Lydia Howe's Blog, page 32
September 21, 2015
The Butterfly Effect: Book Review
The Butterfly EffectBy Andy Andrews
Find it on: Amazon Goodreads
Narrative Non-Fiction 109 very short pages
About the Book Back cover blurb
Speaker and New York Times best-selling author Andy Andrews shares a compelling and powerful story about a decision one man made over a hundred years ago, and the ripple effect it's had on us individually, and nationwide, today. It's a story that will inspire courage and wisdom in the decisions we make, as well as affect the way we treat others through our lifetime. Andrews speaks over 100 times a year, and The Butterfly Effect is his #1 most requested story.
Why I Choose this Book
Years ago one of our friends gave this book to my dad for his birthday. He enjoyed it so much that he bought multiple copies to give away. I've read this book several times over the years and have enjoyed it each time.
What I Thought about the Book
Growing up our parents taught us that what we do matters and that even small decisions can affect others in huge ways. Our lives matter and what we do today not only makes a difference here and now, but can also start a chain reaction and who knows what the outcome will be? This book delves into that and the concept that "little" things can end up changing the world. The book is absolutely beautiful. It's not the traditionally illustrated book, but each page has a different background and there are different fonts, sizes of letters even a few different colors of letters. It reminds me of a scrap book with how it's put together. There's not a lot of writing on each page, rather the words are used skillfully and coupled with the illustrations create a piece of artwork. Conclusion
There is a place in the book where every time I read it I get shivers. It's inspiring and helps me remember that my life really does matter and I need to treat each moment with care.
Rating
I am giving The Butterfly Effect Five Stars and recommend it to anyone.
Find it on: Amazon Goodreads
Narrative Non-Fiction 109 very short pages
About the Book Back cover blurb
Speaker and New York Times best-selling author Andy Andrews shares a compelling and powerful story about a decision one man made over a hundred years ago, and the ripple effect it's had on us individually, and nationwide, today. It's a story that will inspire courage and wisdom in the decisions we make, as well as affect the way we treat others through our lifetime. Andrews speaks over 100 times a year, and The Butterfly Effect is his #1 most requested story.
Why I Choose this Book
Years ago one of our friends gave this book to my dad for his birthday. He enjoyed it so much that he bought multiple copies to give away. I've read this book several times over the years and have enjoyed it each time.
What I Thought about the Book
Growing up our parents taught us that what we do matters and that even small decisions can affect others in huge ways. Our lives matter and what we do today not only makes a difference here and now, but can also start a chain reaction and who knows what the outcome will be? This book delves into that and the concept that "little" things can end up changing the world. The book is absolutely beautiful. It's not the traditionally illustrated book, but each page has a different background and there are different fonts, sizes of letters even a few different colors of letters. It reminds me of a scrap book with how it's put together. There's not a lot of writing on each page, rather the words are used skillfully and coupled with the illustrations create a piece of artwork. Conclusion
There is a place in the book where every time I read it I get shivers. It's inspiring and helps me remember that my life really does matter and I need to treat each moment with care.
Rating
I am giving The Butterfly Effect Five Stars and recommend it to anyone.
Knowing God by Name: Book Review
Knowing God by NameBy David Wilkerson
Find it on: First personOne point-of-view Non-fiction 220 pages
About the Book Back cover blurb
Each of God's names reveals a defining quality about the Lord's nature and character. In Scripture he revealed these names to his people only as they needed them. In Knowing God by Name, David Wilkerson explores ten of the Hebrew names for God that most relate to times of testing and crisis, including El Elyon, El Shaddai, Jehovah Jireh, Jehovah Nissi, and Jehovah Shalom. This book is for any believer who wants to get to know God better, and particularly for those who need hope, encouragement, and a special word from God in a difficult time. It will give them a heart knowledge of God, a revelation of his names on a personal level, and a personal application of their fullest meaningnot for mere theological knowledge, but for everyday assurance and growth.
Why I Choose this Book
A couple of months ago when I was at my adopted parent's house I picked up a copy of this book and began reading it. I enjoyed and learned so much from the few chapters I read that when I came home I ordered a copy of the book so I could continue reading.
What I Thought about the Book
This book was full of so much new information and ideas that I'm pretty sure I'm going to have to read it again before too long so I can grasp all of it. That's a good thing, though, because the book was interesting and easy to read. I've come to the conclusion recently that I don't know the Bible nearly well enough and so I've been working on not only spending more time in God's word, but also reading books that expound on it. Knowing God by Name did a good job of teaching me more about not only the Bible, but also about the nature of God and who He really is. This book reminded me once again that God's name is not only powerful, but it's also to be reverenced. I realized as I was reading that over time I've become lax with how I treat God's name. I never personally used it in vain, but I had come to the point where I would read articles or books or watch short videos where it was used in vain. God's name isn't just a name and the Bible clearly teaches that we are supposed to respect it. As I began reading this book I also began working on showing God's name respect.
Conclusion
I really enjoyed reading this book. Anyone who knows me knows that I have a thing about names. I constantly ask people about their names: Who named them, were they named after anyone, what does their name mean, if they were the opposite gender what would they have been named, what is their favorite name... And the list could go on. Reading a book that focused on God's name was special for me. This book explored some new territory for me and I'm not sure if I agree with everything 100%, so I guess I need to study it some more. Overall though, it was uplifting, encouraging, enlightening and interesting.
Rating
I was debating if I should give the book four or five stars, but then I realized that I just ordered the book for my uncle's birthday, so if I liked the book that much I guess it means it should be five stars so... I'm giving Knowing God by Name Five Stars and recommend it to anyone 15 and older.
Find it on: First personOne point-of-view Non-fiction 220 pages
About the Book Back cover blurb
Each of God's names reveals a defining quality about the Lord's nature and character. In Scripture he revealed these names to his people only as they needed them. In Knowing God by Name, David Wilkerson explores ten of the Hebrew names for God that most relate to times of testing and crisis, including El Elyon, El Shaddai, Jehovah Jireh, Jehovah Nissi, and Jehovah Shalom. This book is for any believer who wants to get to know God better, and particularly for those who need hope, encouragement, and a special word from God in a difficult time. It will give them a heart knowledge of God, a revelation of his names on a personal level, and a personal application of their fullest meaningnot for mere theological knowledge, but for everyday assurance and growth.
Why I Choose this Book
A couple of months ago when I was at my adopted parent's house I picked up a copy of this book and began reading it. I enjoyed and learned so much from the few chapters I read that when I came home I ordered a copy of the book so I could continue reading.
What I Thought about the Book
This book was full of so much new information and ideas that I'm pretty sure I'm going to have to read it again before too long so I can grasp all of it. That's a good thing, though, because the book was interesting and easy to read. I've come to the conclusion recently that I don't know the Bible nearly well enough and so I've been working on not only spending more time in God's word, but also reading books that expound on it. Knowing God by Name did a good job of teaching me more about not only the Bible, but also about the nature of God and who He really is. This book reminded me once again that God's name is not only powerful, but it's also to be reverenced. I realized as I was reading that over time I've become lax with how I treat God's name. I never personally used it in vain, but I had come to the point where I would read articles or books or watch short videos where it was used in vain. God's name isn't just a name and the Bible clearly teaches that we are supposed to respect it. As I began reading this book I also began working on showing God's name respect.
Conclusion
I really enjoyed reading this book. Anyone who knows me knows that I have a thing about names. I constantly ask people about their names: Who named them, were they named after anyone, what does their name mean, if they were the opposite gender what would they have been named, what is their favorite name... And the list could go on. Reading a book that focused on God's name was special for me. This book explored some new territory for me and I'm not sure if I agree with everything 100%, so I guess I need to study it some more. Overall though, it was uplifting, encouraging, enlightening and interesting.
Rating
I was debating if I should give the book four or five stars, but then I realized that I just ordered the book for my uncle's birthday, so if I liked the book that much I guess it means it should be five stars so... I'm giving Knowing God by Name Five Stars and recommend it to anyone 15 and older.
September 18, 2015
When Life Hands You Lymes #88
Happy Friday! Yikes, y'all. This is the second to last When Life Hands You Lymes post. Crazy, right? This is the 88th week of me posting these segments and I'm not sure how to wrap my mind around the fact that it will soon be over. It will be incredibly weird for me to write a normal post on Friday, so I still haven't decided what I'll do...
Anyway, I have a busy day today, but I made sure to get up in enough time for me to post this in the morning because hey, it's important to be on time for the second to last week, right?
I hope y'all have a great day and enjoy the story!
