Emilie Richards's Blog, page 69

Sunday Inspiration: Father’s Day

I love this quote, which I found on the Barnes and Noble website, and it seems exactly right for Father’s Day. I hope today is filled with memories of good men who have been fathers or like fathers to you throughout your life. I’m glad we have set aside a time to celebrate and remember them, aren’t you?

From The Five People You Meet In Heaven, by Mitch Albom:

“Parents rarely let go of their children, so children let go of them. They move on. They move away. The moments that used to define them—a mother’s approval, a father’s nod—are covered by moments of their own accomplishments. It is not until much later, as the skin sags and the heart weakens, that children understand; their stories, and all their accomplishments, sit atop the stories of their mothers and fathers, stones upon stones, beneath the waters of their lives.”

Happy Father’s Day!

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Brainstorming Week

Since Sunday my brainstorming partners have been in residence at our cottage on Chautauqua Lake working on a variety of books. I always love this annual retreat because so many knots are untied and ideas are embroidered.

Tonight, though, I shake my head at how little I’ve accomplished so far, other than discarding what seemed like good ideas. No matter what, though, we are always reminded that the feedback we can provide for each other will be valuable all year. Even if we just save each other from bumping up against dead ends on our own.

So it will be a good week, no matter what. And I am always grateful to talk shop with such talented, insightful writers. Next week I hope to have a recap for you.

One thing we all marvel over? How exhausting this process is. With that in mind I’ll say goodnight so that tomorrow morning I’ll be ready to start all over again.

Sweet dreams.

 

 

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Sunday Inspiration: Do More

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Resurrecting the Past

While my new book, When We Were Sisters , explores the lives of two foster sisters who are slowly resurrecting the past they shared, in my own life, I’ve been doing some of the same.

Some of you know that we lost our beloved beagle several weeks ago. Nemo’s death was a surprise of the kind none of us want. Afterwards everywhere we looked there were sad reminders. Toys, collars, beds–and he had more beds than any dog could possibly use. Friends sent sympathy cards. The emergency vet clinic called to tell us we could pick up his ashes. We had to tell his pet sitter he was gone and experience the loss all over again. One night I dreamed about him and was jubilant because he was alive and I was sure I only dreamed that he wasn’t. Only, of course, I had that backwards.

All of us have experienced loss. Some of you have written to me about losing sons and daughters or spouses. No matter how hard we try we can’t prepare. The only thing we can do is remember that beginnings come with endings, and in between we need to let those we love know how much they mean to us. And enjoy them. Whenever and wherever we can.

This past week my husband decided that since we were about to make our annual trek to New York, he ought to go through the boxes and boxes of family photos and assemble those we want to scan and give to our children. In other words, explore those beginnings I mentioned.  He began that journey, and at first I just saw snippets. “Remember this? Doesn’t he look like. . .?”

The photos brought back memories, so many memories. The births of children. Other dogs we loved and eventually said goodbye to. Parents who are no longer with us. Life is a parade of events both sad and glorious, but a parade that marches on. It was a welcome reminder.

Eventually I began to sort, too, especially when he brought me a box of my own memorabilia, and just as exciting, two baby books I had kept for two of our children.

The baby books were particularly special because we believed we’d already given our daughter’s to her. We had given her other things, but not this. So that delight is still to come. Hers is more realistically an adoption book since she came to live with us at age six. But what a joy it was to go through and see the many, many things I’d kept. Her first drawing of her life in India and my notes beneath. Her story of India as she told it to us as her English improved from “Jingle Bells” to entire well-formed sentences, seemingly overnight. I found a letter from the Pan Am flight attendant who served as her chaperon. We may even have located her so we can write her all these years later and tell her how our daughter fared. Treasure, pure and simple.

The other book was a bigger surprise because I didn’t remember keeping it. Yet there was my youngest son’s baby book, chock filled with memories. Photos of his birth. Photos of him with his siblings holding him. Weight and height, and a wonderful collection of photos from the Montessori kindergarten he attended. The treasure is endless. Resurrecting the past can be precious. Sharing it with him will be even more so.

