Ina Disguise's Blog: New blog, page 71
July 26, 2017
About thinking positively
I have to be honest with you, memes like this drive me insane. Especially with that stupid name tagged at the bottom of it.
Let me tell you a story about positive thinking, and how complicated it gets.
If you particularly want the background to this story, I am sure there are plenty previous posts on it, but to cut the preamble very short:
Seven years ago I was huge, even bigger than I am now. I was extremely ill and I have an old video somewhere of my sounding rather drunk, although I had stopped drinking several years before. That is how damaged my liver was.
One of the old boyfriends, that I had been very fond of at 16 or so when he went off with someone else, randomly decided that he wanted to see me. I panicked, as he had posted a picture of himself at 18 online and I assumed that like me, he looked pretty much the same apart from weight.
So, I decided to create a database of health options for losing weight and solving the health problem, still undefined, that was causing me to be exhausted, covered in psoriasis, enormous and basically struggling with my workload, which at the time, since it was just after my father, best friend, and uncle’s deaths, was considerable.
I had created an exhibit for Patrick McGoohan online, and his family had been kind enough to acknowledge it, which was basically all I had going for me at the time.
In the course of researching my database, I came across Wolfe, and as I worked on my exhibit, laughed over several of his videos. The database then transformed into an academic treatise on how obesity became desirable to Western economies, how much you are manipulated emotionally into following standard behavioural pathways, and how to rebel with a view to a more ecologically friendly version of capitalism. Naturally I assumed that Wolfe would be interested in this.
When I went to his facebook page, I was surprised to find him actually on it. Over the next several weeks I was warily cheered up somewhat (I won’t go into it, but he can be very entertaining in his own way) It got me through an extremely stressful situation when my family was stabbing me repeatedly in the face for looking after my mother. Apparently if they are selfish, everyone has to be selfish. Having been told to give up any idea of a family or future to take care of her and my father, I do not know why they then decided they wanted me dead or destroyed for actually doing it. That is the reason for Ina Disguise. If I had done anything under my own name it would have been destroyed by now.
Stupidly, I put together a film offering quite an extensive critique of him and Durianriders, using the footage of my transformation thus far, with three months of research into 801010 and the superfood approach thrown in. Unlike Harley, I am well aware why different people have different nutritional requirements, and unlike Wolfe, I just do it for a laugh.
He blocked me, and the rest is history. I was broken hearted, although I did not quite understand why at the time, and it was probably three years later before another ex came to visit bearing cake.
I am still of the opinion that if there was a person I should have been with it would have been Wolfe. I staked my remaining six boyfriends on it, and it is not a source of regret. Too bad, how sad.
The reason I am writing all this down is because of this notion of ‘positive thinking.’ I was sufficiently positive to take care of myself briefly, because I thought that I deserved better from life. I did not. When I determined that I did not, there followed a titanic struggle to decide if I really wanted to be healthy and extremely lonely on a permanent basis.
It isn’t as if anything in my life went the way I wanted it to. I was obsessed with work, and my parents’ illness, alongside the economy and my inability to appear mouldable enough for your average (very average) employer, rendered that a non-starter after my education. I wanted children, and I failed to meet anyone because I have not had a social life since 2003. I wanted to use my education to write a great book, and in the course of my musings on Wolfe, I determined that nobody would be at all interested in reading it unless I had an established name, or offered sufficient entertainment.
So, the struggle became a case of – if I think positively, I am stupidly in love with someone I never really want to meet and I stay healthy on that basis but nothing actually changes. If I allow myself to be broken by this, I do a lot of sewing, give up writing anything weighty and either way I carry on taking care of my mother. I was running out of time to have children anyway, and I never see anyone, so it was not as if anything was likely to change.
However, being in love is not useful. It uses up a lot of capacity which is more helpful for doing other things. If you allow it to run its normal course, there should be a period of hatred, and I was not at all interested in hatred. I blow hot and cold as a matter of course, and that course has not altered.
Anyway, as you can see by the website I took option 2 and developed Ina. Apparently she is fairly stylish. Nothing that I wanted to happen is going to happen in my life, and this is regardless of meeting anyone or changing my perception of anything. All that remains is the small things, and perhaps that is just as well.
I am sure that some people would say I have achieved a lot over the last four years in terms of self-development, and I am sure that is the case. My friends would tell you that I have always had a masterplan of some sort that I am working towards. I get side tracked a lot (an example being the computers to Gambia project) but I always finish things eventually. Is it useful? Probably not. The book I would have written when I met Wolfe would have been, but considering that it was a labour of love, it would have been a waste of my time as even the one person I wanted to read and use it would not have done so. Had I been thinking positively, I would have wasted years of my time on maintaining my health in order to have a longer period of extreme poverty in later life, and for what? Trying to impress yet another unimpressable boy? What on earth is useful about that?
So, I have to say, I am not a fan of endless positivity. Had I taken the positive route I may well have been beautiful by now, but there would have been nobody here to look at it, and I don’t spend a lot of time looking in the mirror. I would also have been stark raving bonkers to remain in love with somebody that repeatedly blocked me even for asking a question about his charity. As it was I pursued that line of thought for far too long, although Wolfe has had some small benefit out of that.