Last Chapter
“There are so many things spilling around in my head that I can’t even think any more.” I gave Julia a dull look. “I know I need to move on. I feel ready to move on. Yet I’m not sure how to processes all that’s going on inside my brain and every time I start to process it, life gets in the way and sabotages what little headway I’ve made.” “So, outsmart life.” Julia didn’t look up from the examine she was studying for. “Right.” Going over I closed her textbook. “How?” “Get away from it.” “Die?” “No.” Julia stood up and stretched. “I didn’t think you were actually talking about breathing when you said life.” “Ok. I wasn’t.” She did have a point. “You’re talking about the every day interruptions and duties and people, that kind of thing, right?” “Yes.” “Get away from it.” “How?” “Go spend a week in some far away location where no one will bother you and you can block out the world.” “You’re a lifesaver.” I grabbed her hands and danced around the room. “Where should I go?” “Where do you want to go?” Julia grinned. “I mean, after all your Dad does own an airline which pretty much means you have the world at your finger tips.” I sat down on the couch, put my elbows on my knees and rest my face on my hands, a smile spreading across my face. “Hocking Hills sounds good.” Julia gave a dramatic sigh as she plopped down next to me. “A national park that’s a two hour drive away would be my choice of destinations if I was offered any place on earth, too.” I nudged her, “Hey, this isn’t about where I’m going or what I can see. It’s about closing one chapter of my life and opening another, right? So who cares what it looks like as long as it’s peaceful, secluded and safe?” When I told my parents about Julia’s idea, they quickly agreed. “Madalyn, that really is just what you need. A week to think through everything that has happened and find healing and get ready to move on.” Mom gave my shoulder a hard squeeze. “I’m so happy that you’re getting better.” “Me too.” “Do you think a week will be long enough?” Dad was already busy looking on-line for a place where I could go to. My parents are total go-getters. “I’m not sure, but I think if I went for any longer than a week I might just go crazy. I’m not used to being by myself for so long.” “Honey, when have you ever been by yourself?” Mom went and looked over Dad’s shoulder. I tilted my head, thinking about her question. “I’ve never gone away by myself.” That surprised me. “Wow.” “This is going to be a good experience for you then.” Mom made a silly face at me. “As long as you don’t get it into your head that you want to move out.” “Haha, thanks. I’m perfectly happy living here.” And I am. I don’t know if I would have been able to survive my years with Lyme disease without my parents support. “What about this cabin?” Dad turned the laptop so I could see the screen. “It’s cute and cozy, has peaceful surroundings and yet is still close enough to other people so that it isn’t dangerous.” Mom began ticking off the points on her fingers. “And look, right there is the perfect place for you to set up your keyboard and, oh, a kitchenette so you don’t have to leave to eat.” “It looks good. Thanks.” I gave Dad the thumbs up and he began drafting a email to the owners. “So, what did your parents think of the idea? Julia asked that night when I climbed into bed. “Have I ever mentioned you’re nosey?” I smacked her with a pillow. “Have I ever reminded you that it was my idea in the first place and that I’m your best friend and that you would be totally lost without me and that I help you with more stuff than you can even imagine and that half of your good ideas come from me and-”
“And that you sing your own praises and butter your own toast and drink your own tea and make your own bed and sometimes even wash your own hair.” “What does that have to do with anything?” Julia grabbed the pillow from me and then whacked it across my stomach. “Nothing.” “That’s what I thought you little answer-avoider, changer of subjects and all-around sneaky little muffin.” “What flavor?” “Of muffin? Blueberry.” I made gagging noises. “Come on. At least let me be orange-cranberry.” “Come on, at least let me be orange cranberry and if I keep talking enough and changing the subject then I’ll confuse Julia and she’ll forget her question.” Julia spoke in a squeaky voice, mocking me. “Ew, you smell by the way.” I gave Julia a curious look. “I just took a shower and brushed my teeth.” “So?” “You said I smell.” “What else would you do with your nose.” “Uggg.” I covered my face with my hands. “I know, I’ve been hanging out with Darrick way too much.” “Ok. So, the cabin's rented. Dates are set and I’m going to be packing next week.” “You’ve got to be kidding.” Julia raised to one elbow and gave me an incredulous look. “Why?” “Your family is so fast with everything. After six months I’m still getting used to the fact that one of you get an idea and the next thing I know it’s either being worked on or it’s already accomplished.” “Is that a problem?”
“No, it’s utterly fantastic. I love how you guys make things happen.”
“Are you sure you’ve packed enough?” Julia’s sarcastic voice made me glance around. “One keyboard, one violin, one guitar, a suitcase of clothes, five gallons of water, food to feed an army, a computer, six notebooks and journals, three candles and a dozen miscellaneous things.” “I forgot my teapot.” I turn to go back in the house. “You can’t be serious.” “I am. Thanks for reminding me.” I ran up the stairs, two at a time, grabbed my tea pot from my kitchenette and came back downstairs. “Are you sure you should be going alone? Maybe you should have someone there so you can cry on their shoulder.” Julia helped me load my stuff into Harmony. “I was just thinking that.” I jiggled my piano to make sure it was secure. “I really do need to have this time to process though.” “I know.” Julia gave me a hug when we’re finished loading. “And I’m glad you can go. I’ll miss you though. You know that, right?” “And I’ll miss you, too.” “You’ve got to go and I’ve got to get back in to work,” Julia said after we’ve stood there for a minute. “Go have an amazing time. This is going to be awesome and life changing and all that good kind of stuff.” “Thanks.” I gave her one last hug then climbed in my Jeep and drove away. Somehow I knew this week was going to be bigger and more important than I could even imagine. I’d been sick for three years. Closing one chapter and opening a new one would be difficult, but worthwhile. I felt almost giddy with excitement as I pulled on to the main road and rolled my windows down. I put some praise and worship music in and sang along with it at the top of my lungs. The two and a half hour drive seemed to fly by and I was amazed when it was finally time for me to begin following the directions the owner of the cabin had emailed us. The cabin was just as cute in real life as it was on line and it smelled like honeysuckle and wild mint. I unloaded my belongings, struggling to get the keyboard through the doorway, and then stood back and surrey my pile of stuff. “First things first.” I turned the classical music on my phone to random and then began organizing everything, starting with the perishable foods. An hour later everything was set up and I had two candles burning. I slipped off my shoes and then took the clock off the wall and stick it in a drawer. This week I was going to focus on the internal instead of the external. I picked up one of my prayer journals, reclined on the couch and began reading. That night when I finally crawled into the bed my mind is bursting, going around in circles, trying to sort and categorized everything I’d read, felt and experienced in the last few hours. I turned to explain something to Julia, only to remember that she’s not here with me. The next few days dragged by. I read my journals, took notes and wrote down ideas. I relived the pain I felt while feeling alone and forgotten. I let myself recall the times people had been insensitive. The mean things Katie said. The thoughtless comments my friends would make. The uncalled for remarks from nurses. Each time I recalled an instance, I would dwell on it for a moment, remembering the pain, then I would shake it out of my head. “Those days are over. I forgive them. I’m moving on.” Allowing myself to remember so I could purposely forgive began the emotional healing processes I had been searching for. Instead of feeling guilty whenever I thought about the hurt I had felt, I let myself accept it as part of my past. Because my past is part of my history. My past could make me stronger if I choose to use it as a springboard to move to the next level. Some of the hardest times to remember were when people who were close to me had hurt me by being insensitive. I loved the people so it bothered me to actually acknowledge the fact that they had caused me pain. I wanted to blame myself, to beat myself up for being sensitive. But I had spent years beating myself up. Now it was time to accept, forgive and move on. My mind was achingly numb each night after the many hours I had spent playing my violin and keyboard. I composed songs with a mournful tunes I didn’t even know I had in me. Grabbing my phone and notebook I recorded all of my music sessions and scribbled enough to fill two notebooks. Mom had told me once that my pain might some day turn into music that people could relate to, and it seemed like she was right. The second half of the week filled me with excitement. Now that I had explored and learned from and re-experienced the sick years of my life I was ready to move on. I placed all my journals in a box and taped it shut. Going around and around with the heavy duty tape until the box was no longer visible. I wouldn’t throw it away, but I would bury it deep in some unknown closet and forget about it. After sticking the box under the back seat of my Jeep, I skipped joyfully back to the cabin.
“New chapter. Blank page. A world of possibilities.” Sitting down at my keyboard, I took a deep breath and let my smile spill down to my fingers and race along the keys in a jaunty tune. My world was now a brighter place. A universe filled with possibilities and joys that were just waiting to be explored.
Anyway, I have a busy day today, but I made sure to get up in enough time for me to post this in the morning because hey, it's important to be on time for the second to last week, right?
I hope y'all have a great day and enjoy the story!