Then another surprise and another baby book. This one, my mother’s, tattered but still easy to read in the hand of a grandmother I never knew. Precious also were the letters from my own mother, carefully folded in a cigar box. I believe they may have been kept by an uncle, one of her brothers, and somehow made their way to me. They quite honestly record a moment in my life I have tried to forget. Our family, like far too many, began to dissolve when I started junior high school. But these letters were from a time when we were intact and at least on paper happy. And yes, reading these ordinary accounts of colds and confirmation classes and piano lessons, I remember those times and feel a warm glow. It’s a past I’m glad we resurrected.

In the rush of days it’s sometimes easy to forget that we weren’t always the people we are now. We’re made up of memories and feelings about them. Sometimes looking back is the right way to move forward. That was true for me this week. I found a sense of continuity and connection, just as my characters in When We Were Sisters, did.

I’m grateful.

Have you found a way to look back at your life that helps you? I love to read your comments.

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Sunday Inspiration: Overcoming Suffering

Helen Keller should know.

Born blind and deaf, she overcame more suffering than most of us can imagine, becoming one of the most inspirational writers of the 20th century. I’ve used her quotes before, and probably will again.

All of us suffer throughout our lives, but isn’t it amazing — bordering on miraculous — how much our lives are filled with the overcoming of suffering, thanks to family, friends, professionals, God — and ourselves?

Let’s try to recognize and be grateful for the healers in our lives. And I hope we can recognize our own healing effect on those we love.

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Six Things I Learned from When We Were Sisters

Yippee, it’s launch day for When We Were Sisters!

Today When We Were Sisters arrives at stores. Those of you who pre-ordered from online bookstores like Amazon or Barnes and Noble will probably find your copy in the mail or on your e-reader today.  I hope you enjoy it.

Would you like an autographed copy?

I have good news. I’ll be signing books at Bookstore One in Sarasota on Friday, June 3rd. If you can’t be there–and you will be missed–you can call the bookstore and order a copy for me to sign that night. They will charge postage, of course, but this is a great way to get a signed copy without flying all the way to Sarasota. Here’s the Bookstore One website with all the info. I’ll be signing between 6-7 PM.

So what did I learn?

I’m already hard at work on The Swallow’s Nest, next summer’s release. But as I write, the launch of Sisters is at the back of my mind. If you’ve read my novels you probably realize I’m one of those folks who sees a lesson in everything. So it’s no surprise that as each of my novels is published, I like to figure out what I learned from writing it.

For fun today, I’m going to share my Sisters list with you.

1–First person is more fun to write, but the book determines which point of view to use, not the author.

While I loved everything about writing my mystery series, Ministry is Murder, I loved it most because I could be directly in my amateur sleuth’s head. When the time came to write When We Were Sisters, I knew the story belonged to three characters, and I thought being directly in their thoughts would help give depth and insight. I took a chance and loved it. First person felt right from the first sentence to the last. I never had a doubt.

Fast forward? From the moment I began to plot The Swallow’s Nest, I was almost certain first person would be difficult if not impossible. As always I wrote my autobiographies in first to establish each character’s voice and personal story in my head. But when I tried the first chapter in first person–against my better judgment–it didn’t work. I rewrote it in third and it suddenly took off. Why? I’d be happy to tell you if I understood completely. I can tell you that not all the characters are going to be easy to sympathize with. A little distance will help.

2–Readers will bring their own experiences to your novel and like or dislike it for their own reasons.

Even though the book just came out I’ve already received some interesting reviews. As you’ll learn the story follows the lives of two foster sisters who have remained close in adulthood. But foster care and the welfare of children is a loaded subject. I’ve received several reviews that laud the even-handed way I explore the topic. I’ve received one that claims I’m on a soap box against the evils. Which is true? Readers bring their own life experiences, values and opinions to every book. Authors do, too. Here’s one of mine. I’m an adoptive parent, and my own daughter spent her early years in an orphanage. I will always be grateful to the nuns who took such excellent care of her. Good foster parents can’t be praised too highly.

3–Some things are worth fighting for.

I explored this subject in earlier blogs. I went to the mat to get a cover that I felt conveyed the story and drew in readers. (I got one.) But even though I was convinced my original title was great, I was disabused of that notion immediately. Luckily I saw my editor’s point. In the next weeks I tried to remain patient as my other “good ideas” were shot down. Then I came up with When We Were Sisters, and all of us liked it best anyway. I was smart to back off of one and continue to flog the other.

