Ruth Ellen Parlour's Blog, page 12

Battling Self-Doubt

I bet most, if not every writer and author goes through self-doubt at some point during their writing life. Nagging thoughts invade my brain saying, ‘I’m not good enough.’ ‘Why don’t you just give up?’ ‘You’ll never earn money writing.’ It is so hard to get over these awful doubts and they keep creeping back to haunt me. When I get negative feedback and reviews the voices resurge with a vengeance. It doesn’t matter how much good feedback I’ve had, one bad review can make me throw my arms up in the air and hover the curser over ‘unpublish this book.’

The only thing I can do is push the doubting thoughts to the back of my mind and keep going. If I don’t give up, if I keep writing and reading and researching then I can only get better. I can’t please everyone with my writing, I make mistakes, learn from them and move on. When you love doing what you do the outcome is logical. I put a lid on the nagging thoughts and move forward. Strive to improve and learn from the past. Do the best I can.

Have you had self-doubt and how do you battle it?

Earth Angel Deleted Scene 08

For some reason I wrote this post then forgot to publish it and carried on with my deleted scenes not realising one was missing!

This is a continuation from Deleted Scene 07 from Chapter 12 – Fire and Water. We join Zenovia and Chetto going to sleep and waking up. That’s why I cut the scenes! Enjoy. No spoilers.

*Warning. Scenes were deleted before the final edits and may contain errors and inconsistencies.*

‘Zenovia. Psst. You awake?’ Chetto’s voice dragged me out the dream.

‘I am now,’ I replied.

‘Sorry,’ he said as my eyes adjusted to the dark. I was greeted by Chetto’s fury face. Faith and Orlando were already asleep and the glowing embers from the fire heated us. It made me wonder if what I heard was real or a dream.

‘What’s the matter?’ I asked in a hoarse whisper.

‘I can’t sleep. It’s too uncomfortable,’ he said as he shuffled position.

‘You’re just too used to sleeping on piles of cushions.’

‘Hey! They treat me well in Hypatia.’

‘What happened to the Chetto who used to sleep in trees and under bushes?’

‘What happened to the Zenovia who was fine without her parents?’

My parents. My stomach twisted at the thought. I think he noticed my reaction and twisted to look at me with his big, shining eyes.

‘Sorry,’ he whispered. ‘I guess I’m jealous. I’d be lying if I said I didn’t want to have parents.’ His fury hand reached out and cupped mine, the warmth comforted me. ‘You still have me, no matter what happens. I’ll be your family,’ he said. A wide smile spread across my face as I felt the itchy prickly of tears.

‘Thank you,’ I whispered, before closing my eyes and letting sleep take me.

Chetto jumped out of bed beside me. Startled, he threw off the covers. The little wolf was squirming and ripping the fur from the blanket. It made me giggle.

‘That made you jump,’ I smiled. My best friend looked at me with his golden cat eyes and playfully extended his claws.

‘You got to sleep in the end then?’ I asked.

‘Yeah but I’ve got this nasty crick in my neck.’ He rolled his furry head around his shoulders. I smiled. I think that wolf song last night changed something within me. I felt empowered. The tiger’s eye amulet was warm around my neck, as I hadn’t taken it off, and didn’t plan to. For me, it was a symbol of hope.

Faith was stirring. She sat up, her thick brown hair dishevelled and her eyes were gummy.

‘Morning.’ I chimed. Her head turned to look at me blinking.

‘Morning,’ she croaked. Our next stop was Hypatia, to my parents. The fact hit me suddenly in my gut. Nira popped her head around the curtain.

‘When you’re ready breakfast is waiting for you.’

Earth Angel is available from Amazon for £1

The Next Big Thing Blog Hop!

I was tagged by two of my good writing friends; Clare Davidson and Margaret Alexander for this blog post which I’m writing about my current WIP God Slayer.

