Debi Gray Walter's Blog, page 6

About Elias

Yesterday I invited questions from readers, and I received some outstanding ones. Thank you all!

Tamara asked about our youngest grandson Elias.

Our daughter and her husband were expecting their first baby on January 29, 2021. Tom and I were so excited to finally visit them in Arkansas to see Heather pregnant. It was such a happy anticipation to welcome grand baby #9 and watch Matt and Heather receive the blessing of parenthood.

After our wonderful visit. I got a phone from her saying the doctor was putting her on bed rest. I flew out to take care of her and to help keep her baby safe and secure.

But what we didn’t realize was God was working to rescue Elias from a virus he had contracted during the first trimester called CMV. Babies that go full term with this virus often have very serious health disabilities including hearing loss, lung, liver and brain damage. Some don’t survive.

Elias Angel was born on October 14, 2020, at 24 weeks and 5 days. He was 1 lb 6.6 ozs and 12” long. Roughly the size of a water bottle.

Elias and Ollie Octopus

“For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well.”
‭‭Psalm‬ ‭139:13-14‬ ‭ESV‬‬

The NICU staff was amazing. Our daughter calls them God’s angels. They began Elias on medication right away to fight the effects of CMV. Everyday he surprised all of us making forward progress.

From his little NICU cubicle we were able to watch God do what He normally does in the “secret place” as Psalm 139 declares. We were in awe of this miracle being formed before us.

He was in the NICU a total of 115 days. When Matt and Heather were finally able to drive him home from Oklahoma to Arkansas (a two hour drive), Papa and Nana were there waiting to see and hold him for the first time. What a moment that was!

He was so tiny and quiet. The ventilator and his immature core muscles made his voice very weak. The only way we knew he was crying was when his heart rate monitor would go off. His care required 24 hour diligence with feeds and medications.

Fast forward to today, Elias…

Is still making forward progress, thanks to an amazing team of doctors and therapistscan hear wellcan see and recognize peopleHas the cutest personalityLoves to belly laugh (still quiet but now he’s audible)Is trying his best to crawlIs eating baby foodHas two teethLoves booksAnd kisses Mommy every chance he gets

His prognosis is wait and see. Every child in his condition is unique. There are no certainties. But one thing we know! But God! He has been leading every step of Elias’ treatment since the day He was conceived. He is our miracle baby and one whom we call our Tiny Warrior.

He now weighs over 14 lbs at 13 months of age.

I write a song for each of my grandchildren. This is Elias’ song, sung to the tune, Jesus Loves The Little Children…

Nana loves Elias Angel. He’s as sweet as he can be. When he was born he won my heart, tiny warrior from the start. I thank God He brought you to our family!

This is my 23rd post in The Ultimate Blog Challenge to write everyday in November.

An Invitation

Our Micro-preemie Grandson’s, Elias, first time
seeing our Christmas tree.

First of all, thanks for coming my blog and reading about whatever is on my heart for the day.

I have a favor to ask of you! Now that you are here, what would you like to know? What question would you like answered or discussed? What is causing the most pain for you right now? Go on, Ask Me Anything!

I will select one or two and answer them if I’m able.

So, leave a comment below and ask me a question! Thanks for taking the time to consider and comment.

This is post #22 in The Ultimate Blog Challenge to post everyday in November.

The Power of Words

When we moved into our neighborhood in 1992 our children were 10, 8 and 6. We had a cat named Bunny and a guinea pig named Cupcake. I homeschooled all of our kids since day one and this neighborhood was full of other homeschooling families. It was so nice to be able to plan things together and not feel so isolated.

Imagine my disappointment when we went to our first HOA meeting.

The air was so tense neighbors were using it to fling lots of complaints and insults at each other, many of which were warranted. But still. There is a positive way to say things that produce results. This was not working. I had an idea but had to ask myself if this was a challenge I was willing to take.

I asked the HOA President if he would be open to me starting a neighborhood newsletter. I told him I could say what needed to be said in a way that would be more “hearer friendly”. Since things were so volatile, he was more than will to let me try. I said I would never be on the HOA so my words would always be from one neighbor to another, not from the Board make directives to the “homemoaners”.

