L.A. Lewandowski's Blog: The Culture and Cuisine Club, page 12

Pappardelle with Mixed Wild Mushrooms

A mushroom sauce.

This is a fantastic recipe and one of the most delicious dishes ever served at the Culture and Cuisine Club dinners.

Our friends made the pasta, a real treat, and it was light and absorbed the flavors of the sauce perfectly.
The chef suggested a bit less mushrooms–he felt they overpowered the other flavors in the sauce.

Ingredients

1/2 cup dried porcini mushrooms (about 1/2 ounce)
2/3 cup boiling water
8 ounces uncooked pappardelle pasta or bucatini
3 1/4 teaspoons salt, divided
1 tablespoon olive oil
1/4 cup finely chopped shallots
2 (4-ounce) packages exotic mushroom blend, sliced or coarsely chopped
2 garlic cloves, minced
2 tablespoons dry sherry
2 ounces Parmigiano-Reggiano cheese, divided
1/4 cup heavy whipping cream
1 teaspoon finely chopped fresh sage
1/2 teaspoon cracked black pepper
1 teaspoon truffle oil
Sage leaves (optional)

Preparation
 Rinse porcini thoroughly. Combine porcini and 2/3 cup boiling water in a bowl; cover and let stand 30 minutes. Drain in a sieve over a bowl, reserving 1/4 cup soaking liquid. Chop porcini.
 Cook pasta with 1 tablespoon salt in boiling water 10 minutes or until al dente; drain in a colander over a bowl, reserving 1/4 cup cooking liquid.
Heat oil in a large skillet over medium-high heat. Add shallots, mushroom blend, and garlic; sauté 5 minutes, stirring frequently. Stir in porcini, sherry, and remaining 1/4 teaspoon salt; cook 1 minute or until the liquid evaporates.
 Finely grate 1 ounce cheese; crumble remaining cheese. Reduce heat to medium. Stir pasta, 1/4 cup reserved cooking liquid, 1/4 cup reserved porcini soaking liquid, 1/4 cup grated cheese, cream, chopped sage, and pepper into mushroom mixture; toss well to combine. Drizzle with truffle oil; toss. Place about 1 1/4 cups pasta mixture on each of 4 plates; top each serving with about 1 tablespoon crumbled cheese. Garnish with sage leaves, if desired.

Tropical Storm Andrea Slow Cooker Pork

Slow cooker pork in applesauce.

When June 1st hits the weather in Florida takes a sudden turn. Like clockwork, the humidity is back along with the heavy rain. The meteorologists grin on TV as they talk about the next named storm, and we all watch and follow the pretty swirls of color, wondering whether we will get hit.

The thing is, in the midst of all the uncertainty we still need to eat. And, isn’t it a good idea to plan a scrumptious meal ahead, get some writing done, and let the slow cooker do the work?

That is exactly what I did. After perusing lots of on-line recipes I made an apple pork barbeque that was delicious. It was a big hit with the guys.

 

Ingredients:

1-4 pound pork butt     Kosher salt     Freshly ground black pepper     cinnamon   24 ounces cinnamon applesauce     4 Granny Smith sliced apples, cored with skin on     2-3 Tbs cider vinegar     1 red onion chopped

Rub the pork butt with the Kosher salt and the pepper. Layer the sliced apples in the bottom of a slow cooker, cover with red onion, sprinkle lightly with about one teaspoon of ground cinnamon. Put roast on top. In a small bowl mix applesauce with cider vinegar and pour over the top of the roast. Sprinkle with a little cinnamon.

Set your crock pot to a 6 or 8 hour setting. Serve with green beans and Jasmine rice. Yum!

You will have enough for sandwiches the next day so buy rolls in advance.

Authors Eat…

This month the Culture and Cuisine Club features the bubbly and perennially fun Carol Wyer. Carol is an award-winning author of three books including the newly released “How Not to Murder Your Grumpy.” Carol currently resides in  the United Kingdom. Throughout her life she has traveled extensively, and she successfully adds a cultural richness to her writing. She spends a great deal of time in her adopted country, France, with her husband. Lucky lady!

In Carol’s own words, here is her recipe for a luscious Bouillabaisse.

I am a terrible cook. Honestly, I really am. Whatever I cook has to be simple. One of my greatest achievements was cooking a Bouillabaisse for a group of ten people, when I lived in Casablanca. It was my turn to host the monthly expat dinner party and rather foolishly I asked the guests what they would like to eat. One of them, a French girl, suggested Bouillabaisse because she missed France. The others thought this was a great idea and so I had to find out pretty quickly how to make it.

I asked the French girl how to cook it since she came from Marseille, considered the Mecca of Bouillabaisse, and knew what to do.  The morning of the dinner party, I drove down to the far side of Casablanca along with half the city to purchase the ingredients fresh off the boats as they pulled in. I rode back to the apartment at breakneck speed on my VeloSolex bike with clams and shellfish wheezing in plastic bags dangling from my bike handles, followed  the recipe and voila! That night my culinary dish was applauded and the French girl told me it was some of the best Bouillabaisse she had ever eaten. I have made the dish quite a few times since, adapting it to suit where I live and what I can purchase, but you really need to get very fresh fish to make it ultra tasty..

Hubby doesn’t like shellfish so I haven’t cooked it in a long while, but I still have that crumpled up piece of paper with the recipe scrawled on it just in case I ever get asked to cook it again.

In Marseille they use at least seven types of fish in a Bouillabaisse. If you can’t get extremely fresh fish – caught and cooked the same day – then use quick frozen fish. That’ll be fish frozen on the day it was caught. You can use almost any combination of fish you fancy and use as many different types of fish as you can. The bouillabaisse is often served with a spicy sauce. It is up to you if you want to make it or not. (I didn’t.)

Bouillabaisse Ingredients

3 pounds of at least 3 different kinds of fish fillets, fresh or quick frozen (thaw first)
1/2 cup olive oil
1-2 pounds of oysters, clams, or mussels
1 cup cooked shrimps, crab, lobster meat, or rock lobster tails
1 cup thinly sliced onions
4 shallots, thinly sliced
2 cloves garlic, crushed
1 large tomato, chopped, or 1/2 cup canned tomatoes
1 sweet red pepper, chopped
4 stalks thinly sliced celery
1 teaspoon of fennel seed
3 sprigs fresh thyme or 3/4 teaspoon dried thyme
1 bay leaf
2-3 whole cloves
Zest of half an orange
1/2 teaspoon powdered saffron
2 teaspoons salt
1/4 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper
1 cup fish broth
2 Tbps lemon juice
2/3 cup white wine
Sliced French bread

Ingredients for Sauce Rouille (Not compulsory.)

1 Tbsp hot fish stock
2 cloves peeled garlic
1 small red hot pepper
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/4 cup soft white bread in small pieces
1/2 cup olive oil

 

Put hot fish stock or clam broth into a blender. Add garlic and red hot pepper, salt and bread. Blend until very smooth. Add olive oil slowly and stop the blending as soon as the oil disappears. At serving time, serve the sauce Rouille in a little bowl next to the bouillabaisse. It is strong so don’t use much! Don’t put more than ½ teaspoon into your soup.

 

Bouillabaise

1 Heat 1/4 cup of the olive oil in a large saucepan. When it is hot, add onions and shallots. Sauté for a minute, then add crushed garlic, and sweet red pepper. Add tomato, celery, and fennel. Stir the vegetables into the oil with a wooden spoon until well coated. Then add another 1/4 cup of olive oil, thyme, bay leaf, cloves and the orange zest. Cook until the onion is soft and golden but not brown.

