C.H.E. Sadaphal's Blog, page 4
February 23, 2017
INTIMACY ANOREXIA by DOUGLAS WEISS
The bottom line: Precise, insightful and actionable advice aimed at healing this hidden threat.
Intimacy anorexia is the active withholding of emotional, spiritual, and sexual intimacy from a spouse. It is a form of sex addiction that primarily manifests in marriage, and because intimacy anorexia can have devastating effects on the relationship and individuals, it is imperative to identify it and subsequently take action to rectify it. Intimacy Anorexia equips you to do both.
The book begins by identifying what intimacy anorexia is and then clarifies what causes it and how it manifests in a relationship. As Weiss explains, it is a form of sex addiction that lies on a continuum and can vary in its presentation but the core principles of the addiction remain the same. What the book will demonstrate is that an intimacy anorexic seeks control, and therefore they “starve” their spouse of intimacy and treat them like a roommate as opposed to a husband or wife. This not only harms the anorexic, who often seeks external outlets to satisfy their biological sex drive (e.g. pornography or adultery), but inflicts emotional abuse on the spouse as well. The latter half of the book describes strategies an intimacy anorexic uses to create and maintain distance, and then devotes a healthy amount of time to detail specific tools of healing an intimacy anorexic and the relationship using simple, easy-to-follow steps.
I purchased Intimacy Anorexia as a follow up to Dr. Weiss other book, Addicted to Adultery. What applied to that book also applies to this one in that Intimacy Anorexia is at least in part a marketing tool for you to purchase more of Dr. Weiss’s books or to enroll in a personal counseling session. This doesn’t take away from the value of the content already in the book, but it does leave the reader with the sense that more comprehensive information and healing strategies only exist in other paid resources (i.e., Intimacy Anorexia: The Workbook).
In my mind, the greatest benefit from this book is its wide range of applicability. If you are an intimacy anorexic, it will enable you to become more self-aware, clarify specific deficiencies that require growth, and guide you toward other outlets to assist you in repairing yourself and your relationship. If you are the offended spouse, it will open your eyes to the unique variables that persuade the anorexic so that you will have a clear idea on how to assist in restoration. If you are a non-professional friend, accountability partner or church leader, Intimacy Anorexia will equip you with some basic tools to assist, comfort and direct those under your care.
Dr. C. H. E. Sadaphal
February 2, 2017
ADDICTED TO ADULTERY: THE OTHER REASON SPOUSES CHEAT by DOUGLASS WEISS, PhD.
The bottom line: Solid, insightful and actionable advice aimed at healing and helping.
Whether you are in a marriage where adultery has happened or counseling a couple with an adulterer, there are some fundamental questions that deserve a meaningful answer. Such questions include, “How could this happen?” “Why did this happen?” and “Where do we go from here?” Addicted to Adultery equips you with clear answers to these questions and then provides a roadmap to assist those impacted by adultery. Dr. Weiss draws this map with a particular emphasis on healing a broken person and a broken relationship.
The book begins by describing the biological mechanisms at play that facilitate adultery while never wavering from individual responsibility (this is a fact repeatedly emphasized throughout the book). It then details “prototypes” or the different objects of affection for cheaters. The book then goes on to talk about different “types” of cheating hearts, the process of grieving, and the six types of sexual addicts. There are also chapters on abuse and abandonment. The book ends by providing resources and suggestions for those who seek more intensive assistance whether in the form of books, DVDs, a telephone call, or face-to-face interactions. What Weiss consequently does remarkably well is “zoom out” so that you have a sense not only of the acute problem but all the other variables that influenced it in the past and present so that a person may chart a well-informed path toward a healthy future.
The only reason why I gave the book less than five stars is that after reading the entire text, you are left with the overall impression that Addicted to Adultery is at least in part a marketing tool for you to purchase more of Dr. Weiss’s books or to enroll in a personal counseling session. This doesn’t take away from the value of the content already in the book, but it does leave the reader with the sense that more comprehensive information and healing strategies only exist in other paid resources.
In my mind, the greatest benefit from this book is its wide range of applicability. If you are the offending spouse in an adulterous relationship, it will enable you to become more self-aware, clarify specific deficiencies that require growth, and guide you toward other outlets to assist you in repairing yourself and your relationship. If you are the offended spouse, it will open your eyes to the unique variables that persuade the cheating heart so that you will have a clear idea on how to assist in restoration. If you are a non-professional friend, accountability partner or church leader, Addicted to Adultery will equip you with some basic tools to assist, comfort and direct those under your care.