Our Sun newsletter began in 1999 with the byline, “helping our neighborhood shine”.

It was more of a hope than a reality. But I knew the power of words, and this was a challenge that would have tremendous rewards. Not only for our quality of life, but for our property values too.

It began as a monthly newsletter. I write a regular piece for the front page that focuses on the importance of being a good neighbor. Other regular columns are from the HOA President, the Architectural Review Board highlighting Yard of the Season, and our Neighborhood Watch report. The last page is the Kids page with seasonal jokes, puzzles and challenges.

As the years have passed we have changed the newsletter to be distributed quarterly. Some have suggested we go digital, but honestly we have found people are more likely to read a colorful newsletter dropped at their door, then they are to click a link on their computer.

Our neighborhood was established in the early 80’s. The fact that our HOA is still being run by neighbors who volunteer their time for a year commitment is an anomaly. It’s even more so that our board gets along well. When there is a disagreement we have learned how to work it through in a civil way.

Words have the power to tear down.

We’ve seen this more so on social media in recent years. And we can never take those words back. It is best to use our words to build up and say what needs to be said without a pointing finger.

Our pastor says, “Every time you point a finger at someone remember there are three more pointing back at you.” Which goes with the saying, “Better to remove the log from your own eye before going after the speck in your brother’s eye.”

We are all capable of tearing down or building up. This challenge was to see if a simple newsletter could shine the light of kindness on a battlefield and bring peace. I’m thrilled to say it did, and our neighborhood is shining all the brighter as a result.

What challenge have you taken and found positive results?

This is the 21st post in The Ultimate Blog Challenge to post everyday in November.

Once Upon A Blog

My husband and I started blogging on The Romantic Vineyard in 2008. It was an extension of our marriage ministry and was initially meant to be a reference site for our friends and those who live locally for date night ideas and great resources. It didn’t take long for it to become much bigger than we ever expected. With the growth came new friends who also had marriage blogs–couples who shared the same vision and passion to see marriages become all God intended and to last a lifetime.

These couples ended up becoming friends. We read each other’s blogs regularly. We encouraged one another and did all we could to help as well. We even ended up meeting most of them in person. What a joy it was to finally meet face-to-face.

We saw a need as many new marriage bloggers became discouraged in their first year. They struggled with either lack of technical understanding, or difficult responses to posts they had written. Isolation made many call it quits. So we formed the Christian Marriage Bloggers Association. We have a statement of faith we all believe in and it’s from this creed that visitors to our blogs know if we line up with their beliefs too. It has broadened our community and we are thrilled at what God has done.

When we began in 2008, there were very few Christian marriage blogs available offering help and good Biblical advice. Now, fourteen years later and there are too many to count. And many are so helpful.

When we were prompted to share the blogs we follow regularly, I knew I had to include the background in order for you to understand how I came to know and respect these bloggers/now friends.

We have a Core Team. These consist of the 6 couples who began the CMBA.

Paul and Lori Byerly – They have several blogs devoted to marriage: The Generous Husband, The Generous Wife, The XY Code Brad and Kate Aldrich – One Flesh MarriageScott and Jenni Means – Heaven Made MarriageJulie Sibert – Intimacy in MarriageChris Taylor – Honeycomb and Spice

I also love to read good writers blogs. Some of the following are friends and some are columnists. But I read every post.

Life on the Lighter Side – Bonnie Anderson has been a friend for as long as I can remember. We share many interests, which makes any time we have together a blast. Her blog is inspirational and humor focused. Not That Big A Deal – Roxanne Chin is another dear friend who always makes me laugh. Her humor is usually pointing inward on something she said or did. And I think she’s a pretty big deal. Sean of the South – Sean Dietrich’s biography linked here has enough credentials to draw you closer. His storytelling skills are unmatched. I look forward to his posts; I will laugh, cry and think about what he’s written for a while afterward.The Power of Story – Mitch Teemley found our marriage blog and commented. Which let me find his and I am so very grateful. He is a fantastic storyteller. His Fool’s Odyssey series is one hooked me. You can start this with his first post, My Big Epiphany in London

This is my 20th post in The Ultimate Blog Challenge to post everyday in November.

