Konn Lavery's Blog: Posts from konnlavery.com, page 25

Option Three

Questioning mortality can be a slippery slope. Thoughts can betray you. Your mind can become quicksand, pulling you into dark depths of the consciousness that you cannot escape from. How far into the self is one willing to satisfy curiosity?

Option Three is April’s short story that brings you into a fictional struggle of the self, our own mortality, and issues of the bigger picture.

Option Three

Being alive is not a concrete concept. Sure, you can feel with your senses and experience joy or sadness, and that might be considered alive, but that’s not what I’m talking about. Maybe I am coming from a philosophical standpoint. What does it mean to be alive? What are we? I do not know. Some days I find myself questioning my mortality. Like, my mind lives inside of my brain – according to science – and that is where my thoughts are. The brain is where I am. With that logic, my mind is just a series of electrical neurons buzzing around some organic tissue. Take the mind away, and the body is not me – according to science. Or if the brain stops shooting neurons, I’m dead – according to science.

It’s a bit crazy to go on these tangents of the self. I go mad, going through these answerless questions daily. There isn’t much else to do when you live in a butt-hole of a town with less than a thousand people. Your options for activity are limited. The other kids smoke up, drink, fight, and vandalize. I do too. They’re my friends, some of them, so I join along and get high or drink to excess. Then the grizzled after-work-drunk men yell at us from their porch, seeing us walking inebriated. They threaten that they’ll call the cops, but they don’t. We don’t have any weed or drinks on us when we’re walking down the road. We’re not stupid.

Don’t get me wrong; I like getting wasted like anyone else and then getting yelled at by the townsfolk to take off the spiked collar and makeup and focus on school. It’s a real good “fuck you” attitude to the prudes while we stay up until the sun rises. It’s fun, and the only activity you can do here. Still, at some point in the day, you are done all of that. You can only drink and do drugs so much at any given time. Even for only a few minutes, you’ll find yourself at your most vulnerable. You might be waking up in the morning or walking to school, that is the most frightening experience of all.

Thoughts run through my mind. I wonder if I will ever get out of this small town. No one likes to talk to me. I mean, talk to me. The adults are either rambling about the government being a bunch of lib-tards taking oil money away or telling me to stop dying my hair and help my folks. My friends want to get drunk, break shit, and poke fun at the nerds. No one wants to talk. When I say talk, I mean getting into the nitty-gritty of ourselves. Introspective if you will.

My gramps had a lot of books he left us before he blew his brains out. I read through them, not understanding everything. He had a wide range of books, like some on religions, philosophy, social sciences – all the good stuff. My parents do not read them. They watch the tube, drink, smoke, and then fight over the dishes or over that waitress my dad banged over a decade ago. They don’t have time to learn or let alone pay attention to their kid. The books just stay in gramps’s old room, left untouched since the day he died. They’ve become my teacher.

Maybe these books are what separates me from everyone else. I’ve asked my teachers if they’ve heard about them. Some have, others haven’t. In short, they tell me to focus on my grades that are slipping. Whatever. If an academic facility is not the place to talk about ideas, where is it then? I don’t know. Thus, I find myself wandering inside of my mind, puffing on a cigarette alone, watching the sun go down from the rooftop of that old abandoned butcher shop. I do enjoy the sun. The warmth and light really brings a sense of stillness. It doesn’t judge my outfit or my thoughts. The giant fireball only watches before it vanishes behind the horizon. Then, I am left in the beautiful blackness of the night where the world is at peace.

I get stuck on the question of who we are. If science is right, then we are just a series of neuron links accumulated together to create consciousness. Take a single neuron out of the equation and examine it, and that is not you. With that reasoning, how many neurons does it take to make up you?

I know these are questions with no answers. The more I read, the more I wonder. Religion offers different solutions, also with no conclusion other than we are the abstract concept known as a soul. Dig into any of those books and you’ll find they can’t answer some of the real difficult questions other than saying that’s the way it is. I have discovered one thing, though. The more questions you ask, the more it alienates you. My friends have started to talk to me less. Whatever. They were boring to me anyways. We still chat at school and stuff, but I don’t have much else to say beyond that. My mind is too troubled by my mortality. My interests have made me an outcast amongst the rejects. No number of spikes or layers of black nail polish will have them see me in any other light – or darkness if you will.

Now that I am not off getting high or drunk every moment I can, it has given me more time with the self. I am wondering what defines me. Where do I go when I die? The body and the brain stay here. The neurons die. Then is that it? Does the consciousness fizzle out? If so, then why does any of this matter if we eventually end up in the nothingness? The joy in life is so short-lived only to be met by misery, as we wait for another wave of happiness, then the cycle repeats itself. I wonder if experiencing life with others makes living have value. Then it is your memory that lives on through others is what matters. I chuck the idea aside. That has no place for me, not in this small town.