Last Chapter
“There are so many things spilling around in my head that I can’t even think any more.” I gave Julia a dull look. “I know I need to move on. I feel ready to move on. Yet I’m not sure how to processes all that’s going on inside my brain and every time I start to process it, life gets in the way and sabotages what little headway I’ve made.” “So, outsmart life.” Julia didn’t look up from the examine she was studying for. “Right.” Going over I closed her textbook. “How?” “Get away from it.” “Die?” “No.” Julia stood up and stretched. “I didn’t think you were actually talking about breathing when you said life.” “Ok. I wasn’t.” She did have a point. “You’re talking about the every day interruptions and duties and people, that kind of thing, right?” “Yes.” “Get away from it.” “How?” “Go spend a week in some far away location where no one will bother you and you can block out the world.” “You’re a lifesaver.” I grabbed her hands and danced around the room. “Where should I go?” “Where do you want to go?” Julia grinned. “I mean, after all your Dad does own an airline which pretty much means you have the world at your finger tips.” I sat down on the couch, put my elbows on my knees and rest my face on my hands, a smile spreading across my face. “Hocking Hills sounds good.” Julia gave a dramatic sigh as she plopped down next to me. “A national park that’s a two hour drive away would be my choice of destinations if I was offered any place on earth, too.” I nudged her, “Hey, this isn’t about where I’m going or what I can see. It’s about closing one chapter of my life and opening another, right? So who cares what it looks like as long as it’s peaceful, secluded and safe?” When I told my parents about Julia’s idea, they quickly agreed. “Madalyn, that really is just what you need. A week to think through everything that has happened and find healing and get ready to move on.” Mom gave my shoulder a hard squeeze. “I’m so happy that you’re getting better.” “Me too.” “Do you think a week will be long enough?” Dad was already busy looking on-line for a place where I could go to. My parents are total go-getters. “I’m not sure, but I think if I went for any longer than a week I might just go crazy. I’m not used to being by myself for so long.” “Honey, when have you ever been by yourself?” Mom went and looked over Dad’s shoulder. I tilted my head, thinking about her question. “I’ve never gone away by myself.” That surprised me. “Wow.” “This is going to be a good experience for you then.” Mom made a silly face at me. “As long as you don’t get it into your head that you want to move out.” “Haha, thanks. I’m perfectly happy living here.” And I am. I don’t know if I would have been able to survive my years with Lyme disease without my parents support. “What about this cabin?” Dad turned the laptop so I could see the screen. “It’s cute and cozy, has peaceful surroundings and yet is still close enough to other people so that it isn’t dangerous.” Mom began ticking off the points on her fingers. “And look, right there is the perfect place for you to set up your keyboard and, oh, a kitchenette so you don’t have to leave to eat.” “It looks good. Thanks.” I gave Dad the thumbs up and he began drafting a email to the owners. “So, what did your parents think of the idea? Julia asked that night when I climbed into bed. “Have I ever mentioned you’re nosey?” I smacked her with a pillow. “Have I ever reminded you that it was my idea in the first place and that I’m your best friend and that you would be totally lost without me and that I help you with more stuff than you can even imagine and that half of your good ideas come from me and-”
“And that you sing your own praises and butter your own toast and drink your own tea and make your own bed and sometimes even wash your own hair.” “What does that have to do with anything?” Julia grabbed the pillow from me and then whacked it across my stomach. “Nothing.” “That’s what I thought you little answer-avoider, changer of subjects and all-around sneaky little muffin.” “What flavor?” “Of muffin? Blueberry.” I made gagging noises. “Come on. At least let me be orange-cranberry.” “Come on, at least let me be orange cranberry and if I keep talking enough and changing the subject then I’ll confuse Julia and she’ll forget her question.” Julia spoke in a squeaky voice, mocking me. “Ew, you smell by the way.” I gave Julia a curious look. “I just took a shower and brushed my teeth.” “So?” “You said I smell.” “What else would you do with your nose.” “Uggg.” I covered my face with my hands. “I know, I’ve been hanging out with Darrick way too much.” “Ok. So, the cabin's rented. Dates are set and I’m going to be packing next week.” “You’ve got to be kidding.” Julia raised to one elbow and gave me an incredulous look. “Why?” “Your family is so fast with everything. After six months I’m still getting used to the fact that one of you get an idea and the next thing I know it’s either being worked on or it’s already accomplished.” “Is that a problem?”
“No, it’s utterly fantastic. I love how you guys make things happen.”
“Are you sure you’ve packed enough?” Julia’s sarcastic voice made me glance around. “One keyboard, one violin, one guitar, a suitcase of clothes, five gallons of water, food to feed an army, a computer, six notebooks and journals, three candles and a dozen miscellaneous things.” “I forgot my teapot.” I turn to go back in the house. “You can’t be serious.” “I am. Thanks for reminding me.” I ran up the stairs, two at a time, grabbed my tea pot from my kitchenette and came back downstairs. “Are you sure you should be going alone? Maybe you should have someone there so you can cry on their shoulder.” Julia helped me load my stuff into Harmony. “I was just thinking that.” I jiggled my piano to make sure it was secure. “I really do need to have this time to process though.” “I know.” Julia gave me a hug when we’re finished loading. “And I’m glad you can go. I’ll miss you though. You know that, right?” “And I’ll miss you, too.” “You’ve got to go and I’ve got to get back in to work,” Julia said after we’ve stood there for a minute. “Go have an amazing time. This is going to be awesome and life changing and all that good kind of stuff.” “Thanks.” I gave her one last hug then climbed in my Jeep and drove away. Somehow I knew this week was going to be bigger and more important than I could even imagine. I’d been sick for three years. Closing one chapter and opening a new one would be difficult, but worthwhile. I felt almost giddy with excitement as I pulled on to the main road and rolled my windows down. I put some praise and worship music in and sang along with it at the top of my lungs. The two and a half hour drive seemed to fly by and I was amazed when it was finally time for me to begin following the directions the owner of the cabin had emailed us. The cabin was just as cute in real life as it was on line and it smelled like honeysuckle and wild mint. I unloaded my belongings, struggling to get the keyboard through the doorway, and then stood back and surrey my pile of stuff. “First things first.” I turned the classical music on my phone to random and then began organizing everything, starting with the perishable foods. An hour later everything was set up and I had two candles burning. I slipped off my shoes and then took the clock off the wall and stick it in a drawer. This week I was going to focus on the internal instead of the external. I picked up one of my prayer journals, reclined on the couch and began reading. That night when I finally crawled into the bed my mind is bursting, going around in circles, trying to sort and categorized everything I’d read, felt and experienced in the last few hours. I turned to explain something to Julia, only to remember that she’s not here with me. The next few days dragged by. I read my journals, took notes and wrote down ideas. I relived the pain I felt while feeling alone and forgotten. I let myself recall the times people had been insensitive. The mean things Katie said. The thoughtless comments my friends would make. The uncalled for remarks from nurses. Each time I recalled an instance, I would dwell on it for a moment, remembering the pain, then I would shake it out of my head. “Those days are over. I forgive them. I’m moving on.” Allowing myself to remember so I could purposely forgive began the emotional healing processes I had been searching for. Instead of feeling guilty whenever I thought about the hurt I had felt, I let myself accept it as part of my past. Because my past is part of my history. My past could make me stronger if I choose to use it as a springboard to move to the next level. Some of the hardest times to remember were when people who were close to me had hurt me by being insensitive. I loved the people so it bothered me to actually acknowledge the fact that they had caused me pain. I wanted to blame myself, to beat myself up for being sensitive. But I had spent years beating myself up. Now it was time to accept, forgive and move on. My mind was achingly numb each night after the many hours I had spent playing my violin and keyboard. I composed songs with a mournful tunes I didn’t even know I had in me. Grabbing my phone and notebook I recorded all of my music sessions and scribbled enough to fill two notebooks. Mom had told me once that my pain might some day turn into music that people could relate to, and it seemed like she was right. The second half of the week filled me with excitement. Now that I had explored and learned from and re-experienced the sick years of my life I was ready to move on. I placed all my journals in a box and taped it shut. Going around and around with the heavy duty tape until the box was no longer visible. I wouldn’t throw it away, but I would bury it deep in some unknown closet and forget about it. After sticking the box under the back seat of my Jeep, I skipped joyfully back to the cabin.
“New chapter. Blank page. A world of possibilities.” Sitting down at my keyboard, I took a deep breath and let my smile spill down to my fingers and race along the keys in a jaunty tune. My world was now a brighter place. A universe filled with possibilities and joys that were just waiting to be explored.
September 17, 2015
My Brain in September
If you've followed my blog for any length of time you've probably heard me talk about my "ten things I'm thankful for" habit. (For those of you who don't know: A little over three years ago I began starting off my day by thinking of ten things for which I am thankful. Most of the time it's a prayer, expressing my gratitude to God. The habit has become so engrained in me that often my brain is spouting of things I'm thankful for before I'm even awake. This helps me start off my day with a good dose of gratitude and reminds me that no matter what happens, I'm still incredibly blessed.)
This morning my first thought was "I'm thankful for windshield wipers." I had to laugh at that one because I'm really not sure where it came from. I tried to remember if I'd just been dreaming about cars, but to no avail. The random thankfulness did make me stop and think though, because I am thankful for windshield wipers. They're useful little gadgets and driving in the rain and snow would be quite difficult without them.
So often I plow through my days, doing, doing, doing and never taking the time to stop and be still. I quite often think and say things I'm thankful for (expressing gratitude is extremely important in my book), but very rarely do I actually stop to express my thankfulness. It's more like an add-on to whatever I'm doing at the moment.