Four for a Dollar

This post was originally shared on The Romantic Vineyard blog in November 2010. I thought it was worth sharing in the UBC on Day 19. Enjoy…

It was the week of Thanksgiving, and I was set on trying a new creamed corn recipe for the holiday.  Having a large extended family I was going to need a lot of corn – 24 ears to be exact.  I knew that the grocery stores would be too expensive for such a large quantity; so my husband and I headed towards a roadside vegetable stand.   I was sure that their candy corn, as it’s called, would help me duplicate the dish I had so enjoyed at a New Orleans’ restaurant, Commander’s Palace.

Off we went.  We stopped at the first stand we came to, and I scouted out the market to see if they had what I needed.  They did and at the right price, too; four ears for a dollar!  My husband stayed in the car certain it would only take a moment to make my purchase.

I bagged my corn and took it to the man working the checkout counter.  He looked a bit odd, but seemed friendly enough.

“Hi!” I smiled as I placed my corn on the table in front of him.  “I have 24 ears of corn in the bags.”

He looked at me while figuring my total in his head, “That’ll be $21!”

“$21? The sign said that the corn is four ears for a dollar!”

“That’s right – $21.”  He said with a toothless grin.

I knew he just wasn’t thinking, so I attempted to help him with his figuring.  “The sign says four ears for a dollar – that’s eight ears for two dollars, twelve ears for three dollars…”

I thought he would have stopped me by this point, but it was obvious by the unbelieving smirk on his face that he still wasn’t getting it.

I continued, “sixteen ears for four dollars, twenty ears for five dollars and twenty-four ears for six dollars!”

“Naw! You’re tryin’ to cheat me!” was his reply.

I couldn’t believe it!  Was he joking with me?  Was there a hidden camera somewhere? He was serious and so convinced in his mind to the point that he wasn’t going to sell me the corn!

I asked, while looking around, “Is there anyone else that works here?”

Before he could answer me I saw a couple of men sitting at the far end of the stand. I walked up to them and asked if they worked there.

The owner replied, “Is he giving you a hard time, darlin’?”

“Well, he’s trying to sell me 24 ears of corn for $21.” I still couldn’t believe this was actually happening.

“Man, he hit his head yesterday and must’ve hurt himself worse than I thought.  Come with me!”

I followed him as he approached the checkout counter.  “Mac, I want you to sell this lady her corn for $6, ya hear?”

He took my corn from under the counter and still hesitated in taking my money.  He kept staring suspiciously at me, and when his boss had walked away he said under his breath, “You must’ve really winked your eye at him!”

With that I took my bag of corn before he could grab it from me and quickly got in the car.
As I closed the door and took an exasperated breath, my husband said, “What took you so long?”

“You won’t believe it…”

Do you have an unbelievable story to tell?

A Family at Feud

Photo Credit You Tube

It seems only right that I should share this with you now, on this week before Thanksgiving. Family Memories are what this holiday is all about and we have one that may outlive us!

My sister-in-law, Sherry, called with an idea to do something we’d never done before. It would include my daughter, Tracy, my daughter-in-love, Ashley, and my niece, Amy. Five total to do it.

The application was made and we waited.

When the call back came we were told to make a video telling them why we wanted to do this thing we’d never done before.

Since we live in the tourist capital of the world, we loaded up in one car and drove to Universal Studios. What better place to make a video?

We laughed more that night than we ever had. We kept asking ourselves, “What in the world are we doing?“

We turned in our hilarious video and we waited.

We received another call that they wanted to see us in person at, of all places, Universal Studios! Now it all seemed possible.

And it was. In 2010, the five of us appeared in the inaugural season of Steve Harvey’s Family Feud. All of our spouses watched from the audience as we attempted to answer ridiculous questions as the Top 100 survey respondents would.

Embarrassing to say the least.

The TV audience never sees what happens when the camera is ordered to “cut!” That is when the “comedian Steve Harvey” appears and shares stories not meant for television.

Many times I thought the producer of the show was going bust from laughing so hard. Steve was unpredictable when off-script and unleashed. She had to let him flow with his stream of thought or he would bust.

And we watched it all as our daughter was many times the brunt of his jokes. He called her “Crazy Tracy” mainly because she knew how to play and answered how she thought the those surveyed would answer. Not how she personally would.

