Laila Blake's Blog, page 9

The inspiration myth and the limits to writing anyway

It’s been a while since I’ve believed I needed inspiration to write or muse or that sudden urge that drives you into crazy writing highs. I’ve had those, usually because I kept working and some days it’s a bit of a drag and others you couldn’t imagine a more perfect way to spend your time.

I like having a writing routine; I like being accountable to myself – to say: it’s not okay if I just don’t write all day. It’s how I get things done and it’s been working really well. I owe that to the sage advice of many who cured me of any notion that writer’s block exists, or that excuses count for anything, or that I have to wait for a divine intervention to sprout words onto the screen.

This week, though, I think I found a limit to that rule. I finished the first draft of a novella last week and my plan was to let it rest for a week or two, finish up the After Life Lessons edits, work on some other projects that need editing and to spend my daily wordcount on erotic short stories for submission calls. It seemed reasonable. I don’t like stopping in the middle of longer projects to write short stories, and neither am I great at diving into the next big thing without any time to digest the last.

So I made plans, and because I wrote them down and because there’s no such thing as writer’s block and excuses don’t count, I worked on those short stories last week. I also did my last editing run of After Life Lessons and did some mayor rewrites on the first 4 chapters of a YA novel I wrote last year. The short stories, though… they didn’t go so well. I finished one, and got through half of another, but it felt like pulling teeth. And for the life of me, I couldn’t figure out why. This was not supposed to happen. I had cracked the writing secret, hadn’t I?

And yes, this will come as no surprise to anyone but it still took me a week, a lot of self-doubt and bad moods to figure out: I don’t have to be inspired — but I have to be excited. I can force myself to work on something I love even if I don’t feel like it that day, but I can’t force myself to write something I don’t want to work on, something I only write because I put it on a list and rationally, the timing is good, even though I pretty much need a break from erotica after finishing Trading Tides.

My head is already wrapped up in more zombie stories and ideas for the After Life Lessons sequel. It’s spun in fantastically awesome circles coming up with an idea for a YA book about an anarchist witch – and no. I had no awesome, exciting idea for an erotic short. Or, the one I had, was for the submissions call that’s the furthest away, so I benched it and tried to force some others.

I’m not gonna do that anymore. Next week, I’ll concentrate on editing and rewriting. That’s what’s important to me right now – not bragging rights, that I never stood still. That I kept producing, that my word-count at the end of the year will be more impressive than the last. None of that matters to me at all.

And I might have to reread this a few times, to make sure I stick to this. A little force is good – but too much, and you’re just unkind to yourself.

~ ROW80 – Round 1 – Sunday Check-In Week 5 ~

Goal #1: Complete Trading Tides (Driftwood Deeds sequel, ~30k). ♥ On track.

Still sitting on the finished first draft and letting it rest as I planned.

Goal #2: Complete After Life Lessons Edits + get it ready for publication. ♥ On track.

Definitely and absolutely on track. I got through my last copy edits last week and now Lorrie is doing hers — and it looks like we’ll have our clean ARCs next week as planned.

Goal #3: Complete By The Light Of The Moon Edits + get ready for publication.

I decided to edit Where the Wind Settles first, but I edited 4 chapters on that, so I’m pretty happy with that. I realized that the rewrites will be pretty extensive, switching point of view for most of the novel, so it takes time. Feels good though .

Goal #4: Complete Forest Fires edits + start shopping it around. 

Still no changes. And as Lorrie is moving house and already rather overworked, I don’t think we’ll get to it next week either.

Goal #5: Write a total of 80k (on my own) in that time. ♥ On track.

Ish. As I said above, I didn’t write that much last week – I think it was about 4k on short stories and about 3k on rewrites. So, it’s on track, ish, but I wasted a lot of time trying to force something I didn’t want to be doing.

Miscellanea.

- Read 3 books (now up to 11/50)

- Wrote 1,5 short stories.

First Goals Met // Row80

~ ROW80 – Round 1 – Sunday Check-In Week 4 ~

Goal #1: Complete Trading Tides (Driftwood Deeds sequel, ~30k). ♥ On track.