Dr. C. H. E. Sadaphal
January 26, 2017
HELL’S BEST KEPT SECRET by RAY COMFORT
The bottom line: A fearless, Biblically sound call to action in a world soft on God’s Law.
January 20, 2017
NEW YORK THEOLOGICAL SEMINARY (NYTS): A REVIEW OF THE MDIV PROGRAM
I completed all degree requirements at the end of 2016. The purpose of this review is to give those curious about NYTS an honest assessment of what they can expect from a graduate education at the seminary. For those curious to read about reviews of individual courses, click here (password: niebuhr).
The bottom line is that I would not enroll at NYTS again, nor would I recommend it to anyone else less a few select classes from a few select professors. After three years and more than $40,000 dollars in tuition, I derived little bang for my buck and am still craving for more theological instruction. What follows will elaborate on these sentiments.
First, the good. NYTS makes working toward an MDiv relatively easy if you are bi-vocational or already serving full-time in ministry. (This is the primary reason why I applied to NYTS in the first place.) That is, for the most part, classes can be taken online so there is no need to travel into upper Manhattan 1-3 times a week for classes. Classes that do mandate a physical presence are only given during the evenings (6-9pm). Even for those courses that on paper give no option to be taken online, most professors are willing to accommodate you if you contact them in advance. And, for those who already have obtained another graduate degree, some of your prior coursework can be transferred for elective credit. The MDiv is the “standard” graduate degree for professional ministry, so NYTS does well in accommodating those working full-time and yet still desire to obtain the customary theological degree that will equip you for a broad range of positions. Financially speaking (at least when I did my initial research three years ago) the cost of obtaining an MDiv is lower at NYTS compared to most other seminaries in the Northeast. If you want to be really aggressive, you can even finish the MDiv in two years by taking summer classes and taking more than the “standard” of two courses per semester.
The quality of courses and instructors varies but generally speaking, any course taught by Drs. Alfaro, Han or Irvin is well worth your time and effort. These are brilliant men rich in wisdom and readily willing to impart upon you deep reservoirs of theological understanding.
Supervised ministry (years three and four) actually puts you in a real church or other ministerial setting that is not your own. Here, you will be able to execute on what you have learned whether that means preaching, teaching, pastoral care, etc.
Next, the bad. If you look at NYTS’s vision and mission statement on their website, it says they are “multifaith” and that they affirm “both the centrality of Bible and the diversity of its interpretation and application.” What this means in practice is that the seminary is not dedicated to the exclusive truth of the Christian faith. To validate this point, consider that in the past year NYTS launched a two-year certificate program in Islamic studies. What this also means in practice is that the instruction at the seminary is not concerned with Truth with a capital T. Rather, they are concerned with a subjective form of truth, formed in the image of personal opinion and dressed up in subjectivism and liberalism. In the swirling pool of relativism, any hint of objective truth falls down the drain. Hence, buzzwords like “urban,” “inclusive,” and “multicultural” translate to mean that after completing the MDiv program, no one would have ever earnestly scrutinized what you believe and why because you are free to believe in whatever you would like¾as long as you can express it in a “theological” way and draw upon a standard reservoir of ideas. This relativism is the ultimate downfall of NYTS and has its most palpable ramification in how the school teaches theology. Subsequently, large emphasis is given to more niche ideologies—like womanist theology and black theology—while core doctrines of the Christian faith (like the Trinity, the dual deity and humanity of Christ, penal substitutionary atonement, and justification by faith alone) are ignored altogether or glossed over. In fact, after three years, sin was almost never mentioned in the process of discourse. The curriculum at NYTS is weak when it comes to systematic theology, and apologetics and spiritual warfare are non-existent.
When I began seminary three years ago, my expectations and standards were lower because I lacked the proper sense of the high standards by which Bible teachers and pastoral leaders must adhere. Expectations should be high because when training individuals who will impart the truth of God’s Word, there is no room for the ill-prepared and indolent.
Still, when I look back on my time at NYTS, I am thankful for my experiences because had it not been, I would lack my current appreciation for the Word, ministry, and church leadership.