I am unusually clued up about why people respond to him the way they do. I took a variety of lines of investigation into the emotional triggers they are experiencing. Apart from the fact he has made a niche subject extremely entertaining and courted as much controversy as possible to attract more attention to it, which personally I regard as a stroke of genius, some of his speaking techniques have led to considerable leakage in his commercial catchment, besides the errors that everyone makes on a similar trajectory.
So, although nobody is interested in this knowledge apart from me, I have got to the end of that line of enquiry. I am left wondering why I would spend 8 or 9 years bothering to sort this mystery out. I am still rather entranced by the methodology, but I didn’t have the time for this really. It gave me something to think about apart from the horror of finding out my family were quite so vicious, and it got me through a difficult time because of the sheer distraction of weeping about something else.
In terms of myself, I still don’t rate myself highly enough, and thinking positively is not something that is likely to help. Positivity involves hope, and hope is not useful when it has already gone.
The post About thinking positively appeared first on Blogging Ina Disguise.
July 25, 2017
Ina Disguise Advice Line
Romance
When someone swears they have ‘made a mistake’ by doing whatever they did to hurt you, ignore it. They did it because they aren’t as into you as you assumed and they are lying because they fear being alone.
You should leave immediately unless your relationship had problems before you did it which required some sort of evening up of the score. In the event that you are running your relationship on a points system, you probably aren’t mature enough to be in one, or the person you are with is equally silly.
Compensating for someone else’s mistakes is not possible. (I made this mistake a lot)
You are better off alone than unhappy with someone that doesn’t genuinely like you.
Your status, whether financial or social, is not relevant to whether you deserve affection or not. Equally you should not assume that you are shooting for the moon by hitting on someone you like, whether they are God’s gift to whichever gender or not. (They usually aren’t)
The ‘one’ is merely the person that happened to be at the same point in their life as you. If you aren’t sure, the answer is no and you should move on as fast as possible.
People are complex, and they age at different rates. Just because you are/not a party animal, it does not make you any younger or older than people who prefer to do more productive things with their time. Some of the most jaded people I have come across believed they could retain their youth by being irresponsible.
Do not listen to people who say that you ‘need’ other people. You don’t.
Do not listen to songs which tell you not to give up. You probably should. Having said that, culturally we are being told to dispose of people far too easily in order to maintain the economy via people changing houses/partners/jobs. It is up to you how you choose to live your life, not a pop song or the needs of an increasingly desperate political economy.
If you are fortunate enough to meet a reasonably serious person who cares about you at an early age, go for it. Nobody genuinely worries if you have a failed relationship or two behind you.
Employment
It is likely that you will have to change jobs a number of times in the course of your life. That terribly important bit of banking admin or whatever that you landed may well be totally irrelevant in two years of you getting the job. I have lost count of the number of jobs that I did not get that no longer existed/turned out to be scammers/ended up employing someone too dumb to see through whatever they were doing badly. Sometimes being rejected is a good thing.
A huge number of jobs, particularly in offices, do not want motivated people who care about the job. They simply want you to say yes in order to pay your bills. It is up to you how you respond to this, but you will preserve your mental health if you accept a less well paid job and find your own method of making a living outwith that job. The best paying job I was ever in involved mind-numbing inefficiency and a lot of travel, meaning that you could not pursue anything of your own. I will never forget the look on the regular staff’s faces when I told them I was just doing it to pay for more wool, nor will I forget the weeping when the contract ended because they thought their lives were over. Never invest too much in one job in this day and age.
Stabbing other people in the back is considered a good way of climbing the corporate ladder. Again it is up to you if you wish to do this, but I can tell you you will feel a lot better about yourself if you do not care about becoming the best cheat in the company in the first place.
Socialising with other staff members is over-rated. It is best to retain some mystery and avoid bonking people at work.
Family
Anyone who tells you that you must never confront your family in case you fall out with them is trying to smother you. Family, in my experience, is the most dangerous place in the world.
If you want to have children, do it regardless of the state of your finances/relationship. You have a limited time to create your tribe and may not be free to do it later.
Children, whilst they are better at making cups of tea than cats, are not necessarily going to be nice to you when you get old. Be very careful about the values you give your little go-getters, because they will very quickly learn to take rather than give.
Parents are people, and should not be taken any more seriously than that. Yes there are rules when you are young, but by the time you hit 17 or so, you should really be trying to think for yourself.
Travel
Travel is interesting. I did a lot of it when I was younger. Bear in mind however, that even the next town is different from yours. There is nothing sadder than someone boasting about going around the world whilst knowing nothing about their own country.
Snobbery
A great amount of bullying/social structuring is done on the basis that people assume superiority over others. In the event that you buy into this, you are extremely foolish. I have been persecuted by people who assumed that I was ‘better’ than them on numerous occasions which has caused me to avoid people altogether. It is not fun to be around people with a superiority or inferiority complex and it serves absolutely no useful purpose.
Education
You should never stop learning. Learning is really what keeps you young and open-minded. At my advanced age, I still find myself gravitating towards people less than half my age because they do not assume status or knowledge that they do not genuinely have. If you stop role-playing, you will learn a lot more and be a more useful person generally. Being useful is more rewarding than being rich.
Ego
People will make all sorts of assumptions about how they perceive you throughout your life. It is best to ignore them. My greatest mistake was reacting to people telling me what they thought I was. Don’t end up like me. You are the most important person in your life. If anybody wants to challenge that, remove them.
