophical transition.

Shooting Example

Let’s return for a moment to our shooting example.

The interpretative problem in ethics is complex enough that even experienced judges can get it wrong and books are written whose plot hangs on the interpretation. Suppose one man shoots another. Immediately, everyone wants to know details of what happened. Consider these questions:

Who were the men? 
What were their ethnicities? 
What was their relationship? 
What roles did they play? 
What was going on at the time of the shooting?
Has this happened before?
What was the motivation for the shooting?

Suppose a judge officiates the trial and a jury finds the shooter innocent (or guilty). What happens if the community riots when the decision is announced? In the case of a shooting, emotions may run wild, but every action is potentially subject to a similar conflict in interpretations.

The Church is an Interpretative Community

While the example of a shooting is pretty extreme, it makes the point that ethical interpretation is less a question of philosophy or individual accountability and more a case where the community plays an important role in interpretation. For Christians, the pertinent community is the church, but the church’s interpretative role arises primarily in teaching; the final word in interpreting events rests mostly with the state. When the church abdicates its interpretative role, state both determines and polices morality.

Key Role of the Bible

the Bible is a book written by adults for adults, yet as biblical illiteracy grows it is increasing obvious that the modern church treats the Bible as a book written primarily for kids. No one would actually say such a thing, but actions speak louder than words. Consider these observations:

Sunday school attendance is weak, particularly among adults, and books other than the Bible are often featured in small group study.
Even when Bible study is offered, video studies take the burden off leaders and participants to engage scripture deeply.
Churches often recruit young pastors with little life experience or biblical awareness with the primary entry point to ministry in many churches being youth group leadership.


Sermons have grown shorter to keep worship services no longer than an hour, often feature feel-good topics—God is love—rather than serving to teach biblical awareness or interpretation, and seldom ask listeners to do or remember anything.
When the Bible is neglected, spiritual disciplines tend to emphasize spiritual experiences rather than opening us up to receive God’s word for our lives and acting on it.

As biblical illiteracy within the church grows, the church increasingly serves as an interpretative community for particular ethnic groups, economic classes, or gender identities.

Interpretative Community
Also See:



Value Of Life



Other ways to engage online:

Author site: http://www.StephenWHiemstra.net, Publisher site: http://www.T2Pneuma.com.

Newsletter: http://bit.ly/HotWeather_2019

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Sarah Bolme: God in the Midst of Marketing, Guest Blogger

Sarah Bolme

Sarah Bolme is the Director of Christian Indie Publishing Association [1]. Through this organization Sarah provides assistance to small publishers and independently published authors marketing books to the Christian marketplace. Sarah is also the author of the award-winning book Your Guide to Marketing Christian Books.

God in the Midst of Marketing

I used to think that Marketing was a dirty word. The word dredged up images of dishonest car salesmen in my mind. A good friend of mine majored in marketing in college. I could not understand why anyone would actually want to make a career out of marketing.

If someone had told me that I would one day teach people marketing principles and practices, I would have laughed. Yet, today, I am engaged in the practice of educating and encouraging authors and publishers in marketing their Christian books. God truly has a sense of humor.

I stumbled into marketing. At least from a human perspective that is the way it seems. In reality, God led me into marketing beginning with a call to publish a set of board books about Jesus for infants and toddlers. From there he continued my path into marketing and eventually to helping others market their Christian books through co-founding and directing Christian Indie Publishing Association, through authoring a marketing book, and through teaching marketing seminars and providing consulting services.

Over the years, I have met numerous Christian authors who fall into one of two camps:

They think that marketing is a secular activity, and therefore they should not engage in it. These authors believe that if God has called them to write and publish a book, then he will supernaturally bring people to the book.
They think that marketing is a prideful activity, and since as Christians we are called to be humble, they should not put themselves forward in such a manner.

In reality, marketing is neither of these things.

Marketing Defined

The American Marketing Association (AMA) defines marketing as:

“Marketing is the activity, set of institutions, and processes for creating, communicating, delivering, and exchanging offerings that have value for customers, clients, partners, and society at large.”

A shortened version of this definition that I often use for authors is:

Marketing is any activity that you engage in that draws people’s attention to what you are offering.

Christian authors are not offering themselves to readers. They are offering their writings. Most Christian authors have written something that draws people’s attention to God—who He is and what He offers. In other words, Christian authors are in the business of “making disciples by showing people Jesus and teaching them to observe what Jesus has commanded.”

Marketing in Action

Christian books meet spiritual needs. Good marketing illuminates a need a person has and then shows them how what is being offered meets that need. Jesus, himself, understood this practice. Matthew 11:28-29, records Jesus as saying,

“Come to me, all of you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take up my yoke and learn from me, because I am lowly and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.” (CSV).

Here Jesus identifies the need: feeling weary and burdened. Then he offers a solution: his yoke that brings rest to your soul.

God uses people. He uses authors to write words that exhort and encourage others into deeper relationship with Himself. He also uses marketing practices to lead people to Christian books that meet their need for spiritual discipleship and a growing knowledge of God.

Footnote

[1] www.christianpublishers.net.

Also See:
Top 10 Book Reviews Over the Past 12 Months



Other ways to engage online:

Author site: http://www.StephenWHiemstra.net, Publisher site: http://www.T2Pneuma.com.

Newsletter: http://bit.ly/HotWeather_2019  

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Managing Change: Monday Monologues, August 19, 2019 (podcast)

Stephen W Hiemstra, 2018

By Stephen W. Hiemstra

This morning I will share a prayer and reflect on managing change.

After listening, please click here to take a brief listener survey (10 questions).

To listen, click on the link below:

https://t2pneuma.net/wp-content/uploads/2019/08/Managing_Change_Monday_Monologues_podcast_20190819.mp3

Hear the words; Walk the steps; Experience the joy!

Managing Change: Monday Monologues, August 19, 2019 (podcast)



Also see:



Monday Monologue On March 26, 2018 



Other ways to engage online:

Author site: http://www.StephenWHiemstra.net, Publisher site: http://www.T2Pneuma.com.

Newsletter: http://bit.ly/HotWeather_2019

The post Managing Change: Monday Monologues, August 19, 2019 (podcast) appeared first on T2Pneuma.net.

Crisis Prayer

Lansing, Michigan, 1983

By Stephen W. Hiemstra

Almighty Father,

Praise be to you oh Lord for you have covered me with you wings

even as my heart and mind have been weary and body fails me and

the sun’s heat bears down on me days and

cold winds whip about me through the night.

Forgive my weakness though it tears my soul and leaves me an embarrassment to my family and friends.

Thank you for your protection and comforting presence that remind of your goodness and mercy.

In the power of your Holy Spirit, grant me renewed strength,

that my joints and ligaments may bear my weight

as I strive to run the good race all the days of my life.

In Jesus’ precious name, Amen.

Crisis Prayer
Also see:
Prayer for Healthy Limits 
Other ways to engage online:

Author site: http://www.StephenWHiemstra.net, Publisher site: http://www.T2Pneuma.com.

Newsletter: http://bit.ly/HotWeather_2019

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