2 Cut fish fillets into 2-inch pieces. Add the pieces of fish and 2 cups of water to the vegetable mixture. Bring to a boil, reduce heat and simmer, uncovered, for about 10 minutes. Add your shellfish, crabmeat, lobster tails.

3 Add saffron (it was ridiculously inexpensive in Morocco so I added a generous portion), salt, pepper. Add fish broth, lemon juice, and white wine. Bring to a simmer again and cook about 5 minutes longer.

4 At serving time place a thick slice of crusty French bread in each bowl. Spoon the bouillabaisse over the bread. If desired, serve with Sauce Rouille.

Serves 6 approximately.

Carol’s new novel, “How Not to Murder Your Grumpy” will be released on June 1, 2013.

Is your Grumpy Old Man getting under your feet? Is he wrestling with retirement? Are you wondering if you should bundle him up and entrust him to basket-weaving classes? Then this book could be the answer to your prayers. This light hearted guide is packed full of lively ideas, anecdotes and quips. Not only does it set out to provide laughs, but offers over 700 ideas and ways to keep a Grumpy Old Man occupied. From collecting airline sick bags to zorbing, you will be sure to find an absorbing pastime for your beloved curmudgeon. There are examples of those who have faced extraordinary challenges in older age, fascinating facts to interest a reluctant partner and innovative ideas drizzled, of course, with a large dollop of humor. Written tongue-in-cheek, this book succeeds in proving that getting older doesn’t mean the end of life or having fun. It provides amusing answers to the question, “How on Earth will my husband fill in his time in his retirement?” It offers suggestions on what might, or most certainly might not, amuse him. Ideal for trivia buffs, those approaching retirement, (or just at a loose end) and frustrated women who have an irritable male on their hands, this book will lighten any mood and may even prevent the odd murder.

You can find this book in both the UK and in the US in book shops and on Amazon. To find out more about Carol and her books please check out the following links:

Links to sites and purchase links for book.

Amazon UK Author Page :                                                                                                     http://www.amazon.co.uk/Carol-E.-Wyer/e/B005U34XNM/ref=ntt_dp_epwbk_0

Amazon US Author Page :                                                                                           http://www.amazon.com/Carol-E.-Wyer/e/B005U34XNM/ref=ntt_dp_epwbk_0

Blog: http://facing50withhumour.com

 

 

 

 

 

A Room With A View

This post previously appeared at Indies Unlimited.



I am writing in the rain. My computer is exactly eighteen inches from my office window.Outside, the trellis is heavy with climbing jasmine and trained plumbago. The soft sounds of the falling rain are echoed in the movement of the leaves they pelt.

I am warm and dry, yet somehow a part of the dripping scene in front of me. This landscape has been my food for the day, a rich diet of wet leaves, green vistas, and periwinkle blue flowers.

Writers need to be nourished. We are, after all, artists. To create we must refuel our tanks. To “find our art” as Pablo Picasso famously said, we must be able to draw in, process, and send out a piece of ourselves.

How one does this is entirely dependent on the personality of the individual. We writers are a unique lot — and what refreshes one will exhaust another. I have listed some of my favorite ways to keep the words I am looking for flowing freely.

Physical exercise is the first “go to” for me when I am stuck. An hour hitting tennis balls on the ball machine has clarified plot flow time and time again. Yoga is another practice that consistently provides the answer I am looking for. I would like to think it is the movement, but I suspect that it is the happy endorphins allowing my unconscious to solve the problem for me. For this reason when I am writing I get up every hour and a half and move around. I time myself, and after fifteen minutes are up I am back to my story. It is also a great way to accomplish those little things you don’t ever get to. Just make sure you watch the clock and go back to your desk when the time is up.

Laughing is another way to free the mind. A writer I know has posted lots of Grumpy Kitty photos and videos, and I suspect he enjoys watching them as much as sharing them. The physiology of laughing provides stress relief that has been tied to longer life. I know that, after a long day, I want to watch something funny on TV. Family Guy and the Big Bang Theory are two favorites that never cease to accomplish their goal.

A popular Floridian author, Randy Wayne White, is also an adventurer and avid water sports participant. What better way to end a day spent indoors at his desk developing his character, Marion “Doc” Ford, than by paddleboarding at a beach near his home on Sanibel Island. He is a successful restauranteur, and just for fun invented his own brand of hot sauce. He writes every day, but knows that, for him, time spent at the beach recharges his spirit.

Visiting a museum, listening to music, or reading, be it a classic or a contemporary novel, are other ways to stay relaxed, focused, and fed. I like to read while I eat lunch, feeding my body and soul at the same time. Because I like lists I have included a link to a site with “50 books you must read.”

This eclectic list inspired me to make 2013 the year that I filled in some gaps in my reading. How could I have seen The Maltese Falcon a hundred times and never read the book? How could I call myself a Hemingway devotee without understanding the struggles of The Old Man and The Sea? How could the movie Laura, an American film noir of cult status, be my favorite movie if I haven’t read the words of Vera Caspary? Oscar Wilde’s masterpiece, The Picture of Dorian Gray, provides a glorious buffet of a cruel dandy’s privileged existence and pulls us willingly into the debauchery and decline of so promising a golden boy. I read the 1890 version contained in the Norton Critical Edition, slowly, and it encouraged me to go back to my first novel and clean what I was unhappy with. What is good for Oscar is good for Lois.

Gardening and especially working on my orchids provides me with hours of contemplation. There are a few tricks to growing orchids, but once you have mastered them it is amazingly easy to have flowers that last for months. I tried to grow roses, but it was a tedious schedule of rotating chemical sprays as they constantly contracted sooty mold and bugs. In Florida orchids are a better choice, and I love to hear from people who have followed my tips and now grow their own. Nurturing these odd-looking plants into producing stunning blooms gives me a sense of accomplishment that I channel back into my WIP.

My 2013 orchids.

Cooking, specifically chopping, is another great way to kill two birds with one stone. My husband calls me the “freelancer” because I will throw things together as the mood strikes me. He is not complaining, however. I must admit I am a very good cook, except for rice and breakfast potatoes. Rice requires that you follow directions, and I need cooking to be unconfined. My husband makes the rice, and I do the rest. I have become fond of using the slow cooker, which is the ideal solution for busy writers. Throwing lots of things in a pot and letting slow heat and time do the work is ideal. Don’t think in the limited terms of cans of mushroom soup, unless that is what you want. The Internet is full of gourmet suggestions. I take my breaks to stir what is in the crock-pot, re-season, and maybe add a little of something that the recipe didn’t ask for.

Intimacy is another way to find inspiration. Indies Unlimited is a safe for work site, so I will leave this topic to your imagination.

Sometimes, the act of speaking aloud about a character or scene and getting some constructive feedback from another writer, is all it takes to feel refreshed and anxious to return to your computer. Having a person like this in your life is a luxury and a blessing I wish for every dedicated writer.

I hope these ideas help you to get the nourishment you need to create and produce work you and your readers will love.

About L. A. Lewandowski

Lois Lewandowski graduated from Rutgers University with a degree in Political Science and French Literature. A passion for life lived well is reflected in her first novel, “Born to Die-The Montauk Murders”, a glimpse into the world of the beau monde. Her second novel, “My Gentleman Vampire: The Undead Have Style”, introduces a new breed of fabulous, tango dancing undead. Lois enjoys the sun in beautiful Tampa, Florida. Learn more at her lifestyle blog, and her Amazon author page.