Almost magically, kind of flew through the last third of Trading Tides this week and I just put down the last sentence. I wouldn’t call this goal completed until I let it rest and do one or two editing runs, but it’s definitely way on track. I wrote a whopping 15,500 words on this project, and it came in at almost 35k, all of it written this month. Mostly I’m just crazy proud I finished it in just one month, which I’d hoped for but was a bit unsure about all the same.

Next week, I’m pretty I’m gonna let this rest and see if I have enough distance in two week’s time. I want to to get this to my publisher asap .

Goal #2: Complete After Life Lessons Edits + get it ready for publication. ♥ On track.

Nothing really new to report. I’m still soliciting reviews and blog spots and am really excited about the amount of feedback we’re receiving. That takes up a lot of my time writing emails and putting together information for all different kinds of people.

I made sure everything is ready to go for the blog tour in two weeks, made a lot of graphics and decided on excerpts etc. Mostly clerical stuff .

Next week, I want to go over the formatted copy for one last big check for spelling and formatting issues, and also send out all the info packages I prepared for the promo part of the blog tour.

Goal #3: Complete By The Light Of The Moon Edits + get ready for publication.

I received a letter, officially reverting the rights back to me, so I put the new cover up on goodreads and had a look at the scrivener file (after some drama of me thinking it was all gone. Heart-attack time lol).

However, I have decided to edit a different book first instead. There’s a new #mswl event at the end of February and I wrote this lgbt YA novel last year, that I would really like to try and find an agent for. So… I’ll try to get that ready for querying in the next few weeks, and I might actually push By the Light of the Moon into March. I’m not sure yet. I just know that I definitely don’t want to re-release it before After Life Lessons – and that would push it into May. So I have ample time.

Goal #4: Complete Forest Fires edits + start shopping it around. 

Still no changes. And as Lorrie is moving house and already rather overworked, I don’t think we’ll get to it next week either.

Goal #5: Write a total of 80k (on my own) in that time. ♥ On track.

Not counting the work I did on rewriting After Life Lessons with Lorrie, I wrote 35k in the last four weeks (28 days) – so I’m about 7k ahead on his .

As my main writing project is finished now, I want to spend next week’s word-count on some short stories for erotica submission calls due March 1st.

Miscellanea.

- Wrote a review to participate in Alison Tyler’s Release Blog tour

- Had some good insights from seeing my therapist – which is a first .

- Finished 4 books somehow (now up to 8/50)

- Made accounts on several book retailers in preparation of uploading my freebie Tethered Down next week.

- Had a big idea for a YA book/series about an anarchist teen witch and made a lot of notes about that. This could be fun!

Review: The Delicious Torment / Alison Tyler

Before we launch into a discussion of this rather brilliant novel, I want to say a few things. I owe a lot to Alison; we work together on several anthologies and other projects like her Smut Marathon and I can no way claim an unbiased review. So, I’m just laying that out here – I’m biased. I like Alison. I like her style and her ideas and I like that she’s a genuinely kind and interesting person, which is why I feel confident and happy to endorse her on my blog.

The Delicious Torment is the second installment in a series of books that started last year with Dark Secret Love (which I discussed here). Where the first book follows the vaguely autobiographical heroine Samantha into her first experiences with bdsm, different dominants and sexual partners in an intense journey of self-discovery, The Delicious Torment describes her long-term relationship with Jack, a Dom she committed to at the end of Dark Secret Love.

In terms of my personal reaction, I found it easier to empathize and love Samantha of book one. Her discoveries weren’t exactly like mine, but there was a sense chaos and drive that felt familiar of that time in my own life. In The Delicious Torment we dig deeper into one specific relationship and here, I had to leave a part of me behind, because I did not like Jack (not one bit) and what he and Sam were up to just wasn’t my kink, so to speak.

On the other hand, that allowed me a different kind of enjoyment in the book. I could read it as a novel, not as erotica and I really loved the way Alison set it up, showed us the characters, their flaws and the careful, slow way in which a relationship grows. She is an amazing story-teller and I so appreciate this series for it literary appeal, not just the hot scenes (which it has plenty!).