I wonder if I will ever get out of here either. I’ll graduate high school in a year, and I don’t have a lot of money to skip town and head for the big city. It’s not like I have any aspirations. I just read and get myself tied up in a theoretical knot inside my head. Skipping town to be homeless in a big city doesn’t sound appealing either: escape the suffering here for new pain. It’s all pointless. Whatever.

Did I mention my gramps blew his head off? Yeah, he was a bit of a gun freak. My folks cleaned out all his guns from the house after that. They didn’t check his bookshelves – because they don’t read – and I found an old revolver tucked inside a dummy-book. Man, did that ever shock me. There is so much power in something so small. One bullet can end all of the thoughts inside of someone’s head. Sight, smell, touch, hearing, and taste all go away. The emotional sensations cease to be with one pull of the pistol’s trigger.

Back to the mortality and life-after-death stuff, if this is all we have, and our consciousness dies inside of our mind, then we return to some state of neutrality when we die. We can’t experience loss, sadness, or misery because our neurons are toast. It’s kind of the closest thing to isness, or monks try to do. Death is the answer. The eternal peace.

We all end up there at some point. It’s up to you how long you want to gamble in this game called life. Roll another dice each morning, hoping something will get better. The years go by, you keep trucking along, and eventually, you turn into my parents – drunk and fighting. As you get older, you could end up like gramps and finally call it quits anyways and take your own life.

Now I sit here on that same old abandoned butcher shop rooftop, puffing on a smoke, and watching the sunset. I think about my quality of life. I have a choice to make. I can be isolated from everyone with my intellect. I could swoop back down to drinking, smoking, and vandalizing with a real punk-rock attitude. The third option is I could end it. The revolver in my sweaty hand is loaded. I suppose it does not matter what choice I make. At some point, I will eat the dirt. It’s really up to me if I want to try and gamble with living on or just take the shortcut. No one will miss me, anyways. Over half the time I am alone. I don’t talk to anyone anymore. I have no one to touch. Death sure would make for some talk of the town. Option three is one I’ve been considering heavily today. That’s why I brought the revolver to my mouth as I stare out into the sun, which is looking back at me, not judging, only watching. The neutrality of the fireball was the one thing I would miss, and now I second guess my gramps and myself. Maybe the sunset each day is all I need. Hey, there’s something worth living for or whatever. It’s probably a good idea to take the gun out of my mouth then. Maybe I’ll give life a go for one more day, enjoy this setting sun, and embrace the peace of the night.

The post Option Three appeared first on Konn Lavery.

Fire, Pain, & Ruin Pre-order Special Offer

The second installment of the Rutherford Manor series is now available for preorder! Visit www.rutherford-manor.com/book-preorder to learn more. Join the Savidges and Fleshers as their bloodlines further intertwine with violence, black magic, lust, and the supernatural.

Pre-order up a hardcopy of Fire, Pain, & Ruin for your supernatural thriller library and receive:

A signed copy of the novelTwo Limited Edition Trading Cards (Random)One Limited Edition Muunat Button Pin

All pre-order hard copies will be signed by Konn Lavery, author of the book, and Preston Ewasiuk, the creator of Rutherford Manor.

Pre-order Fire, Pain, & Ruin

The post Fire, Pain, & Ruin Pre-order Special Offer appeared first on Konn Lavery.

Author Kathrin Hutson Returns with Sleepwater Static, the Novel in the Blue Helix Sci-Fi series

Last July we had international bestselling author Kathrin Hutson join us to discuss her LGBTQ Dystopian sci-fi series, Blue Helix with book 1, Sleepwater Beat. Now, she returns with the next novel, Sleepwater Static, coming out May 26th, 2020. Let’s welcome Kathrin Hutson to the blog!

Thanks for joining us again Kathrin Hutson. We’re excited to learn about the follow up novel, Sleepwater Static. Can you give us an introduction to what the second novel is about? No spoilers!

Of course! (Nobody likes spoilers…) In a nutshell, Sleepwater Static is definitely the continuation of the storyline as it pertains to the organization called Sleepwater and the people like Leo in Book 1 with the ability to “spin a beat”. Only Book 2 focuses on a different main character, Bernadette Manney, who was a supporting character in Book 1. This was always the plan—to write each book in the Blue Helix series using a supporting character from previous books as the main character in the next. There’s so much to explore within this Dystopian world, and I wanted to tap into different personalities and experiences within the overarching story, because they feel important to highlight.

So we get to see Bernadette—a seventy-one-year-old white woman from the South with a complicated past—up close and personal. After Leo and this Sleepwater chapter parted ways at the end of Sleepwater Beat, we now get to follow what happens to the small group of people as they flee across the country and go into hiding. Bernadette takes them to Hollywood, South Carolina to lay low so a woman in their group can have her baby in secret, and Bernadette’s past finally catches up to her while she’s struggling to ensure a safer future for the people she’s come to love as her chosen family.