The post Ina Disguise Advice Line appeared first on Blogging Ina Disguise.
Ina Disguise Advice Line
Romance
When someone swears they have ‘made a mistake’ by doing whatever they did to hurt you, ignore it. They did it because they aren’t as into you as you assumed and they are lying because they fear being alone.
You should leave immediately unless your relationship had problems before you did it which required some sort of evening up of the score. In the event that you are running your relationship on a points system, you probably aren’t mature enough to be in one, or the person you are with is equally silly.
Compensating for someone else’s mistakes is not possible. (I made this mistake a lot)
You are better off alone than unhappy with someone that doesn’t genuinely like you.
Your status, whether financial or social, is not relevant to whether you deserve affection or not. Equally you should not assume that you are shooting for the moon by hitting on someone you like, whether they are God’s gift to whichever gender or not. (They usually aren’t)
The ‘one’ is merely the person that happened to be at the same point in their life as you. If you aren’t sure, the answer is no and you should move on as fast as possible.
People are complex, and they age at different rates. Just because you are/not a party animal, it does not make you any younger or older than people who prefer to do more productive things with their time. Some of the most jaded people I have come across believed they could retain their youth by being irresponsible.
Do not listen to people who say that you ‘need’ other people. You don’t.
Do not listen to songs which tell you not to give up. You probably should. Having said that, culturally we are being told to dispose of people far too easily in order to maintain the economy via people changing houses/partners/jobs. It is up to you how you choose to live your life, not a pop song or the needs of an increasingly desperate political economy.
If you are fortunate enough to meet a reasonably serious person who cares about you at an early age, go for it. Nobody genuinely worries if you have a failed relationship or two behind you.
Employment
It is likely that you will have to change jobs a number of times in the course of your life. That terribly important bit of banking admin or whatever that you landed may well be totally irrelevant in two years of you getting the job. I have lost count of the number of jobs that I did not get that no longer existed/turned out to be scammers/ended up employing someone too dumb to see through whatever they were doing badly. Sometimes being rejected is a good thing.
A huge number of jobs, particularly in offices, do not want motivated people who care about the job. They simply want you to say yes in order to pay your bills. It is up to you how you respond to this, but you will preserve your mental health if you accept a less well paid job and find your own method of making a living outwith that job. The best paying job I was ever in involved mind-numbing inefficiency and a lot of travel, meaning that you could not pursue anything of your own. I will never forget the look on the regular staff’s faces when I told them I was just doing it to pay for more wool, nor will I forget the weeping when the contract ended because they thought their lives were over. Never invest too much in one job in this day and age.
Stabbing other people in the back is considered a good way of climbing the corporate ladder. Again it is up to you if you wish to do this, but I can tell you you will feel a lot better about yourself if you do not care about becoming the best cheat in the company in the first place.
Socialising with other staff members is over-rated. It is best to retain some mystery and avoid bonking people at work.
Family
Anyone who tells you that you must never confront your family in case you fall out with them is trying to smother you. Family, in my experience, is the most dangerous place in the world.
If you want to have children, do it regardless of the state of your finances/relationship. You have a limited time to create your tribe and may not be free to do it later.
Children, whilst they are better at making cups of tea than cats, are not necessarily going to be nice to you when you get old. Be very careful about the values you give your little go-getters, because they will very quickly learn to take rather than give.
Parents are people, and should not be taken any more seriously than that. Yes there are rules when you are young, but by the time you hit 17 or so, you should really be trying to think for yourself.
Travel
Travel is interesting. I did a lot of it when I was younger. Bear in mind however, that even the next town is different from yours. There is nothing sadder than someone boasting about going around the world whilst knowing nothing about their own country.
Snobbery
A great amount of bullying/social structuring is done on the basis that people assume superiority over others. In the event that you buy into this, you are extremely foolish. I have been persecuted by people who assumed that I was ‘better’ than them on numerous occasions which has caused me to avoid people altogether. It is not fun to be around people with a superiority or inferiority complex and it serves absolutely no useful purpose.
Education
You should never stop learning. Learning is really what keeps you young and open-minded. At my advanced age, I still find myself gravitating towards people less than half my age because they do not assume status or knowledge that they do not genuinely have. If you stop role-playing, you will learn a lot more and be a more useful person generally. Being useful is more rewarding than being rich.
Ego
People will make all sorts of assumptions about how they perceive you throughout your life. It is best to ignore them. My greatest mistake was reacting to people telling me what they thought I was. Don’t end up like me. You are the most important person in your life. If anybody wants to challenge that, remove them.
The post Ina Disguise Advice Line appeared first on Blogging Ina Disguise.
Practicality and a bit of Depression
The last four months has seen me persuading the eleventh doctor that I had asked about my mother’s leg to put her into hospital for a much-needed urgent scan, persuading a consultant to scan her because they had decided not to bother after an intestinal bleed, persuading the GP that she did not need four medications and re-formulating her diet to ensure that she would not require further interference, which at this point means that anyone prescribing to her is likely to put her at risk.
We have always followed a policy of ‘the less medications the better’ as my parents were brought up pre-antibiotics, when two of our family doctors were also trained homeopaths who in their later careers still avoided prescribing antibiotics.