Jack and Sam moved in together at the end of the first book. He works all day in a high-powered, well-paid profession, while Sam writes at home. And then we meet Alex, Jack’s assistant, who starts to take on tasks that go above and beyond his job – like spanking Sam on Jack’s behest or following her to find out where she goes. This development of trust (and the lack thereof on the part of Jack) is one of the main themes of the novel and I loved the development here, until Sam confronts Jack and they can start to move on. Alex remains however, until Sam finds out how deep his feeling for Jack go and she has to decide whether she is okay with turning their relationship into a triangle.

I loved Alex. Even when he was a little shit, I liked him – or rather is catalytic role in the story. Getting to know him was probably the most emotionally rewarding part of my reading experience and I loved the ending he got (sort of, but we’ll get to that).  I also still adore Sam, she’s strong and interesting and I like reading about her.

Jack, though, well… honestly at this point, I’m rooting she and Alex leave him in the next book. He is the kind of domineering person who seems to crave power in every single aspect of his life (which I already find a little icky) but he seems to feel like it’s fine for him to hold back from Sam, have secrets, cheat, not give her all of him etc. but not for her to do so (obviously). I also don’t think he communicates well, he breaks limits they set together and when she has honest issues, he sort of acknowledges them, but then turns back into domineering Jack, turns them around on her in mind games and power play. He sets up a relationship in which Sam cannot honestly talk to him without the threat of punishment looming over everything – and while, yes, a huge part of her wants that punishment, I did feel like there was a rather dark streak through all of this. I especially disliked how, at the end, he forced her to make a really important decision pretty much on the fly and while they were in an intense scene. That doesn’t feel fair, that kind of play really messes with your head for a while and I think honest communication about the relationship has to exist apart from that side of things or it starts to feel abusive — like actually quite a few things he did throughout the book.

So that’s how I felt reading it. The book gave me insight into a world of bdsm I will never personally know, but that is vastly fascinating to read about – even and maybe especially the darker elements of it. And on top of that it was a brilliantly crafted and well-written story. I love the honesty in this series, the lack of frills to dress it up in order to make it more accessible – it is what it is, and I love it!

You can purchase a copy pretty much anywhere where they sell books and I’d recommend it to anyone who wants a deeper and more honest, unglossed view into the world of sadomasochism and bdsm in general.

Alison Tyler | Cleis Press

Amazon | B&N | Goodreads

Always amping up // ROW80 Week 3

~ ROW80 – Round 1 – Sunday Check-In Week 3 ~

Goal #1: Complete Trading Tides (Driftwood Deeds sequel, ~30k). ♥ On track.

I’m definitely back on track here, got some good amount of words in this week and, more importantly, I fixed an issue I was having. I love outlines, but sometimes they really have to stay flexible to accommodate some changes. I really love where it’s going now. I’m at 20k, wrote about 9k this week and hope to finish it maybe next week, depending on how much work piles in at Goal #2.

Goal #2: Complete After Life Lessons Edits + get it ready for publication. ♥ On track.

Still on track here as well – I spent the week garnering support and promotional opportunities and we’re still going strong. I also kept working on the homepage, and fixed a few tiny continuity issues in the manuscript.

If anyone is interested in signing up for an advance review copy, let me know!

Once Lorrie is through with her edits, I’ll use next week for format it for kindle and nook so that we can go over it one last time, both for spelling and formatting issues.

Goal #3: Complete By The Light Of The Moon Edits + get ready for publication.

No changes. I’m still waiting on the official rights reversal.

Goal #4: Complete Forest Fires edits + start shopping it around. 

No changes, but I’m missing this project like crazy. So, I’m all amped up.

Goal #5: Write a total of 80k (on my own) in that time. ♥ On track.

I wrote about 9k this week, which is not as good as it could be, but I like having room for improvement. That doesn’t quite make up for last week’s slump, but I’m on track this week.

Miscellanea.

