Sharmistha Das's Blog, page 3
August 25, 2013
The question still lingers…
Being an immigrant is challenging at many levels, but most of all emotionally. My daughter and I came back from our every-two-year trip to India about a week ago, but I am still not back into the rhythm of life here. Typically, I call my parents once or twice a week but this past week I have called them almost everyday as though hearing their voice and their stories of how much they miss me would transport me in the midst of their loving life. The two weeks, from their eager wait at the airport to see our faces after a long gap to their teary drop-off the day we left, were gone in the blink of an eye.
Eighteen years ago, when I left India in search of a better future, it made sense because India was barely present in the economical map of the world. However, a lot has changed with the roads, buildings, cars and restaurants. The growth of infrastructure, malls, air-conditioned cars, hotels and restaurants has been astounding. Even more astonishing is the spending power of people despite that fact that the prices have multiplied several times over the last few years. I found myself converting the cost of most items into US dollars and muttering, “Really? How do people afford such an expensive lifestyle?”
The question that immediately followed in my mind was, “Are my friends who never left India better off today with their family around them?” After much thought and careful consideration, I answered, “no.” I do not live here because of the cars, homes, malls and highways. I thrive here because I have the freedom to dream the impossible.
But who knows? Even this might change in the foreseeable future, and that’s when my daughter’s dream of living in India might be a reality. “Mama, India is very cozy” was her unflinching answer when I asked her why she wanted to live in India; her reply is a natural reaction for a kid who is smothered with love, care and attention by her grandparents and family members during her stay in India.
Oishi on a rickshaw ( a tricycle as a means of transportation)
Celebrating Independence Day (15th August) in Kolkata
July 5, 2013
Fireworks and Pad Thai
Since Oishi likes to see fireworks, I researched 4th of July fireworks in the nearby towns and found Monroe to be a pragmatic choice; it was not too far from home and Oishi liked the activities – sand art, pony ride and petting zoo. Oishi was also excited about eating out, while I tried to hide my dearth of enthusiasm for eating french fries and hot dogs . I was not despondent but not elated either.
I parked my car in the event parking lot of Thompson Park and unexpectedly and excitedly found myself standing in a bus queue to be transported to the actual event site. It reminded me of my visit to Disney World, where tram cars took us from the parking lot to the park entrance. I thought, “This is a good start. But what about food? Maybe, just maybe, they will have some spicy Asian food…”
In the hot summer afternoon, when the mercury touched 90°F and above, we got down from the bus in front of a large picnic area with clean picnic tables spread out on luscious green grass underneath big trees. I told Oishi, “This looks shady and cool. We will eat here.” We spotted a lake little far away and an artificial beach in front of the lake where a DJ and a group of people, adults included, were entertaining a crowd of people on a gallery around the beach, while a lake breeze tried its best to keep everyone cool. Oishi said, “Mama, this is awesome!”
Being food lovers, we turned our attention towards the food stalls. Oishi’s choice was limited because she became a vegetarian more than a year ago. We saw funnel cakes and french fries, even spicy french fries, and decided to go for the spicy french fries. No sooner had we started walking towards the spicy french fries stall than Oishi looked at me with enlarged eyes and said, “Oh my god, mama, they have Thai food here!” We dashed to the stall, only to find that there were no vegetarian options. Crestfallen, we began leaving the stall, when the chef, who was cooking a few feet away, approached us and offered to make vegetable Pad-Thai for Oishi. Pad Thai is Thai flat rice noodles made with egg, vegetables, peanuts, and soy sauce. It is scrumptious. We were ecstatic and thankful toward the chef. I ordered chicken Pad Thai and Oishi ordered the vegetarian version of the same. To top it off, I found out that the chef teaches Thai cooking class in Spotswood, NJ. I took her card and decided to take her class in the fall.
There was no petting zoo or pony ride due to the heat, but there was sand art. Oishi filled a little monkey with layers of hot pink, red, dark blue, orange, pink, aqua, yellow and purple sand.
After all of that, it was finally time for what we came for. We sat in the gallery and watched the burst of colors illuminate the night sky, while songs like ‘God Bless America’ played in the background.
