Brandon Stanton's Blog, page 311

"The whole reason I joined the Marines was to get away from a...

"The whole reason I joined the Marines was to get away from a bad situation at home. My older brother was one of the leaders of The Latin Kings gang, and he got sentenced to twelve years in prison. He actually got out of prison just as I was going through the Police Academy, and he even came to my graduation. You know what he told me one time when I visited him in prison, right before I deployed for Iraq? He told me: ‘I’m older than you. But you’re my big brother.’ That was so honest of him, it really fucked me up."

“Before I joined the Marines, I used to perform in high school...

“Before I joined the Marines, I used to perform in high school musicals and sing Doo Wop on the subways— it was the Boyz II Men era, so that was ‘in.’ When I came back from Iraq about ten years ago, I was really depressed and almost homeless. I was too afraid to go out and socialize so I met my wife on Match dot com. I went through the Police Academy and became a cop, but I always remembered how much I loved performing, and wondered what it would have been like to have pursued that life. So during my time off, I started trying to be an actor. I’ve been to hundreds of auditions over the last eight years. I did some Off Broadway. Some Off Off Broadway. I got a lot of ‘Under Five’ roles—- that’s what they call roles that have less than five lines. But then recently I auditioned for a recurring role as Detective Alvarez on the show Gotham. I was in Puerto Rico, celebrating my 39th birthday, when I got a call from my manager. She said: ‘I need you to sit down.’ I said: ‘What’s going on?’ She said: ‘Are you ready for this, Detective Alvarez?’ I said: ‘What are you talking about?’ She said: ‘YOU’RE DETECTIVE FUCKING ALVAREZ.’ I just started crying and hugging my kids and thanking my wife for never giving up on me. With this role, I might not have to be a cop much longer.”

"He likes to take the lead, so I’ve learned to lead more...

"He likes to take the lead, so I’ve learned to lead more quietly."

“I want to build a bridge.”“How do you build a bridge?”“If you...

“I want to build a bridge.”
“How do you build a bridge?”
“If you want to build a bridge it’s going to take a long time and it might be hard because your employees might not be as interested in building the bridge as you are. You have to think about what kind of bridge you want to make. One type of bridge is a suspension bridge and another type of bridge is an arch bridge. The Brooklyn Bridge is a suspension bridge and it was built by John Roebling and his family and that’s all I remember from second grade. And the bridge has to be strong because the water can rise and push up the bridge. I’d maybe like to build a bridge in Wisconsin because there are a lot of people in Wisconsin who might not have bridges but I don’t really know where Wisconsin is.”

“I live a very solitary life. My wife died fifteen years ago....

“I live a very solitary life. My wife died fifteen years ago. All my friends are gone. I try to keep busy. I read, I walk, I watch television.”
“Do you remember the time in your life that you felt most afraid?”
“The first day I arrived in America. I had been a freedom fighter in Hungary. And one day my neighbor told me that I’d been reported and I needed to leave immediately— she was a communist police officer, but also my friend, so she told me to run. My wife did not want to leave her family behind, so she refused to come with me. When I arrived in this country, it was the first time that I’d ever been completely alone.”

“I was worried the divorce was going to destroy my relationship...

“I was worried the divorce was going to destroy my relationship with my children, but it actually ended up improving it. Before the divorce, I was a working father. Work always took priority. I knew that if I had to skip a soccer game for a work meeting, my wife would be able to take the kids to the game. After the divorce, I only got to see my kids every Tuesday night, every other Monday, and every other weekend. It completely changed my mindset— I went from being a working father to being a parent. If there was a work obligation during my time with the kids, I had to change it. I couldn’t spend weekend mornings at the gym anymore, because that would cut into my time. I began cooking dinner on my nights so we could all eat together. The time restraints that the divorce put on me caused me to completely realign my priorities.”

Seen in Washington Square Park

Seen in Washington Square Park

Seen in Washington Square Park

Seen in Washington Square Park

“My happiest moments were way back in childhood. Everything was...

“My happiest moments were way back in childhood. Everything was magical back then. All children are in a constant state of awe and everything is fantastic to them, but then the magical feeling dissipates and reality creeps in. I can strongly remember sitting in my living room in the 60’s, as a kid, watching the television, and crying because I was seeing all those peaceful protesters getting sprayed with water hoses.” 
“When was the last time you felt that magical feeling?”
“Ha! Not since I’ve been an adult, that’s for sure. I mean, I’ve felt happy. I’ve fallen in love. I’ve loved my friends and family. I’ve got a grandkid now. But I wouldn’t describe any of that as a magical feeling. You feel happy for a bit. You see your grandkid be born, and you’re like: ‘That’s great! A grandkid!’ But pretty soon you start thinking about how messed up the world is, and what your grandkid’s life is going to be like, and that feeling dissipates pretty fast.”

"What do you feel most guilty about?""Not finishing my novel....

"What do you feel most guilty about?"
"Not finishing my novel. I’ve already built the room where I’m going to write it at my house in Sag Harbor. The walls of the room are painted Venetian red. It has shelves filled with every book I’ve ever read. There’s a scallop striped Victorian chair. A little pine desk— two feet by three feet, with all my pens lined up, and an 18th Century sang de bouef vase lamp. And there’s a French door with a step that goes out onto the roof so I can look at the clouds. I have everything I need. Except the time."