Psst. . . . Want to know the first title? Life After Love–from a Cher song. My editor said it sounded like a book about becoming a widow. I had to agree. When I told her next time I would write a book about a widow so I could use it, she said the title was still too depressing. And you know, she’s right.

4–Editors and trusted friends can spot what an author overlooks.

When I blogged last week I mentioned that my editor thought Cecilia might be the most interesting character in the book. Because she did I was more aware of Cecilia’s role in the story, and that definitely brought the book to life. I didn’t mention that after reading the final version my good friend author Diane Chamberlain suggested ramping up the tension in one spot. She was exactly right. Both times trusted pros gave valuable feedback. And let’s not forget my brilliant brainstorming buddies, who were in on this one from the beginning. I’ll be meeting with the group again in a week. Can’t wait!

5–Asking readers to help gets great results

This is the moment when I thank my Krewe of Review, a wonderful group of readers who gives me advice, reads my books and writes reviews to help other readers find them. And no, I do not tell them what to say.

6–There’s more than one way to promote a book.

While I’ll be doing tried and true book signings here in Sarasota and later in Palm Beach, I loved trying other things, most notably the When We Were Sisters playlist. I hope you’ve had a chance to listen.

Every book feels special, but some are harder to let go of than others. You know this as a reader, and I’ve learned it as an author. I’ll miss When We Were Sisters, but it helps to know it’s in good hands now. Enjoy, and let me know what you think.

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Sunday Inspiration: We honor the dead…

Before we moved to Florida we lived in Arlington, Virginia, and our home was only a few miles from Arlington Cemetery.

I visited when a friend or family member from the military was laid to rest, and I was always shocked by how beautiful a place it is, the rolling hills of green lawns and majestic trees and row after row of white tombstones.

It was hard to imagine all the men and women who were buried there, so many of them having their lives cut short by war. It’s been said that, “Heroes don’t wear capes. They wear dog tags.” So true. And I mourn them all this Memorial Day.

I agree that though we need to honor the dead, the greatest honor we can bestow upon them is to treat the living well, giving all people the opportunity to live productive and free lives. And when we do that, perhaps war will no longer be necessary.

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When We Were Sisters: The Playlist

As I write this blog Alicia Keyes is singing Girl is On Fire on my computer, but no, wait, now it’s Hell on Heels by the Pistol Annies. And I happen to know that Katy Perry is about to sing Roar, a fabulous spoof on all those Tarzan movies I grew up with.

Why, you might ask? What do all these songs have in common?

The answer? All, every one of them, might well have been written for When We Were Sisters. And because I found them as I researched the novel and listened to popular music for inspiration, I want to share this special YouTube playlist with you today.

Novels grow much like children do. We envision what they’ll be before they’re born, their perfection, their depth, their beauty. Then the cute little boy we dreamed about is born with ears that stick straight out and a Houdini-like ability to escape from his crib, house and later, from every plan we made for him. He is born his own person.

And so it is with novels.

So what’s the book about anyway? And who?

When I began When We Were Sisters my editor said that Cecilia sounded like the most interesting character, and she hoped I would pump up her story. Of course–like the little boy–I nodded sweetly and ignored her. At least more or less. I liked Cecilia just fine, but I was convinced this was Robin’s book. Then, as the novel took on a life of its own, Cecilia emerged, without my telling her to, as possibly the most important character of all, and I fell in love with her. I have an excellent editor, don’t I?

I also fell in love with popular music.

Before I began Sisters my musical tastes were varied, lots of classical, rhythm and blues, sixties and seventies soft rock, a little country here and there. But the music that’s popular today wouldn’t have been on my personal list. Then I began to listen, because, after all, this is Cecilia’s world.

I was hooked.

Music can tell a story, too.

Now join me for an exploration of the story through music Cecilia would sing, or at least songs that she or the other characters would feel a strong connection to. Every song has a special meaning. Some are even mentioned in the story.

The YouTube Playlist has a description at the top, but let me tell you a little more here.