Previously you mentioned you put a lot of yourself into the protagonist Leo Tieffler for Sleepwater Beat. She sounds like a complicated character. Does Leo continue to reflect you as she develops in Sleepwater Static?

This is an excellent question, and while Leo definitely makes a very important appearance in Sleepwater Static, this story isn’t exactly hers. However (and much to my surprise), writing Bernadette reflected quite a bit more of my own experiences as well than I originally expected. I did set out with the intention of writing Book 2—beyond being another fantastic story—to specifically highlight more marginalized communities of people I never touched on in Book 1. Sleepwater Static explores discrimination on the level of race, racism, interracial relationships and transracial families, mental illness, mental and emotional abuse, and the struggles of raising a child in a world that just keeps “getting worse”.

How does this apply to me? I belong to several marginalized communities myself, and while I haven’t been discriminated against because of race, I spent many years living in South Carolina with my husband (that’s where he’s from) and have experienced and/or witnessed this discrimination as a friend, family member, and POC ally. I also what it’s like to feel so much shame that I end up running away from it instead of facing it head on and what it’s like to be a mother and struggle with personal identity throughout parenthood (both of which are things Bernadette and I have in common). Bernadette most definitely holds parts of myself and my past, and she also serves as a look into the future I see is possible but that I really do hope never comes to pass.

There are 3 books planned in the Blue Helix series (Sleepwater Static being the second), is this still the case?

I will say there are at least three books planned. I’ve already chosen the next main character for Book 3, and I have a feeling readers who love the Blue Helix series are really going to get excited when they hear who that is (again, no spoilers even for the series plans!). Of course, it’s impossible to know whether the story is truly finished with a third book until I actually get to the end of it. There may be more, there may not be. Not really knowing is definitely part of the excitement for me as well.

You’ve discussed ‘writing by the seat of my pants’ and some of your world building before.
How do you keep track of the world building?

Luckily, for the most part, this world is about 85% true to our real world. The present timeline (because both books do dive into the past, as will Book 3) is set in 2031, just far enough into the future to make this undoubtedly Dystopian and still eerily close to home with what we’re currently experiencing in modern society. So the only real world-building I’ve had to keep track of is this organization of Sleepwater and the historical elements I’ve added of people with this “beat” ability. In Sleepwater Beat, I used chapter interludes of news clips and radio shows to build the world. In Sleepwater Static, I use letters written from Bernadette’s childhood pen pal, who eventually becomes a very close friend (and then some) and follows Bernadette from the past timeline into the present.

This is also “by the seat of my pants”. But I can say that while I’m writing these books, I’ve somehow developed an ability to remember what I’ve previously written and keep the working parts of the dystopian world in line with where the story’s headed as I’m writing. I might chalk this up to having spent so many years editing fiction manuscripts for other authors. Or maybe it’s just the way my mind works. But I never really had to build maps or lay out blueprints for the world t keep myself on track. As far as I’ve heard from advanced readers and my editor, there aren’t any discrepancies

Mental Damnation IV Title and Synopsis Reveal

Behind the curtains of consciousness…
Reality is masked through a Dream.
In a false sense of Purity.

COVER AND SYNOPSIS REVEAL
Mortal is the concluding novel of the Mental Damnation tetralogy.

SYNOPSIS
—
Krista’s hope to escape Dreadweave Pass lessens after a fateful attack from the fallen angel Sporathun. Her purpose in the afterlife is put into question as the Weaver’s army shift their strategy to hasten the fallen god’s freedom once and for all.
In reality, the humans keep Krista under tight watch as her symptoms worsen. Dr. Alsroc enforces further usage of drugs to counter her Mental Damnation. Paladin attempts to keep Krista out of the brewing politics of his kingdom and find a peaceful resolution for the humans and vazeleads.
Darkwing longs to hold his dear Krista again, as he and his allies discover the hidden path to the surface world. Yet, only Krista can escape from the land of the damned. To obtain freedom, she must learn to fend for herself as her father and allies had taught her – the path of a warrior, one painted with blood and carved with death.
—

This summer, damnation ends.

The post Mental Damnation IV Title and Synopsis Reveal appeared first on Konn Lavery.

Formatting a Novel for Print

As an indie author, or as a small press, you may find yourself needing to learn about formatting a novel for print. There are lots of applications out there, and detailed tutorials that can show you how. In the end, layout and formatting is a skill that a graphic designer would know. That doesn’t mean that you can learn the basics to save some time or money. If you can afford to hire a designer, I would recommend going this route. A graphic designer adds an extra level of polishing when it comes to formatting a novel for print.

