Rani Divine's Blog, page 30

Back it up

For the finale in our series, I want to talk about something a little more obvious than the last two. It’s something that you all know is important, but yet something that I feel should be reiterated, in any case. It’s one of those things that we all struggle to work on, both because it can be boring and because it can be the most fascinating part of the story-writing process.
Why do we need…Backstory?
For our purposes, today, I’m talking both about character’s backgrounds and the background of your story in general. What’s been going on around your story? What’s your character been through up to this point? Things of that nature, which some say can really drive a story forward, and really make something of them.
From the point of view of a reader…
I like when I can tell how much thought and effort a writer has put into their story. It makes the story that much more worthwhile, to me. It’s more interesting, because I can see how attached they were to this world, to their characters, to go to the point that they even thought through the tiniest details in the whole of the story, even to note the type of grass growing in the backyard, and why that was important to the man who built this house in the way back when’s. I want to see that you’re having fun with it, and that you’re understanding your story as much as I’m understanding it. Make me see it like you see it, feel it like you feel it, and follow it like you follow it. Your readers will thank you. Promise.
From the point of view of a writer…
If you’ve read Telekinetic, then you might know that I really enjoy adding a short prologue of information on the background of the story. I really like to know all that stuff, to have it all as a reference while I’m writing, because it helps me make sure that I’m not accidentally creating a character who could not thrive in this world, or creating a world that would literally kill my character. It’s something that you haveto think about, and probably before you actually start your writing. I’d recommend sitting down and getting at least a few notes down onto a page, and then you can start the actual story. Otherwise, you’ll just end up getting confused and making a mess. Trust me, I’ve been there.
From the point of view of an editor…
Similarly to both the above, I really just want to know that you know your stuff. If I can tell that you’re a little iffy on your backstory, even for a single character, it makes me wary about your skill as a whole. I want to see that you know what you’re doing, that you know your characters and your world, and that you don’t need someone else to come in and help you make sense of it all. I don’t want to have to explain your story to you—that’s probably the best way of putting it. Please, don’t make me have to do that.
You need a backstory, and you need to know it. Simple as that. Without one, your story will suffer, as will your editor.
;-)
[love]
{Rani Divine}

Ritual

Monday we talked about mythos, and so the logical progression, at least for me, was to then talk about religion. Some of you will say that they’re the same thing, and I’m here to tell you that you’re wrong. Mythologies are stories, religions are things that we all have, things that root us in our lives. Your routine is your religion. And so now, we must ask,
Why do we need…Religion?
Like I just said, it’s your routine. Religions are things that we all have. Some of us religiously watch football or baseball games. Others go to church and say our prayers. Most of us get up in the morning, brush our teeth, and get on with our day. Yeah, that’s a religion too.
From the point of view of a reader…
It’s interesting to me, to see what authors come up with in this category. Religions in the traditional sense, as in Christian, Buddhist, etc., while interesting, can get a little bit old after a while, if nothing ever happens to make it a real point of the story. But, religiously doing things, like a character in a war, one who religiously touches a pendant on their neck whenever someone dies, can be really intriguing. Why this pendant? What does it mean for them? What would happen if they lost it? There’s a lot of interesting things to cover in there, certainly.
From the point of view of a writer…
I really enjoy playing around with religion in story. That should be pretty obvious by now, if you’ve read any of the Druid Novels. But at this point, I’ve also played around with religious actions in some of my other, not yet released, novels. I find it a lot of fun to create religions in a story, to have something that really unites a certain people in their belief, and then to put one of those people next to someone who doesn’t have any sort of faith at all. It’s also interesting to put a character with a ton of religious tendencies next to a character who throws caution to the wind. Lots to be played with, and lots of reasons why it shouldn’t just be ignored. It’s a part of who people are, as a whole, and so it’s something that we can’t glaze over in our stories.
From the point of view of an editor…
I like to see that writers are exploring a lot of angles, including religion. I like to see both sides of it, characters who are religious and those who aren’t, but I also like to see religion as a hierarchy. There are a lot of interesting plots to be explored in the realm of religion, and if you can come up with something completely unique, something to make me awe, then you’re someone I certainly want to work with. But if you’re someone who’s figured out the ins and outs of their chosen religion, someone who’s willing to really get in there and get in-depth with what you’re doing in the story, then I want to see more from you. I want to work with you, right here, right now. That’s how big this theme can be, in the grand scheme of things.
So, let’s get religious.
[love]
{Rani D.}