Dr. C. H. E. Sadaphal
January 5, 2017
DEFENDING YOUR FAITH: AN INTRODUCTION TO CHRISTIAN APOLOGETICS by R. C. SPROUL
The bottom line: Build a sturdy foundation to defend what you believe and why.
Can you readily present a persuasive case for why you believe in the Christian faith? If the answer is no, then this book will help you tremendously.
Apologetics refers to rational arguments for or justification of something. Defending Your Faith: An Introduction to Apologetics not only makes a strong reasoned case that, at its core, Christianity is cogent, but it uses the same approach to reveal how other worldviews are inherently irrational.
These feats are accomplished by establishing basic principles of epistemology, working through points and counter-points that scrutinize worldviews, tackling how we discern God’s existence, and then discriminating how we can trust the Bible. What the Christian believer is left with is a strong logical foundation that he or she can build upon when asked to defend Biblical truth. This equips them with the tools they need to make a strong, objective case for Christianity as commanded by Scripture. What a non-believer is left with is a basic working knowledge of how alternative worldviews often violate logic, and how science and faith are perfectly compatible. Truly, what is not compatible is science and the fallacious version of Christianity that is depicted in culture-at-large.
Throughout the book, Sproul does chart a course through philosophical history to reveal how objections to the Christian faith have developed over time. Particular emphasis is given to David Hume and Immanuel Kant. What the reader will find is that many “modern” objections aren’t modern at all and have been vigorously addressed in the past.
Readers should keep in mind that this book delivers on what it says—that it is an introduction to apologetics. So yes, there are more comprehensive books that will go into much greater detail on philosophical and Scriptural matters. Regardless, this book sets your apologetic compass so you will always feel assured that you are heading in the right direction.
As expected, this book is written in simple (not simplistic) language and is very easy to read. While Sproul deals with some very heavy topics, he manages to make everything very digestible. In my personal opinion, Dr. R. C. Sproul is the greatest Bible teacher alive today, so my review is not going to be totally objective. That being said, reading any book by R. C. Sproul will add value to your working knowledge of God and the Bible. I believe this book will benefit all Christians tremendously and anyone involved in teaching the Word, evangelizing, or ministering to others must read Defending Your Faith.
Dr. C. H. E. Sadaphal
December 17, 2016
WHAT CHRISTIANS SHOULD KNOW (#WCSK) VOLUME II PART XIC: THE CHRISTIAN AND THE STATE
On Justice
I will devote a significant amount of time to highlight the Biblical concept of justice in order to make a contemporary connection to living everyday under the authority of a secular regime. What you will find is that justice in a Biblical sense differs enough from justice in a modern sense that it will change how we think about, approach, and act upon injustice in society at large. Of course, the State, in making and enforcing laws, defines the contours of justice in contemporary society.
Justice, and only justice, you shall pursue,
that you may live and possess the land
which the Lord your God is giving you.
For I, the Lord, love justice.
Justice is a concern that permeates the entire Bible. This concern is found, for example, in the history of Israel being liberated from Egyptian bondage; it is found in the proclamations of the prophets; it is found in the poetry and wisdom literature of the Old Testament; Jesus begins His public ministry by announcing that He is the one to fulfill the prophetic longing to liberate those who are victims of oppression. Justice is integral to God’s character and His resultant plan for civil order and government. Hence, talking about justice is never a social, political, or an economic matter. Rather, justice is primarily a theological concern—the Bible informs us that because God is just, He requires us to do justice. And eschatologically speaking, The Lord will be the one to deliver final and ultimate justice.
Our discussion of justice is highly relevant to the topic at hand for one simple reason … Continue reading.
December 15, 2016
OLD TESTAMENT ETHICS FOR THE PEOPLE OF GOD by CHRISTOPHER J. H. WRIGHT
December 10, 2016
WHAT CHRISTIANS SHOULD KNOW (#WCSK) VOLUME II PART XIB: THE CHRISTIAN AND THE STATE
Picking up from last week…
The Christian in subjection to the State
Romans 13:1-7 is perhaps the most specific and practical text in Scripture regarding what the Christian’s stance should be toward the State:
“Every person is to be in subjection to the governing authorities. For there is no authority except from God, and those which exist are established by God. Therefore whoever resists authority has opposed the ordinance of God; and they who have opposed will receive condemnation upon themselves. For rulers are not a cause of fear for good behavior, but for evil. Do you want to have no fear of authority? Do what is good and you will have praise from the same; for it is a minister of God to you for good. But if you do what is evil, be afraid; for it does not bear the sword for nothing; for it is a minister of God, an avenger who brings wrath on the one who practices evil. Therefore it is necessary to be in subjection, not only because of wrath, but also for conscience’ sake. For because of this you also pay taxes, for rulers are servants of God, devoting themselves to this very thing. Render to all what is due them: tax to whom tax is due; custom to whom custom; fear to whom fear; honor to whom honor.”