This blog post is a complimentary piece to the previous series that I had written called DIY Graphic Design for Authors. In there, we talk about a lot of design theory, tools, technicalities, and why you might have to do graphic design on your own.

Author DIY Graphic Design Series







The Basics of DesignColour TheoryTypefaceLayoutTools & Technicalities



Print Terminology

Formatting a novel for print requires knowledge of terminology found within the print industry. These terms are in the Author DIY Graphic Design Tools and Technicalities post, where we discussed print specs. I highly recommend reviewing the terminology so you can understand some of the following resources.

Choosing A Print Shop

We will briefly cover selecting a print shop option. There are different ways you can go about printing your novel, such as finding a local printer in your area. Your choice will depend on the area that you are living in, and you will have to talk to your printshop individually.

Online, you can find distributors such as:

Amazon’s Kindle Direct Publishing ProgramBlurbIngramSparkLulu

Each of the websites mentioned above offers print-on-demand services. For the sake of this article, we will say that you are going with Amazon’s KDP. There, they have a list of resources describing what you canon cannot do and what is required for you to print with them.

Knowing Your Genre When Formatting a Novel for Print

Okay, you have your printshop picked, now you need to know what type of book you want. Amazon has a particular page on the resource that outlines your different print options. You can pick various options based on what you’d like. However, it is also crucial for you to know what readers would expect.

For example, non-fiction softcover books are generally larger than fiction, sitting at 6”x9”. Fiction books are often smaller when it comes to softcover books. Note that Amazon will only do softcovers. Websites like blurb offer a hardcover option.

Ask yourself, what type of book are you formatting? If it is fiction, what kind of genre? You will see on Amazon’s print options that you can print on white paper or cream paper. You can also change the cover paper type from either gloss or matte. These options will let you add your personal touch. For example, a cream paper might work well for fantasy. White Paper could work well for a thriller.

Take your time in picking your printshop and knowing your print options. The website or printshop that you use may depend on what you are looking for in your print options.

Software for Formatting a Novel for Print

There are plenty of software options out there. The industry standard is Adobe InDesign. You can subscribe to their Creative Cloud to obtain the software. Keep in mind, it can be pricey. There are other options out there as well, such as:

QuarkAffinity PublisherMicrosoft WordPages (for Mac)

There are more out there as well, but these are some of the most common formatting software. All the ones mentioned do cost money. If you know of some freeware, please mention it in the comments and I’ll add it into the list. Chances are you are writing your book in Microsoft Word. It is not the best tool for formatting, but it is possible.

You will need to do self-learning. The level of learning will depend on your existing skill-base and the software that you are using. The interfaces do vary. Thankfully, a lot of them do follow the same terminology because there are specific rules to follow when it comes to print.

Using Amazon as an example, they have a walk-through guide on building your book in Microsoft Word or Pages. Note: You can use these articles to help format your book for any print shop. They have some helpful advice.

Getting the Right Specs for Formatting a Novel for Print

Remember, we discussed knowing what type of book you want to format? Your choice becomes essential because you need to know the dimensions to set the file. For example, if you’re working with a book size of 5” x 8”, you’ll want to make sure that the document layout size is set accordingly.

This option comes up automatically when you’re working with software such as Adobe InDesign, or Affinity Publisher. With Microsoft Word, this is under the menu “layout.” Here you’re also able to control the page margins and choose if you need bleeds or not. Chances are, you do not need bleeds unless you have pictures within the book that takes up the full page.

Paragraph Styles

One consistent tool throughout the different software is known as paragraph styles. When you’re formatting a novel for print, you want to be sure to use this tool. In Microsoft Word, it is right on the home tab under styles.

In Adobe InDesign, there is a panel called paragraph styles. The same goes for Affinity Publisher. You want to use paragraph styles for your chapter titles, and the body content of the chapters. In short, you want the following paragraph styles:

Chapter Title StyleContent StyleFirst Paragraph StyleEver notice that the first paragraph in books isn’t indented like the rest of the sections? That is by using a new paragraph style.



Editing a Paragraph Style in Word



Why Paragraph Styles Are Important

When formatting a novel for print, paragraph styles will ensure that the entire book follows the same typography throughout. If you ever need to adjust, you edit the style, and it updates throughout the whole document. Sometimes as you are formatting a novel, you find that you might not like font size, or the particular typeface you are using. If you stick to using styles for that say, the chapter title, then updating all chapter titles, will be easy.

Another benefit of using paragraph styles is you can automatically create a table of contents if you need it. The feature is beneficial if you are working with non-fiction, where a table of contents is typical.

Setting Up Paragraph Styles in Affinity Publisher



Choosing the Right Typeface

There’s a whole article in the author DIY graphic design series that covers typography. In short, more often than not, you want to use a serif font for your content style. For chapter styles, you can use a sans serif. For the content style, be sure to use justified text.