27 THOUGHTS ON “A ROOM WITH A VIEW”




TD McKinnon on May 9, 2013 at 6:41 pm said:

I think you have covered most of what makes me tick with your own list, Lois.

• Physical exercise: karate or, if I’m feeling especially wound up, beating the hell out of a full length bag.

• Meditation: static or tai chi.

• Laughing: watching our cats, Big Bang, or old Seinfeld episodes.

• Outdoors: I used to do stuff like skiing, driving fast, horse riding, water skiing, climbing, parachuting etc. However, these days a walk in virgin forest or along a lonely beach does the trick.

• Reading: a good book; sometimes that can be one I’ve read more than once.

• Movie: same as above.

• Music: these days it has to be something that I consider to be good music; my favourite contemporary is Dire Straights, my favourite classical is Mozart.

• Cooking: In 1963 I was one of seven boys who petitioned and got the right to have cooking lessons, instead of metalwork and woodwork, a first in the UK school system. I almost became a chef, I still love cooking.

• Intimacy and the perfect person to sound off: I’m incredibly fortunate (third time lucky).

I don’t do the gardening bit is all; I like to leave nature to its own devices.

Excellent post. Lois.

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bevrobitaion May 9, 2013 at 10:04 pm said:

Now that’s weird, TD. In 1963 I was one of 7 girls who won the right to take metalwork and woodwork lessons in my UK school instead of cooking and sewing. Made the same request when I moved to NZ at age 13 and carried on with it there. Good thing my husband is great at sewing!

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TD McKinnonon May 9, 2013 at 11:32 pm said:

Isn’t choice a wonderful thing, Bev.

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TD McKinnonon May 9, 2013 at 11:30 pm said:

That should of course be Dire Straits

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Lois Lewandowskion May 10, 2013 at 5:54 am said:

I love Dire Straits.

My husband is a wonderful griller. A man who cooks is comfortable with himself, and smart. When the going gets tough you can feed yourself well!

Thank you for sharing your list. We are very similar.

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Yvonne Hertzberger on May 9, 2013 at 7:43 pm said:

Gardening is a favourite of mine. I have only one orchid but it has bloomed four years in a row now – that last bloom lasted 4 months – Dec. to April. You’ve painted some beautiful relaxing pictures here. Think I won’t need that bubble bath now. 

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Lois Lewandowskion May 10, 2013 at 6:01 am said:

I would of guessed you were a gardener, Yvonne. Gardening takes patience, and one needs to be able to see and sometimes sense what the plant needs. You are a thoughtful and kind person.

The orchid you describe is “happy.” I have one, the purple dendrobium in the picture above, that is always in bloom. A friend came to see my orchids and started to tell me how I should replant it to a bigger pot, etc. Why would I do that? When it stops blooming I’ll think about it…

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Yvonne Hertzbergeron May 10, 2013 at 6:54 am said:

Aw, thank you Lois. My orchid is the same colour as the one at the back of your pic that is a light magenta, the long sprig. It’s never been repotted either. I garden more by instinct than by science, so you may have something there. Aside from my veggies all of my gardens are drought resistant perennials – good karma for the environment.

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lynnecantwell7 on May 9, 2013 at 8:59 pm said:

Your orchids are beautiful, Lois. I don’t have much luck with plants. Usually I can only keep two; if I get more, they start to die off ’til I’m back down to two. For a short while, I was able to trick them by putting two in each room, but somehow they caught on. 

My recharging methods of choice are reading and knitting.

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Lois Lewandowskion May 10, 2013 at 6:53 am said:

I suspected that my orchids talked to each other. 

I really think it is all about the light. Once they start to re-bloom I don’t move them.

They also seem to like music.

Knitting seems like a very relaxing hobby. And, you can make pretty things for yourself or others.

Thanks for stopping by.

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Massimo Marino on May 10, 2013 at 12:09 am said:

Nice piece of your life, Lois. Many things in common.

I have the luck to live in the countryside and have a clear view on the Alps and the Mount Blanc. Sometimes it is enough to sit in the garden with my cats, and watch, listen, breath.

Even strolling in our garden helping my wife, she’s the green thumb in the family, or taking a break with an episode of my favourite series. My first novel has been instrumental of making me watch the whole 8 seasons of “24″ 

Reading of course is a must, where to find all the words otherwise?

Blessed be.

Massimo

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Lois Lewandowskion May 10, 2013 at 6:57 am said:

Hello Massimo,

I love the mountains, and your vista sounds lovely. There is so much to appreciate in nature, free gifts we can observe and pull into our souls.

I haven’t watched “24″, but I will look into it.

Thank you for your comments.

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glynissmy1 on May 10, 2013 at 1:11 am said:

What a beautiful post. Cross stitch. If I draw blank with my writing, I pick up my cross stitch. You can guarantee that as soon as I get to an intricate piece, my muse kicks in, and I have to write again.

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Lois Lewandowski on May 10, 2013 at 7:04 am said:

Good morning,

Glynis is a beautiful name for a writer.

My mother did cross stitch, and I cherish the items I have of her work. Isn’t it interesting that instead of fighting for the words, a relaxing pursuit encourages your muse to return. He must get jealous of your attention being focused elsewhere.

Have a lovely day.

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Mel Parish on May 10, 2013 at 7:30 am said:

Great post Lois

.

My list includes:

Travel by train or bus

Walking

Knitting

and when there’s an opportunity:

Painting walls (with a brush)

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Lois Lewandowski on May 10, 2013 at 7:44 am said:

Hi Mel,

Travel by train or bus is a wonderful way to slow down and appreciate the journey. It is also the perfect opportunity to people watch.

I haven’t painted in a very long time. I would love to be able to do murals, but then every wall in my house would be covered with flowers!

Thanks for your comments.

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Mel Parishon May 10, 2013 at 9:02 am said:

Unfortunately I have no artistic ability whatsoever when it comes to painting – so I’m talking about just decorating with one color!

Given I don’t have to concentrate on the task too hard, I just let my mind wander and usually my characters appear to keep me company.

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PeterPrasad@Twitter.com on May 10, 2013 at 8:21 am said:

SWEET KISSES. I yanked two lines to Tweet. God ur smart. I yanked the orchids to pin. God, you can grow things.

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Lois Lewandowskion May 10, 2013 at 9:15 am said:

Thank you, Peter, I appreciate the re-tweet!

With all those lovely compliments I must immediately return to the WIP with renewed confidence.

Have a great day.

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RG Bud Phelps on May 10, 2013 at 10:08 am said:

Your opening lines to this piece were great!

“Outside, the trellis is heavy with climbing jasmine and trained plumbago. The soft sounds of the falling rain are echoed in the movement of the leaves they pelt. I am warm and dry, yet somehow a part of the dripping scene in front of me. This landscape has been my food for the day, a rich diet of wet leaves, green vistas, and periwinkle blue flowers.”

What an opening for a story! I enjoyed the variety of things you use to re-charge your batteries and actually found some that I have used myself. No matter what we are doing, writing or working on a special project, we need something to deviate from the task at hand to give us a new perspective. Thanks for sharing, we all need some encouragement to go forward.

Keep up your good perspective on life.

RG Bud

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Lois Lewandowskion May 10, 2013 at 11:52 am said:

Hi Bud,

Thank you for your kind words.

It is a beautiful day in Tampa. In only a few weeks the humidity will be high and any gardening is done very early in the morning. Fortunately, I can still watch what is going on from my office window.