Myth

Well friends, this is it. We’ve reached the final week of our series. So, I’ve picked out there very important topics, and two of which you might not have thought of right away, when I first started this series. Surprise topics are great, aren’t they?
Why do we need…Mythoi?
Now, just in case you’re wondering, mythoi are basically mythologies, stories, things that we can build off in stories—and no, not just in fantasy stories. Mythology actually plays a large part in nonfictional stories as well as fictional ones, and they really do a lot for making a story seem that much more real, if I’m being honest.
From the point of view of a reader…
Mythology is a form of detail that we don’t get a ton of in most stories these days. I really like when it’s one of the first things defined, or when it’s the vein that’s holding a story together. Myths and legends can really play a huge role in how stories play out. Like with Ted Dekker’s Circle series, there’s the histories that run a huge vein through the whole series and link it all together, but no one can really prove that it’s happened. That, to me, is a huge draw for reading a story. I have a hard time putting books like that down.
From the point of view of a writer…
Take the Druid Novels, for instance. They all have a running theme, a running mythos, and if you’re paying close attention, you’ll notice that the same mythos is running through every book in a different way. That, to me, is the whole fun of mythology. It’s great to play around with, to tweak to suit your needs, or even to create to formulate your story. Whatever you’re doing with it, as long as you think it through all the way (preferably before you start writing), you’ll have potential for a really great story.
From the point of view of an editor…
If you can create your own mythos, and make it as seamless and fluid as your story needs it to be, you’ll impress every editor who reads it. Even if your story isn’t one that we want to work with, you’ll still impress—and that’s a good thing to do. If we like you but we don’t want to edit your work, chances are we know another editor who would be better. And if you’re using an actual mythology in your story, one that exists in the real world, then I want to see that you’re an actual authority on it. Do your research. Write it well. You’ll impress just as much as someone who made up the whole thing.
Myths are a part of life, aren’t they?
[love]
{Rani Divine}

Ad

As the week comes to a close, I have a topic that’s maybe not so obvious to you, or maybe so obvious that you didn’t even think of it. Which is why I added it to the list, because a lot of people seem to be struggling with knowing exactly what to do with them lately, and I thought we could all use a little mini discussion on the subject.
Why do we need…Adjectives/Adverbs?
Should be pretty obvious, right? It’s so we can more adequately describe a situation or a thing, an action or an object. And they’re extremely important. But with the onslaught of the “Show, Don’t Tell” movement, many writers (and even readers) have gotten a little confused on what we should be looking for, when it comes to these descriptors.  
From the point of view of a reader…
I like detail. We’ve been over that before, back in our first week, if I’m not mistaken. But that detail comes through words like these, adjectives and adverbs. They’re ones that a lot of writers have taken to cutting out of their writing, to the point that I sometimes have to make up what a thing looks like, what it feels like, how it sounds… and I don’t want to have to do that. People will tell you that I like to do a lot of that myself, as a reader, but it’s not true. I want you to tell me what your world is like, and I want to experience it. That requires words like these.
From the point of view of a writer…
I’m a descriptor fanatic. I use too many of them, in my opinion. I’m working on that. Just like the reader version of me, I like to show a lot of detail in my writing. Readers want to know what my world looks like? Well, I’ll tell them! I like to string a few adjectives together, or give an adverb here or there to tell you exactly how something is playing out. In my opinion, it gives a better feel for the story as a whole, and for what’s going on. I like them. Please don’t cut them all out.
From the point of view of an editor…
I’m sure you’ve all heard of the “Show, Don’t Tell” movement, so I won’t bother to explain it. But somewhere along the way, everyone got confused on what that meant. I’ve seen it both ways, that showing means to use all the descriptive words, and that telling means to use the descriptive words. Well, here’s the thing. Throw that whole “Show, Don’t Tell” crap out the window and write the way you want to write. No, I take that back. Write what you want to read. Chances are, that’s a pretty interesting story, and a pretty interesting way to write. Some of you, I’ll ask to add more description. Others, I’ll tell to cut it. But please, whatever you do, don’t cut them all out. Don’t limit your descriptions because you’re confused about this movement. That, to me, is a writing sin. Don’t commit it, and I won’t have to scold you when you send me your work. Not that I would scold you anyway, but I would sit you down (over a cup of tea, perhaps) and explain why you need to work on this.
The moral of this story? It’s not a bad thing, to describe what you’re talking about.
Have a great Memorial Day weekend, everyone! I'll be back on Monday with another post!
[love]
{RD}

Run!