This morning I drank in the stillness, huddled in my sleeping bag on the floor and looking out at the deep blue sky, enjoying the sunlight streaming in and thanking God for dozens of little things that really aren't so little after all.
I have a lot to accomplish today. A list longer than I'll possibly be able to handle and the rest of the week should be just as busy; but I don't want to give up the best for the busiest and sometimes that's what I do.
Life isn't all about reading the most books, writing the most words, cleaning the most rooms or making the most meals. Life isn't about always having the grass cut on time, the dishes washed every night or blogs being written at a reasonable time. Life isn't about traveling all over the world or experiencing the most amazing adventures or running the most miles. Life isn't really about having or doing or experiencing. It's more about being. Being who God created me to be.
Because in reality, when it all boils down, if I'm not following God, then the doing, the experiencing and the having don't mean anything.
This morning my list that's a mile long was set aside when I saw my dad in his office and stopped to hang out with him for a little bit. Last night my plans were changed when my best friend wondered if I wanted to visit for the evening. Yesterday morning I stopped what I was doing and chatted with a neighbor for a while.
Maybe I'm over-thinking life or being overly sentimental because my birthday is coming up and I'm left gasping at another year of my life being gone and what in the world did I accomplish in the last twelve months? Maybe I'm unknowingly freaking out at the thought that changes could come any moment and I need to let these wonderful days seep into my soul. Maybe it's because it's September because let's face it: September is September.
Whatever it is, I'm thankful for the moments when I set aside my running thoughts and exciting lists (checking things off a list makes my heart happy) and piles of books I need to study and just exist. Because existing is good and I'm thankful for the reminder.
This morning my first thought was "I'm thankful for windshield wipers." I had to laugh at that one because I'm really not sure where it came from. I tried to remember if I'd just been dreaming about cars, but to no avail. The random thankfulness did make me stop and think though, because I am thankful for windshield wipers. They're useful little gadgets and driving in the rain and snow would be quite difficult without them.
So often I plow through my days, doing, doing, doing and never taking the time to stop and be still. I quite often think and say things I'm thankful for (expressing gratitude is extremely important in my book), but very rarely do I actually stop to express my thankfulness. It's more like an add-on to whatever I'm doing at the moment.
This morning I drank in the stillness, huddled in my sleeping bag on the floor and looking out at the deep blue sky, enjoying the sunlight streaming in and thanking God for dozens of little things that really aren't so little after all.
I have a lot to accomplish today. A list longer than I'll possibly be able to handle and the rest of the week should be just as busy; but I don't want to give up the best for the busiest and sometimes that's what I do.
Life isn't all about reading the most books, writing the most words, cleaning the most rooms or making the most meals. Life isn't about always having the grass cut on time, the dishes washed every night or blogs being written at a reasonable time. Life isn't about traveling all over the world or experiencing the most amazing adventures or running the most miles. Life isn't really about having or doing or experiencing. It's more about being. Being who God created me to be.
Because in reality, when it all boils down, if I'm not following God, then the doing, the experiencing and the having don't mean anything.
This morning my list that's a mile long was set aside when I saw my dad in his office and stopped to hang out with him for a little bit. Last night my plans were changed when my best friend wondered if I wanted to visit for the evening. Yesterday morning I stopped what I was doing and chatted with a neighbor for a while.
Maybe I'm over-thinking life or being overly sentimental because my birthday is coming up and I'm left gasping at another year of my life being gone and what in the world did I accomplish in the last twelve months? Maybe I'm unknowingly freaking out at the thought that changes could come any moment and I need to let these wonderful days seep into my soul. Maybe it's because it's September because let's face it: September is September.
Whatever it is, I'm thankful for the moments when I set aside my running thoughts and exciting lists (checking things off a list makes my heart happy) and piles of books I need to study and just exist. Because existing is good and I'm thankful for the reminder.
September 16, 2015
Life
Note: I wrote this earlier today on my phone and thought it published. I didn't so here y'all are.
We are in full-blown September here, folks. And it's beautiful. The brilliant blue skies, crisp air and slowly changing colors make my heart dance with happiness. This is my world. My delightful, dreamy, breath-taking views that I get to see day in and day out. It makes me feel so utterly blessed when I think about it, and I think about it quite often.
I was gone for the last seven days, six nights, spending time in Ohio, Kentucky and Tennessee. And I loved it. I had a wonderful time and enjoyed it throughly and I'm so glad I went. I had a fantastic time with my adopted family and we had lots of good conversations revolving around everything from writing to going barefoot. I got to do an amazing assortment of things from riding horses to eating ice cream. (Yes, my life with them is a dream come true.) I am thrilled for opportunities to travel and meet people and have adventures and sign books.
Do you know what though? Arriving back home was glorious. Being around my noisy, bustling family (who can be way to crazy and loud for the average human to handle) and some of our friends/co-workers as we eat and visit and joke together made me want to dance for joy. We are seriously making some of the best memories I can imagine.
My life is the kind of life I dreamed of when I was a little kid. It's not perfect by any means, but life doesn't have to be perfect to be absolutely amazing. Life is a gift that has been given to each of us and even when times are hard, we can still tweak the elements we have to work with and make it beautiful.
This summer was not the easiest for me because of health problems. There were plenty of days that I was a little puddle of tears and felt helpless. That doesn't mean that my summer was horrible though. It means I had to take the difficult times and try to learn the most I can from them because hey, difficult times are amazing lesson-learning grounds.
Life is life and I'm thrilled to be living mine.
We are in full-blown September here, folks. And it's beautiful. The brilliant blue skies, crisp air and slowly changing colors make my heart dance with happiness. This is my world. My delightful, dreamy, breath-taking views that I get to see day in and day out. It makes me feel so utterly blessed when I think about it, and I think about it quite often.
I was gone for the last seven days, six nights, spending time in Ohio, Kentucky and Tennessee. And I loved it. I had a wonderful time and enjoyed it throughly and I'm so glad I went. I had a fantastic time with my adopted family and we had lots of good conversations revolving around everything from writing to going barefoot. I got to do an amazing assortment of things from riding horses to eating ice cream. (Yes, my life with them is a dream come true.) I am thrilled for opportunities to travel and meet people and have adventures and sign books.
Do you know what though? Arriving back home was glorious. Being around my noisy, bustling family (who can be way to crazy and loud for the average human to handle) and some of our friends/co-workers as we eat and visit and joke together made me want to dance for joy. We are seriously making some of the best memories I can imagine.
My life is the kind of life I dreamed of when I was a little kid. It's not perfect by any means, but life doesn't have to be perfect to be absolutely amazing. Life is a gift that has been given to each of us and even when times are hard, we can still tweak the elements we have to work with and make it beautiful.
This summer was not the easiest for me because of health problems. There were plenty of days that I was a little puddle of tears and felt helpless. That doesn't mean that my summer was horrible though. It means I had to take the difficult times and try to learn the most I can from them because hey, difficult times are amazing lesson-learning grounds.
Life is life and I'm thrilled to be living mine.
September 14, 2015
Extreme Caving
Y'all, we did it again! Happy, happy Monday from a thrilled little blogger who spent part of Saturday and Sunday crawling around in the depths of the earth. I had such a fantastic time and I'm excited to be able to share our adventure with y'all. (I'm spending today at my adopted parent's I'm dropping the "adopted" for the rest of this post house and the internet is slow so it took what felt like half of forever to upload these pictures, but me oh my, they're worth it.)
I went to my parent's house on Wednesday of last week then Friday morning we traveled to the Creation Museum and had a wonderful time. I had so much fun getting to hang out with my friends who work there. I was especially glad to spend a couple of hours with my good friend, Susan, and her family.
Early Saturday morning we loaded the car up and drove the five and a half hours to McMinnville, Tennessee to the Cumberland Caverns. This is the third summer in a row that we've taken a group of people there and it's one of the events I look forward to most each year. We had around 130 people take part in the adventure which.
When we got there ee piled all of our backpacks and sleeping bags up and then I had a great time talking to people while Lynae (who was in charge of the trip) was taking care of registration. I especially had fun with Elizabeth and her dad, Chris. Their family has been friends with my parents for a long time but I hadn't gotten to know Elizabeth until this trip.
The past few years we've done the caving trip a couple of weeks earlier in the year and it's been really hot outside. This year I did't feel a huge temperature change when I walked into the cave, except of course because of the lack of sunshine.
Stepping into the cave is truly like dropping into another world. I tried to keep my gushing at bay, but I kept telling Lynae that I wanted to hug the cave. It's beautiful. Detailed. Awesome. When I spend time in a cave I'm reminded all over again about how amazing and creative God is. I can hardly grasp the fact that for all we know there can be caves like this under us and we don't even know it.
The Cumberland Caverns are huge. And when I say huge, I mean that it's one of the largest caves in the USA. The place where Dad does his concerts can fit six hundred people. The place where we camp out can sleep four hundred people. There are miles and miles of underground passageways. At some places the ceiling towers more than a hundred feet above the floor. That, my friends, is huge.