I am glad you stopped by. I haven’t been on the old LI threads recently. I started one of my own about Pinterest, my new passion.

God bless. 

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laurieboris@earthlink.net on May 10, 2013 at 7:54 pm said:

Lovely post, Lois, and beautiful imagery. For writing energy, I turn to exercise (swimming, strength training, and long walks in my hilly neighborhood), Big Bang reruns (funny how so many of us like this), and washing dishes.

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Lois Lewandowskion May 11, 2013 at 7:55 am said:

Hi Laurie,

I am not surprised to see “The Bang Theory” included on your list. 

A household chore like washing dishes kills two birds with one stone; I sometimes polish furniture when I take my fifteen minute break. Or when I can’t sleep at night.

The area where you live must be a great place to walk, especially at this time of year when all the plants are waking up.

Thank you for adding to the list of writer’s recharging techniques

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kristalynn on May 11, 2013 at 12:09 pm said:

Okay, you’ve spurred me on. I have never read Moby Dick, so I just checked it out of the library.

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Lois Lewandowskion May 11, 2013 at 4:58 pm said:

Hi Krista,

After you read Moby Dick, read the contemporary novel Ahab’s Wife. A very good book.

Thanks for stopping by. 

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Helen Haught Fanick on May 15, 2013 at 1:16 pm said:

Lois, you’ve inspired me to start by straightening up my writing room. Thanks!

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Lois Lewandowskion May 19, 2013 at 2:30 pm said:

I’m happy I inspired you to organize, just remember to go back to writing. 

The Cockroach Games

This post appeared previously at Indies unlimited.

The Cockroach Games
Posted on April 11, 2013 by L. A. Lewandowski

“I believe that once we are all gone, Keith Richards will still be here… with five cockroaches saying ‘you know I smoked your uncle, did you know that?’” – Robin Williams

My last author blog post on Indies Unlimited was about being born and raised in the state of New Jersey.

I truly love living in my adopted state of Florida, and as I read the comments from my readers I decided to write about one of my first Floridian encounters with the king of Darwinian theory, the American Cockroach.

There are thousands of types of cockroaches. The oldest cockroach fossil dates back 350 million years. It is believed that our modern day pests are quite similar to their ancestors.

The first time I ever saw a cockroach was in Newark Airport as an adult. The cold northern winters kill off most of the bigger specimens. I was raised to believe that if you had cockroaches you were a poor housekeeper. In the south this is not necessarily the case. Without a freezing winter to kill them off these hardy insects thrive and grow to spectacular sizes.

When we moved to Florida we lived in a ground floor apartment. I was pregnant and expanding rapidly, so I was thrilled to avoid the steep stairs of the second floor residences. One night, or perhaps early in the morning, I needed to use the bathroom that was close by our bedroom. As I sat, a huge cockroach, at least four inches long, ran across the wall and hid behind the hand towels. I screamed bloody murder and my husband ran in to investigate. He tried to whack the intruder, but he was a speedy devil. (A cockroach can run up to three miles per hour and turn 25 times in one second. The best way to stop them is Windex, but that is another story.) He streaked across the wall and disappeared. My husband looked all over the bathroom for him, and finally gave up.

“He’s gone, Honey. I’m going back to bed, I have to work tomorrow.”

I knew better. An insect doesn’t get that big by being stupid. His impressive size was a testament to his superior survival skills. He was here, oh yes, and I would get him. The adrenaline coursed through my body and I was the hunter. I needed to think like a cockroach, nay, I must become a cockroach. Only by putting myself in his cerciwould I defeat my enemy.

I surveyed the bathroom. He was not near the ceiling, nor was he anywhere at eye level. I turned slowly, a full 360 degrees, taking one final look before I slowly rested my Buddha-bellied body on the throw rug. That is when I saw him. The crafty son of a gun had flattened his body upside down under the lip of the countertop by the sink. Nonchalantly I turned my back to him, (cockroaches have a nerve that runs down their back allowing them to sense danger from behind), rolled up a magazine, and launched my attack. I whacked three times under the counter with the fashion magazine, my stylish weapon of choice. His mutilated carcass fell to the floor and I felt the surge of military success. Victory was mine! Finally, I could sleep. The only collateral damage was the ruined Vogue.

As I remember this encounter I will admit how much I like the idea of giving animals, reptiles, and insects human characteristics, personalities, and well-honed survival instincts. On Indies Unlimited a recent flash fiction challenge required the writer to imagine an unassuming turtle that caused radioactive aging. This was my first foray into a writing challenge of this sort. It is a very helpful exercise in parsing one’s words, much like writing a book synopsis.

Are there books where cockroaches are the main character? I am familiar with Kafka’s “The Metamorphosis”. With all due respect, I am more interested in reading a humorous or science fiction story. In the movie Men in Black I always thought the bug was a brilliant addition to the plot line. “Put the sugar in the water.”  Hilarious.

I am fascinated with the idea of a story where the main character encounters a bug or an insect that gives him a run for his money. I would love to read a tale where a bug, like the gopher in Caddy Shack, dances to Kenny Loggins. Now that would be funny.

About L. A. Lewandowski

Lois Lewandowski graduated from Rutgers University with a degree in Political Science and French Literature. A passion for life lived well is reflected in her first novel, “Born to Die-The Montauk Murders”, a glimpse into the world of the beau monde. Her second novel, “My Gentleman Vampire: The Undead Have Style”, introduces a new breed of fabulous, tango dancing undead. Lois enjoys the sun in beautiful Tampa, Florida. Learn more at her lifestyle blog, and her Amazon author page.

19 THOUGHTS ON “THE COCKROACH GAMES”




lynnecantwell7 on April 11, 2013 at 5:56 pm said:

Great post, Lois. You Floridians don’t mess around when it comes to cockroaches. I hate those things! One of my greatest joys, when I lived in Colorado, was discovering that it was too arid for them there.

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Lois Lewandowskion April 12, 2013 at 7:32 am said:

No, we don’t mess around. Windex or Glass Plus freezes them in their tracks and then you can whack them. They are unbelievably fast. And, they can fly.

Thanks for your comments. 

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Yvonne Hertzberger on April 11, 2013 at 6:49 pm said:

Hilarious. I could picture it all so clearly.

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Lois Lewandowskion April 12, 2013 at 7:46 am said:

Thanks, Yvonne.

There are lots of critters in Florida and this one was certainly full of spunk.

How about a fabulous cockroach character in your WIP? 

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DV Berkom on April 11, 2013 at 10:01 pm said:

“I needed to think like a cockroach, nay, I must become a cockroach.”

ROTFL Lois… I think I met his cousin in Mexico this past February Hilarious post–thanks for the laugh.

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Lois Lewandowskion April 12, 2013 at 7:49 am said:

DV,

This insect was one crafty bug.

I could never have slept knowing he had breached the outer walls and could run freely. He had to die.

I’m glad you enjoyed the post.

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alkaplan on April 12, 2013 at 5:26 am said:

Nice post. My first introduction to cockroaches was as a young child at my great-grandmother’s appartment. She had just been moved to a nursing home and we went to help pack her stuff. The apartment was infested, the doorframe was coated with the devils.

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Lois Lewandowskion April 12, 2013 at 7:54 am said:

The word “infested” makes my skin crawl. It is a continuing battle in Florida to contain the critters. But there is so much beauty as well.

When I was doing research for this post I was on a site that had non-pesticide solutions to pest control. One of the things they suggested is to buy a gecko. They said, “You won’t see him while he takes care of your roach problem. When he has it under control then he’ll be visible.” Just what I need, gecko poop in the house. But desperate times can call for desperate measures. Thankfully, I haven’t found any lately.