Here are the rules:

Give credit to the person/blog that tagged you
Post the rules for this hop
Answer these ten questions about your current WIP (Work In Progress) on your blog
Tag five other writers/bloggers and add their links so we can hop over and meet them.

What is the working title of your book?

God Slayer

Where did the idea come from for the book?

It all started with the character which began as a superhero style character in my teenaged imagination. She grew into something way beyond that and her backstory was so awesome I couldn’t NOT write it down. Another part of the story was inspired by, I think it might have been something from one of Holly Lisle’s courses, which was simply “hunting demons by sense of smell.” Intrigued yet?

What genre does your book fall under?

YA high/heroic Fantasy

Which actors would you choose to play your characters in a movie rendition?

I’m not sure about the main character, but I have a military commander who I thought would be well played by Hugh Jackman.

What is the one-sentence synopsis of your book?

Mutated into a hybrid, Catrin hunts undead demons that plague Eardesha and attempts to uncover the truth about her curse.

Will your book be self-published or represented by an agency?

I self-published my first novel, Earth Angel, and I’ll be doing the same for this.

How long did it take you to write the first draft of your manuscript?

I wrote it in 5 months, in the summer in between my undergrad degree and master’s degree.

What other books would you compare this story to within your genre?

It’s a bit darker than Earth Angel. I would compare it to Karen Miller’s Empress but more for YA and with good guys.

Who or What inspired you to write this book?

The main character. She’s a strong woman facing numerous hardships and doing her best to do the right thing. She led me into her life and her story was so compelling to me it would be a travesty not to record it. The story also involves the struggle between two different races where I’ve been inspired by the history of black culture and women in the middle east.

What else about your book might pique the reader’s interest?

I’ll leave you with the full synopsis to whet you’re appetite.

Cursed from birth, in her adulthood Catrin mutates into a hybrid – a creature part animal, part human and shunned by society. She joins the military in an attempt to control her new power but she only makes enemies who mean to kill her. Eardesha is plagued by undead demons and Catrin makes it her purpose to track their origin and find the true purpose of her curse.

You’ve been tagged!

Sally Stephenson

Sara – DasteRoad

Kat Ellis

Carrie – DeAubreyDigest

Victoria Walters

Earth Angel Deleted Scene 13

Sorry I forgot to post this yesterday guys! Had other things on my mind and completely forgot! This deleted scene is from Chapter 20 – The last night. Viper tells Faith her plans for the war.

*Warning. Scenes were deleted before the final edits and may contain errors and inconsistencies.*

They had never met the Wolfpack Commander, only heard the legends, but Faith would not let the woman scare her. They were stood in an unnecessarily large meeting room. A long, oval table and chairs stood in the middle but no one took them up. Commander Viper first looked at Black, the great dog’s eyes stared dead at the Commander but he remained silent.

‘Thank you for coming Angel, your support is much needed.’

‘It is my duty as an Angel to protect Eardecia,’ Faith answered.

‘And Eardecia is very grateful. I’m assuming you know the threat we face,’ Viper said.

‘I know that the Krieger are planning on resurrecting the Darkness from the First Days of Light, Peralda told this to me, she also told me a second Angel will be arriving to. When the Kriegerian army arrives we need find the Krieger who would summon the Darkness and kill it. I’m assuming it will be heavily protected,’ said Faith. Viper was quiet for a moment, her face was an unreadable mask.

‘I see,’ said the commander. Faith wondered if she would say anymore but she didn’t. ‘I’ll arrange a group of my best men to protect you during the battle. Your safety is my first priority,’ Viper said as she paced slowly, claws clicking of the tiles. ‘I shall have quarters arranged for you all.’

‘There is no need, our airship will do us fine. We are hoping it will stay for the battle. Their cannons and archers will serve us well,’ Faith answered. Viper nodded. ‘Have we got the support of anyone else?’ Faith asked.

