K. Morris's Blog, page 289

When My Friend Whose Name is Mia

When my friend whose name is Mia
Said, tell me what I want to hear!.
I said, you are witty,
And more than just pretty.
Now please give me back my beer!.

When Visiting My Friend The Squire

When visiting my friend the squire
I met a young housemaid named Moriah.
Who was in a state of undress
Which, I must most earnestly stress,
Had nothing to do with the squire!

You May Speak of Morality

You may speak of morality
But when
Lonely men
Feel their mortality,
What chance
Has philosophise,
When man can
Enjoy The ancient dance,
Of a professionals, calculating, eyes?

When A Young Lady Named Jane

When a young lady named Jane
Said, you ought to die of shame,
Inviting young women in at long gone midnight,
Then, seeing them off by late mornings light!,
I said, but you rang my doorbell, Jane!.

Elastic

When a young lady with morals most elastic
Said, it would be absolutely fantastic
If you could pay my expenses.
Let us have no more pretences!,
I said, my finances are not that elastic!.

The Whig Version of History

There once was a young lady named Mystery
Who believed in the Whig version of history.
She would constantly stress
The inevitability of progress.
But her reasoning, it remains shrouded in mystery!

There Once Was A Young Lady Named Melisa

There once was a young lady named Melisa
Who desired all the men to kiss her.
She was pretty but flighty,
And wore only her nightie.
Shes gone, and all the men miss her!

I Saw Blossom On A Bush

I saw blossom on a bush,
And thought on how many men
Rush,
To entomb,
The bloom!

Whilst Walking Around the Great London Planetarium

Whilst walking around the great London Planetarium
I met a wild eyed Libertarian,
Who said, sir, dont you see
That we must have complete liberty!.
Then he jumped into a passing aquarium!

There Once Was A Man Most Frisky

There once was a man most frisky
Who was fond of women and whisky.
When it came to the judgement day
The lord God did most solemnly say,
You must, for your sinful ways pay.
But, first Ill allow you a whisky!.