Today, I have a logic bomb of a topic for you. Seriously. Read-on and you’ll understand. It’s the most logical flow I could’ve taken, considering what we talked about on Monday.
Why do we need…Run-on Sentences?
See? I told you. Monday, we talked about fragments, and why in the long run they can actually end up helping your story. So today, I’m talking about their opposite. Well, basically their opposite. English is bad about opposites, a lot of the time. At least, in grammar. We’re a little weird like that.
Moving on.
From the point of view of a reader…
I like a good run-on sentence, when it counts. It can be punchy, or weird, or show the chaos of any given moment, and that’s what makes them so cool to read. I’ll admit, once again, that if they’re everywhere they can get annoying pretty quickly, but I’ll also admit that when they’re used right, they’re so freaking cool! Like fragments, they draw attention to themselves. But unlike fragments, they’re really good at making your brain drone a little bit, and making a reader’s heart pound harder and harder until they get to the end of the sentence and find out what’s it’s leading to. Definitely something I look for, in a good book. Yeah, I realize that’s a weird thing to look for.
From the point of view of a writer…
There’s a book I wrote, I can’t tell you when it’ll be out because I have no idea, but I used run-on sentences to highlight that the character in question could not figure out what was going on or make any sense whatsoever of her surroundings, and I’ve gotten nothing but positivity out of my beta readers, in response to scenes written like that. Proof that they can be used properly, without any negative effects on the readers, convincing them to put the book down. We want them to keep reading, don’t we?
From the point of view of an editor…
Similarly to fragments, I really just want to see that you know how to use your sentences. Run-ons can be used to your advantage, but they can also be a sign of a writer who doesn’t know how to close a sentence. So, make sure you’re only using them when you need to, when it’s important to do so, and not when it’s just because you’re not sure how this sentence should end. Make sure you know your craft, all the way down to your run-ons. If you know that, you'll be a step ahead of the pack, let me tell you.
The moral of the story, once again, is that run-ons are not the enemy.
[love]
{Rani D.}

Defrag?

Happy Monday!
Thank you to everyone who’s already ordered Dwr, and to those who have started (or finished) reading! You are all such a blessing to me, and I’m so happy to get to share this next episode in the Druid Novels with you!
This week, we’re getting back into our series. Fortunately for you, it doesn’t take me long to get back into the groove with things like this. So let’s just jump right in…
Why do we need…
Fragments?
Yes, yes, I know, your teachers in school probably all taught you that fragments are of the devil and must be purged from all writing. I know. I was taught that, too. Fragments were to be avoided at all costs, and I do very nearly mean all costs. But you know what? It’s not as big a deal now as it used to be. And you know what else? We’re talking about fiction and nonfiction novel and short story writing, not academia. So, deal with it.
Moving on.
From the point of view of a reader…
I’ll admit it. Fragments can be annoying, if they’re everywhere in a text. But I’ll also be the first one to admit that because fragments automatically draw attention to them (due to the fact that we all had it drilled into our brains that they are to be avoided), they can be a really cool way for a writer to get a message off to a reader, without being too obvious. It’s actually one of my favorite things for authors to do, to draw attention to certain details, or to highlight that these sentences are people’s thoughts.
From the point of view of a writer…
I’m going to focus on first person narratives here, because I write them all the time. You know me, there’s nearly always at least one. Okay, so when we’re writing in first person, it really doesn’t make sense to use complete sentences all the time. There should be varying sentences, between complete, fragment, and run-on. Why? Because then it’ll read like we think. After all, how many of us actually think in complete sentences? Not a whole lot, I’ll tell you. Most of us, most of the time, think a lot of fragments. You'll notice it once you start to think about it.
From the point of view of an editor…
I want to see that you know what you’re doing with your sentence structures. So, for the most part, yeah, I want you to use complete sentences. But I’d like to see you vary it a little bit. Play around with the structures, throw in some fragments, but I really want to see you do it for a reason. Don’t just give me a fragment because you couldn’t think of the end to the sentence. Give me a fragment because it’s all the sentence that it needs to be. Otherwise, I’ll have to cut it. And that gets a little annoying, if it happens a lot.
The moral of the story?
Fragments might not be as bad as you were led to believe.
[love]
{Rani Divine}
P.S. Don’t forget to go order your copy of Dwr while they’re still available! All orders this week will be auto-upgraded to include a signature and a little note from yours truly! 
www.RAD-Writing.com/Store