Left Justifying text alignment ensures that the paragraphs take up the whole page. This makes it easier for readers to read pages quicker.



Covers

The cover design is a whole other topic. We’ll briefly go over it by explaining that you need the cover, the back design, and the spine design when you’re working with print. The back of the book often contains the synopsis of the novel, the ISBN code, and the author’s website.

The spine is trickier because the total page count defines its width. So technically, you cannot create the spine until we know the total page count of your book. The spine’s width is why formatting the interior of the novel before the cover, back design, and the spine is essential.

Using Amazon as an example again, they have a paperback cover template that you can use once you know your total page count. There, it will provide a template for you to use that has margins, bleeds, and the full-size of the cover. It is a convenient tool because the interior also changes size based on the paper type such as cream or white.

Choosing the Right Design for Your Formatting

Another struggle that you can run into is knowing what type of layout you want. Here, we go back to knowing what kind of book you’re formatting. Knowing your genre and audience will define what kind of typeface to use, the font size, margins, and all other details. You can also look at other novels for inspiration. Look at your bookshelf, or go to the bookstore, and flip some pages inside a book to see how they are formatted.

Proofs

If you have a printer at home, it is quite helpful to print one page of the interior to see what it looks like hands-on. Sometimes when you are looking at a screen, you can get a distorted view of what the page will look like in its final form.

Most online services, and even print shops, will give you a proof copy. The proof will let you confirm correct sizing, formatting, and all other nitpicky details. I highly recommend ordering a proof copy when you are formatting a novel for print.

Summary

We’ve covered a lot in a short amount of words. Truthfully, formatting a book is a lot of work. Chances are you will make mistakes on your first go. Be patient, remember that you are learning something new, and be sure to search for tuotrials that can help you with the software that you are using. For more insight into graphic design, be sure to check out the previously written articles.

The post Formatting a Novel for Print appeared first on Konn Lavery.

Self-Isolation Adventures

Wow, the world sure has been thrown upside down. The whole COVID-19 has shaken up every country on the planet. Now we all are having our self-isolation adventures. Some places in the world have had it far worse than others, and the media is covering it all. News changes by the hour. Cases and death rates rise drastically. Yikes. Scary times.

Welcome to another edition of Unprocessed Thoughts

We all know what state the world is in, and my fellow Canadians know how our country is. So, I won’t get into the same stuff as everyone else except…. STAY HOME. Okay, I’m done now. In regard to this whole pandemic and writing, not too bad. We are writers are used to being stuck in our own minds, typing away at the next book. This comes naturally for us. What will be interesting to see is how stamina upholds for staying at home. If you’re typically an introvert, then that won’t be a problem.

I already work from home, as of April 1st, for 6 years as a graphic designer and web developer. Between the writing and contract work, the work-from-home-life is straightforward. It doesn’t get strange until the evening, where I usually find myself at the pub or socializing. Not anymore.

Self-Isolation Adventures

Due to the current events, my girlfriend now works from home
too. The cat sure didn’t like her napping spot being taken and has retaliated
through disobedience. Outside adventures are limited to the balcony. We wipe
down new items before they enter the unit as if they’re covered in toxic sludge
– better safe than sorry.

The self-isolation adventures have been tame for now. March and April are busy periods with the contract work. All my clients are working from home, too, meaning they also have time to focus on our projects. The sped-up feedback ultimately means work is moving very quickly. In the end, that means payday comes sooner and another slick, and or beautiful, and or elegant, design is birthed.

Lots of Writing

Work has me glued to the chair for many hours of the day. In
the early mornings and evenings, I can either a: stare at the wall and wonder
how life got to this point, or b: write more. I chose the second option. Mental
Damnation IV is coming along quite nicely. It is the longest book I’ve written
to date. The last of the revisions have been done and it will be off to the
editor shortly. If it weren’t for all this time at home, it most likely wouldn’t
be edit-ready until June.

There you have it – lots of work. I’m sure the
self-isolation adventures will get more interesting as the weeks – if not
months – go by. Tomorrow is wine-bottling day, so there will be plenty of
shenanigans in this household.

Beer Note: Parallel 49 Trash Panda

For this month, I tried the Parallel 49 Trash Panda. I’ve
had some friends talk about it before and thought I would give it a go. It’s a
hoppy drink that calls itself a Hazy IPA, sitting at 5.5% alcohol. It comes in
a can, as most of the small breweries are doing these days. Last month I said I
may swing back into lagers. I didn’t. Maybe the bitterness of IPAs is fitting
for the type of year we’re having.

The post Self-Isolation Adventures appeared first on Konn Lavery.

