John DeBellis's Blog, page 4

Murder, Broads, And Bones (part 1)

THE DETECTIVE I was sore all over, especially in my rump from the sex change.  It was nothing I hadn’t felt before.   This was my third one; the first two didn’t take, but this baby had all the indications of sticking.  The parts of me that weren’t there anymore weren’t coming back and the new [...]

Catfish Hunter Is An Adult.

I’m not sure if it were 1976-77 or even 1978.   Larry David, Bobby Kelton and I had decided to watch the All-Star game at Larry’s place—an old railroad apartment that led from the tiny kitchen through the bedroom finally to Larry’s living room.  The apartment had the feel of a Salvation Army store that had [...]

I Saved Larry David’s Life

It was around three-fifty on a Friday afternoon when I got the call from Larry David, his voice weak and on the edge of desperation, “Uh…John…it’s Larry…I have problem….” “What kind of problem, LD?” I shot back while muting my TV. “Uh…I’m stuck upside down. “ Back in the early eighties someone proliferated the idea [...]

Some Comedian from the United States

My agent said I had to catch the train back to London at 10:30 or I’d be stuck at the station all night. I had a road gig at a so-called comedy club just out side of Dover.  In reality it was a local pub that managed to throw a microphone in the corner of [...]

Stand-up Comedy at a Female Prison or How to Meet Your Cellmate

About twenty years ago, I think it was a summer day, but it could have been in the dead of winter, for all I know, the gig I was working was in a state Prison in Arizona.  Now, if it had been a prison back east, the first thing I’d do was to see if [...]

How Not to Eat Homemade Spaghetti With a Celebrity

One of the hottest nightclubs in town, JP’s, a musician’s hangout for some of the top names in Pop, welcomed us despite our shallow pockets and outdated clothes. Even huge stars treated us well.  Billy Joel would come to our table for a round of drinks, knowing he would have to pay for them.   Late [...]

My First Real Money As a Comedy Writer

After a really good weekend set at Catch A Rising Star I walked into the bar and was pursued by an audience member who offered to by me a drink. After I accepted he proceeded to lather me with compliments, way too many and far too lofty, which suggested he had way too many drinks [...]

Comedians Stretch Out Small Time

As stand-up comedy grew in popularity and comedians became television personalities, movie stars, writers or annoying phone sales people, the showcase clubs (The Improvisation, Catch A Rising Star, The Comic Strip, and The Comedy Store) that were designed for comics to learn their craft became places to be seen by the movers and shakers, looking [...]

Comedians and Nature or The Young Men and the Lake

My idea of being an outdoorsman is pulling the shade up on my window.  After a few glasses of wine, I may even open the window, but never all the way. Don’t get me wrong I like the sun, the grass, the ocean, the forests, fresh air and lakes—I love reading about them.   See, all [...]

I’d Rather Be Waterboarded Than Watch A New Comedian

You have to literally drag me into a showroom to watch a new stand-up comic.  It’s not because they’re so bad, and many of them are, or they’re so good, and some of them are, or remind me too much of myself, which many of them do.  It’s just that no matter how many drinks [...]