Damage

The time, my friends, has finally come! The Dwr: People in the Water is here!
Head over to the RAD Store NOW to order your copy of this amazing new addiction to the Druid Novels! Both paperback and ebook versions are available, so you have no excuse. The ebook is also available on Amazon, but it’s less expensive if you get it direct from RAD… but you didn’t hear that from me.
At last, today, we’ve reached the Dwr giveaway!
To refresh your memory… all week long, instead of our regular posts, I’ve been sharing mini excerpts from my books (Coetir, Cedwig, and Dwr). Then, at the end of the day, I’ll 1) ask you a question about said excerpt, 2) ask you to share a post for me, or 3) ask you to write a review and post it online. You’ll all then have twenty-four hours from the time of that post to perform said task, and out of those of you who complete it, I’ll choose one to win a FREE autographed and personalized copy of the book in question! Today, that book is Dwr!
You cannot believe how excited I am to get to give away a copy of this novel. It’s my favorite right now, and I so look forward to you reading it!

Damage
A Dwr Excerpt, by Rani Divine© Copyright RAD Writing, 2017
“You know what to do?” he asked Piper as he sat down and removed his shirt and shoes.
She looked back at him with those big green eyes, ready to learn more about sailing and working aboard the Helena. “I’ll keep the boat just out of the way of the Helena while you’re in the water, and relay messages up to the crew whenever you give them to me.” She nodded, trying as hard as she could to act like she knew what she was doing.
“And if you see something in the water?” he asked, a smirk pulling at the corners of his mouth.
“I scream?” She grimaced.
Mal laughed. “That’ll do.”
He slid off the side of the boat and into the cool water, kicking his legs to keep himself steady and high enough that he could still speak to Piper for the time being. “I’m going to have to go under,” he told her.
“Mal,” Davy said from up on the deck, something waving in his hand. “Goggles.”
He nodded back to the man and held out his arm, watching while the goggles sailed through the air and landed nearby. They floated on the surface of the water just long enough for Mal to snatch them up and wipe the lenses before he put them over his eyes. At least this way he wouldn’t have to face the burn of the saltwater, though he wasn’t sure how easy it would be to see with the glass covering his gaze.
“Thanks,” he shouted up to the deck before returning his attention to Piper. “Just make sure the boat doesn’t move too much.”
“Yes, sir,” she said, mock saluting him before he took a deep breath and dived beneath the waves.
The first thing he noticed was the colors. Even through the goggles, everything down there was vibrant and beautiful. Everything was alive, moving through the brightly colored rock formations on the sea floor. He’d never seen such things before. In his mind, there was no word to describe the things that he saw. He hadn’t realized that they were still over the reefs, so far from the shore, but he supposed this was as good a place as any to drop the anchor and check the body of the ship.
Before he’d even gotten a chance to look at the Helena, he had to go back up for air.
“See anything?” Pip asked as soon as he breached the surface.
“It’s beautiful,” he replied, a smile on his face.
Piper’s eyes stared back into his with a look he’d never seen before, one of more than just interest and willingness to learn, but he could only ignore for the time being and dived back under the ship. This time, he took notice of the Helena. She’d only been scraped in a few places, so he knew for the most part where he needed to look.
Slowly, he ran his fingers over the surface of the wood, searching for air bubbles or places where the water might soon be able to leak into the ship. As he started on his way back toward Piper, he felt a hand entwine with his—a hand with webbed fingers and skin that felt unlike any human skin he’d ever felt before.
He unthinkingly let out any breath he’d been holding as he turned to look her in the eye, and his body panicked. He thrashed against Arneia’s hand, only to be pulled deeper into the water. Her free hand gripped tightly to his flailing arm, and before he knew what was happening, her lips were pressed against his. She forced open his mouth and expelled fresh air into his lungs, allowing him to breathe with her. It shouldn’t have been possible, but he’d already surmised that her kind must have been able to breathe both air and water. How else could she have stayed so long under the waves?
“Malcolm,” she said as she pulled away from him, breathing water and speaking in words that echoed through the waves. “Do not fear. I will not harm you.”
He nodded, now holding his breath under his own power. He couldn’t speak: not down here, underwater.
“Go.” She released his arms and pointed to the surface. “When you return, I will show you the damage.”
Again he nodded, this time propelling himself straight up and out of the water. He gasped for air and took hold of the edge of the boat, using his free hand to wipe the hair from his face. “Nothing so far,” he said, assuming that Piper was listening. In that moment, it hardly mattered to him whether she was there or not. What mattered was that Arneia was somewhere down there, in the water beneath him, and that once again she wanted to help them.
He dropped back beneath the ship and kept himself close to the keel, his hand again brushing against the wood in search of damage.
“This way,” Arneia said as she swam up beside him. She pointed to the back of the ship, to a place Malcolm hadn’t even thought had touched the ground when they’d traveled through the strait.
Still holding his breath, he looked her in the eye and shook his head. He didn’t know how to tell her that the captain would expect him to check the whole of the ship, not just take the words of this creature as fact. But looking at her now, as his hands still absently scanned over the keel, he knew that she understood.
“We will watch after you,” she said, gesturing away from them, deeper into the reef. “When you are ready, I will show you.”