We ended up being on 5 episodes, won the car and $25K. Those five shows were replayed over and over for years! We haven’t received any Facebook messages recently with the familiar, “I just saw you on Family Feud!” so maybe after 11 years it’s settled.

Are we glad we did it? Absolutely. Knowing what we know now about how it went would we do it again? I’m not sure. But we made a lasting memory in our family, and I got new bedroom furniture with my part of the pot. Not bad for 5 hours of embarrassing moments.

You can watch one of the outtakes on You Tube here.

This is my 18th post in The Ultimate Blog Challenge to post everyday in November.

My Top Twenty Loves

Today’s prompt is a great post to follow yesterday’s, I Hate Pandas, post. What do I love? This could be an entire month’s challenge because I have so many. I’ll give you the list first and then hone in on one of them.

God above all else. I spend the first hour of the morning with Him and reading His Word through the You Version Bible app on my phone. It is free and full of great devotionals too.My husband of 42 years. Besides God, He is my why in all I do. My three grown children and their spouses. I call them my “in-loves” because I love them, it’s not just a legal connection.My nine grand-children. They are each unique and I couldn’t enjoy being involved in their lives more.My hometown. Orlando has changed dramatically since I was born here in 1959. But it’s still home to me. My extended family and the history we all share, including our grandparent’s 32 acres of groves west of Orlando. Writing: Books, articles, blogs, newsletters (both neighborhood and Nana’s newsletter for my kiddos)The beach The mountainsTraveling and/or Road TripsBirdingPhotographyPlanning events like parties, neighborhood events (the pandemic provided me with lots of opportunities to help with all of us being homebound.Baking is my first love in the kitchen. My Mom wouldn’t let me cook since she used the pressure cooker to make meals fast after a full day at work. So I learned to bake. Favorite thing to bake? PiesCooking and having themed dinner parties. Favorite meal to make? Anything my husband loves. One of his favorites is Chicken Cacciatore. Golf. Reading, but this one often takes a backseat to all my other loves. I can get completely lost in a book, so it always feels selfish to block everything out to read. Researchiing about things I don’t know–geneology, history, song lyrics I may remember wrong ThanksgivingChristmas

When Tom and I were first married he worked in retail. He was the area manager for 3 jewelry stores and I hadn’t yet found a job. I spent much of my time in our yellow-carpeted condo alone. Being such an extrovert this was hard. And I had moved away from another one of my loves–Orlando–to Bradenton, 2.5 hours away on the west coast of Florida. I was lonely and homesick.

The couple who managed the property where we lived was always home. She was such a kind lady and one day she asked if I’d like to come over and bake bread together? I jumped at the chance to have something to do and baking was always a favorite.

She started with helping me learn how bread dough should feel after kneading it. She was a hands-on teacher and this is how I learn best. I caught on quickly and was soon making homemade bread, hamburger buns and more. You just can’t beat the aroma of bread baking in the oven on a chilly day.

Next she moved on to a more challenging lesson – the art of making a flaky pie crust. She even shared her family recipe with me. I had no idea how this one day and this first pie would define my baking life. i.g. our family always celebrated birthdays with pie instead of cakes. It became our dessert of choice and for good reason. Mrs. L’s pie crust recipe is amazing.

So of all the pies I’ve baked, which is our family’s favorite? Apple Pie. It even won the blue ribbon at our county fair.

Debi Walter’s Blue Ribbon Apple Pie

INGREDIENTS

6-8 honey crisp apples1/2 cup all-purpose flour1 cup granulated sugar2 T. cinnamon1/4 t. ground clovesNutmeg, freshly ground, about 1/8 t.ButterMilk and Sugar for the top crust

DIRECTIONS

Preheat over to 400.

Roll out pie crust and line the bottom of a 9″ deep dish pie plate. Core, peel and slice thin the apples in a large bowl. Pour sugar over apple and stir to coat. Pour in flour next and stir to coat. Add spices and stir well. You can add more spices to your liking. We like a lot of spices in ours.

Fill the lined pie plate by layer the apples one by one in a circular pattern starting from the outside to the center. Repeat this layering until you have filled the pie using all the apples. Dot with butter.