- Completed a translation project

- Did a lot of spring cleaning

- Finished 2 books (now up to 4/50)

- Worked on an over-arching cover-design for my Breaking in Waves trilogy

- completed edits on the short story Tethered Down and created a cover

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Remember my big New Year’s Giveaway, go enter now or it won’t be much of a contest . And if you bought or received a free copy of Driftwood Deeds (or downloaded one somewhere lol), I also have a giveaway for those of you kind enough to leave a review of it.

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Reading from Driftwood Deeds

I’m about half-way through penning the sequel, and Driftwood Deeds is still going strong. It has received some good reviews on goodreads and I couldn’t be more happy about the way it is turning out.

Today, I decided to read the first two chapters and I hope you enjoy it!

Driftwood Deeds – Audio Sample

http://www.lailablake.com/Podcast/waiwow/DD_sample.mp3

(or click here for the direct link: bit.ly/1aP6IPJ)

Please remember that I am still hosting a give-away until the end of the month – which is drawing ever closer! Find all info below.

a Rafflecopter giveaway

Sometimes splitting my attention is hard… // ROW80 Week II wrap-up

~ ROW80 – Round 1 – Sunday Check-In Week 2 ~

Goal #1: Complete Trading Tides (Driftwood Deeds sequel, ~30k).

I meant to write 10k on here this week and I managed about 2k. So… not on track. Better next week. But I worked out the issue I was stuck on and it should be smoother sailing from here on out.

Goal #2: Complete After Life Lessons Edits + get it ready for publication. ♥ On track.

This goal was my priority this week. I finished one editing round of all 24 chapters (or about 80k), I finalized the cover, set it up on goodreads and started writing to a LOT of blogs in the hope that they will review and promote it in the following months.

I also started designing our micro-publishing house website at www.liltliterary.com.

Goal #3: Complete By The Light Of The Moon Edits + get ready for publication.

No changes.

Goal #4: Complete Forest Fires edits + start shopping it around. 

No changes.

Goal #5: Write a total of 80k (on my own) in that time.

I actually wrote about 2k in fresh words, so I need to pick it up next week.

Miscellanea.

- Edited, formatted and published a mini-anthology of erotic stories. It is called Escaping the Day, and can be purchased on Amazon and Smashwords, or is available for free to anyone who signs up for my newsletter.

- Completed a few homepage updates/newsletter updates.

- Wrote a pitch for an article and sent it to RT book reviews.

- Taught myself about formatting ebooks.

- and I also got very far in my spring cleaning efforts and my apartment looks lovely.

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Remember my big New Year’s Giveaway, go enter now or it won’t be much of a contest . And if you bought or received a free copy of Driftwood Deeds (or downloaded one somewhere lol), I also have a giveaway for those of you kind enough to leave a review of it.

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Discussing Driftwood Deeds: Subs and Agency

This post was originally published on Eroticaforall, in the course of my release tour.

 

Giving a Sub Agency

In the real world, the sociological term of human agency defines the ability of humans to make choices and to enact these choices upon the world. In this way, a person with agency can change or influence the conditions of their institution or society. We all know some of the great examples where a single person has changed a lot about the world in which they live – from Alexander the Great to Henry VIII all the way to Rosa Parks. But it doesn’t have to be something quite as large. Human agency can be found in choosing where to live, what to do with your life and who to spend time with etc. In societies, secularist democratic models afford humans agency where strict religious or totalitarian models reduce human agency, i.e. limit their choices and the ability to affect the world in which they live.

In fiction, a character’s agency is their ability to influence the plot. Characters who only react, do as they are told and never come up with ideas, just follow the lead have very little agency, whereas those who make choices, come up with plans and who shape the plot through these choices and ideas have a high degree of agency. Usually we find the highest degree of agency in the protagonist(s).

Now, this is where the obvious problem arises when we’re writing or reading about submissives. Their very nature, the very thing they crave is to be led, to not make decisions – and so they are often left with hardly any agency and are perceived as weak, sometimes even pointless. Even though this desire to submit may be shared by the reader, most of us still find it intellectually difficult to truly enjoy and like a character with no agency.