Tough and Mother’s Day, by Kellie Pickler are songs that Cecilia would identify with. She had to be tough to survive, but at the same time she yearned for the mother who abandoned her. Cecilia does not sing country, but country lyrics tell stories better than any other, and these are no exception. Both songs are based on Pickler’s own life. BTW, if you’re an American Idol fan, Kellie Pickler finished 6th on Season Five. The top five must have been fabulous, because she certainly is.
The next four songs are the kind that Cecilia becomes famous for, take-no-prisoner songs about women standing up to men. I had so many to choose from. You’ll hear Girl on Fire by Alicia Keys, Hell on Heels by the Pistol Annies, Roar by Katy Perry (be sure you WATCH that one), and Fighter by Christina Aguilera. I included that last because I could imagine Cecilia singing it but also performing it much the way Aguilera does in this New Orleans live concert.
I Will Survive by Gloria Gaynor is mentioned in the book, and Cecilia says it might as well have been her anthem. I Will Always Love You by Whitney Houston is also mentioned when Cecilia warbles the first few lines to Robin. What a voice and what a talent. I’m sad we lost her so young.
In between those two is Celine Dion’s gorgeous ballad Because You Loved Me. I was looking for a song to express the bond Cecilia and Robin have had since childhood when I heard the line: “You were my voice when I couldn’t speak.” Cecilia was Robin’s voice when the little girl was too frightened to say anything.
Robin and Kris are separated by miles and by differences of opinion about their marriage. Both Talking to the Moon by Bruno Mars and Missing You by Steve Perry express their yearning for each other perfectly.
There’s another love story in the novel, and All of Me by John Legend and One and Only by the magnificent Adele express that romance so perfectly, I don’t want to give anything away. I will say that when I heard All of Me for the first time I stopped the car to write down the title and performer. Quite possibly it’s my favorite love song, although the next one is a close second. By the way, One and Only spurred me to create this playlist. I fell in love with Adele and the song and realized there had to be more songs that expressed sentiments in the novel. I went looking.
Finally Annie Lennox’s Universal Child is a plea directed at the world to remember the plight of children worldwide, those who are abused, hungry, and in danger. They are universal children. They belong to each of us. It’s fitting that she performs it here, in the National Cathedral in Washington DC.

Once again. You’ll find the link to the playlist here, on YouTube. You can load it on your computer, your smart phone or tablet. The whole playlist runs just short of an hour. You can simply listen or watch or do a little of both. You can skip songs, go back and listen again to the ones you love the most, and generally enjoy yourselves.

I really wanted to share this with you because creating it meant so much to me. I think the playlist conveys the real heart of the novel. I hope you’ll think so, too.

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Sunday Inspiration: The Blessing of Pets

Nemo, our beautiful Blue Tick Beagle, left us this past week, and we miss him very much.

For nine years he was a joyful and healing presence in our lives — though also a trial from time to time. Nemo was rescued from the path of a bush hog as an abandoned puppy by our oldest son who passed him on to us as soon as he could eat and drink again. Possibly because of that start, or more likely because of his beagle genes, Nemo was fond of any passing bits of paper, of stones and sticks and anything he shouldn’t eat. Our vet, on examining a Nemo X-ray, said that Nemo had swallowed not a rock, but a rock garden. I once had to call a community center that reimbursed me for travel to a speaking engagement to announce that Nemo had eaten the check and would they mind reissuing it?

Nemo was generous. He was fond of offering his favorite toy, blanket and even his bed to anyone he loved, and he loved everybody. We never won a staring contest and his big beautiful eyes revealed a remarkable beagle soul. His passing reminds me of what a blessing our pets are.

My husband Michael — also known as Proman and the Reverend McGee — made a video for our church website a few years ago about the blessing of pets, using Nemo as his model. I assure you Nemo was never as well behaved as during this video, probably because Michael petted him the entire time. Michael edited the video down to less than a minute, so I hope you will take the time to watch it and then give your pet some extra attention today as thanks for being such an important part of your life.

If you would like to share your own pet stories, we’d love your comments. Is there or was there a pet in your life who changed it irrevocably? Nemo and the dogs (and occasional cat) who passed on before him, have all changed ours.