The White Hand novel for Free

In these uncertain times caused by the outbreak of COVID-19, Myself and the Rutherford Manor team felt a need to help people pass the time. We decided that we would offer the award winning novel, THE WHITE HAND, for a limited time to the world for FREE. All we ask is for you to join the Rutherford Manor Clan mailing list with your e-mail address.

Download Form

This includes both The White Hand and the supplemental narrative, Goodbye Irene. 

After you have finished reading the book, please be so kind as to leave a review of the book here on our Facebook Page and on Amazon.

I sincerely hope you enjoy this thrilling book of mystery & murder. I hope that it helps you pass the time and provides a distraction in the uncertain weeks and months to come.

Please stay safe and healthy.

The post The White Hand novel for Free appeared first on Konn Lavery.

Secrets of the Universe

Are we living in a narrow viewpoint of reality, or is this
all there is? One can go mad, trying to dig too deep into the big questions.
You can be labelled a conspiracy nut for thinking outside of the box. Understandably
so as we cannot comprehend what we do not understand. Don’t go looking too
close, or you’ll stand out, and they are watching.

Secrets of the Universe is March’s short story that brings you into a sci-fi conspiracy about where the secrets of the universe reside. It is loosely tied to the previous story, Behind You.

Secrets of the Universe

I was never much of a conspiracy fan, that’s probably why
this is a difficult thing for me to share. I’ve been called straight-laced,
level-headed, and head-on-my-shoulder type of a person. My good friend Craig is
into aliens, government cover-ups, and interdimensional vampires. Not me. Maybe
Craig’s rambles prepared me for comprehending what I saw. He would tell me all
about the documentaries he watched on the Internet and show me “proof” videos
of actual alien spiritual encounters. It was all bogus. The quality of those
video productions was evident that they were setup. Anyone can go to a
supermarket and buy a rubber mask to look like an alien. Craig would get pissed
off any time I counted his beliefs. Then, we’d smoke a joint after class, and
everything would be good again. After graduation, everyone kind of went their
own way. That’s typical. Craig left town too, just like I did. Not everyone
leaves though, there’s that one kid who locked himself in his house, thinking
that some dimensional beings were chasing him. I don’t think he will ever leave
his hometown. Strange guy. He always did have the hots for Jane, who also left
our town. I, too, moved away. If I wanted to make something of myself, I knew
that I had to go to college, get some sort of certificate, and start working.
See? Level-headed.

Okay, so, not to bore you with my past, but that’s just to
let you know that I don’t spend all day playing with crystals and listening to the
late-night history channel. I work at a small pub during the evening while
going to school for architectural design. That is where things changed. One of
my instructors is a bit of a spaz. One day, in the evening, he was giving me
some extra lessons on the drafting software we were using, and that’s when I
got to know his inner workings. Roger McCulloch is his name. The building had a
half-a-second outage, just enough to surge the power on the computer, and we
had to restart it. He muttered that they
were interfering with it.

Of course, I had to ask, “who are they?”

Man, let me tell you, that was a mistake. Roger unloaded all
of his theories onto me. He told me that
they controlled civilization. The astral beings that were directly
connected to our government, working in uniform, to suppress the conscious
state of humankind. They don’t do this in one giant bang like we see in the
movies, apparently. The cosmic ones have been creating a trickle effect of
information to brainwashing us for hundreds of years. The subtle changes are
more difficult to notice. Their methods have included false idols through
religious teachings, government policies, clever marketing tactics through the
media, and servants camouflaged as our world leaders. All these means have secret
embedded codes that transcribe messages of obedience, projecting into our
subconscious and rewiring our very thoughts.

Roger’s eyes were wide wild as spit flew from his mouth with
each word he said. I’d never see my instructor like this before. He grabbed me
by the shoulder and held it firmly. A part of me wanted to swat his arm, but I was
frozen with disbelief. He was always a bit of a spaz, but this was eccentric.

He leaned closer to me and said, “this is valuable
knowledge. You have to keep it to yourself and only share to those who need to
know.”

For some reason, I thought it was good to keep humouring him
– maybe in the spirits of Craig. Man, I miss him. I replied, “why are you
telling me?”

“You think differently, kid. I can see it in the questions
you ask in class, and the assignments you hand in. You’re different.”

“And what am I supposed to do with this… knowledge?” I
smiled while asking the question I couldn’t believe that I was playing along
with this nonsense. Just like old times with my friend.

“You don’t believe me,” Roger said, taking his hand back. He
said, “I don’t blame you…” That’s when he went on another tangent, claiming that
I was brainwashed from birth and couldn’t possibly know. It wasn’t my fault,
nor my parents’ fault. These astral beings are ancient and far more
sophisticated than us mere humans. They are using us as some sort of test
animals. Their end goal remains a mystery, but once you start to see the subtle
clues, the thin fabric of reality begins to fall apart all around you. The
construct of our society is only bound by a flimsy membrane like a cloak of illusion,
trying to keep us contained.