‘Queen Persephone of Oralia and King Leo of Hypatia are sending down a large regiment of knights and warhorses. Emperor Kari is sending a regiment of Razor women from Dollonai which will be part of the secondary army if we fail here. My plan is to use the skills of the convicts here to win the battle.’

‘You’re making them fight?’ Faith retorted. Viper stood poised, glaring down at the Angel.

‘Indeed I am Angel. They will be a great asset in this battle. We need as much help as we can get, our Wolfpack forces are too small in number to face the Krieger unaided. I want to end the fight before it starts. We don’t even know how many of them there will be.’ Viper’s tone was sharp and cold like ice. Faith wanted to protest, but the Commander was probably right. She felt uncomfortable in the company of the elite warrior.

‘If we’re finished here we’ll return to the ship,’ Faith stated.

‘We will keep you informed.’ Viper gestured to the door. The Commander had her own plans it seemed.

Hope you enjoyed that and thanks for reading!

My Review – Writing Fight Scenes by Rayne Hall

I bought this eBook from a recommendation by one of my writing friends and it has been an inspiring, useful tool. Rayne Hall writes clearly and concisely with an easy to follow structure.

He begins with the basics of writing fight scenes with mood and style: gritty or entertaining. Then discusses how location is used in fight scenes and a structure that fight scenes should follow.

Hall describes a number of various weapons commonly used in fiction from swords and daggers, staffs, axes, clubs to firearms and variables in between. He offers background knowledge on their uses, strengths and weaknesses. At the end of each chapter he offers a helpful list of ‘blunders to avoid’.

He also covers unarmed combat, magical weapons, self-defence and strength versus skill. He discusses the psychology of fighting: how adrenaline and hormones affect the fighters and how men and women react differently in fighting situations. Other topics covered include animals, armour, group fights, battles, siege warfare, nautical fights and how fights are portrayed in different genres.

Hall covers writing tips such as using euphonics, pacing and dialogue. One thing I like about this ebook is that Hall offers links to useful YouTube videos and websites to demonstrate the information he describes. Hall has undergone extensive research to make this ebook a useful background on weapons for any writer choosing to use them. Many tips and tricks within the book has inspired and enhanced my own writing to make it more accurate and believable.

I would certainly recommend this eBook.

Have you read it? How useful did you find it while writing?

Writing Fight Scenes" target="_blank">Writing Fight Scenes by Rayne Hall Amazon UK

Writing Fight Scenes" target="_blank">Writing Fight Scenes by Rayne Hall Amazon US

Writing Fight Scenes by Rayne Hall Smashwords

Earth Angel Deleted Scene 12

In Chapter 17 – The Temple of War – Zenovia and Co get an elephant ride into the jungle. In this deleted scene Faith negotiate’s the ride and it’s passengers. No spoilers. Enjoy!

*Warning. Scenes were deleted before the final edits and may contain errors and inconsistencies.*

The room we were in was small. It had bare plastered walls and two benches to wait on. I sat looking at a carved wooden idol from Dollonai depicting a face of which importance I didn’t know. Raskal was happily sniffing at something under the bench, pulling endlessly on his lead. A young man of dark complexion stood behind the desk talking to Faith.

‘I need a ride to the temple,’ she stated. The young man opened his writing book.

‘When do you need it for?’ he asked with his sharp accent.

‘Now,’ she answered. The man looked up with surprise.

‘You need to book a ride at least one day in advance.’

‘I need a ride immediately.’

‘I will have to see if there are any drivers free at this time, it will cost you a little extra,’ he said, closing the book slowly, pencil wiggling between slim fingers.

‘That’s fine.’

‘And no animals allowed on the ride.’ The man looked over at me.

‘I can’t leave him behind, he’s only a pup,’ I pleaded. The man looked at Raskal with accepting eyes.

‘Fine, but the other one will have to walk, it’s far too big’ he answered, gesturing to Black stood at Faith’s waist. He was clearly more than a little intimidated by the hound’s intense gaze. The animal did not flinch.