After a walking tour Dad did a concert for our group. It was a lot of fun because Dad let the audience pick the songs that he sang and he told a lot of cool stories that went along with his songs. The caving trip provides a friendly, almost family-ish feeling that I love.
After the concert we had supper and watched the Extreme Caving DVD (which was filmed mostly in the Cumberland Caverns) then it was time for the spelunking adventure. This is my favorite part of caving and I was excited to have Elizabeth as my spelunking pal.
When we get down into the cave it narrows down and even though 68 of us went on the spelunking tour, most of the time I could only see two or three other people because the group spreads out and goes one-by-one because of how small it is.
Elizabeth and I hung back so we could be at the very end of the group. We did that for several reasons, but the main ones being: 1. I don't like the idea of being surrounded by people while in tight spaces hundreds of feet underground2. That way we could go at our own pace and we wouldn't be holding anyone up3. We got to be with the guide who stays in the very back and that way we could ask lots of questions 4. I've been in the back every time I've done it and so I'm partial to that position
There were three guides with us. One at the front, one in the middle and one at the back. Andrea was the back guide and Elizabeth and I had so much fun talking with her and learning cool stuff about the cave that we wouldn't have heard other wise.
This is a picture (below) of Andrea coming out of one of the belly crawling places. I'm not good with distances, but I'm guessing this was about fifteen feet long. And it's not a straight stretch, either. To get through it you have to twist and turn and wiggle around rocks and use your feet to propel you forward. Plus, you're going slightly uphill so you can't see the end of the crawl space. It's a little bit freaky.
Also, please note that Andrea is really small, so the tunnel is even tinier than it looks like from this picture. To this day I'm not sure how anyone bigger than me fits through these tunnels. But they do.
With crawl spaces like that ^ the spelunking goes really slowly because Elizabeth and I had to wait for 68 other people to go in front of us. Most of the time I didn't mind waiting, but at other times I would be in a tight spaces when Elizabeth would stop walking and if I could I would back up, but other times it was best to just wait where I was. In the picture below I was waiting at this particular place for a couple of minutes and it was so tight I literally could not turn my head more than halfway. (If I took off my helmet I probably could have.) It was times like this that I would come up with a diversion tactic so I didn't get claustrophobic. Hence the picture and also lots of fun conversations between Andrea, Elizabeth and me.
I'm a tad bit confused with the names, but I'm pretty sure that this picture below is of the Lemon Squeeze. Andrea was gracious enough to stop for a moment for me to get this picture to show how small it is. Again, I'm not sure it does an adequate job. (For size reference: Look at her hand on the ground. She's small so therefore her hands are small.) There's one place that we went through that is only 11 inches tall.
At one part of the cave the ground is all bumpy and looks really cool. The last couple of times that we went though the cave the guides had everyone stop in this room and turn off their lights so people could see what complete darkness looks like. The group didn't do that this time, but I told Andrea how much I liked that part so we waited until everyone else besides the three of us were far down the tunnel then we turned off our lights and experienced extreme darkness. It was crazy.
I think I've worn this sweatshirt every time I've gone caving. I'm normally cold when we start out spelunking and then part way through I warm up, then a little bit after that I'm down right hot. I took my sweatshirt off and tied it around my waist, but then when we would go through tight spots I had to untie it and carry it with me. When I hit one of the belly-crawling parts I accidentally dropped it and since I couldn't reach back and grab it I had to pull it along with my feet which made me feel a little bit freaked out because it was such a tight space and my sweatshirt added bulk to the crawl space.
Elizabeth is so sweet and since she's pretty small she fit in the tight spots better than me and offered to carry my sweatshirt. At one point in time she warned me that it was going to get dirty. I was so relieved that I didn't have to carry it that I told her "That's fine, make it a game and try and get it as dirty as possible." Next thing I knew she was polishing the rocks with it and truly did get it filthy. I was happy with anything as long as I didn't have to carry it...
The last two years after spelunking I've been disappointed that I hadn't stopped to actually think about how far underground we were while in the middle of the adventure. The reason I hadn't is because I was afraid I would get claustrophobic and freak out and that is not a good thing.
This time I felt like I could handle it, so I asked Andrea at one point how far down we were. She said she wasn't sure, but probably about 400 feet. I let that thought soak in for a minute while looking at the rocks all around me and imaging the tight spots I had just come through and the tight spots I would be going through. Then I started feeling all hot and weird inside so I quickly stopped thinking about it again.
There was so much neat stuff to see underground. I especially liked all the neat rocks that looked like they were covered with glitter and the fossils.
After spelunking for about two hours Elizabeth announced that it felt like we had only been down there for 30 minutes and she wished that we could keep going and going. I told her I had felt the same exact way the first time I went on the adventure. I'm so glad that Elizabeth and I could do the spelunking together. It was so much fun!
After we were done spelunking I was so tired that I was happy to go to bed. I woke up multiple times during the night and I would open my eyes, stick my head out of my sleeping bag, catch a glimpse of the rocky ceiling in the dim light, smile at the adventure of it all and go back to sleep.
I'm so glad we got to go caving again and I really hope I can do it again next year. It is seriously one of my most favorite adventures that I've ever been a part of.
What about you? Have you ever been caving? Does it sound like fun to you?
*These pictures were taken by my mom, Chris, Elizabeth, Andrea and me. Thanks everyone for letting me use them!
I went to my parent's house on Wednesday of last week then Friday morning we traveled to the Creation Museum and had a wonderful time. I had so much fun getting to hang out with my friends who work there. I was especially glad to spend a couple of hours with my good friend, Susan, and her family.
Early Saturday morning we loaded the car up and drove the five and a half hours to McMinnville, Tennessee to the Cumberland Caverns. This is the third summer in a row that we've taken a group of people there and it's one of the events I look forward to most each year. We had around 130 people take part in the adventure which.
When we got there ee piled all of our backpacks and sleeping bags up and then I had a great time talking to people while Lynae (who was in charge of the trip) was taking care of registration. I especially had fun with Elizabeth and her dad, Chris. Their family has been friends with my parents for a long time but I hadn't gotten to know Elizabeth until this trip.
The past few years we've done the caving trip a couple of weeks earlier in the year and it's been really hot outside. This year I did't feel a huge temperature change when I walked into the cave, except of course because of the lack of sunshine.
Stepping into the cave is truly like dropping into another world. I tried to keep my gushing at bay, but I kept telling Lynae that I wanted to hug the cave. It's beautiful. Detailed. Awesome. When I spend time in a cave I'm reminded all over again about how amazing and creative God is. I can hardly grasp the fact that for all we know there can be caves like this under us and we don't even know it.
The Cumberland Caverns are huge. And when I say huge, I mean that it's one of the largest caves in the USA. The place where Dad does his concerts can fit six hundred people. The place where we camp out can sleep four hundred people. There are miles and miles of underground passageways. At some places the ceiling towers more than a hundred feet above the floor. That, my friends, is huge.
After a walking tour Dad did a concert for our group. It was a lot of fun because Dad let the audience pick the songs that he sang and he told a lot of cool stories that went along with his songs. The caving trip provides a friendly, almost family-ish feeling that I love.
After the concert we had supper and watched the Extreme Caving DVD (which was filmed mostly in the Cumberland Caverns) then it was time for the spelunking adventure. This is my favorite part of caving and I was excited to have Elizabeth as my spelunking pal.
When we get down into the cave it narrows down and even though 68 of us went on the spelunking tour, most of the time I could only see two or three other people because the group spreads out and goes one-by-one because of how small it is.
Elizabeth and I hung back so we could be at the very end of the group. We did that for several reasons, but the main ones being: 1. I don't like the idea of being surrounded by people while in tight spaces hundreds of feet underground2. That way we could go at our own pace and we wouldn't be holding anyone up3. We got to be with the guide who stays in the very back and that way we could ask lots of questions 4. I've been in the back every time I've done it and so I'm partial to that position 
There were three guides with us. One at the front, one in the middle and one at the back. Andrea was the back guide and Elizabeth and I had so much fun talking with her and learning cool stuff about the cave that we wouldn't have heard other wise.
This is a picture (below) of Andrea coming out of one of the belly crawling places. I'm not good with distances, but I'm guessing this was about fifteen feet long. And it's not a straight stretch, either. To get through it you have to twist and turn and wiggle around rocks and use your feet to propel you forward. Plus, you're going slightly uphill so you can't see the end of the crawl space. It's a little bit freaky.
Also, please note that Andrea is really small, so the tunnel is even tinier than it looks like from this picture. To this day I'm not sure how anyone bigger than me fits through these tunnels. But they do.
With crawl spaces like that ^ the spelunking goes really slowly because Elizabeth and I had to wait for 68 other people to go in front of us. Most of the time I didn't mind waiting, but at other times I would be in a tight spaces when Elizabeth would stop walking and if I could I would back up, but other times it was best to just wait where I was. In the picture below I was waiting at this particular place for a couple of minutes and it was so tight I literally could not turn my head more than halfway. (If I took off my helmet I probably could have.) It was times like this that I would come up with a diversion tactic so I didn't get claustrophobic. Hence the picture and also lots of fun conversations between Andrea, Elizabeth and me.