Soon

Ahhh, it’s finally happened! Dwr: People in the Water is now available for purchase! Head over to The RAD Store NOW to order your copy! Both paperback and ebook versions are available, so you have no excuses here, people. The ebook is also available on Amazon, but it’s less expensive if you get it direct from RAD Writing. You didn’t hear that from me, okay?
Today, we’re continuing in our week of giveaways! I had so much fun with Monday's, and I can’t wait to see what comes of this one!
To refresh your memory… all week long, instead of our regular posts, I’m going to be sharing mini excerpts from my books (Coetir, Cedwig, and Dwr). Then, at the end of the day, I’ll 1) ask you a question about said excerpt, 2) ask you to share a post for me, or 3) ask you to write a review and post it online. You’ll all then have twenty-four hours from the time of that post to perform said task, and out of those of you who complete it, I’ll choose one to win a FREE autographed and personalized copy of the book in question!
Seriously. This week is so freaking cool.
Now that Coetir day is over, let’s get on to Cedwig!

Soon
A Cedwig Excerpt, by Rani Divine© Copyright RAD Writing, 2016
“Come,” Eirian said, gesturing to the horizon. “It will be dawn soon.”
My heart sank. I didn’t want to go back to the clearing, to the people who had filled my life up to this point. I didn’t want to work alongside Carol, to wash clothes and cook dinners and take care of the men. I wanted to stay here, with Eirian. I wanted to learn about the Cedwig, about the Dewin and the Vartes. My mind spun with all my imaginings about these people, all the questions I held about them. I needed answers, and I knew that I wouldn’t get them when I went back to Papa.
If it were up to him and the others, I would never have left the clearing in the first place. But deep in my heart, I knew that it would be best to return. If I were to stay, my people would fear for my life. They would search the woods, and they would tear down everything in their paths in an effort to find me. I knew Jonas well enough to know that. If anyone went missing, even me, he would search the woods until he found them.
I nodded, and Eirian released all but my hand.
“Let me show you something,” he said.
He helped me up onto his back, my arms grasping around his shoulders and my legs holding tight to his waist, and he ran. Just like I had seen the others do in the tops of the trees, Eirian ran. His feet landed lightly everywhere they found purchase, propelling him at a speed faster than humanly possible. Wind breezed through my hair, over my skin, the sensation like nothing I’d experienced prior. He climbed up into the highest branches at the same rate, his tail helping to balance us along the way. Even with me on his back, he was fully capable of traversing the whole of the woods at this pace, so that the cliff disappeared behind us at a nearly alarming rate.
My eyes scanned over everything we passed, over the tops of the trees, the animals resting in the vines, the moonlight bouncing off the leaves and shimmering in the night sky—all of it a blur, and yet my eyes were able to pick out even minute details of the things we passed.
We even moved close to another Cedwig, sitting at the top of a tree, staring up at the moonlight. The woman glanced at us and smiled, and Eirian said something to her in his language, words that I doubted I would ever understand. He’d only spoken it to me once before, and even then it had sounded impossible to decipher.
Within moments, we stood in the trees just beyond the clearing my people now possessed. From where we stood I saw them, still sleeping in their circle. Even the guards were still unconscious, unaware of the fact that I’d left them during the night.
The sky began to lighten. There was no point in hoping that my people would sleep through the first few hours of day. Jonas insisted that everyone be up at dawn and that they work until the light had faded from the sky. After all, it was the only way that we would have homes built before winter set in. No one knew how cold that time of year would be.
“I should go,” I whispered under my breath, my arms still holding tight around Eirian’s shoulders.
He nodded and slowly climbed down through the branches, dropping to his feet in what looked like the exact place he’d found me.
I slid down off his back, and he turned to face me. “Thank you,” I breathed, smiling sadly up at him. My brow furrowed as his skin lightened in the ever-brightening light.
Eirian reached up and pulled a flower from one of the vines. He wrapped the stem tightly around and around something else he’d found in the trees, and fastened the bracelet around my wrist. “I will return, young one,” he told me. “Remember.” He smiled.
My eyes were fixed on the bracelet that now adorned my wrist. “It’s beautiful,” I said.
He laughed lightly and ran his fingers through my hair. “Go back,” he said. “I will return.”
I looked up at him and smiled brightly. “When?” My brows rose.
“Soon,” he replied. “I will give you a sign.” He lifted my hand and played with his homemade jewelry, his eyes still staring straight into mine. “Go,” he breathed.
I nodded slowly and stepped away from him, my heart tearing as I did so. The trees were more home to me than this clearing would ever be. They were safety, shelter, security. They were home. Even without Eirian, I had always felt at home within the trees, entrapped by the vines and tangles of branches. Nothing could reach me, when I was deep enough in the trees. Not even Jonas’s rules could find me when I was there.
My feet deftly carried me back over the tops of my people, until I settled back in beside Carol.
Almost as soon as I laid my head down and closed my eyes, the guards stirred. They wouldn’t tell Jonas they’d fallen asleep.
I slipped Eirian’s bracelet from my wrist and placed it in the pocket of my dress. No one could know where I had been. I didn’t know what would happen if they found out, and I didn’t want to test it. For now, it was safer for everyone to think that I had been here, beside Carol, all night long. But in my heart, I knew where I was meant to be. The forest called to me from all around, begging me to return to its arms.
“Soon,” I whispered under my breath.