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When We Were Sisters: Cecilia Speaks

In preparation for the launch of When We Were Sisters on May 31, join me for brief excerpts from the autobiographies of the three major characters, Robin, Kris and Cecilia.

Cecilia: We’ve heard from Robin Lenhart and her husband Kris. Today Cecilia tells a little of her story. Cecilia clawed her way to the top of the music scene to become an internationally famous singer-songwriter. But neither fame nor fortune have been enough. She’s close to only one person, Robin, her foster sister, and now, after a very private breakdown, she realizes she must go back into her past with the one person who shared it with her, and put an end to secrets before she can finally heal.

***

In Cecilia’s Own Words:

Childhood Memories: Until I was nine the names of my mother’s “boyfriends” changed regularly, along with the dirty little towns with their dirty little rooms where we lived. So did the amount of time I was left to fend for myself until the day that the cops removed me from a rat infested apartment in Tampa where my mother had been shacked up with her dealer and pimp.

I say “had been” because by then I hadn’t seen either of them in days. There was no food in the apartment and after two hungry days the lady next door–no great shakes herself–had the decency to call the cops when she saw me drinking rainwater from a saucepan I’d put outside to catch it.

I never saw my mother again. Of course given Maribeth’s record with men, that boyfriend probably left her not long after that, either. By that point she was too far gone to keep men who wouldn’t support her voracious drug habit. I suspect he abandoned her right after they both abandoned me.

When she was still around and happier, she often hung out at bars. She took me with her, always finding a way to get me. At age five I started my career in one of them. Maribeth told me to sing, so I sang something I’d heard on the radio–no matter how miserable the places we lived were, we always had music blaring. Everyone applauded and a couple of men gave me dollar bills. Maribeth figured she was raising a little gold mine, and we repeated this performance any time we could.

I liked the attention, and she liked the money. These days I like both.

***

Robin Enters My Life: I had my first and best lessons in the intricate art of survival from Maribeth, but somehow I remained hopeful.

I’m not sure why. God knows I had no reason to hope during those early years. But even when I stopped believing Maribeth would change, I still believed that life might.

Before we left the coal patch where I was born, my grandparents told me that God wanted me to be happy and would help. I held on to that for a long time until I figured too much time had gone by, and God had simply lost track.

I’m not sure how I would have turned out if Robin hadn’t entered my life. I was thirteen, but she was just nine, the age I was when I entered foster care. She was pathetic. Robin had lived with her grandmother since birth–her mother having deserted her at a young age, too–and the old woman had been cruel and calculating.

Just as I didn’t miss Maribeth, Robin admits she never missed Olive. We are walking, talking examples why foster children should never be put in boxes. One size does not fit all. Both of us learned early that love would never be returned by the women responsible for us, and so we guarded against feeling anything for them. When they disappeared, we had our first real chances to be taken care of.

Nobody had ever really needed me except Maribeth. This sad little sparrow of a girl, this colorless, quiet-to-the-point-of-disability child, needed somebody to help jump start her life. I figured I could do that.

***

Moving On: In a rare personal moment after I fell to pieces during an international tour, I told Donny, my manager and friend, about my past, about the foster homes I had been in and the awful predicament some foster children face.

I’ve always given heavily to children’s charities. I’ve always dropped everything to help children when I could. Not all of this was news.

When Mick Bollard, one of the best documentary filmmakers in the business, asked me to participate in a documentary about foster care, Donny, in his grave, thoughtful way, suggested I not only do it, that I let Mick follow my personal story, the good, bad and ugly. Was it time to face my past and put it behind me?

Donny helped me free my schedule, and now the documentary is about to become reality. Donny has promised to be with me every step of the way. I just hope Robin will leave Kris in charge at home and come on board, too, because this was her life, as well. Maybe the trip will help us both.

Or maybe it will destroy us.

***

I hope you’ve enjoyed these peeks into the lives of the characters of When We Were Sisters. Writing autobiographies helps me know my characters, and since they speak directly to me, I learn their voices, too. Of course I’ve only shared what amounts to “prequels” to the novel here, because the book begins where these excerpts end. 

Next week, in honor of Cecilia, fewer words and lots of music! Come back Wednesday to see what I mean.

Click here for bookstore links.

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