I'm a tad bit confused with the names, but I'm pretty sure that this picture below is of the Lemon Squeeze. Andrea was gracious enough to stop for a moment for me to get this picture to show how small it is. Again, I'm not sure it does an adequate job. (For size reference: Look at her hand on the ground. She's small so therefore her hands are small.) There's one place that we went through that is only 11 inches tall.
At one part of the cave the ground is all bumpy and looks really cool. The last couple of times that we went though the cave the guides had everyone stop in this room and turn off their lights so people could see what complete darkness looks like. The group didn't do that this time, but I told Andrea how much I liked that part so we waited until everyone else besides the three of us were far down the tunnel then we turned off our lights and experienced extreme darkness. It was crazy.
I think I've worn this sweatshirt every time I've gone caving. I'm normally cold when we start out spelunking and then part way through I warm up, then a little bit after that I'm down right hot. I took my sweatshirt off and tied it around my waist, but then when we would go through tight spots I had to untie it and carry it with me. When I hit one of the belly-crawling parts I accidentally dropped it and since I couldn't reach back and grab it I had to pull it along with my feet which made me feel a little bit freaked out because it was such a tight space and my sweatshirt added bulk to the crawl space.
Elizabeth is so sweet and since she's pretty small she fit in the tight spots better than me and offered to carry my sweatshirt. At one point in time she warned me that it was going to get dirty. I was so relieved that I didn't have to carry it that I told her "That's fine, make it a game and try and get it as dirty as possible." Next thing I knew she was polishing the rocks with it and truly did get it filthy. I was happy with anything as long as I didn't have to carry it...
The last two years after spelunking I've been disappointed that I hadn't stopped to actually think about how far underground we were while in the middle of the adventure. The reason I hadn't is because I was afraid I would get claustrophobic and freak out and that is not a good thing.
This time I felt like I could handle it, so I asked Andrea at one point how far down we were. She said she wasn't sure, but probably about 400 feet. I let that thought soak in for a minute while looking at the rocks all around me and imaging the tight spots I had just come through and the tight spots I would be going through. Then I started feeling all hot and weird inside so I quickly stopped thinking about it again.
There was so much neat stuff to see underground. I especially liked all the neat rocks that looked like they were covered with glitter and the fossils.
After spelunking for about two hours Elizabeth announced that it felt like we had only been down there for 30 minutes and she wished that we could keep going and going. I told her I had felt the same exact way the first time I went on the adventure. I'm so glad that Elizabeth and I could do the spelunking together. It was so much fun!
After we were done spelunking I was so tired that I was happy to go to bed. I woke up multiple times during the night and I would open my eyes, stick my head out of my sleeping bag, catch a glimpse of the rocky ceiling in the dim light, smile at the adventure of it all and go back to sleep.
I'm so glad we got to go caving again and I really hope I can do it again next year. It is seriously one of my most favorite adventures that I've ever been a part of.
What about you? Have you ever been caving? Does it sound like fun to you?
*These pictures were taken by my mom, Chris, Elizabeth, Andrea and me. Thanks everyone for letting me use them!
September 11, 2015
When Life Hands You Lymes #87
Happy late Friday night! I'm sitting here at the Creation Museum listening the rain outside and thinking about how excited I am about tomorrow and our caving adventure that is going to be taking place.
I hope y'all enjoy the 87th segment of my fictional story, When Life Hands You Lymes.
“This is a beautiful location for a doctor’s office.” Darrick pulled out his cell phone and snapped a few pictures. “Why didn’t you tell us it was so magnificent?” We’re standing in the driveway and Darrick and Julia are both turning in a full circle, taking in the mountain ranges and brilliant blue sky. “I was focused on other things.” “Right. And speaking of that we should head on in.” Mom pointed toward the door. “We don’t want to be late. We’ll be here most of the day though, so if you want to come back outside after we’ve signed in, then be my guest.” “I’m really glad you guys included me on this trip.” Julia whispered to me after we are seated in the waiting room and all the paperwork has been done. I laughed. “You make it sound like we’re going to an amusement park, not sitting in a doctor’s office.” Julia shrugged. “In my mind it’s a mini family vacation and I’m enjoying every moment of it.” She pulled out her laptop and turned it on. “To each her own.” I grinned and tapped the computer. “Nothing’s more fun in my book then sitting in a waiting room filling out reports for my boss.” “Hardy ha, ha.” Julia smacked at my hand. “Aren’t you just so cute.” “I think she is. She must take after me.” Darrick plopped down on the other side of me. “Wait a second, is it possible for a sibling to take after another sibling?” I gave Darrick a puzzled look. “I think you’re proof that it is.” Darrick knocked on my head with his knuckles. “Or we both take after Mom and Dad.” I gestured toward our parents who are sitting next to each other and working on the same computer. “You do kind of look like Dad,” Darrick studied my face. “Except you don’t have as much of a shadow as he does.” “Did he just insult you?” Julia’s eyes widened. “Cause I can totally take him out into the parking lot and beat him up for you.” I felt my shoulders sag. “You two are acting just like little kids.” “Cute little kids,” Darrick winked at me. “Well, at least one of us is cute.” “Madalyn, would you like to be first?” The nurse smiled when I stood up with a nod. “Mom, you’re coming, right?” “Of course.” Mom never missed a chance to take notes. “You’re not nervous, are you?” “I plead the fifth.” I followed Mom and the nurse up the stairs to the doctors office. It was just as comfortable and comforting as I remembered and I felt a thin covering of peace fall over me. This is going to be good. No matter what the doctor had to say I’d be able to accept it as my reality for that moment but know I was moving on. “Your blood pressure is high,” the doctor said after checking it. Dr. Shay is the first doctor I’ve ever had who checked it herself instead of regulating that duty to a nurse. “I’m a little worked up.” I willed myself to calm down. “Why is that?” Dr. Shay sat back and clasped her hands in her lap as if she has all day to listen to me. “I have a feeling that I’m going to find out that I’m over Lyme disease.” Dr. Shay’s eyebrows raised. I don’t bother looking at Mom because I’m pretty sure her reaction is the same. “Is there a problem with that?” Dr. Shay asked. “I was under the impression that that was the goal we were working toward.” “It is.” I rubbed my neck with both my hands. “The problem is that I was hoping I would feel all of the way better when I found out I was over Lyme disease, and I’m not. I just need to get used to the idea.” “Why is it that you think you’re over the disease?” “I don’t know.” I grimaced. “I have this intuition that I am though.” “And your idea is that if you find out that you are over Lyme disease and yet you still don’t feel up to par people are going to look down on you and judge you again and think you’re lazy?” I snorted. “Are you a mind reader, Dr. Shay?” She laughs, “No, but I’ve been around the disease long enough to know how it works. Don’t worry though. If the tests come back telling us that you are healed, then take that as a gift and celebrate the milestone. Don’t allow yourself to be robbed of happiness at good news just because expectations aren’t met or people are going to think the wrong thing about you.” “Thanks for the pep talk.” I took a deep breath. “Let’s get this thing going.” An hour later we’ve covered a large range of topics and I’ve given her updates on all the health conditions I can think of. She commended me for sticking to my diet so well and told me that I can stop taking one of my herbal teas. “Are you ready for the news?” Dr. Shay asked after studying the results from the tests we’ve been running while I sat there. I closed my eyes and watch the last three years of my life rush past me. So much of my history is contained in those three years, but even though the news of me being healthy might not come in exactly the condition I had dreamed of it arriving in, I am ready. “Bring it on.” “You, my dear Madalyn, are free from Lyme disease.” I felt tears welling up in my eyes and suddenly it doesn’t matter that my health isn’t in mint condition. “What?” I needed to hear the words again. “You are free of Lyme disease.” The rest of the appointment was a haze and I couldn’t keep the smile from taking over my face. “I think I’m going to go for a walk,” I told Mom as we were coming down from the doctor’s office. “Do you want to tell the family first?” I shook my head. I want solitude. “You can.” “That’s not happening.” Mom shook her head. “You can tell them when you come back in.” “Ok.” I left the building, happy I didn’t have to go through the waiting room. I spent the first several moments trying to categorize my emotions then gave up. I jogged slowly up the mountain side, my breathing still adjusting to the higher elevation of the town. Deep breath in. Deep breath out. When I reached a plateau at last I found a boulder and sat down on it. The air is warm around me but the rock is still chilly from the cold night. There are flowers growing and patches of earth and rock chips. Somewhere off in the distance I could hear birds singing and the low rumble of vehicles passing by. The wind blew gently, bringing a wave of warm air. “God, thank You.” I raised both hands in the air and looked up at the cloudless sky, joy filling my veins. “I survived.” The two words are all I say, but I felt them deeply. Somehow I knew that no matter what the rest of my life brought I would always know I am capable of more than I had realized. I survived Lyme disease and I came out the victor.