Thanks for your comments.

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JK Mikals on April 12, 2013 at 8:49 am said:

To answer your request, I don’t know of a book, but here is one of my favorite jokes: There was a man whose custom was to stop at the local convenience store after work and buy three six-packs, which he then proceeded to drink in front of the TV before bed. One night, just as he slugged back the last can, he heard a knock at the door. Imagine his surprise when he opened it to a 6 foot cockroach. The roach grabbed his shirtfront and beat the pulp out of him before throwing him to the ground and stalking off.

The man dragged himself off to bed muttering, “I’ve got to cut down on the beer.”

The next night he only bought two six-packs, but just as he was finishing the last can, there was a knock at the door. It was the same 6 foot roach, and once again it beat him to a pulp. “I’ve really got to cut back,” the man told himself as he dragged his sore body off to bed.

The following night, he only bought one six-pack, but exactly the same thing happened anyway.

Feeling that he needed help, he went to the doctor the next day and told his sad tale. “Hmm,” said the doctor, stroking his goatee, “yes. Well, I have heard that there is an extremely nasty bug going around.”

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Lois Lewandowskion April 12, 2013 at 11:44 am said:

JK, I love that joke, thank you!

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KristaTibbs on April 12, 2013 at 8:51 am said:

I’m so glad you went on to kill the cockroach in your post, because otherwise I would have imagined it hiding in my bathroom and had to stop everything to bleach the life out of the place.

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Lois Lewandowskion April 12, 2013 at 11:56 am said:

I got him, Krista. No worries. 

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Jenni Gate on April 12, 2013 at 10:10 am said:

I love this post! I grew up in the Third World, so cockroaches were part of everyday life. My sisters and I used to joke about how they would come running up the overflow drain in the bathtub and jump in with us so they could show off their backstroke and breaststroke to our screams and squeals. I kept a can of Raid by the bath, but it didn’t do much. I’m sure they built an immunity to the poison. And although I LOVE geckos, and we always had a house full of them, they really didn’t do much to deter the cockroaches.

Love the nasty bug joke by JK Mikals above too. 

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Lois Lewandowskion April 12, 2013 at 11:51 am said:

In the tub? My skin is crawling.

My neighbor is a pulmonologist and he says Raid is really bad for humans to breathe. I think the ammonia in Windex burns them so they have to slow down. Then, it’s curtains for them. 

Thanks for your comments.

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JK Mikals on April 12, 2013 at 10:34 am said:

If liked the bug joke and/or you want more True Cockroach stories, I have one from Costa Rica and two (“War of the Roaches II” and “…III” ) from Los Angeles on my blog.http://www.jkmikals.blogspot.com/2012/01/war-of-roaches.html

“War of the Roaches III” includes the ultimate solution. Works for mice and ants, too. 

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Jenni Gateon April 12, 2013 at 10:43 am said:

Ha! I will check it out!

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Lois Lewandowskion April 12, 2013 at 11:44 am said:

I’ll check it out, too. 

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Carolyn Steele on April 12, 2013 at 11:03 am said:

Love it. I temp sometimes for a pest control company over the summer, mainly dealing with wasps’ nests that have invaded attics and wall cavities. You have to ‘think like a wasp’ to get them before they know you’re there.  Rehoming bee swarms too, got to think like the bees. So, becoming the cockroach is a lovely image. Didn’t know about the Windex though, will buy in extra, just in case.

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Lois Lewandowskion April 12, 2013 at 11:55 am said:

You are a woman of many talents, Carolyn!

I don’t know which insect I would rather deal with, but I am glad you are in tune with wasp thinking and can outsmart them.

Thanks for your comment. 

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Mung Bean Pancakes

Mung bean pancake.

My friend made mung bean pancakes for our Korean Barbeque C & C dinner. The picture doesn’t do them justice; they were moist and very tasty! She also made kimchi, a staple in the Korean diet. A friend of mine who was born in Korea said it was better than hers! Her notations are in blue.

14oz nok doo (mung beans)  These should be dried mung beans, split and hulled or peeled.  Available in asian food stores.  I used whole dried mung beans with their green skin still on them.
1 medium onion, sliced thin
1 carrot, shredded or julienned
4 scallions, sliced in diagonal
1/4 lb beef, sliced very thin   I might try ground pork next time, although the beef was good, too.
1.2 cup bean sprouts – blanched, drained and chopped coarsely
1/2 cup kimchi - although I made my own homemade kimchi as a learning experience, I would definitely used store-bought next time!! It was a lot of work.
2 Tbsp salt
Soak mung beans in water for 3 hours.  Drain and rinse.  Puree in food processor with some water til a spreadable paste.  (I found that the pancakes need something to bind them.  I’ve seen recipes with 2 eggs and a little flour added, and others with 6 Tbsp of glutinous/sweet rice soaked and ground with the beans.  These would be good ideas as I had trouble with the pancakes falling apart.)



In a large bowl, mix the vegetables, meat, bean paste and salt.  In a non-stick pan with some vegetable oil, spread a 3-4 inch circle of past and cook until brown, turning once.  These took a LONG time to cook.  I ended up using my 2-sided frittata pan from Williams-Sonoma to cook an 8-inch diameter pancake and flip it.  These took about 12 minutes a side, or 24 minutes each.  You should get about 6 8-inch pancakes from the above recipe.



I made up a serving/dipping sauce mixed from these ingredients based on taste:  soy sauce, rice vinegar, mirin, sesame oil, lime juice, red pepper flakes.



The kimchi recipe is here:  http://www.epicurious.com/recipes/food/views/Traditional-Napa-Cabbage-Kimchi-233839
I used Korean chile paste, not powder, but, otherwise, I followed this recipe closely.

Slow Cooker Beef Brisket

I picked up my son from college today and I wanted to have a nice dinner ready to serve when we got home. This recipe was extremely easy and delicious. It is from the Taste of Home site, which has many wonderful recipes.

 Slow Cooker Beef Brisket Recipe






Prep: 20 min. Cook: 6 hours
Yield: 6-8 Servings

Ingredients

1 fresh beef brisket (3 to 4 pounds)
1/2 pound sliced fresh mushrooms
2 bay leaves
2 cups crushed tomatoes
1 cup chopped onion
1/2 cup packed brown sugar
1/2 cup balsamic vinegar
1/2 cup ketchup
1/4 cup cornstarch
1/4 cup cold water

Directions

Cut brisket in half; place in a 5-qt. slow cooker. Add mushrooms and bay leaves. Combine the tomatoes, onion, brown sugar, vinegar and ketchup; pour over beef. Cover and cook on low for 6-7 hours or until meat is tender.
Remove beef and keep warm. Discard bay leaves. In a large saucepan, combine cornstarch and water until smooth. Gradually stir in cooking liquid. Bring to a boil; cook and stir for 2 minutes or until thickened. Slice meat across the grain; serve with gravy. Yield: 6-8 servings.

Editor’s Note: This is a fresh beef brisket, not corned beef.

The Gumbo Shop’s Oyster and Artichoke Soup

Before Hurricane Katrina my husband and I visited New Orleans and fell in love with this mysterious foodie town. On one of our trips we stayed at the Soniat House and I rose early to walk the surrounding blocks. There were few tourists around, and I watched as the local citizens went about their day. The artists were setting up their sidewalk offerings as I entered the hush of a Roman Catholic church. After many volumes of P.D. James I always visit local churches when traveling. I lit a candle, said a prayer, and continued my exploration.