Our lives are no longer private. From a peaceful existence in which we made our own decisions and managed despite the lack of help from so-called-professionals, we are now at the mercy of people who did a course a couple of decades ago and think they know how we should live. It is frankly a miracle that my mother made it to 90, I am considered so incompetent.
In any case, I can no longer sew in the same room as her, for fear of being accused of making a mess or neglecting her by not standing over her bed. I cannot leave the room when the nurses appear to give her a five minute injection. If anything changes overnight I am responsible for it, and if anything improves I am obviously nothing to do with it. As you can imagine this is intensely annoying.
In the meantime, the longest meeting in history is still being held about my mother. The system is such that ten people that do not know my mother and who could care even less sit and try to make decisions based upon no relevant information. I have to tolerate endless visits from people I do not wish to see, and if I try to input any relevant information it is to be used against me, as per the policies of the social work department. It is not helpful, and it is not very pleasant.
So, as you can imagine, I cannot get much work done at the moment, and since my mother is at risk, I have had to take on some more conventional work in case I end up having to pay for the house. I am behind with some administrative tasks due to threats made by the ‘professionals’ and I cannot really do anything without someone else knowing about it, which I object to.
Taking care of other people involves giving up control over your life in order to improve somebody else’s. When you are able to make some decisions this is tolerable, but when these decisions are put in the hands of a random stranger, life becomes less bearable. I have managed to prevent some of the worst implications of the intrusion into our life, but inevitably something has to suffer.
Particularly with sewing and textile work there is no point in even starting if you are in any way stressed. Since she came home I have been unable to get to the studio, as I am now keeping it firmly locked, unable to work with chemicals, in case it affects her, and unable to sew because I am so tense that nothing will sculpt correctly. So, I have taken a sub-contract with Microsoft which does not involve the same level of dexterity. This is depressing in the extreme, as it means that all future project completions are on hold.
I can only hope that the misery of having to do this will spur me on to finish the games and get them out. As all the work I did on my own health is now effectively being used on my mother I cannot really afford to keep working on me. I am very tired, to the point of sleeping if I lie down at all, and I am experiencing headaches and sore limbs because I no longer have any freedom at all. The room I used to sit in and sew with my mother is now devoted to medical equipment, and so you really want to avoid it if you can.
Even this has been used as a weapon, they tried to insist that I put the furniture back in it before the equipment arrived. They prevented me from getting her out of bed, and every time any progress is mentioned, somebody has a negative comment to make about it. Depressing in the extreme.
As my birthday is coming up it is time to take stock, and as such I find I have not done as much as I wanted to do this year. There are at least three books on hold, two games, the collection for Boris, and the courses I was doing in an effort to create something much bigger for Wolfe. Nothing is as it should be.
So, my conclusion is to work for a few months, put some money aside to render us a bit safer, and if I am still well enough after that I will recommence what I was doing. Who knows, perhaps being bored out of my mind doing a job I don’t want to fund our lives despite the interference of a bunch of bitching strangers will spur me on to achieve more in terms of the courses. Who cares about my health anyway? After my mother dies nobody. Nobody considers the loss of control involved in caring for other people, and nobody points it out. It is a blame game, in which the carer always finishes last.
The post Practicality and a bit of Depression appeared first on Blogging Ina Disguise.
Practicality and a bit of Depression
The last four months has seen me persuading the eleventh doctor that I had asked about my mother’s leg to put her into hospital for a much-needed urgent scan, persuading a consultant to scan her because they had decided not to bother after an intestinal bleed, persuading the GP that she did not need four medications and re-formulating her diet to ensure that she would not require further interference, which at this point means that anyone prescribing to her is likely to put her at risk.
We have always followed a policy of ‘the less medications the better’ as my parents were brought up pre-antibiotics, when two of our family doctors were also trained homeopaths who in their later careers still avoided prescribing antibiotics.
Our lives are no longer private. From a peaceful existence in which we made our own decisions and managed despite the lack of help from so-called-professionals, we are now at the mercy of people who did a course a couple of decades ago and think they know how we should live. It is frankly a miracle that my mother made it to 90, I am considered so incompetent.
In any case, I can no longer sew in the same room as her, for fear of being accused of making a mess or neglecting her by not standing over her bed. I cannot leave the room when the nurses appear to give her a five minute injection. If anything changes overnight I am responsible for it, and if anything improves I am obviously nothing to do with it. As you can imagine this is intensely annoying.
In the meantime, the longest meeting in history is still being held about my mother. The system is such that ten people that do not know my mother and who could care even less sit and try to make decisions based upon no relevant information. I have to tolerate endless visits from people I do not wish to see, and if I try to input any relevant information it is to be used against me, as per the policies of the social work department. It is not helpful, and it is not very pleasant.
So, as you can imagine, I cannot get much work done at the moment, and since my mother is at risk, I have had to take on some more conventional work in case I end up having to pay for the house. I am behind with some administrative tasks due to threats made by the ‘professionals’ and I cannot really do anything without someone else knowing about it, which I object to.
Taking care of other people involves giving up control over your life in order to improve somebody else’s. When you are able to make some decisions this is tolerable, but when these decisions are put in the hands of a random stranger, life becomes less bearable. I have managed to prevent some of the worst implications of the intrusion into our life, but inevitably something has to suffer.