At that point, I just wanted to go home. Clearly, I wasn’t
going to get any more learning done about the drafting software. I was better
off searching for some of the answers online rather than listen to Roger
McCulloch.

“That still doesn’t answer my question,” I said. In the back
of my head, I kept smacking myself for humouring Roger, when I know I could have
just ended it there.

“To step out of the box,” Roger said with a smile. “Shift
yourself from one of the sheep and see the world for a really is.”

“And how do I do that,” I asked.

“Just look at the signs,” Roger said. “The astral beings’
encryptions are there… the window into realism. They are engraved on the back
of them. Everywhere. Cameras. Cell phones. Newspapers. Everything we’ve made
has the engraving.”

“On the back of signs?”

“That’s a good place to start.”

After that, Roger and I went back to him instructing, and me
learning. I was surprised that’s where it ended. I’ve dealt with conspiracy
nuts – thanks to Craig – and knew once they started, they couldn’t stop
talking. Roger did. It was relieving. Maybe it has to do with old age or
professionalism, and I caught him on an off day. Either way, the evening continued
as normal, and I went home.

The next day was when things changed. For some reason, I
couldn’t stop thinking about what Roger said. I was waiting for the bus, having
a smoke. I was the only one out this early in the AM. The transit was a complete
mess to get to school, but I was determined to learn. Sometimes it got here too
early, other times it got here late. Today was one of the late days. My mind
started to wander to Roger’s words about encryptions while I stared at the bus
stop sign. The words, just look at the signs, were on repeat. I did look
at that sign. Finishing the smoke, I went around to the back and leaned up,
trying to see anything. Nope, just the slab of metal. Maybe a part of me wanted
to believe because of how certain Roger sounded, and how certain Craig always seemed.
I kept staring. There had to be something. That’s what I thought, and I guess I
was right. I spotted something at the corner of the back of the sign. It looked
like a scratch, or maybe as the light reflecting on the surface emphasized the
texture of the metal. No…, this scratch was different. It was intentional.

This part of my story is probably where all reinforcement I made about being level-headed is going to go out the door. Anyways, I checked my backpack on the ground and hopped onto the pole, climbing up just so I could get a closer look. Bus stop signs aren’t very tall, but I wanted to get really really close. I was about an inch from the nick and saw far more than I could have ever expected. The scratch was maybe a fingernail’s width but was intricately designed. The more I stared at it, the scratch began to mutate, with parts of it phasing out of reality like someone took an eraser to it. As parts of the scratch faded, new, strange alphabets I had never seen before appeared from the centre, moving outward. Lines, shapes, and I think circuit boards. I don’t know. The closer I looked, they continued to float outward. I didn’t blink, staring into the scratch.

The core of the space continued to expand, and I could see more circuitry, then an array of colourful particles. The depth of the core continued onward, with more wiring, colours, and shapes going on forever. My naked eye couldn’t see any more, a magnifying glass was needed to see how many designs were embedded into that small space.

The scratch was certainly strange, and I hopped off the
poll, knowing I couldn’t see any more. Roger was right about that, there was
something on the back of the signs. I snagged my backpack and spotted a person
– no, it wasn’t quite a person – standing about fifteen feet from me. Well, it
was hovering, not standing. It didn’t wear clothes, nor did it have skin. Not
even the light from the sky reflected on it like other objects in the area.
This being was coexisting in our space without being bound by the physical laws
that make it. That makes me sound like a crackpot, hey? Seriously, it was all
grey and had millions of tiny little particles moving up and down its form, all
held together by the translucent outer layer.

The loud sound of a vehicle exhaust erupted and caused me to
jump. Looking over, I saw the bus had just stopped in front of me. The being was
gone. I rubbed my eyes, trying to get some clarity into what I saw. None of it
added up.

The bus ride to school was also abnormal. My phone didn’t
seem to react to my fingers. I tried to check the social media apps, check the
news, even check my email, and nothing. There was only a strange overlay of the
same alien alphabet that I saw on that bus sign scratch, expanding outward from
the screen as new shapes appeared. I’m still not sure if I became consciously
aware of the subtle imagery that was all around our reality, or if that scratch
activated something in my brain. Maybe I accidentally took some psychedelics.
Not that I ever have, but I couldn’t think of any solid reasoning for what I
was seeing.

I didn’t want to freak out and cause a scene, and I needed
answers. Roger. Man, that bus ride felt like an eternity, watching those shapes
fly around the screen of my phone. I even saw them on the ads on the bus,
moving along the ad frames. Craig would not believe this. Finally, the bus ride
did come to an end, and I got off at the regular stop. Two men in black suits were
there. They had shades on, slicked back hair, and briefcases. Strange. I kept
walking once I got off the bus, assuming that they were going to take the
transit. Instead, they began to follow me. It started to freak me out, and I took
a different route to school. The two men kept following. I entered the lobby of
the tower where my school was, took the elevator to the floor below the school,
and then used the stairs to get the correct level. I hoped my little manoeuvre
would shake them from me. It worked.

