Alan C. Fox's Blog, page 16

The Comfort of Truth

One of the most important priorities in life is how you deal with truth.

As I have written in my book People Tools for Love and Relationships, when I was a kid I lied to my father a lot. I knew that if I admitted that I took a pumpkin from a vacant lot without permission I would be punished. If I lied and said that I had gotten permission there was a chance that I would get away with my deceit. A small chance.

I seldom lied to my mother, other than about the ten dollars I once took from her p...

The Joy of Discovery

I am a creature of many habits.

My favorite part of any vacation is returning home to sleep in my own bed. In forty-nine years I have only relocated my office twice. I have worked with Cathy, my general manager, and Ed, my Chief Financial Officer, for over thirty years. I have lived in the same house for four decades.

You might think, based on the above, that I am opposed to change. That isn’t the case. But every new habit replaces an old habit, and each begins with a discovery that my priori...

What to Do with a Pinch

I had enjoyed Dinner at the home of my wife’s parents, but this time as we were leaving something bizarre happened. We were saying our goodbyes in the hallway when my mother-in-law, I’ll call her “M” for “Mean,” suddenly reached out and pinched me – hard — on my stomach. I was too shocked to respond.

A few weeks later, after our next dinner at “M’s” house, she did the same thing, so I talked to my wife Susan about it on our way home.

“When we were leaving your mother pinched me. Hard. This is...

To Do or Not to Do – Always the Question

This morning I met with Lonnie, who has been my personal trainer for more than fifteen years. The most important part of our time together is the half hour or so during which we simply sit and talk. He knows that I prefer to postpone the actual physical exercise.

“I have news,” he said.

“Yes?” I thought – this can’t be very good. At least for me.

“Carol and I have decided to move to North Carolina. We made the decision based upon something you said years ago.”

“What did I say?”

“It was right...

Poof

My son Steven, a doctor, called me this past Saturday.

“You better check on Grandpa. He’s had a pain in his stomach for three or four days and I think he should go to an emergency room. He needs to have tests that can’t be done at an Urgent Care. Take him to a good hospital.”

An hour later I was on an airplane back to Los Angeles. My dad is 102 years old. The caretaker who usually stays with him had been on vacation for almost two weeks and she wouldn’t be back until the Tuesday after Labor D...

Do Your Hot Chocolate Right

This morning, while I was still in bed, Sprite brought me hot chocolate. It was perfect.

Later, at breakfast, she said, “I’m glad you liked it. I was worried I hadn’t added enough cream. I was already halfway to the bedroom when I decided to go back and add more because I wanted to make sure it was just right.”

The hot chocolate was delicious, but that is not my point. In life, it matters that you do things right, not merely to enjoy a better result, but to experience the pleasure – indeed, t...

It Feels so Good When It Stops

Grrrrr. A jackhammer is working on the street outside my office. It’s ruining my morning. I can’t concentrate with the constant tat-tat-tat bouncing in my head.

Eventually the annoying clatter recedes into the background and I find myself answering emails and questions from colleagues. I feel almost normal. Then, just before lunch, suddenly I feel great. What happened? Oh, yes. The jackhammer stopped.

All of us, after a time, stop consciously noticing the negative impact of something annoying...

The Entrepreneur Within

What do newborn babies work at 24/7? They work to survive. They cry for attention, eat, eliminate, sleep and grow. They learn who their caretaker is, how their hands work, and gradually learn to talk and issue instructions like “Carwee me.”

All babies are young entrepreneurs. As they grow up they might make it official and set up a lemonade stand in front of the house or sell Girl Scout or Boy Scout cookies. One friend of mine, who went on to become an anchor on national network television, b...

How to Connect – Join Their Enthsiasm

This past week I’ve been traveling with a group of friends through the Greek Islands. While my friends enjoyed swimming and shopping I entered into a new and fascinating realm by immersing myself in a new book Sapiens: A Brief History of Humankind by Yuval Noah Harari.

“What ’cha been reading?” One friend asked me before lunch, while putting down a number of shopping bags.

“The best book I’ve ever read in my life.”

“Oh, come on, Alan. Whatever it is, it can’t be the best book you’ve ever read...

Leading a Life of Noisy Desperation

You have finally succeeded in surviving the gauntlet of “I love you” and “You love me,” and are now half of a couple. Good for you! Now all you have to do is to glide down the sunny slope of “living happily ever after.”

Right?

As Sprite, the veteran of many relationships, would say, “Haha.”

After the courtship and the honeymoon, which may last a few weeks or several years, the going may get tough. And when the going gets tough, as they say, the tough get going. By “get going” I do not mean t...