Sure, I still had a long way to go, but at least I was on the right side of the mountain. I was going down now instead of continuing the endlessly long trek upward. The trail still had bumps and I’d surely fall and get bruises along the way. I was tough though. I could handle some blood and bruises. I sat there long enough, gazing at the world around me, for the sun to noticeably change positions before climbing off my rock and stretching my legs and beginning the walk back down the mountain trail to where my family sat in the waiting room, waiting to hear the news that they’ve probably all already guessed. The Emerson family is Lyme disease free and that is reason to celebrate.
I hope y'all enjoy the 87th segment of my fictional story, When Life Hands You Lymes.
“This is a beautiful location for a doctor’s office.” Darrick pulled out his cell phone and snapped a few pictures. “Why didn’t you tell us it was so magnificent?” We’re standing in the driveway and Darrick and Julia are both turning in a full circle, taking in the mountain ranges and brilliant blue sky. “I was focused on other things.” “Right. And speaking of that we should head on in.” Mom pointed toward the door. “We don’t want to be late. We’ll be here most of the day though, so if you want to come back outside after we’ve signed in, then be my guest.” “I’m really glad you guys included me on this trip.” Julia whispered to me after we are seated in the waiting room and all the paperwork has been done. I laughed. “You make it sound like we’re going to an amusement park, not sitting in a doctor’s office.” Julia shrugged. “In my mind it’s a mini family vacation and I’m enjoying every moment of it.” She pulled out her laptop and turned it on. “To each her own.” I grinned and tapped the computer. “Nothing’s more fun in my book then sitting in a waiting room filling out reports for my boss.” “Hardy ha, ha.” Julia smacked at my hand. “Aren’t you just so cute.” “I think she is. She must take after me.” Darrick plopped down on the other side of me. “Wait a second, is it possible for a sibling to take after another sibling?” I gave Darrick a puzzled look. “I think you’re proof that it is.” Darrick knocked on my head with his knuckles. “Or we both take after Mom and Dad.” I gestured toward our parents who are sitting next to each other and working on the same computer. “You do kind of look like Dad,” Darrick studied my face. “Except you don’t have as much of a shadow as he does.” “Did he just insult you?” Julia’s eyes widened. “Cause I can totally take him out into the parking lot and beat him up for you.” I felt my shoulders sag. “You two are acting just like little kids.” “Cute little kids,” Darrick winked at me. “Well, at least one of us is cute.” “Madalyn, would you like to be first?” The nurse smiled when I stood up with a nod. “Mom, you’re coming, right?” “Of course.” Mom never missed a chance to take notes. “You’re not nervous, are you?” “I plead the fifth.” I followed Mom and the nurse up the stairs to the doctors office. It was just as comfortable and comforting as I remembered and I felt a thin covering of peace fall over me. This is going to be good. No matter what the doctor had to say I’d be able to accept it as my reality for that moment but know I was moving on. “Your blood pressure is high,” the doctor said after checking it. Dr. Shay is the first doctor I’ve ever had who checked it herself instead of regulating that duty to a nurse. “I’m a little worked up.” I willed myself to calm down. “Why is that?” Dr. Shay sat back and clasped her hands in her lap as if she has all day to listen to me. “I have a feeling that I’m going to find out that I’m over Lyme disease.” Dr. Shay’s eyebrows raised. I don’t bother looking at Mom because I’m pretty sure her reaction is the same. “Is there a problem with that?” Dr. Shay asked. “I was under the impression that that was the goal we were working toward.” “It is.” I rubbed my neck with both my hands. “The problem is that I was hoping I would feel all of the way better when I found out I was over Lyme disease, and I’m not. I just need to get used to the idea.” “Why is it that you think you’re over the disease?” “I don’t know.” I grimaced. “I have this intuition that I am though.” “And your idea is that if you find out that you are over Lyme disease and yet you still don’t feel up to par people are going to look down on you and judge you again and think you’re lazy?” I snorted. “Are you a mind reader, Dr. Shay?” She laughs, “No, but I’ve been around the disease long enough to know how it works. Don’t worry though. If the tests come back telling us that you are healed, then take that as a gift and celebrate the milestone. Don’t allow yourself to be robbed of happiness at good news just because expectations aren’t met or people are going to think the wrong thing about you.” “Thanks for the pep talk.” I took a deep breath. “Let’s get this thing going.” An hour later we’ve covered a large range of topics and I’ve given her updates on all the health conditions I can think of. She commended me for sticking to my diet so well and told me that I can stop taking one of my herbal teas. “Are you ready for the news?” Dr. Shay asked after studying the results from the tests we’ve been running while I sat there. I closed my eyes and watch the last three years of my life rush past me. So much of my history is contained in those three years, but even though the news of me being healthy might not come in exactly the condition I had dreamed of it arriving in, I am ready. “Bring it on.” “You, my dear Madalyn, are free from Lyme disease.” I felt tears welling up in my eyes and suddenly it doesn’t matter that my health isn’t in mint condition. “What?” I needed to hear the words again. “You are free of Lyme disease.” The rest of the appointment was a haze and I couldn’t keep the smile from taking over my face. “I think I’m going to go for a walk,” I told Mom as we were coming down from the doctor’s office. “Do you want to tell the family first?” I shook my head. I want solitude. “You can.” “That’s not happening.” Mom shook her head. “You can tell them when you come back in.” “Ok.” I left the building, happy I didn’t have to go through the waiting room. I spent the first several moments trying to categorize my emotions then gave up. I jogged slowly up the mountain side, my breathing still adjusting to the higher elevation of the town. Deep breath in. Deep breath out. When I reached a plateau at last I found a boulder and sat down on it. The air is warm around me but the rock is still chilly from the cold night. There are flowers growing and patches of earth and rock chips. Somewhere off in the distance I could hear birds singing and the low rumble of vehicles passing by. The wind blew gently, bringing a wave of warm air. “God, thank You.” I raised both hands in the air and looked up at the cloudless sky, joy filling my veins. “I survived.” The two words are all I say, but I felt them deeply. Somehow I knew that no matter what the rest of my life brought I would always know I am capable of more than I had realized. I survived Lyme disease and I came out the victor.
Sure, I still had a long way to go, but at least I was on the right side of the mountain. I was going down now instead of continuing the endlessly long trek upward. The trail still had bumps and I’d surely fall and get bruises along the way. I was tough though. I could handle some blood and bruises. I sat there long enough, gazing at the world around me, for the sun to noticeably change positions before climbing off my rock and stretching my legs and beginning the walk back down the mountain trail to where my family sat in the waiting room, waiting to hear the news that they’ve probably all already guessed. The Emerson family is Lyme disease free and that is reason to celebrate.
September 10, 2015
Life at My Adopted Parent's House
Today was a wonderful and busy day at my adopted parent's house. In the morning we got some work done including filling up their woodshed for the winter. We also discussed some book ideas that we want to work on in the future.
During the afternoon Dad worked on his music. It was peaceful listening to him play by the pond.
(See the swing in the background of the picture? I was swinging on it a little bit later and the rope wore clean in two. So much for my lovely little swing.)
We decided to have a cook out for supper. After starting the fire that we cooked on, I decided to try and start a fire with a flint and steel. I've never succeeded at that task before but I've wanted to for a long time now.
It took me fooreeverr, but with the help of a little bit of paper towel I finally accomplished my dream. By then it was time for us to leave so I had to douse the fire, but it was well worth it. I look forward to becoming proficient at the task now that I know I can do it. (I'm considering having "start 24 fires with flint and steel" as one of my 24 before 24 challenges.)
After the camp fire I got to ride Cowboy for a little while. I am by no means a good rider, but I do enjoy it quite a lot. I wish I had the chance to ride a horse more often.
After putting Cowboy away Dad and I practiced shooting for a while and then got out the tomahawks, throwing knifes and whips.
I haven't worked with the tomahawk or throwing knifes this year, so I didn't do the best, but it was still rewarding whenever I heard the "thawck" of the blade sticking into the stump. (Three out of four times was my record for tonight.)
When I first tried the whip this evening I was horrified at how badly I did. I could not make it crack! Since I have a whip at home I expected to be a lot better, even though I haven't practiced for a bit. We finally figured out that the end had come off it and therefore it couldn't crack. I was relieved when I tried with a different whip and it worked right away.
I also tried snuffing out a candle with the whip for the first time. I didn't fare so well with that venture, but I did succeed once, although the whip didn't exactly crack that time... Still, it was somewhat of a milestone in my whip cracking career.
Over all it was a delightful day, especially this evening. I'm now sitting out in the yard where I have service and typing on my phone. When I go inside we are going to listen to some of the songs Dad has been working on and then discuss book ideas again. Than, tomorrow morning we leave for Kentucky. We will spend the night at the Creatures Museum and then head on down to the caves. Yay!