Granted, the hard part about applying these verses is that Paul never says that the “governing authorities” are righteous, that they have any idea about what the Bible says, or that they have any idea about who Christ is.
Regardless, here within the first two verses of Romans 13, we have the most succinct and pervasive answer to what the Christian’s relationship to the State ought to be: civil obedience. That is … continue reading.
December 2, 2016
WHAT CHRISTIANS SHOULD KNOW (#WCSK) VOLUME II PART XIA: THE CHURCH AND STATE
“Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light to my path” (Psalm 119:105)
How this Biblical principle applies to your everyday life: Because every Christian lives under the authority of some form of secular government, they ought to know what the Bible says about their civic responsibility. The State is ordained by God and is deserving of our utmost respect, but our ultimate allegiance and obedience always belongs to The Lord. Obedience to the State must never mean disobedience to God.
Introduction: What is the State?
Martin Luther once wrote, “Oblige me to write once again about secular authority and its Sword: how can a Christian use be made of it and how far do Christians owe it obedience?” This question was asked hundreds of years ago, and God’s answer as revealed to us in the Bible has remained the same. Yet in contemporary society, the answer may vary depending on whom you ask. So, the purpose of this lesson is to equip you with clarity and meaningful answers regarding the Biblical model for Christian behavior as it relates to the State—even when that authority is doing something with which you do not agree. In contrast to prior lessons, this episode will dive into history and dabble a little bit in political theory for obvious reasons.
In order to know how the Christian and the State interact, we must first define what the State is. When I say, “the State,” I am referring to government, which (in America) functions at all levels: federal, state, and local.
I am making no distinction between different types of governments (e.g., democracy, socialism, or monarchy) because the Biblical principles on how Christians and the State interact are independent of the type of system by which a person is governed. The State, then, consists of governing bodies, institutions, and the people that represent it. The State can be big (like the President and the IRS) or much smaller (like your town’s police force). Every person lives under the authority of some type of government; therefore, having a solid Biblical foundation on how Christians relate to the State is crucial.
The role of the State became a pressing concern when the community of New Testament believers was established. Why? Because they …
November 12, 2016
WHAT CHRISTIANS SHOULD KNOW (#WCSK) VOLUME ZERO PART IVC: WHY SUFFERING? (BOOK OF JOB)
Job: A case study
Any discussion about suffering and the Bible would be incomplete without a mention of Job, the title character of the Old Testament book. Why? Because Job is a textbook on how suffering interacts in a world ruled by a sovereign God.
My advice to all those who have never read Job: read the book in its entirety to get the full story. To those who have read Job, I suggest reading it again. What follows will be a very succinct and focused analysis of some of the key points made in the book of Job. This analysis will assist contemporary believers who seek some meaningful answers and actionable advice when it comes to dealing with suffering. Certainly, this final part of WCSK episode 0.4 is not meant to stand by itself but is meant to be taken along with the rest of the lesson. I hope that the pieces of information you discover here will build upon your existing base of knowledge and grow your faith.
For those of you who want a quick synopsis of the book of Job, here it is:
Job is an upstanding guy. He is not sinless but is a dedicated servant of The Lord. By the permissive will of God, the devil inflicts massive suffering on Job, who loses everything except his life and his wife. Job is broken and frustrated and cries out to God in anguish. God is silent. Job lashes out some pretty scathing critiques against The Lord. Furthermore, during this time, Job gets some bad advice from his friends. Finally, God answers Job. Job had made many complaints and asked God several questions. God then asks Job questions, questions Job cannot answer. For instance, God wants to know where Job was when the foundation of the world was set. Job is speechless and ends up repenting. God chastises the friends who gave Job bad advice, and at the end of the book, God restores Job and blesses him with more than he had before. Job dies at an old age after living an abundant life.
The first thing to realize about the book of Job is that … Continue reading