A sign overhead caught my eye and I peered down a narrow alley to a sunlit courtyard where I could see tables and  few people waiting in line. Feeling adventurous, I followed my instincts and was seated for lunch at 11:00 am. Forty-five minutes later the room was packed. My lunch, crawfish etouffée was stellar and I bought two of their cookbooks before leaving.

I was feeling sassy the other day and I decided to make this recipe. It was lusciously smooth and decadent, just what you would expect of a New Orleans recipe. I have noted my adjustments at the end. Next up is the Duck and Oyster Soup. My husband can’t wait.

Serves 6


4 large or 6 medium artichoke
-or-
1 c drained and well rinsed canned artichoke hearts
1/2 c butter
1 c finely chopped onion
1/2 c finely chopped celery
1/2 c finely chopped green bell pepper
1 tbsp minced garlic
1/4 tsp nutmeg
1/2 tsp sage
1 tsp thyme
1 tsp black pepper
1 tsp white pepper
1/4 tsp cayenne pepper
1 tsp salt
1/3 c flour
2 c chicken stock
1 c heavy cream
1 c whole milk
1 pint oysters

 

Recipe

Boil the artichokes for about 30-40 minutes until leaves pull off easily. Scrape the leaves and clean and chop the bottoms. If you are using canned hearts, drain, rinse them well, and coarsely chop. Set aside.


In a large heavy bottomed dutch oven, melt the butter and add the celery, onion, and bell pepper. Saute over a medium fire until the vegetables are soft but not browned. Stir in the garlic, nutmeg, sage, thyme, black, white, and cayenne peppers and salt. Cook 1 minute. Add the flour, mixing well to avoid getting lumps. Cook and stir 1 minute. Blend in the chicken stock, add the artichoke scrapings and bottoms (or hearts), and bring to a gentle boil. Cover and simmer for about 20 minutes. Add the cream and milk and return to a simmer, stirring occasionally. Pour in the oysters and a little of the oyster liquor and cook just until their edges are curled. Adjust the seasoning and serve.

My Notes: I used four large artichokes and they took longer than 45 minutes, but that may have been because the water was not a rolling boil when I initially put them in. The scraping of the artichokes is the most time consuming part of the recipe. From now on I will do this ahead of time, before my company arrives. Then, I will put the soup together while they are enjoying a cocktail with me in the kitchen, and serve it fresh without stressing over the artichokes. I used homemade shrimp stock, and I probably used 2 1/2 to 3 cups to make the roux a nice consistency. Enjoy!

Authors Eat…

Author Martin Crosbie embraces a beautiful day at the beach.

This month the Culture and Cuisine Club features popular Indie author Martin Crosbie. Martin is the author of two wonderful books, “My Name is Hardly” and “My Temporary Life”, both bestsellers on Amazon. He was named as one of Amazon’s success stories of 2012.

Martin is also a much sought after speaker on radio programs and at writer’s conferences. As a self-published author, he is a shining example of what a great product and hard work can achieve. When not writing novels he maintains his own eloquent blog, and juggles writing for newspapers, on-line magazines and the industry leading writer’s blog, Indies Unlimited. Martin has shared a yummy recipe that you will want to try the next time you barbeque!

Martin’s Plagiarized BBQ Salmon Recipe

I stole this recipe but it’s okay, no copyrights were infringed in the cooking of this salmon.

The freckle-faced girl and I were doing our annual Mexico deal and we ventured away from the all-inclusive one afternoon. We’d eaten before we left but I guess the sea-air as we were walking along the beach got to us, and the smell, the smell was driving us crazy. We tracked the aroma to a small pokey-looking bar. There were a couple of gentleman barbecuing salmon on an open grill right on the beach, outside the bar. We couldn’t resist, and I’m glad we didn’t. We live on the west coast, so we’re not unfamiliar with barbecued fish but this was different from anything we’d ever tasted. As I was going up for my second helping I managed to extract the secret from one of the cooks. You spread mayonnaise or Miracle Whip on the salmon and barbecue it. Yep, it’s as simple as that. Here’s the very simple recipe we’ve come up with over the years:

 

Ingredients:

2 salmon filets-any size
1/2 cup mayonnaise (or dilled mayonnaise)

Preparation:

1. Lightly spread mayo on both sides of the filets.

2. Heat the grill to medium-high heat.

3. Place the filets, flesh-side down, and grill for up to 3-5 minutes (depending on thickness).

4. Rotate each filet 1/2 turn (flesh-side down) and cook another 3-5 minutes (again, this depends on the thickness of the fish).

5. Turn filets over (skin-side down) and cook another 5 minutes

6. Serve with a dollop of mayonnaise and a sprig of dill.

 

My mouth is watering while I’m typing this. I know it sounds really simple but the mayo is oil-based, so it’s perfect for grilling fish, and this works almost as well on a frying pan as a barbecue.

The following links will help you to find Martin’s books and read some of his other publications. Enjoy!

His Amazon author page: http://www.amazon.com/Martin-Crosbie/e/B006OV3NGC

An excellent post he wrote for Indies Unlimited: http://www.indiesunlimited.com/2013/04/02/the-blog-nobody-wanted-to-publish-except-indies-unlimited/

And his author blog: http://martincrosbie.com/blog/ 

Getting it Right: The Garden State

This post appeared previously at Indies Unlimited.

Getting It Right: The Garden State
Posted on March 14, 2013 by L. A. Lewandowski

“Welcome to Newark, a city in renaissance.” – A Continental Flight Attendant, 2002.

I never realized that there was anything wrong with being from New Jersey until I began to travel for business. It became quickly apparent to me that N.J. had a bad rep. How had I missed this? Had my highly-tuned female powers of observation failed me? Had I hidden in my subconscious mind the stigma associated with a N.J. birthplace? I decided to call my close friend, Bruce Springsteen, to see what he thought.

Of course, Bruce always takes my calls. We chatted for a bit about our projects, and compared what we were cooking for dinner. He wanted my recipe for crock-pot short ribs. I shared it, even though he never gives me a recipe in return. Finally, I posed my question, “Bruuuuce, what is wrong with being from our homeland?”

“Well, Wendy, when dudes fly into Newark airport they see oil refineries and rusty containers. The airport is filled with hood rats, and then you get on the Turnpike … a river of asphalt that flows from the gritty urban landscape to the twisted steel of Seaside. Hey, I like that. I feel a poem coming on — got to go, Sandy. Thanks for the recipe.” Ugh. Dissed again.

After extensive research, (calling relatives and friends in addition to my own experiences), here are just a few things that makes New Jersey a great place to live.