Particularly with sewing and textile work there is no point in even starting if you are in any way stressed. Since she came home I have been unable to get to the studio, as I am now keeping it firmly locked, unable to work with chemicals, in case it affects her, and unable to sew because I am so tense that nothing will sculpt correctly. So, I have taken a sub-contract with Microsoft which does not involve the same level of dexterity. This is depressing in the extreme, as it means that all future project completions are on hold.
I can only hope that the misery of having to do this will spur me on to finish the games and get them out. As all the work I did on my own health is now effectively being used on my mother I cannot really afford to keep working on me. I am very tired, to the point of sleeping if I lie down at all, and I am experiencing headaches and sore limbs because I no longer have any freedom at all. The room I used to sit in and sew with my mother is now devoted to medical equipment, and so you really want to avoid it if you can.
Even this has been used as a weapon, they tried to insist that I put the furniture back in it before the equipment arrived. They prevented me from getting her out of bed, and every time any progress is mentioned, somebody has a negative comment to make about it. Depressing in the extreme.
As my birthday is coming up it is time to take stock, and as such I find I have not done as much as I wanted to do this year. There are at least three books on hold, two games, the collection for Boris, and the courses I was doing in an effort to create something much bigger for Wolfe. Nothing is as it should be.
So, my conclusion is to work for a few months, put some money aside to render us a bit safer, and if I am still well enough after that I will recommence what I was doing. Who knows, perhaps being bored out of my mind doing a job I don’t want to fund our lives despite the interference of a bunch of bitching strangers will spur me on to achieve more in terms of the courses. Who cares about my health anyway? After my mother dies nobody. Nobody considers the loss of control involved in caring for other people, and nobody points it out. It is a blame game, in which the carer always finishes last.
The post Practicality and a bit of Depression appeared first on Blogging Ina Disguise.
July 24, 2017
David Wolfe ‘Woo’ versus the NHS Dietitican
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So, let me get something straight before I start, since readers now are obviously not the same people who were reading me before.
I owe Wolfe a favour. I owed Wolfe a favour before we even spoke. After I got a seemingly rare glimpse of a real person, he decided I was a threat to him and so we have established that Wolfe and I do not get on. If you take a look at the other pages on the site, you will see I have devoted my recent artwork development phase to Wolfe, simply to get his name on about fifty more sites in the course of advertising my books and artwork. So, I have sort of returned my favour, although Wolfe certainly didn’t make me feel particularly valuable as I did it. So, despite the favour being my mother and I being alive, as such being a pretty big favour, I feel I have sort of worked a bit to pay it off.
Since I have never paid him a penny for anything, I am sure Wolfe will feel that this is debatable, but fuck it. I may not have finished the blockbuster due to general self-doubt, caused in no small part to Wolfe being a paranoid dick, but I have done what I can with the emotional baggage available to me.
Having said all that, here is a typical article from a rational person about Wolfe:
Don’t Cry Wolfe: New Age Con-Artistry and Anti-Intellectualism
Feel free to read this, and the follow up before you continue with today’s post. It is the usual superficial understanding of what Wolfe does, whether it is witting or unwitting on his part. Yes, he is driven, yes, he likes money, yes, he has the toughest shell I have ever come across but here’s the thing – if Wolfe was not spectacular, obsessed and an ardent follower of the Jim Rohn school of shameless self-promotion, I would never have heard of him. I and thousands of others would never have had the confidence to spend several hundred hours researching nutrition, and I am sure I am not the only person who would have suffered as a result.
No, life isn’t perfect and yes, natural health is an expensive habit to get into.
However, if you rely on science, conventional medicine and labels to tell you what is and is not good for you you are likely to have a shorter and more miserable life.
This week, I was sent an NHS qualified dietician to tell me that I was not feeding my mother properly. You can see in the previous posts what has just happened with my mother. She was sent home to me dying, on the basis that she would be here for a few weeks and then be taken off to be sedated to death under the NHS ‘Liverpool’ care plan. She had lost contact with her legs, her organs were shutting down, her white cell count was on the decline. She was not in a good way.
The Social Work Department have made a point of not understanding that it is her unconventional diet that has reversed this, to the point that she is now functioning better than she has in years, on a nutrition plan which was devised partly from my dear friend Wolfe, and partly from my own interest in herbalism and nutrition via wherever I can get relevant information. So, she has Ayuverdic, Chinese medicine, Middle Eastern, and bodybuilder’s approaches in her mix. She is now able to communicate with her legs, she has formed muscle where there was merely teabag skin and bone, and she can do sit ups.
Because the district nursing service and social work department have never come across a 90 year old getting well, it has taken two months even to get the services I do want. I have finally scored a physiotherapist to inspect my work and hopefully enhance it in a couple of days time. The dietitian however, was sent to stop me feeding my mother properly.
I am told that old people eat mince and potatoes. My family apparently believe that my mother eats this. As a former Michelin level chef, my mother has not been fed crap like this at home for two decades, even as she sneered at me for being a raw foodist.
“Your diet is unconventional.” the dietician tried.
“So what? How many 90 year olds have you come across that get 7-8 portions of fruit and vegetables per day as a nutritional bottom line?”
“None. Have you tried peanut butter?”
“Peanuts are legumes, and are acidic. Furthermore they encourage fungal infections. She gets three different nuts in her drink every day. Did you know that one Brazil nut contains your entire daily requirement of Selenium? Do you know how important Selenium is?”