Going Swimming

Today’s the day!
Well, tomorrow’s the day, really. But you get the point.
Today’s the day that the week of giveaways begins, and tomorrow is the day that the third book in the Druid Novels, Dwr: People in the Water, finally hits shelves! You have no idea how excited I am. Seriously. Don’t even try to guess, cause you won’t know. I’m so freaking stoked right now.
All week long, instead of our regular posts, I’m going to be sharing mini excerpts from my books (Coetir, Cedwig, and Dwr). Then, at the end of the day, I’m going to 1) ask you a question about said excerpt, 2) ask you to share a post for me, or 3) ask you to write a review and post it online. You’ll all then have twenty-four hours from the time of that post to perform said task, and out of those of you who complete it, I’ll choose one to win a FREE autographed and personalized copy of the book in question!
Seriously. I’m so stoked for this week.
So let’s get all the blasé out of the way, and get started!
Going SwimmingA Coetir Excerpt, by Rani Divine© Copyright RAD Writing, 2015
“Those aren’t militia uniforms,” I told Qida after she described the men to me. They’d been wearing normal street clothes. A militia soldier would never have left the village wearing only that.
“Then what were they?” she snapped as she paced in front of me.
We were waiting just outside the village of the healers, waiting for them to let us know how my brother was doing. Neither of us doubted that he would be fine, but we were still on edge. The fact that the humans had entered the woods so soon after the death of Svi meant that they were ready for a fight. Their defeat by Qida didn’t make much difference.
But I knew that those men were not part of the militia. Lionel wouldn’t have sent them out into the woods yet. By now he knew that Isaiah was missing, but he would have them continue to search the village for at least another day before he assumed that the boy had been taken.
I’d figured it out, during the night. It wasn’t Lionel who had malice in his blood, who desired so much pain in others. It was his second—my brother. I’d seen it in his eyes, when he’d waited for Svi to die.
Plus, Lionel was old. He wouldn’t be able to stand up to anyone in a fight, much less an army of trained Coetir warriors.
“You said there were three of them?” I asked.
She nodded.
She’d just finished explaining to me that all the Coetir knew how to fight. Even the children knew how to fight. It was something that the Vartes had given them in their creation, instilled by the rebellion of the humans.
The Vartes had created the humans to take charge of the world, to care for the created, to live the lives the creator demanded of them. Instead, they—we?—had all turned away. The creator had no choice but to create another people group, the Dewin, to be the stewards, the caretakers, until humans were ready to take up their place.
I sighed lightly and leaned my head against Elim when I felt his arms wrap around my waist. “He’s going to be fine,” he whispered in my ear.
“May I see him?” Qida asked before I could reply.
“No females until he is rested,” Elim said.
She sighed and continued her pacing.
“Would you like to rest?” Elim asked me. “It’s been a long day.”