N.J. has excellent food. Thin crust pizza rules. Italian, Chinese, Deli, Polish, French, Portugese, bagels … a cornucopia of food that you can drive into Manhattan for and pay ten times the price. Just don’t ask anyone to make you grits because they don’t understand what they are.
The ability to revel in being close to the hustle and bustle of Manhattan without actually being in Manhattan.
Having an Uncle Tony. Everyone has an Uncle Tony. My Uncle Tony, my godfather as it so happens, was an excellent bowler.
Jersey girls go “down the shore”. We make this drive from Memorial to Labor Day. We do not go “to the beach.” We use the picturesque Garden State Parkway as opposed to the New Jersey Turnpike. And yes, we all have an exit. Mine was 156.
The proud home of Rutgers, The State University, and a decent school called Princeton. These two schools played the first intercollegiate football game in 1869. Rutgers won. Go Scarlet Knights!
We have fertile farmland that produces the best white corn I’ve ever eaten, and wonderful Beefsteak tomatoes.
There are lots of professional sports teams to choose from, all of them better than Philadelphia and Boston teams.
There is cultural diversity, and cultural events in wondrous excess. Museums, concerts, dance, movie marathons and theater. There is so much going on that it can overwhelm you. I will admit that a lot of the events, especially the museums, are in Manhattan, but many are in New Jersey at the former Garden State Arts Center. It has a new name now. Whatever.
Christie is an outspoken governor who is going to tell you what he thinks whether or not you want to hear it.
Conrad’s ice cream parlor in downtown Westwood is a local landmark. The entire restaurant is still the way it was when my mom would take us there for “minute meals” and ice cream. Due to a tight family budget this was a rare occurrence. Conrad’s makes everything themselves, including scrumptious chocolate. They were making incredible Easter bunnies long before cable TV made that art a contest. I had my first egg cream at Conrad’s. An egg cream doesn’t have egg or cream in it.
If you’re a Jersey girl you can cuss with class and creativity. You can take someone down in such a way that they will never find their legs. Then, to make yourself feel better, you go shopping at the Garden State Plaza. Hello Nordstrom!
Family, or in Soprano speak, La Famiglia. I remember many spirited discussions among my relatives, but I suppose that has more to do with being of Italian heritage. Family trips to my grandmother’s house, getting in trouble with my cousins, eating pignolli and anisette cookies, these are family memories I cherish. Yes, I did revert back to food. So many of my memories surround food and shared meals.
Frank Sinatra is from Hoboken, N.J. Old Blue Eyes like Bruce Springsteen, may be imitated but never replaced. The Chairman of the Board and The Boss say so.
I should mention the rock band Bon Jovi here. Jon still looks and sounds amazing.
We say “cawfee” and “dawg.” Do not confuse a few eccentric aspects of our accent with those citizens who are from Queens, Brooklyn or Long Island. The N.J. accent softens and becomes less obvious the further south you were raised in the state.
We are honest and will tell you what we think to your face. We won’t eviscerate you and gossip about you behind your back and then say, “… God love her”. We know that saying that doesn’t make a nasty comment okay. We will tell you plainly what we think. Take it or leave it.

So why, you might ask, do I live in Florida? We relocated here due to a job opportunity and fell in love with the weather and the wildlife. The Tampa Bay area is a great place to live. One thing I do not miss is a frigid New Jersey winter. We visit as frequently as we can to enjoy family and absorb the unique vibe that is the Garden State. I am still, in my heart and soul, a Jersey girl.

Down the shore everything’s alright,

You’re with your baby on a saturday night,

Don’t you know that all my dreams come true,

When i’m walkin’ down the street with you…

- Jersey Girl, song and lyrics by Tom Waits

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This entry was posted in Staff Articles and tagged author blogs, author L.A. Lewandowski, Bruce Springsteen, getting it right, Indies Unlimited, Jersey girl, The Garden State by L. A. Lewandowski. Bookmark the permalink.



About L. A. Lewandowski

Lois Lewandowski graduated from Rutgers University with a degree in Political Science and French Literature. A passion for life lived well is reflected in her first novel, “Born to Die-The Montauk Murders”, a glimpse into the world of the beau monde. Her second novel, “My Gentleman Vampire: The Undead Have Style”, introduces a new breed of fabulous, tango dancing undead. Lois enjoys the sun in beautiful Tampa, Florida. Learn more at her lifestyle blog, and her Amazon author page.

View all posts by L. A. Lewandowski →





29 THOUGHTS ON “GETTING IT RIGHT: THE GARDEN STATE”




BigAl on March 14, 2013 at 2:16 pm said:

Lois, you mentioned The Boss twice, but he isn’t on your list. Surely that makes it seriously incomplete. 

To this list I’d add filmmaker Kevin Smith whose first film “Clerks” was, IIRC, filmed in his home town of Red Bank (an indie film to boot). Also one of my personal favorite songwriters (behind the Boss, obviously) a guy named Greg Trooper (who probably no one who reads this has heard of).

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Lois Lewandowskion March 14, 2013 at 7:43 pm said:

Hey Big Al,

Bruuuuuuce is a list all by himself. 

I have cousins who live in Red Bank. I have not heard of Kevin Smith or Greg Trooper, but will check them out.

Thanks for stopping by.

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dhbarbara on March 14, 2013 at 2:21 pm said:

LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOVE this post! Born and raised in Bergen County!

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Lois Lewandowskion March 14, 2013 at 7:47 pm said:

Thanks, I’m a Bergen County girl myself. I grew up just north of Paramus, the shopping capital of the world. The Garden State Plaza is like a city!

Nice to meet another Jersey girl.

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Gloria Repp on March 14, 2013 at 3:16 pm said:

And don’t forget the New Jersey Pinelands–aka The Pine Barrens — almost a million federally-protected acres in the middle of the state. I drive the 800 miles north from SC each year to hike the pine forests with their sugar-sand roads, kayak the gleaming dark rivers, and poke around in the tumbled ruins.

Of course I had to use the incomparable Pine Barrens as the setting for a few books. 

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Lois Lewandowskion March 14, 2013 at 7:58 pm said:

Gloria, you are right. The Pine Barrens are an incredible ecosystem. Did you kill people and bury the bodies in the Pine Barrens? How did you use the PB in your books?

I also didn’t mention diners. Florida has chain restaurants. Floridians don’t understand the concept of a restaurant that stays open 24/7 where one person can get breakfast, one can get spaghetti, and the third can get lemon meringue. My husband always orders a pork-roll egg and cheese sandwich. So good!

Thanks for your comment.

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martinthewriter on March 14, 2013 at 3:20 pm said:

I was a huge Bruce fan when I was a kid and had a somewhat romantic notion of New Jersey until… I had a connecting flight at Newark airport many years ago. I think the airport was under construction and it was just a mess. I should have driven to the shore and checked to see if Rosalita could come out tonight.

The latest greatest Jersey band is Gaslight Anthem by the way. Shades of Bruce in their music. Great post, Lois, made me remember.

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Lois Lewandowskion March 14, 2013 at 8:07 pm said:

Newark airport is a real adventure. I traveled through the airport a couple of times when they were doing the construction you are fondly remembering. It was a disaster.

Speaking of Rosalita, the last time I saw Bruce he performed the song, which he doesn’t do very often. It was the first show after Danny Federici died. Clarence was still alive, but not well. He sat on a red and gold throne when he wasn’t playing. The concert was in Tampa, and when we heard him getting ready to play Rosalita the place exploded. An amazing show.

I think I’ve heard Gaslight Anthem, will check it out.

Thanks for your comments.

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DV Berkom on March 14, 2013 at 5:42 pm said:

Awesome post, Lois 

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Lois Lewandowskion March 14, 2013 at 8:07 pm said:

Thank you!

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lynnecantwell7 on March 14, 2013 at 7:05 pm said:

Sorry, Lois, but I have nothing but bad memories of New Jersey:

1. Waiting for a connecting flight in the old People Express terminal at the Newark airport — no seats, no carpet, no plane.

2. Trying to find the Turnpike while driving back to Virginia from the Jersey shore in the dark. Why on *earth* is there no direct connection between the Turnpike and the Garden State Parkway? I got soooo lost…

I’ll shut up now. But feel free to complain about *my* home state of Indiana in return. I’ll probably join you. 