She looked blank.
“I also have a very high grade B12 supplement which she takes under her tongue.”
“All old people have a B12 deficiency, we don’t bother about that.”
WTF The NHS does not bother about B12 deficiency? I also had the GP ask me where the carbohydrates were in a drink consisting of Superfoods, fruit, vegetables and honey. What the actual fuck are they teaching these people?
“You do know that the stuff they tell you, that dairy products are for calcium and meat is for iron and protein is all shite don’t you?” I tried “I was anaemic and covered in psoriasis until I tried upping things to ten a day?”
She looked blank again.
“Besides which, my mother is neither vegan nor vegetarian. Her diet is based on raw food principles because that is the better diet. What are you finding unconventional about this?”
Much as I would like to say that veganism suits everyone, generations of meat eating has made the Scottish person more capable of functioning best at about 80 percent, with a bit of fish on top of your raw diet. This, I had imagined, would render my mother safe from the bullshitters that the NHS apparently employ.
“Where does she get her protein?” At last a sensible question.
“Apart from the eggs and fish, she has chia, hemp protein, pea protein, spirulina, linseeds, ground flax in case she cannot crack the linseeds, pumpkin seeds, three kinds of nuts per day. I am also tweaking her amino acids and hormone levels this week in an effort to encourage her to absorb more protein, since you are still hassling me.”
“Your mother likes cake.” she finally tried, after whispering to my mother in an effort to force a confession that indeed, she would rather be over medicated and murdered by the NHS than eat properly. Having ascertained that my mother does indeed hate mince, and lentil soup, she was reduced to accusing me of failing to feed her sufficient cake.
“Her drinks taste of cake every day, they are quite sweet you know.”
“Oh, do they taste different?”
So, the educated dietician had apparently assumed that a drink made from fruit would taste like a juicy fruit chewing gum, apparently. Such is the level of salad dodging in the UK.
After an hour of this bullshit, she gave up and told me that she could find nothing wrong with my mother’s diet, but that she was not allowed by the NHS to say so.
As Wolfe says, medicine that you put in your mouth or on your skin is food, just as eating deep-fried candy bars fails to heal you, medicine does not always do what it says on the tin. The consultant from the hospital who prescribed my mother a pro-inflammatory antacid to counteract the effects of an acid promoting injection to clear her clot, knowing full well that this would require a painkiller and precede a death spiral, did so on the assumption that people just cannot be bothered taking care of their loved ones.
Sadly, this is true in the case of my disgusting family, and so I tell them as little as possible. I can see that the NHS is set up for unmotivated, stupid people who do not want to invest money in health, but I am not one of those people and I refuse to become one of them.
Thanks to the tireless work of the so-called-scammer Wolfe, I am entirely happy to take the NHS on on the basis of their minimal understanding of how the body works when given the correct nutrition. If he wasn’t the exuberant, scatty, shameless self-promoter that he is. I would not have this confidence and ironically I would not have taken my own knowledge seriously.
I am, after all, just a little fat woman on a permanent quest to avoid death. How do I compete with someone who has been trained for years to dispense crap medication and terminate members of the public who live too long according to public health policy?
The post David Wolfe ‘Woo’ versus the NHS Dietitican appeared first on Blogging Ina Disguise.
David Wolfe ‘Woo’ versus the NHS Dietitican
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So, let me get something straight before I start, since readers now are obviously not the same people who were reading me before.
I owe Wolfe a favour. I owed Wolfe a favour before we even spoke. After I got a seemingly rare glimpse of a real person, he decided I was a threat to him and so we have established that Wolfe and I do not get on. If you take a look at the other pages on the site, you will see I have devoted my recent artwork development phase to Wolfe, simply to get his name on about fifty more sites in the course of advertising my books and artwork. So, I have sort of returned my favour, although Wolfe certainly didn’t make me feel particularly valuable as I did it. So, despite the favour being my mother and I being alive, as such being a pretty big favour, I feel I have sort of worked a bit to pay it off.
Since I have never paid him a penny for anything, I am sure Wolfe will feel that this is debatable, but fuck it. I may not have finished the blockbuster due to general self-doubt, caused in no small part to Wolfe being a paranoid dick, but I have done what I can with the emotional baggage available to me.
Having said all that, here is a typical article from a rational person about Wolfe:
Don’t Cry Wolfe: New Age Con-Artistry and Anti-Intellectualism
Feel free to read this, and the follow up before you continue with today’s post. It is the usual superficial understanding of what Wolfe does, whether it is witting or unwitting on his part. Yes, he is driven, yes, he likes money, yes, he has the toughest shell I have ever come across but here’s the thing – if Wolfe was not spectacular, obsessed and an ardent follower of the Jim Rohn school of shameless self-promotion, I would never have heard of him. I and thousands of others would never have had the confidence to spend several hundred hours researching nutrition, and I am sure I am not the only person who would have suffered as a result.
No, life isn’t perfect and yes, natural health is an expensive habit to get into.
However, if you rely on science, conventional medicine and labels to tell you what is and is not good for you you are likely to have a shorter and more miserable life.