So how can we give submissive characters agency without taking away the fantasy of being led?

- Making it very clear that she submits because she WANTS to submit, not because he wants her to or because she is expected to.

- Giving her an emotional and intellectual thought process about submission, and the ability to express them to reader and dominant alike. In this way she can shape the experience with him.

- Showing that the dominant’s agency is also absolutely limited by her limits, consent and willingness to submit to him.

And that’s it really. Personally, I like to stray away from scenarios like clubs or auctions in which a sub’s agency is further limited by not being allowed to choose her partner, but even there it can be employed quite easily when we remember what agency is and how it works. Happy bdsm’ing everybody!

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Remember my big New Year’s Giveaway, go enter now or it won’t be much of a contest  . And if you bought or received a free copy of Driftwood Deeds (or downloaded one somewhere lol), I also have a giveaway for those of you kind enough to leave a review of it.

Driftwood Deeds is available on Amazon.com, B&N, ARe Romance and Smashwords.

Not much to brag about // ROW80 Week I wrap-up

For those of you who like to like to look in on what I do from day to day, these Row80 posts will be perfect, for the rest (and I assume majority), feel free to ignore them. They are mostly for me and other participants to stay on track and hold ourselves accountable and productive in our efforts.

~ ROW80 – Round 1 – Sunday Check-In Week 1 ~

Goal #1: Complete Trading Tides (Driftwood Deeds sequel, ~30k). ♥ On track.

This is the goal I worked on most this week. I created a semi-detailed outline, wrote a little over a thousand words every day, and reached 10k this morning. I would like to do the same again next week, so that I’m well-set to finish the first draft within the month.

I also made a Pinterest inspiration board and a playlist – but that probably counts under procrastination rather than work.

Goal #2: Complete After Life Lessons Edits + get it ready for publication. ♥ On track.

I also spent quite some time on this goal. L.C. Spoering and I completed about 8k worth of rewrites after deciding to condense the first quarter of the novel from six chapters into three.

We also decided on a release date (April 8th 2014), wrote a blurb, and bought a picture for the cover art.

In the next week, I want to continue this round of edits, necessitated by the changes wrought in the beginning and start contacting blogs for cover reveal promotion and early review sign-ups.

Goal #3: Complete By The Light Of The Moon Edits + get ready for publication. ♥ On track.

As the order of the goals, suggests, this is currently not my highest priority. This week, I didn’t do any actual writing, but worked on behind the scenes admin, facilitating the reversal of my rights. So far this has gone remarkably smoothly and may happen much faster than I thought it would. With any luck, I’ll have it officially in writing by next week and online retailers will take By the Light of the Moon off their virtual shelves.

I’ve also been working on the cover again, and feel like after a few rough starts of using the artwork I commissioned, I’m finally headed in a good direction.

Goal #4: Complete Forest Fires edits + start shopping it around. 

Unless stray thoughts and notes about the future of this series count (and they don’t), I haven’t done a single thing here, this week. It probably won’t be a priority next week, either.

Goal #5: Write a total of 80k (on my own) in that time. ♥ On track.

Counting Monday through Sunday, this week, and only my own projects (i.e. currently just Trading Tides), I wrote 8700 words. It’s really not anything to brag about, but it puts me pretty smoothly on track to finish this goal.

Goal #6: Start a new project with L.C. Spoering, as well as one of my own.

Obviously, this (very, very vague) goal has lowest priority and I don’t know which series we’re going to work on. There was some thought of a small zombie apocalypse anthology to give away as a freebie, but we also can’t seem to tear our butts away from the Mona Ceol series. However, I don’t plan on working on this goal until February.

For my own project, I will most likely power through the Driftwood Deeds series. I’m planning on writing the third novella (titled: Saltwater Skin) in February/March as well.

Miscellanea.

- Worked out terms for the release of Tethered Down with my lovely publisher Harper Bliss. The 6k erotic shortstory will come out as a freebie in the next few weeks. We also started work on a hot little cover for it and I wrote a blurb.