‘He can walk, it’s fine.’ Faith snapped.

‘I’ll just check if there’s anyone available to take you. Wait here,’ he said before he disappeared behind a beaded curtain that clinked together before hanging still again.

‘There wasn’t such a hassle last time,’ Faith murmured to herself, crossing her arms and shifting her weight impatiently. The man quickly returned through the beaded curtain.

‘There is a driver waiting for you, if you could please pay first and then follow me.’

Earth Angel Deleted Scene 11

From Chapter 16 – Memories, I cut this entire scene as it did not move the plot forward. Although the event still happened, I used a short reflective statement from one of the characters about the event instead of using the scene. No spoilers. Enjoy!

*Warning. Scenes were deleted before the final edits and may contain errors and inconsistencies.*

There were two large rooms that were rarely ever used. Hard yellow and green lichens grew between every grey tile that covered the surfaces. Drains, covered by a rusty metal grate ran along the floor ready to swallow up the waste water. Dripping pipes ran in a grid above their heads. The women were separated from the men and each group was sent into a different hall.

‘See you soon,’ Dogga had said with a wink before leaving a curious Jewelz and a scared Emz. In a separate room, each group were instructed to strip and discard their clothes in a trolley.

‘I’d better get them back,’ Jewelz grumbled as she reluctantly placed her now dirty white shirt, trousers and shoes into the trolley. No prison guards were permitted into the hall full of women, instead some female Wolfpack members watched over the convicts.

The women were crammed into the room, huddled and shivering. Emz clung onto Jewelz’s arm, her head only reaching to Jewelz’s shoulder while shyly trying to hide her modesty. Jewelz seemed unaffected by her nakedness. Suddenly the taps were turned on. Sprays of freezing water jetted out of holes all along the pipes. The hall of women was filled with high-pitched shrieks. Jess pulled at the matted cord that tied back her hair and shook out the greasy black mane, soaking up the heavenly water. Her hair had grown long since being in prison. She hated it long. She also started to see strands of grey trying to hide unsuccessfully, I’m getting old, she thought. Everyone was grateful for the gift, all but Emz. She cowered beside Jewelz, staring at the floor, and shivered from the cold, her big ears flat and dripping.

 

In the male’s hall Dogga seemed downhearted, wishing they could share with the women. Dogga took off his bandana; the red piece of material that had been tied around his forehead for so long had created a white band of skin spared by the unforgiving sun. Several convicts mocked Dogga, but he just laughed with them. The men made a conscious effort to avoid touching anyone, even in the tight space. The air of apprehension was almost tangible. Dogga pushed to a spot where there was more water falling and rubbed it into his dirty skin, not minding the freezing temperature. It was soothing on his scars and sunburn.

 

When the water ceased to fall the convicts were ushered back into the room in which they had stripped minuets before. Guards and Wolfpack members were handing out clean clothes. They had to wait in a queue, naked and dripping wet.

‘I want my clothes back!’ Jewelz yelled as a warrior thrust some clean clothes into her wet hands.

‘You won’t be seeing them again,’ the woman replied. Jewelz squeaked in horror. Still wet, Emz quickly pulled the baggy brown t-shirt over her mat of red hair, and tugged her lame ear through the hole. The cotton was a bit harsh on her skin, but it was clean and that’s all she cared about. She pressed her nose into the fabric and took a long deep breath, no sweat. It clung to her skin in patches of damp that would soon dry. The t-shirt was far too big for her, but she didn’t complain. She pulled on the rough trousers, feeling the bulge where her fluffy tail was.

Dogga struggled to find a pair of sandals from the rack to fit his big feet. Convicts everywhere were laughing with glee at the new clothes and shoes. Some of the inmates were making a fuss about wanting their own clothes, but they had already been taken away to be burned. The guards and Wolfpack soldiers were not listening to their complaints. The guards started leading clothed prisoners back to the dayroom. The three women regrouped with Dogga and made themselves comfortable in their spot on the floor.