“Let’s go for a walk,” I suggested. “I don’t think I want to be around people right now.”
“Alright.” I could almost hear a smile in his voice. “Come on.” He released me and took hold of only my hand. “I’ll show you the arfordir.”
I smiled up at him, and he led me away from the village. We didn’t stop and tell anyone where we were going, we simply left. I didn’t watch where we were going; I only followed where Elim led me. I didn’t even bother to ask what arfordir meant.
The ground was covered in leaves, the branches above us were naked, and there was a chill in the air. Winter was about to be in full bloom, and I would spend my first cold season with the Coetir.
As we walked, I let my mind go blank. There were no outside influences, just Elim and me walking through the trees. All that I saw was the woods and the land that surrounded us, and all I felt was Elim’s hand in mine. I wouldn’t allow myself to think of my brothers, or my sister-in-law, or even Qida. All I wanted to think about was the here and now, to forget about the world around me, and to enjoy my time with Elim.
It was something I hadn’t truly been able to do yet. There was always something to stop me from focusing on myself.
“What is that?” I asked when a distinct white noise started to fill the area. It was almost like a constant hissing, but it waxed and waned every few seconds. I’d never heard anything like it before.
“It is the arfordir.” Elim smiled down at me, and he gently squeezed my fingers. “Come, we’re almost there.”
We picked up the pace as we moved through the trees, and the sound grew even louder.
In the distance, I saw only sky. It was as though the woods came to an abrupt end, and there was only sky left beyond it. If I hadn’t known any better, I would’ve said that this was the edge of the world, and that if we weren’t careful we could fall off.
Just before we reached the edge, Elim wrapped his arms around me, lifted me off the ground and started to run. I wrapped my arms tightly around him and closed my eyes. I didn’t know what to expect.
Whatever it was, it was the arfordir.
“Hold your breath,” he whispered in my ear.
The next thing I knew, we were falling. I did my best not to scream, and I clutched even tighter to Elim, all the while holding my breath.
When we landed, we were surrounded by water. The liquid rushed up around us, enveloping both of our bodies and causing my clothes to stick to my skin. Never in my life had I even imagined seeing so much water, much less being covered in it.
It wasn’t until I felt Elim’s legs start to kick beneath us that I realized I had no idea how to keep myself afloat.
I opened my mouth to tell Elim, and salty water flooded inside. At least I knew better than to swallow something that tasted so wretched. Instead, I expelled it from my mouth and closed my lips, still keeping my eyes closed. I could feel that we were moving, that Elim was propelling us somewhere, but I didn’t want to risk opening my eyes to find out where or how. I was having a hard enough time even imagining the expanse of water I was now within, without opening my eyes to look at it.
A moment later both our heads reached the surface, and I gasped a breath of air.
“Where are we?” I asked as I opened my eyes to look into Elim’s.
“The môr,” he said, smiling back at me.
“I don’t know how to swim,” I whispered, my limbs still clutching to his body.
“I know.” He laughed. “I won’t let you fall.”
“You already did!” I laughed.
“No,” he replied. “I jumped, with you in my arms.”
“Fine.” I wrinkled my nose at him before turning to look out at the blue water that surrounded us. “We’re in the ocean, aren’t we?” I asked.
Several feet above us, I saw the edge of the treeline. There was a cliff, which must have been where Elim and I had been only moments ago. The cliff tapered down on both sides, leading to beaches of white sand that glistened in the afternoon sun.
“Can we go over there?” I tried to point at the beach without releasing my hold on him.
“Of course.” His smile brightened.
Somehow, he moved me onto his back so that I could wrap my arms around his neck while he swam us to shore. It was amazing, the way that he moved through the water. I hoped that someday I would be able to learn to swim, if only so that I could stay in the water for hours on end. I loved the feel of the salty liquid against my skin.
Elim brought us to the shore, and we lay on the sand just inside the reach of the gentle waves. “There is another village here, just beyond the trees.” He pointed passed the beach, into the woods. “We can stay there for the night.”
I nodded, lay my head down on the soft white sand, and stared up at the sky. The sun was already on its way down and the clouds had parted to make way for the stars.
My eyes closed when Elim laced his fingers with mine. I could practically feel his eyes, watching me as I lay there before him. I wished that I could’ve looked him in the eye, that I could’ve spoken to him the way that my heart wanted me to, but I couldn’t. I kept my eyes closed and I savored the feel of my hand in his and the sand on my back and the waves caressing my skin.
It was all that I could do.
When I did finally open my eyes, it was already well after dark. The stars twinkled above us, and the moon made the sea glow white. I braced my torso up on my elbows, and I looked out over the water. I’d fallen asleep—I didn’t know how long ago the water had stopped reaching us.
“How did you sleep?” Elim whispered.
“I don’t remember the last time I slept that well,” I said.
“I’m glad.”
We were quiet again, after that. There was no point in speaking. I had a feeling that we both knew it wasn’t yet time.
I had seen the Vartes in my dreams, the past few nights. Or at least, I had heard the voice of the Vartes. I had so many questions, and the creator was only just starting to answer them. But the biggest question I had was Elim, and it seemed to be the only question the Vartes was unwilling to answer. I asked every night before I slept, and I woke still not knowing what to do.