Once I got into class, I sat down, breathing heavily,
feeling sweat all along my back. I had classic jimmy-leg for the whole session,
watching as Roger instructed the class. I checked my phone, it was still
strange. Occasionally I would look over the classroom door to see if the men in
black were there. No, they were gone. No strange floating particle-people
either. My heart raced. I needed more answers.

The class eventually ended, and I managed to corner Roger
before he left for lunch. This time, my eyes were wide, and I was spitting
saliva, grabbing hold of his shoulder. I rambled on about the scratch on the
back of the bus stop sign, seeing the ever-spiralling inward designs of the
alien language. I checked if we were alone, then told him about the floating
particle being, the men in black, and asked him if he saw any of this.

Roger smiled at me.

“What?” I asked.

“You did look.”

“What did that bus sign do to me?”

“You saw the truth,” Roger said. “You got a glimpse into the
secrets of the universe. Now that your consciousness is expanded, you can see
parts of the world for what it really is.”

“And what is that?”

“A fabricated construct, created by those who wish to
contain us, limiting our true potential.”

“What true potential? And the government is working with
them? Are those men in black going to come back?”

Roger shook his head. “More mysteries of life. I wish I
could answer these for you, but I too only got a glimpse into the secrets.”

“Can I go back to the bus stop, it will tell me more,
right?”

“Don’t do it,” Roger said sternly. “You got away lucky.”

“What you mean?” I asked, letting go of Roger’s shoulder.

“Too much knowledge raises their attention. You saw the astral
being. You saw the government men. That was a warning. Imagine if you found out
more, what they would do if you. If you recall, I said these are sophisticated
beings that have been doing this for centuries.”

“Then why would they have their secret out in the open like
that?”

“I couldn’t tell you. Maybe it is part of their experiment.
Maybe it is a flaw in the technology. All I know is that once I got a glimpse
into the true reality, they wanted me to stay away. I did.”

“Now, you just hold onto this information?”

Roger shrugged. “At least I’m not living in a lie and are
aware of them. I can only share with those that are willing to think
differently. I know you presumed me to be a bit of a nutcase. I don’t blame
you. Imagine if I tried to tell the world, what they would think?”

Roger was right. Craig was right. Whatever these beings had
planned with humanity had been long in initiation before I was born. Whatever
their purpose is remains a mystery. The glimpse that I got from the encoded
message on the back of that bus stop sign was all I could think about.
Eventually, the strange alien alphabet overlay that I saw on everything dissipated.
I guess it had something to do with my consciousness narrowing again. I don’t
know. The men in black never came back. The strange astral being did not
return. I never looked at the bus stop sign again. I told Craig. He laughed at
me. I guess he stopped smoking weed while in college and cleaned himself up.
Now I’m the crazy one.

These astral beings are complex and powerful. They knew
instantly once I got a glimpse into the secrets of the universe. My human brain
can’t even comprehend what they are trying to do. Still, I am tempted to go
back to that bus stop sign – or any sign – and see more about what makes up the
real universe. The mystery gnaws at the back of my mind, wanting to know else
is out there. I want to know more about their agenda, what really exists beyond
this fabrication, and why we are even here to begin with. There are so many
questions for humanity. Then, the façade sinks back in, and I need to pay
bills, finish school, and not be put into the nuthouse. So, I keep my head
down, not rocking the boat, and stay level-headed.

The post Secrets of the Universe appeared first on Konn Lavery.

Postponed 2020 DeadbyCon in Edmonton

First convention of 2020, I will be at Edmonton’s horror convention, Dead by Con.



When and Where?

March 14/15
Sawridge Inn and Conference Centre
4235 Gateway Boulevard NW, Edmonton, Alberta T6J 6S7, Canada
Edmonton
Alberta

Guests and the Event

Learn about all the guests and the event itself at the DEADbyCON website: deadbycon.ca  

Grab Tickets Today!

The post Postponed 2020 DeadbyCon in Edmonton appeared first on Konn Lavery.

2020 DeadbyCon in Edmonton

First convention of 2020, I will be at Edmonton’s horror convention, Dead by Con.



When and Where?

March 14/15
Sawridge Inn and Conference Centre
4235 Gateway Boulevard NW, Edmonton, Alberta T6J 6S7, Canada
Edmonton
Alberta

Guests and the Event

Learn about all the guests and the event itself at the DEADbyCON website: deadbycon.ca  

Grab Tickets Today!

The post 2020 DeadbyCon in Edmonton appeared first on Konn Lavery.