Roll out remaining pie dough and cover the apples, sealing and crimping the edges.

With a pastry brush lightly brush top crust with milk making sure it doesn’t pool. Sprinkle lightly with sugar.

Bake for 15 minutes. Reduce heat to 350 and bake for an additional 45 minutes until bubbly. I keep a watch on the pie and usually lay a large sheet of foil over it to prevent over-browning.

Let pie cool completely before slicing to have a nice and neat slice of pie. But if you can’t wait, it’s great warm out of the oven with vanilla ice cream.

Bon Appetit

This is my 17th post in The Ultimate Blog Challenge to post everyday in November.

I Hate Pandas

Please share

Now before you click away, let me explain. I am an animal lover and panda bears are the cutest. I was even able to visit the National Zoo in Washington D.C. as a kid to see the two pandas China loaned to us in the 70’s.

So why do I hate PANDAS? It is an acronym for what our 12 year old granddaughter came down with in the summer of 2019. It stands for Pediatric Autoimmune Neuropsychiatric Disorder Associated with Strep. That is a mouthful for the most horrific time in our family’s life.

When we were given the prompt to talk about an adversity we had endured, I knew what I would write about. I’m just not sure I can tell the whole story–partly because this is my granddaughter’s story. It’s her’s to tell when she is ready and old enough to process it all. And partly because it’s hard to go there. So for the sake of getting the word out about this disorder and to help other’s who may be facing it and not know it yet, I will share my Nana’s heart on the matter.

I got a phone from my daughter telling me how concerned she was about her oldest daughter. She told me she woke up one morning paranoid, crying, in severe pain and unable to get herself dressed for school.

You must know a little background: she is a driven young lady, makes good grades, plays volleyball and loves the independence she is gaining as a pre-teen. But suddenly she reverted back to a 6 year old. She couldn’t write in cursive. She no longer remembered her multiplication tables and she stopped eating and drinking. She had an unfounded fear of water, so she wouldn’t wash her hair, brush her teeth or drink it unless forced.

In a few short weeks she was unrecognizable and we were all afraid.

Our daughter and her husband were frantically seeking the medical community’s advice through multiple ER visits and pediatrician appointments. But she was declining so rapidly it became impossible to get her to leave the house. She lost 14 pounds in just a few weeks time because she wouldn’t eat. She was fading from us. But God.

Finally while searching for answers, they found a 20/20 special on ABC that featured a story about this strange psychotic response children were having after having strep throat. Our granddaughter had just recovered from a strep infection a couple of weeks before this began. They were drawn to finish watching to find out more, and it was hard to do. The way this disorder effects different children is like having a front row seat to a horror movie, but the characters are children you love.

This show was the answer they needed that led them to a pediatric neurologist in Washington D.C. (ironic given my first paragraph). Miraculously they were accepted by the doctor and she cleared her schedule to see our granddaughter. She said that our granddaughter was one of the worst cases she had ever seen, but since they got her to treatment quickly she was confident she would recover. She also added, but it might take two years.

The most frightening part of all this was not being able to rely on the medical community for the help she needed. Several times the emergency room doctors wanted to admit her to the psychiatric ward. They even questioned our daughter and son-in-law’s quality of care. It was hard to know who to trust. Unfortunately, many still haven’t heard of PANDAS, and insurance doesn’t cover the expenses either. It was difficult on so many levels. This is why I tell my part of the story as often as I can and to whoever will listen.

It has now been two years and our granddaughter is fully recovered, like her doctor said. It took time, treatments and lots of donations given by friends and family to see her through. But God! He orchestrated every detail and every step. He carried us through this dark valley of the shadow of death and rescued her from the grip of PANDAS.

For more information on PANDAS please visit the Pandas Network website. And if you know of any children who suffer with strep on a recurring basis, make sure they get retested after their initial round of antibiotics to make sure it is gone. I hate PANDAS and will do anything I can to get the word out. Please share this post if you feel so led. This Nana is grateful our precious granddaughter has recovered. Not all children do; their nightmare continues…

This is my 16th post in The Ultimate Blog Challenge to post everyday in November.

