Penny Watson's Blog, page 40
June 10, 2012
Zombies V Nun: Chapter Six
Zombies V Nun: Chapter Six
The Final Chapter
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Pearl whispered a prayer of gratitude as she and Caleb entered the vinter’s courtyard. Thanks to a gated drawbridge and moat, the poor, unfortunate undead people had avoided this area of the convent. It was lucky that Caleb had picked up a pitchfork on the way. He needed it to impale Sister Lucia Leonard, who’d been hanging gleefully on the gate with Sister Alessandra’s head. Now both of them were at the bottom of the pond.
“Oh my goodness,” said...
June 9, 2012
Zombies V Nun: Chapter Five
Zombies V Nun: Chapter Five
Who Needs A Horse When You've Got A Vespa?
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The courtyard reminded Pearl of the old joke…What’s black and white and red all over? Only the punch line wasn’t “a newspaper.” In this instance, the punch line would be “a bunch of undead nuns.”
Staggering about the courtyard like a gang of drunken undead sailors wearing nun habits covered with blood and guts, the sisters turned viciously towards the Vespas.
“Gun it, Pearl! They smell fresh blood!”
Caleb and Pearl tore ma...
June 8, 2012
Zombies V Nun: Chapter Four
Zombies V Nun: Chapter Four
Pearl Learns To Use A Chain-Saw
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…..into a hedge of boxwoods. Luckily, boxwoods were fairly cushy shrubs, although they also offered a bit of support. Caleb and Pearl stood up, brushed themselves off, and sprinted towards the garage.
Caleb flung open the doors and Pearl saw the sweetest sight of her life.
A shiny, cherry red Vespa with a little wicker basket on the back. If it hadn’t been for the gnarled hand sticking out of the basket, it would have been just perf...
June 7, 2012
Zombies V Nun: Chapter Three
Zombies V Nun: Chapter Three
Pearl Gets a Mini-Skirt
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As Pearl and Caleb raced to the tower steps, Pearl became aware of an extremely loud ruckus. It was an odd mix of snarls, screeches and shockingly bad harpsichord music. The music room, which was right next to the dormitory, had legions of zombies hanging from the windows. Young nuns, old nuns, fat nuns and skinny nuns. Attempting to play the triangle. Stab things with flutes. Smashing guitars against the stone wall. And it looked like t...
June 6, 2012
Zombies V Nun: Chapter Two
Zombies V Nun: Chapter Two
Potato Mashers Aren't Just For Mashing Potatoes Anymore
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Pearl was shocked to see Caleb in her room. The Cook never ventured far from the kitchen. But since it appeared that some extraordinary events were occurring, she supposed that this lack of propriety was all right.
“Caleb, zombies aren’t real. They only happen on television shows, and movies, and comic books.” Pearl cleared her throat. “Not that I, personally, have seen any of these disturbing forms of enter...
June 5, 2012
Zombies V Nun: Chapter One
Zombies V Nun: Chapter One
The Zombie Apocalypse
aka, The Adventures of Sister Alessa Chressendra Malika Elizabetta Christenson
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It was windy out, for Christ’s sake.
Sister Melinda Belinda Alessa Chressendra Malika Elizabetta Christenson (known to her close friends as Pearl), stared out the window of her convent room. She was lucky enough to have the “tower” room, where it was rumored that Pope Pius IX had once visited in 1875. Normally, on a We...
June 4, 2012
Hot Tip #297: Review Requests
Promo is tough.
You don't want to sound like a big dork...
"BUY MY BOOK! IT'S FANTABULOUS!"
But you do want folks to hear positive news about your book. Try this instead....
"Penelope gave Soaring Hearts a 5-star review! She said 'It rocked my world...A+!'"
It is ALWAYS more effective to have someone else recommend your book other than yourself. (Or your mother). Authors need reviews. They are a great promotional tool--we can use snippets for our websites, and tweet/facebook glowing quotes. Reader...
June 3, 2012
The Martini Club: Penny's Favorite Summer Brewskis
Now that we've transitioned from spring into summer, I'm no longer drinking so much red wine. Time for an icy cold brewski! My all-time favorite summer brew is Magic Hat #9 from South Burlington, Vermont.
Here's how Magic Hat describes this beer...
"A beer cloaked in secrecy. An ale whose mysterious and unusual palate will swirl across your tongue...A sort of dry, crisp, refreshing, not-quite pale ale." (description, according to the Magic Hat website)
The big secret is actually apricot! It is s...
June 2, 2012
Oops...I Did It Again
Britney would like to wish everyone a very happy Saturday.
Penelope is wondering why red plastic jumpsuits did not take off as a major fashion trend...hmmmm?
Have a great day!Penny
June 1, 2012
Beard of the Day
The History Channel has a new show called Hatfields and McCoys, with Kevin Costner as William Anderson Hatfield. Here's a fun little tidbit about his epic beard....
"It went on one hair at a time, singly laid in," he says of the old-man whiskers he wears for Hatfields and McCoys..."My chin would get poked and prodded for an hour every morning....I'd play music, I'd talk to people, but it never got any easier. Fortunately, it's the best damned beard I've ever had."
(From TV Guide, Inside History...