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Laurie Borison March 14, 2013 at 8:04 pm said:

Oh, Lynne, I’m having People Express flashbacks now…

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Lois Lewandowskion March 14, 2013 at 8:22 pm said:

Oh Lynne, did People Express give out the bagels?

I don’t think I ever flew that airline.  Sorry for your and Laurie’s flashbacks.

The Turnpike is a crazy road full of people who think you know where they are going. I got used to checking out the tires to see if they turned right a bit to be ready to be cut off, especially when close to the Staten Island exits.

I’m sure the state is easier to negotiate now that the GPS systems can tell you which highways you can use to connect from the Parkway to the Turnpike. I will tell you that I believe it wasn’t planned that way because they are huge money making operations with separate kingdoms. When I worked for ROLM we had both of their phone systems, and they were my accounts. They employ lots of people and they are extremely political and protective of their turf. So, no connector road for you!

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lynnecantwell7on March 15, 2013 at 5:30 am said:

People Express was the Megabus of airlines, except the service wasn’t nearly as good as Megabus. Be very glad you missed ‘em, Lois.  And sorry for the flashbacks, Laurie….

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islandkayakeron March 15, 2013 at 12:46 pm said:

I hate Newark airport so I can’t blame anyone who dislikes NJ because of it. There is a direct connection between the parkway and the turnpike, it’s just nowhere near the shore… figures, right?

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Lois Lewandowskion March 15, 2013 at 1:34 pm said:

I have never heard anyone say they love Newark airport. I just love to pretend to be really happy when I’m going through security. And super polite.

“Good morning.” (Big smile as I hand over my drivers license to burley security guard.) As often as not they smile back and I am sent to the shortest line. I guess people don’t smile at them and say “good morning.” It’s not their fault that travel has become so stressful. 

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Laurie Boris on March 14, 2013 at 8:07 pm said:

Lois, this is FABULOUS! Okay, I make fun of Jersey a bit, mainly because my younger brother moved there, but that’s my duty as a sister. 

Don’t forget the fantastic Jersey blueberries. And the old brick smoke stacks in Garfield.

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Lois Lewandowskion March 14, 2013 at 8:28 pm said:

We had wild black berry bushes in the woods next to our home. One day I saw all the birds going crazy dive bombing something and fighting with each other. I checked it out and there were several shrubs loaded with huge berries. I ran inside, got a container, and picked them for my father-in-law. He was so thrilled. There were plenty left for the birds.

There were wild raspberry bushes down the road and I traded one year with a neighbor who picked them.

That’s the thing about New Jersey. It has a lot of urban areas and it also has rural. My neighbor had cows. 

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Nancy Fischer on March 15, 2013 at 5:33 am said:

I love being a Jersey girl in Texas. It explains a lot.

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Lois Lewandowskion March 15, 2013 at 1:37 pm said:

A Jersey girl in Texas! There’s no stopping us.

Thanks for saying hello.

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Gary Cunnane on March 15, 2013 at 5:35 am said:

I am Jersey born and raised and so were all of my grandparents. We (my wife and I) lived in Tampa Bay for 6 years. You will get so tired of how clueless and standoffish people are down there and you will come running home. If not you are doomed to a lifetime bad pizza, no crashing surf, 9 months of oppressive unyielding heat and humidity and bugs the size of skateboards. Have those tiny ants found there way into your peanut butter jar yet? Go Rays? Uh No. At least you can watch the Yankees in training for free.

We all miss you even though we don’t know you. Come back to where you belong.

Loved your article!! Read mine on New Jersey, not Manhattan, clam chowder on my website

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Lois Lewandowskion March 15, 2013 at 1:51 pm said:

Lol Gary,

Ants in the peanut butter? How about a black racer snake in my laundry room–all three feet of him! Florida has made me a tough cookie when it comes to lizards, bugs, etc. He tried to get away, into the rest of the house, and I sprayed him in the face with Glass Plus. My husband swept him outside. We didn’t kill him.

I make my own pizza, and it’s darn good.

The heat is oppressive, and I hope one day to escape in July and August, hopefully back to New Jersey.

I have to disagree about the people in the Tampa Bay area. I have met many lovely people. That may be because I started to play tennis late in life and now play competitively. I can play all year round, outside. I don’t miss the winter or the grey skies. I love the weather in Florida.

I also root for the Rays and the Bucs, just not when they play the Yankees or the Giants. 

And I would love to have your recipe. Cuisine is my thing.

Nice to meet you!

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Nancy Fischer on March 15, 2013 at 5:38 am said:

Lois, don’t forget the diversity of landscape, from densely urban to sparsely rural, mountains, lakes, the shore-both boardwalk and wild dunes, rolling hills of horse farms, rivers, and 4 seasons….and thanks, Laurie for the post.

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Lois Lewandowskion March 15, 2013 at 1:54 pm said:

Nancy,

I can’t agree more! That was what shocked me the most when I began to travel for business. Everyone thought I lived next to the smoke stacks of the oil refineries. 

Thanks for your comments.

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K. Rowe on March 15, 2013 at 5:48 am said:

Spent 10 years station at McGuire/Dix/Lakehurst joint base. South Jersey is a whole ‘nother world. It’s green, there are trees and forests, there are probably more deer than humans (hunters there can’t shoot worth a darn!), and the state animal is the horse. I agree with North Jersey- the sky is GREEN, petro-chemical plants abound and everything is old and rusty. Jersey is a definite contrast in a state. I was happy to live in the south!

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Gary Cunnaneon March 15, 2013 at 6:03 am said:

I grew up in Bergen County and we could go fishing, camping and swimming (illegally) within walking distance of my house. It is Northern New Jersey and is still beautiful to this day. A lot more congested and very expensive though , being right outside NYC

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Lois Lewandowskion March 15, 2013 at 2:08 pm said:

The part of Bergen County that I grew up in had no industry at all. I remember parks, bike riding, picking apples; very different from what most people think.

I believe the industrial counties in northern New Jersey are Essex and Passaic. Someone in the U.S. needs to do a bit of the dirty work, and New Jersey has been a manufacturing state for decades. Hidden in these hard-working manufacturing towns are fantastic little restaurants offering superb food at fair prices. You have to have the inside track. 

Kathy, where did you see a green sky? That’s a scary thought.

Gary, The town I grew up in had a one pump gas-station and a strip mall with a Foodtown and a movie theater. There is a house where George Washington slept during the Revolutionary War. He slept a lot of places in Bergen County. 

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islandkayaker on March 15, 2013 at 12:59 pm said:

I am also a NJ native who moved to the Tampa Bay area (Anna Maria Island)! I grew up at the shore (Toms River / Seaside / Spring Lake Heights, just to name a few areas I lived in my 33 years) and went to Richard Stockton College in south Jersey, so my Jersey experience is way different. I don’t have the accent unless I try to do it on purpose. We did go to the ‘beach’ and would joke about the “BENNYs” ‘going down the shore’. It was a great place to grow up and I lived for the summers. My love for warm weather and sunshine is what brought us down here, but I’m still a Jersey Shore girl at heart. I do miss the pizza and bread though!

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Lois Lewandowski on March 15, 2013 at 2:15 pm said:

Anna Maria Island is lovely.

My in-laws lived in Toms River. They started calling people “Bennys”, too. They lived on the water, on a man made lagoon. It was their dream.

You were already “down the shore” so you didn’t have to go there. 

I agree with you that the warm weather and sunshine is a big plus in Florida. Having the opportunity to live on Anna Maria Island would convince most people to move from wherever they live.

Nice to meet you!