Talkies

It’s Friday! Hooray! The weekend starts now!
I think I’ll use this time to take a nap.
But before I can do that, I have to actually talk to you about today’s topic. Of course I do. Otherwise, what would be the point of writing this?
I think it might be an existential sort of day.
So, why do we need…
Dialogue?
Obviously, I’m talking about talking. The sort of talking that happens between characters, whether it be in a short story or a novel, it’s always an important feature, and it’s always something that I look out for, no matter what hat I’m wearing that day.
From the point of view of a reader…
Bad dialogue can and will make me put a book down. It really will. It saddens me to say that, but I really don’t like it when the words don’t make sense or it’s hard to understand what’s going on because of poorly formatted or badly written dialogue. I won’t tell you how many books I’ve put down because of this, but I will tell you that the number is very large… and that those books were either returned or sold. We don’t want that to happen to our books, do we? Dialogue needs to be something that’s interspersed. Monologues are boring, and I’ll lose interest pretty quickly. It’s something that should be mixed into the exposition, little golden nuggets that I need to find in order to make sense of what’s really going on. And that’s the really fun part about good dialogue. Good dialogue is the sort that’s sure to always make me learn something about the story, rather than be distracted from it.
From the point of view of a writer…
Dialogue has always been one of those things that I really enjoy writing. I’ve not always been amazing at it, but I’ve always had a lot of fun when I write it. I do use one specific rule, when I’m writing it. It’s probably one you’ve heard before. You need to read your dialogue out loud. Get a couple of friends to act it out, if that’s easier. But you need to hear it said aloud, to figure out what you’re doing wrong. Let’s face it, we’re all doing something wrong when it comes to dialogue. It’s just one of those things that’s ridiculously hard to write—but it’s also one of those things that draws readers into the story, nearly instantly. Even if your exposition is only okay, dialogue can save your story and make it something readers will crave. So, we need to get better at it. All of us.
From the point of view of an editor…
When I’m reading a manuscript, I’m looking for dialogue that sounds like people would actually say it. That tends to be the biggest problem writers have with dialogue, that they don’t think about whether an actual person would say these words, aloud. So, that’s what I look for. If your dialogue writing skills are very poor, it will negatively color how any editor perceives your writing skills. Even if the story is great, poor dialogue means I’ll have to go through and rewrite each and every sentence in that dialogue—and that’s not something I really want to do. If you want to have a manuscript that catches the eye of every editor, make sure your dialogue is as close to on point as you know how to make it. That’s probably the best piece of advice I can give you.
Next week, we’re taking a break from this series to read some excerpts, watch some videos, and have some great giveaways in celebration of the Dwr release, next Tuesday! Don’t forget to stop in on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday, and take your chance to win free copies of the Druid Novels!
[love]
{Rani Divine}
p.s. I just noticed that my post from Monday, "Grand," is now my most highly viewed post in the history of Too Many Books To Count... thank you all so much for reading it, for supporting me and my family, and for wanting to know about my amazing grandmother. I love her dearly, and I so look forward to a big hug, when I finally get to where she is.