- Completed quite a few homepage updates, time-swallowers like that.

- Finished reading my first two books this year, also setting me on track to read the 50 I challenged myself to finish.

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Remember my big New Year’s Giveaway, go enter now or it won’t be much of a contest . And if you bought or received a free copy of Driftwood Deeds (or downloaded one somewhere lol), I also have a giveaway for those of you kind enough to leave a review of it.

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Discussing Driftwood Deeds: Bdsm and Feminism

A few months ago, I came across a brilliant little text image on pinterest that read “My bdsm will be feminist – or it will be bullshit.” Suffice to say, it hit home like any other major first-pumping moments of my life, sparking something like “Oh my god, yes!” in my happy little head.

by Shiri Eisner

I grew up always feeling the tension between the two – being sub and being feminist. It can be a bit of a mindfuck (pun intended ). For a long time, my feminist side was almost asexual; on feminist days, porn and stories, even fantasies did nothing for me. And then I had sub days, sub weeks, or months where feminism kind of went out of the picture for a while. It took me years to understand how to combine both and how that affects my bdsm for the better, just like that quote read.

Now here are some ways to make bdsm fiction feminist and empowring, and not – as many claim – reinforments of the patriarchy:

1.  Giving the sub agency.

For me, I do like a sub that has a feeling of innocence, I understand the appeal, especially because this way the reader can be introduced to bdsm alongside her – but she can still have agency. She can be educated, funny and aware of what is going on. She can voice opinions and discuss what they are doing together.

2. Consent and Communication

Now, I think all bdsm should rest on this – but because books often have a very accelerated time-frame for the relationship, we sometimes lose this a little bit. I love seeing happy, enthusiastic consent and enjoyment of the bdsm deeds. I also love it when they both talk about out it, and reflect on it together.

3. A truly respectful Dominant

There is a lot of thought going into how a sub shows respect to her Dom, but I think the other way around has to come across just as much. If he honestly respects her as a person, as a woman, for her intelligence or caring or skills etc. I will root for him through the entire story and, almost as importantly, I will respect her for choosing well.

So there we go. I tried to do all that in Driftwood Deeds, tried to create a hero I can root for and a heroine who walks that line between innocense and empowerment. It ended up being such a positive and exciting experince that I can’t wait to share it with readers and see how they feel!

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Remember my big New Year’s Giveaway, go enter now or it won’t be much of a contest  . And if you bought or received a free copy of Driftwood Deeds (or downloaded one somewhere lol), I also have a giveaway for those of you kind enough to leave a review of it.

Driftwood Deeds is available on Amazon.com, ARe Romance and Smashwords.

 

Hey, 2014 guess what. I’m in you!

First resolution: Learn to listen to blog gurus about actually descriptive titles.

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Mock-Up Cover After Life Lessons
Planned Release in Spring 2014

A few days ago, I wrote a retrospective on 2013 and not only did I promise some words on resolutions and plans, the mere rules of symmetry kind of require it. So here we are, in 2014, and although New Years is always a bit of a let down if – like me – you never quite give up on that sudden, tabula-rasa-like new beginning, it’s still a nice time to take stock and to plan improving on whatever I found on that list. So here we go.

In general: Write more, publish more, get better at everything . It’s that simple.

This year I also intend to spend some time with the wonderful people of ROW80 – which is a year-long challenge, taking place in 4 rounds of 80 days each. It includes writing down measurable goals for each round. So here’s round #1.

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~ ROW80 – Round 1 – Goals ~

 

Complete Trading Tides (Driftwood Deeds sequel, ~30k)
Complete After Life Lessons Edits + get it ready for publication
Complete By The Light Of The Moon Edits + get ready for publication
Complete Forest Fires edits + start shopping it around
Write a total of 80k (on my own) in that time.
Start a new project with L.C. Spoering.

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Remember my big New Year’s Giveaway, go enter now or it won’t be much of a contest . And if you bought or received a free copy of Driftwood Deeds (or downloaded one somewhere lol), I also have a giveaway for those of you kind enough to leave a review of it.

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