During the afternoon Dad worked on his music. It was peaceful listening to him play by the pond.
(See the swing in the background of the picture? I was swinging on it a little bit later and the rope wore clean in two. So much for my lovely little swing.)
We decided to have a cook out for supper. After starting the fire that we cooked on, I decided to try and start a fire with a flint and steel. I've never succeeded at that task before but I've wanted to for a long time now.
It took me fooreeverr, but with the help of a little bit of paper towel I finally accomplished my dream. By then it was time for us to leave so I had to douse the fire, but it was well worth it. I look forward to becoming proficient at the task now that I know I can do it. (I'm considering having "start 24 fires with flint and steel" as one of my 24 before 24 challenges.)
After the camp fire I got to ride Cowboy for a little while. I am by no means a good rider, but I do enjoy it quite a lot. I wish I had the chance to ride a horse more often.
After putting Cowboy away Dad and I practiced shooting for a while and then got out the tomahawks, throwing knifes and whips.
I haven't worked with the tomahawk or throwing knifes this year, so I didn't do the best, but it was still rewarding whenever I heard the "thawck" of the blade sticking into the stump. (Three out of four times was my record for tonight.)
When I first tried the whip this evening I was horrified at how badly I did. I could not make it crack! Since I have a whip at home I expected to be a lot better, even though I haven't practiced for a bit. We finally figured out that the end had come off it and therefore it couldn't crack. I was relieved when I tried with a different whip and it worked right away.
I also tried snuffing out a candle with the whip for the first time. I didn't fare so well with that venture, but I did succeed once, although the whip didn't exactly crack that time... Still, it was somewhat of a milestone in my whip cracking career.
Over all it was a delightful day, especially this evening. I'm now sitting out in the yard where I have service and typing on my phone. When I go inside we are going to listen to some of the songs Dad has been working on and then discuss book ideas again. Than, tomorrow morning we leave for Kentucky. We will spend the night at the Creatures Museum and then head on down to the caves. Yay!
September 9, 2015
It's Almost Here
My list for this morning seems to be growing every time I turn around:
Blog PackFinish laundryStraighten library and officeDo typing work for my non-writing jobMake lunch for the family and school kids Read chapter and write book report for workMake sure I have the correct writing files on my computer for this weekDecide which non-fiction books to take along so I can read and write reviews
It's an exciting morning, though, as I prepare to leave to meet up with my adopted parents so we can go caving this weekend. *cue happy dance* Ever since I first stepped foot inside a real cave a little over two years ago I've been an enthusiastic caving fangirl.
So far I haven't found anything that quite compares to the knowledge that I'm hundreds of feet underground, belly-crawling through tight passageways and relying totally on our flashlights to be able to see.
At the halfway point the guide makes everyone turn off their lights for a few seconds so people can experience what it's like to be in utter darkness. I always wish that we could leave our lights off for a little bit longer so I can really soak it in.
This is my third year to do the caving adventure, and while I have to admit that I'm a little bit freaked out at the thought of going through those tight spots again (I can't think about it too long or else panic starts to build), I'm mostly a little ball of happiness.
Caving is one of the events that I've looked forward to most this year and I'm thrilled that we've been able to work it out so I can go.
I hope to see some of y'all there!
* * *
I'm still looking for suggestions for my 24 before 24 challenge. Leave a comment on this post for your chance to win a gift card!
Blog PackFinish laundryStraighten library and officeDo typing work for my non-writing jobMake lunch for the family and school kids Read chapter and write book report for workMake sure I have the correct writing files on my computer for this weekDecide which non-fiction books to take along so I can read and write reviews
It's an exciting morning, though, as I prepare to leave to meet up with my adopted parents so we can go caving this weekend. *cue happy dance* Ever since I first stepped foot inside a real cave a little over two years ago I've been an enthusiastic caving fangirl.
So far I haven't found anything that quite compares to the knowledge that I'm hundreds of feet underground, belly-crawling through tight passageways and relying totally on our flashlights to be able to see.
At the halfway point the guide makes everyone turn off their lights for a few seconds so people can experience what it's like to be in utter darkness. I always wish that we could leave our lights off for a little bit longer so I can really soak it in.
This is my third year to do the caving adventure, and while I have to admit that I'm a little bit freaked out at the thought of going through those tight spots again (I can't think about it too long or else panic starts to build), I'm mostly a little ball of happiness.
Caving is one of the events that I've looked forward to most this year and I'm thrilled that we've been able to work it out so I can go.
I hope to see some of y'all there!
* * *
I'm still looking for suggestions for my 24 before 24 challenge. Leave a comment on this post for your chance to win a gift card!
September 8, 2015
A Peek Inside my Random Brain
I sometimes get what feels like a grand idea.
Last night I was imagining being able to crochet with my feet. See, I've been crocheting with my hands long enough that I do it all the time without looking or even paying attention to what I'm doing. My thought was if I got good enough then I could crochet with my hands and my feet at the same time and that way I could be making two blankets at once.
Another semi-dream I have is of being able to read a book while holding it upside-down. I remember back about a decade ago I watched a documentary about a man who wore a special contraption that made everything flipped around so it looked upside down. After a few weeks of that his brain had switched it back so everything looked right side up again. I've been rather fascinated with upside-down stuff ever since then. Plus, I figured that reading an upside-down book would possibly trigger a different part of my brain and I'd get new ideas.
Then I got excited at the possibility of multitasking. Was it possible to get good enough that I could crochet with my hands and feet and read an upside down book, all at the same time? The idea was enchanting so this morning I started out with trying my feet at crocheting.
Let's just say it's harder than it sounds.
My toes aren't very flexible. Nor are they long and able to grasp small objects like yarn. I ended up being able to crochet a little bit using one hand and one foot, but the hand had to do far more than its share of the work. It didn't take me long to decide it was a waste of time and move on to reading an upside-down book.
I started out with Save the Cat! by Blake Snyder. It's one of the writing books I bought a couple weeks ago and I'm only a few pages in. Unfortunately it has a slightly different font that messed mightily with my brain while looking at it upside-down. Plus, do you have any clue how confusion "n" "u" "p" "q" "b" "d" and all those types of letters are while trying to read them upside-down? Let's just say it gave me a headache.
So, I switched tactics and decided try something else. I choose Go Teen Writers by Stephanie Morrill and Jill Williamson which is another writing book of mine. I've read this book before, but not recently so I had it by my writing chair so I could re-read it. Thankfully it has a normal font, so I spent some time reading it upside-down while crocheting with my hands. Thankfully that venture went a lot better than the first two. I'll probably be doing it again in the near future.
I like doing random things like this because it gives me new prospectives on life. Besides, who knows, some day I might have a character who is in a life and death situation and has to do something crazy with their feet while reading a book upside-down...
So there y'all have it: A little peek inside my brain.
* * *
What about you? What are some random, crazy ideas you've had recently?
Last night I was imagining being able to crochet with my feet. See, I've been crocheting with my hands long enough that I do it all the time without looking or even paying attention to what I'm doing. My thought was if I got good enough then I could crochet with my hands and my feet at the same time and that way I could be making two blankets at once.
Another semi-dream I have is of being able to read a book while holding it upside-down. I remember back about a decade ago I watched a documentary about a man who wore a special contraption that made everything flipped around so it looked upside down. After a few weeks of that his brain had switched it back so everything looked right side up again. I've been rather fascinated with upside-down stuff ever since then. Plus, I figured that reading an upside-down book would possibly trigger a different part of my brain and I'd get new ideas.
Then I got excited at the possibility of multitasking. Was it possible to get good enough that I could crochet with my hands and feet and read an upside down book, all at the same time? The idea was enchanting so this morning I started out with trying my feet at crocheting.
Let's just say it's harder than it sounds.
My toes aren't very flexible. Nor are they long and able to grasp small objects like yarn. I ended up being able to crochet a little bit using one hand and one foot, but the hand had to do far more than its share of the work. It didn't take me long to decide it was a waste of time and move on to reading an upside-down book.
I started out with Save the Cat! by Blake Snyder. It's one of the writing books I bought a couple weeks ago and I'm only a few pages in. Unfortunately it has a slightly different font that messed mightily with my brain while looking at it upside-down. Plus, do you have any clue how confusion "n" "u" "p" "q" "b" "d" and all those types of letters are while trying to read them upside-down? Let's just say it gave me a headache.
So, I switched tactics and decided try something else. I choose Go Teen Writers by Stephanie Morrill and Jill Williamson which is another writing book of mine. I've read this book before, but not recently so I had it by my writing chair so I could re-read it. Thankfully it has a normal font, so I spent some time reading it upside-down while crocheting with my hands. Thankfully that venture went a lot better than the first two. I'll probably be doing it again in the near future.
I like doing random things like this because it gives me new prospectives on life. Besides, who knows, some day I might have a character who is in a life and death situation and has to do something crazy with their feet while reading a book upside-down...
So there y'all have it: A little peek inside my brain.
* * *
What about you? What are some random, crazy ideas you've had recently?