This week, I was sent an NHS qualified dietician to tell me that I was not feeding my mother properly. You can see in the previous posts what has just happened with my mother. She was sent home to me dying, on the basis that she would be here for a few weeks and then be taken off to be sedated to death under the NHS ‘Liverpool’ care plan. She had lost contact with her legs, her organs were shutting down, her white cell count was on the decline. She was not in a good way.
The Social Work Department have made a point of not understanding that it is her unconventional diet that has reversed this, to the point that she is now functioning better than she has in years, on a nutrition plan which was devised partly from my dear friend Wolfe, and partly from my own interest in herbalism and nutrition via wherever I can get relevant information. So, she has Ayuverdic, Chinese medicine, Middle Eastern, and bodybuilder’s approaches in her mix. She is now able to communicate with her legs, she has formed muscle where there was merely teabag skin and bone, and she can do sit ups.
Because the district nursing service and social work department have never come across a 90 year old getting well, it has taken two months even to get the services I do want. I have finally scored a physiotherapist to inspect my work and hopefully enhance it in a couple of days time. The dietitian however, was sent to stop me feeding my mother properly.
I am told that old people eat mince and potatoes. My family apparently believe that my mother eats this. As a former Michelin level chef, my mother has not been fed crap like this at home for two decades, even as she sneered at me for being a raw foodist.
“Your diet is unconventional.” the dietician tried.
“So what? How many 90 year olds have you come across that get 7-8 portions of fruit and vegetables per day as a nutritional bottom line?”
“None. Have you tried peanut butter?”
“Peanuts are legumes, and are acidic. Furthermore they encourage fungal infections. She gets three different nuts in her drink every day. Did you know that one Brazil nut contains your entire daily requirement of Selenium? Do you know how important Selenium is?”
She looked blank.
“I also have a very high grade B12 supplement which she takes under her tongue.”
“All old people have a B12 deficiency, we don’t bother about that.”
WTF The NHS does not bother about B12 deficiency? I also had the GP ask me where the carbohydrates were in a drink consisting of Superfoods, fruit, vegetables and honey. What the actual fuck are they teaching these people?
“You do know that the stuff they tell you, that dairy products are for calcium and meat is for iron and protein is all shite don’t you?” I tried “I was anaemic and covered in psoriasis until I tried upping things to ten a day?”
She looked blank again.
“Besides which, my mother is neither vegan nor vegetarian. Her diet is based on raw food principles because that is the better diet. What are you finding unconventional about this?”
Much as I would like to say that veganism suits everyone, generations of meat eating has made the Scottish person more capable of functioning best at about 80 percent, with a bit of fish on top of your raw diet. This, I had imagined, would render my mother safe from the bullshitters that the NHS apparently employ.
“Where does she get her protein?” At last a sensible question.
“Apart from the eggs and fish, she has chia, hemp protein, pea protein, spirulina, linseeds, ground flax in case she cannot crack the linseeds, pumpkin seeds, three kinds of nuts per day. I am also tweaking her amino acids and hormone levels this week in an effort to encourage her to absorb more protein, since you are still hassling me.”
“Your mother likes cake.” she finally tried, after whispering to my mother in an effort to force a confession that indeed, she would rather be over medicated and murdered by the NHS than eat properly. Having ascertained that my mother does indeed hate mince, and lentil soup, she was reduced to accusing me of failing to feed her sufficient cake.
“Her drinks taste of cake every day, they are quite sweet you know.”
“Oh, do they taste different?”
So, the educated dietician had apparently assumed that a drink made from fruit would taste like a juicy fruit chewing gum, apparently. Such is the level of salad dodging in the UK.
After an hour of this bullshit, she gave up and told me that she could find nothing wrong with my mother’s diet, but that she was not allowed by the NHS to say so.
As Wolfe says, medicine that you put in your mouth or on your skin is food, just as eating deep-fried candy bars fails to heal you, medicine does not always do what it says on the tin. The consultant from the hospital who prescribed my mother a pro-inflammatory antacid to counteract the effects of an acid promoting injection to clear her clot, knowing full well that this would require a painkiller and precede a death spiral, did so on the assumption that people just cannot be bothered taking care of their loved ones.
Sadly, this is true in the case of my disgusting family, and so I tell them as little as possible. I can see that the NHS is set up for unmotivated, stupid people who do not want to invest money in health, but I am not one of those people and I refuse to become one of them.
Thanks to the tireless work of the so-called-scammer Wolfe, I am entirely happy to take the NHS on on the basis of their minimal understanding of how the body works when given the correct nutrition. If he wasn’t the exuberant, scatty, shameless self-promoter that he is. I would not have this confidence and ironically I would not have taken my own knowledge seriously.
I am, after all, just a little fat woman on a permanent quest to avoid death. How do I compete with someone who has been trained for years to dispense crap medication and terminate members of the public who live too long according to public health policy?
The post David Wolfe ‘Woo’ versus the NHS Dietitican appeared first on Blogging Ina Disguise.
November 6, 2016
More unemployed furniture! The Conservative Way.
Over the weekend, I have acquired another twenty one unemployed items of furniture, and another three items that I already have lurking in the studio require my attention. This is turning into quite a production line. My garden currently looks as if I am about to host a conference.
I now need another thousand pounds or so of materials in order to give the starving hoardes what they need to get back to work. This is turning into a production line, which is a new concept, considering the length of time I give every piece I make.