Photo by Fabian Centeno on Unsplash

Many Publishing Options, Which One To Choose

Our prompt is to share with you something we have to offer. Hmm. I had to think about this for a while. Then, I realized that I haven’t finished telling you the story about my experience in publishing my first book.

I shared about how I needed to hurry to publish my book in my post, 10 years. What I didn’t tell you is how I ended up with my new publisher, Prevail Press.

My first publisher made my book available, but I had no help in the marketing aspect of the book, other than ideas on how to tell others about it. It was discouraging to say the least. All that work yet no one could find it. I ended up giving away lots of copies with the hopes they would tell others which would lead to more sales.

Mind you, I never wrote this book with making money in mind. I just wanted to recap how much money we spent on the initial print, which was significant. And I wasn’t anywhere close!

I have been a part of a Writer’s Group for nearly 20 years. It was my involvement and growth in this group that led me to the next step in my publishing journey.

Rob Swanson, who leads our writer’s group got the idea to begin a publishing company that doesn’t work anything like a typical vanity press or self-publishing company.

First of all, he is selective on the quality of writers accepted to publish through Prevail Press. He does this to protect the reputation of his company. Good books draw good customers. And a relationship of trust grows.

Secondly, by switching to Prevail Press I didn’t have to buy hundreds of copies of my book. My book was now available in a print on demand format as well as an ebook, so the overhead cost was minimal. An added benefit when you don’t have a lot of money to invest in the first place.

Thirdly, I make more royalties per book than I did previously. There really are so many more benefits with this method than my previous publishing experience.

Finally, Prevail Press is a micro-publishing company and is in my opinion the BEST OPTION for up and coming authors, unless you are able to secure an agent and go the traditional publishing route. Not all authors who make a submission to Prevail Press are selected, but you can begin the process by reading the Submission Guidelines.

We now have two books available through Prevail Press–Through The Eyes Of Grace, an historical fiction, and Cherishing Us – a book by my husband and me offering 365 healthy marriage tips to help your relationship grow.

In case you don’t know, Tom and I have had a marriage blog, The Romantic Vineyard, for the last 14 years. It has been our passion to help marriages grow strong to last a lifetime. We hope you’ll stop by and visit there when you have the time. We offer date night ideas, date night questions, and lots of resources to help you succeed at loving your spouse well.

I also encourage you to check out the other authors published through PP. There are some outstanding books you might really enjoy. Check out the offerings here.

This is my 15th post in The Ultimate Blog Challenge to post everyday in November.

Pause

Photo from LAWD in Apopka, FL

Lake Apopka is one of the largest lakes in Florida. It just so happens that we live 15 minutes away from its shores.

A few years ago our state began an extensive cleanup of this lake that was overgrown with algae. This was caused by the muck farms that lined the shores of the lake for decades.

The work began by buying the surrounding land and turning it into a wetland project to naturally filter the polluted lake.

All this effort is working.

On Friday, Saturday and Sundays as well as National holidays, they open the area for nature lovers to drive through the 11 mile restoration project. The speed limit is 10 mph and the road is a one-way gravel road. Photographers and nature lovers come from all over the state to slow down and breathe in the restoration—of the lake and their own souls.

This morning my husband and I decided to take the drive. Our life has been quite stressed and it does us both good to hear nothing but the gallinules calling through the wetlands.

Today was different for we woke to dense fog. We weren’t sure how much we would see, but we needed to try.

What a surprise was waiting for us. Normally we see over a hundred Gators prowling the waters. We see water fowl of all kinds and turtles and fish. An Eden of sorts with all kinds of teeming wildlife.

Fog. It settled on the water allowing glimpses of the beauty we normally don’t notice. Since we couldn’t see the details we observed the landscape as a whole and it took our breath away. I’ll let the photos draw you in to our experience. I pray your Sunday will be blessed through my lens.

If you ever come to Orlando, please reserve time to visit the Lake Apopka Wildlife Drive. It will refresh your soul and enrich your mind. We all need to take a pause from life and let God help us focus our gaze on His handiwork. It is marvelous in our eyes!

“…wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well.” – Psalm 139:14b ESV

This is Day 14 in The Ultimate Blog Challenge to post every day in November.