After the fireworks, when I just started to reminisce about the wonderful day, Oishi asked “Mama, can we have a funnel cake now?” So we bought a cake to share at home before we called it a night.
BELATED HAPPY 4TH OF JULY!!!
June 16, 2013
Happy Father’s Day to Baba
Growing up in a small town in India during the 70s and the 80s, I did not have arguments with my parents because I never knew that was an option. Both my brother and I were expected to obey our parents. Not arguing was particularly difficult with Ma because she was a strict disciplinarian and I had a curious mind. Not surprisingly, despite our many good and loving moments, Ma and I sometimes collided in our ways of thinking and I, not allowed to protest verbally, became upset with her more often than not. Ma never asked what was wrong because she believed in giving me time to cool down.
Baba, on the other hand, simply could not stay away when I was distressed. He lingered around me just to start a conversation. Sometimes it worked, and I started talking to him. And sometimes it didn’t. One of those times, I was lying down with my face covered, and he started to pat my back affectionately, which made me more annoyed. I told him “I don’t want to talk to either you or Ma. So don’t touch me.” He did not stop caressing and calmly said, “I am not touching you. I am patting my daughter.”
We did not observe Father’s Day in India the way most families do now. In fact, I learnt about Father’s Day after I came to America. I wish there was a day called ‘Father’s Day’ back then so that I could have
told him, “Thank you for your unwavering love, unyielding support and unbelievable patience. They made a world of difference in my life.” I did not get a chance to tell him then, so I am telling him today, “Happy Father’s Day, Baba!”
May 19, 2013
My first 5K run
I am not a dog person. Actually, I am not much of a pet person. I adore them for a distance but I am considerably afraid when they come close and this is true for the most well-behaved and playful pets. To my utter embarrassment, I have screamed and ran in fear in the past when they came near me.
Couple of weeks ago, Kendra, a friend of mine, asked me whether I would be interested in a 5K / 3 mile run on May 19th for a charity. I registered, thinking, “Why not?”
When I reached the 6th Annual Hair of the Dog 5K! event location today morning around 9 am, I was stunned to see the number of dogs running for the event. I knew it was a charity for dogs in animal shelter but never imagined that dogs will be part of the running event.
In a few minutes, I found myself surrounded by dogs of all kinds – from the big, majestic Husky to the adorable, cute Pomeranian. Being well-aware of my dog fear, Kendra started to educate me with species names to allay some of my fears.
I looked at her sadly and remarked “I could have picked a different charity where the pets are not going to run with me.” It was drizzling and the weather was cold. So I thought “Do I finish what I came here for today or return home?” In the end, I decided to stay and finish what I started.
Kendra and I walked and ran alternately amid hundreds of dogs along our sides on a narrow road and finished the race in 49 minutes. I was exhausted but proud of myself. This, however, does not mean that my fear has left me for good but it is definitely a step in the right direction.
Before the 5K race
May 13, 2013
How my daughter and Bing teamed Up For Mother’s Day
I came home from work and unlocked the door, expecting my daughter, Oishi to be at her desk doing homework. She had been working on an American History thesis paper for the last two marking periods, and her chosen topic was Music in the Underground Railroad. It was natural for her to do online research on many websites for the paper, but not Amazon.
“Oishi, why are you on Amazon for your research? And why are you using Bing instead of Google?”
“Mama, I had to check something on Amazon, and I use both Bing and Google for my online research. Don’t worry. I have good material for my thesis paper.” With a hint of nervousness, she tried to assure me that her research was on track.
A couple of days ago, when I returned home from work, Oishi looked at me and said, “I cannot keep it a secret any longer, even though I wanted to surprise you on Mother’s Day.” She put her hand inside her school bag and took out a small pouch which had a pair of aqua colored, silver designed, oval shaped earrings.
Ecstatic but perplexed, I asked, “How did you get those?”
“Bing has a rewards program. I opened an account and used it for my research. I accumulated points everyday by searching on Bing, and when I accumulated 525 points, I got five dollars for my Amazon account.”
She gave me the pair of earrings and said, “Happy Early Mother’s Day, Mama!”