I could raid my savings, but I think this is a bad idea, so I am sorting through my wool stock to see if I can dredge up another thousand pounds worth of stuff to sell to pay for the new materials. I am an absolute skinflint, but this usually means I can do what I set out to do without having to borrow anything.
My friend has appeared to lend a hand, and so everything should move a bit faster. Basically the sewing is now going to have to move entirely to my bedroom, and the studio will now have to be given over entirely to the furniture.
Short term, the collections are now Sheep in wolf’s clothing, Jazz, and Beach, classified by the existing carpets, which take the longest. For each major carpet, I will be creating a chair, table, lamp, footstool, box and probably some cushions and mirrors/wall art. Thereafter the idea is that I present the Ina Disguise concept in style groupings, which should make more sense of my uncompromising attitude to design. My heartfelt thanks to Boris, I seem to be a bit more practical and mercurial than I was when it was a simple compulsion.
So tomorrow I will dismantle the conference facilities in my garden, dismantle the studio and bring all the wool up to my bedroom for sorting, the studio will house the furniture and furniture materials, and I will have to look through what remains to find out which bits need to be smashed, which bits can be sold, and generally clean up the dust from the work so far. Then we will be cleaning the first pieces, moving the gaudi chair, which is a very old piece of work into the house for cleaning, moving the items which have been sitting in the studio awaiting my donating them to charity into my office area for selling off to pay for materials. I do miss my shoes, however. Life is better with shoes.
Now I am sure a considerable number of people will think that given that I take care of a very time consuming old lady and a giant property, that I am quite insane for putting this much work into creating more work for myself, but after the experience of the last twenty years or so, I think my future lies in directions other than unemployment and miserable penury followed by death.
Ultimately, I think the games will make more of a living, but in the meantime, making some funky entertaining grown up toy furniture to entertain the FT and Tatler readers sounds like a plan. I do need money for this angle however, which is proving to be a bit of a hurdle at the moment.
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November 2, 2016
Boris the Conservative Muse
First of all, sorry about the lack of posts. I was a bit upset at the whole survey debacle. I had hoped that Scotland had grown out of the divisive poor self image crap that has led, on a personal basis to my being unemployable because I work too hard, and on a national basis, to a bunch of sheep playing follow my leader instead of developing their own political ideas. In addition, twitter decided to block the website, and so it was not really possible to do anything with the site until they actually read their emails.
I cannot see this being successful for the future, and so I choose to simply opt out of the argument. I was posting pro independence posts for long enough before I did the survey, and the response was overwhelmingly negative on both sides. In short, Scotland is a bit fail, and this is unlikely to change within my lifetime.
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It is an interesting process, developing the ina disguise concept for a different person, who has this time been deliberately selected rather than the usual involuntary process. For Boris I have taken a small crowd of unemployed furniture, and rather than starving or threatening it, which would not have worked at all, I have invested time and money in it. (rather a lot of money, I had to sell my back up computers and shoes, amongst other things, to pay for the materials, some of which had to be imported from India)
I am sure any conservative would be delighted that my artwork has never cost anybody else anything. I spent the early part of my life overworking, avoiding having a social life and buying materials. I now have two rooms full of materials and tools, and because I cannot leave the house due to caring for my mother and her property 24/7, I now have time to do something with them. They will also be delighted to hear that we cannot access any of the services we are entitled to, as our local council is so corrupt that they openly admit to gunning for your house and savings if you try to use anything. Basically the only way around this is to not save anything in the course of your life.
Anyway, the Boris development is going to expand the existing threads to the work, so the Boris Experience, as such, has not really started yet. I do like the new ideas and confidence, however. Time will tell if this is a good development.
I did write about fear of status loss being a factor in people’s votes for independence. I have been chewing this over, since it is something I know rather a lot about. A good part of my family’s behaviour towards me and their mother was about status anxiety. I had a frankly crap, and certainly cheap education in comparison to them, and I am the most qualified person in the family.
It seems to me that status is a very destructive thing, to gain and to fear losing. It leads to irrational and poor behaviour towards others. Class is not the problem, money is not the problem. Status, real or imaginary, is the problem. If we start to say ‘fuck status’ where does that leave us?
Probably a lot happier, and certainly more open to new ideas than the miserable people I have had the misfortune to deal with.
I am in Tatler for the December issue, not in person of course. I am sure they will be delighted to have the Boris experience next year.
The post Boris the Conservative Muse appeared first on Ina Disguise - Author.
October 28, 2016
The Boris Experience
Haven’t bothered to write a post recently, as I have been busy working on the first pieces for the Boris Experience, which should be ready next month or so.
I have also changed tack significantly on the visual novel, and I think I will also work on one for David Wolfe as yet another freebie, since this worked relatively well with free books. As a prelude for the game I want to make featuring David, which is a real winner, I think it is probably a good idea, providing he doesn’t get annoyed about it.
The website is now fine according to Google, but Twitter is still not allowing me to post the website and so I have limited use for it. At least it forced me to look into security options.
I think Boris will appreciate the humour in this first set of items, thereafter I will be catching up with some reading for the book which will inevitably accompany the artwork.
In Tatler this month, with the Misery Mandala, so if you are a Tatler reader, look out for that.
My friend is trying to raise money for this bookshop, so if you could circulate this it would help them purchase an offset printer
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