Earth Angel is available on Amazon for £1

Earth Angel Deleted Scene 10

We join Dogga in Chapter 13. No spoilers. Enjoy!

*Warning. Scenes were deleted before the final edits and may contain errors and inconsistencies.*

Dogga had got little sleep that night; his mind was too awake, too busy thinking about Jewelz; how beautiful she was, what he could say to her and other thoughts that plagued his mind as he wriggled on the hard mattress, angrily throwing his blanket about the bed. The convict awoke in a yelp of pain when he banged an elbow against the solid brick wall, a bad habit of his. Despite the cold, Dogga’s body was warm, sweat rubbing away the flaky dirt and stinging his sunburn. He was afraid he would speak aloud in his sleep in excited rasps but all was quiet in the cellblock. He would start to think about Jewelz, then tiredly sink into a hazy dream about her, her smiling face morphed into another, more familiar face which made him wake once more and repeat the cycle. Dogga grew impatient, waiting for the morning to finally end the awful sleep pattern, and to see her again.

Real Writers Bounce

Me Bouncing

I recently had my first experience of a ‘hater’ or at least that’s what I’m going to call it. I recently asked someone who I trust and respect to read my novel, Earth Angel, and give me their personal, constructive opinion. This person shall remain anonymous and be referred to as ‘they/IT’

I’ll not bore you with details but they didn’t like it. At all. I’m not sure if IT was expecting me to be as good as the bestselling fantasy writers but IT was incredibly harsh, accusative and downright nasty. It made me cry. Seriously. IT did give me some useful things though, some tips, good books to read and where I can listen to good podcasts and read articles. IT’s behaviour made me depressed and I had to silence the voice in the back of my mind telling me I should just quit.

I love writing, I wouldn’t quit for anyone.

I confided in someone very dear to me who has been so supportive over the years. He provided this useful bit of insight. That I need to look at my novel as an experiment, whether or not that experiment was a success or not doesn’t matter as long as I can learn from the mistakes and use them to improve myself, making the next novel better.

Earth Angel was my first book; I was 22 years old when I published it. I know it won’t compete with the bestselling fantasy writers. I can only use the experience to learn from it and move forward. And that’s what I’m going to do.

Real writers bounce back.

My Review – Make A Killing On Kindle by Michael Alvear

Make A Killing On Kindle (Without Blogging, Facebook Or Twitter). The Guerilla Marketer’s Guide To Selling Ebooks On Amazon by Michael Alvear. I downloaded this book after reading a mention in the Writing Magazine.

Michael Alvear seems to have no delusions about ebook success and writes in a straight forward, no-nonsense manor which is straight to the point and engaging. It is easy to read, understandable and insightful. There are plenty of useful tips looking from a different perspective I have not yet come across as an independent author.

Alvear begins the book claiming that ‘Blogging, Facebook & Twitter are a complete waste of time,’ describing social media as a ‘time-sucking, no-value vortex that cannot sell books.’ I raised my eyebrows in surprise but by the end of the chapter my head was nodding.

Make A Killing On Kindle is a course on steps to enhance sales. Alvear offers good, useable advice on how to create compelling book titles, blurbs and covers. He describes how, it is believed, Amazon’s algorithms work and how to use them to your advantage, how to get to the top of Amazon’s search Engines, picking categories and how to springboard off your competitors.

I wasn’t aware that Amazon used HTML and I never gave a second thought to SEO (search engine optimization) but Alvear offers a crash course in how to use both of these to your advantage. He covers pricing strategies, front and back matter, getting reviews, sales rankings and how to utilize the author page on Amazon.

I found these tips genuinely useful as I’ve never come across them reading other books by John Locke and Mark Coker. It opened my eyes to how Amazon works, how readers engage with Amazon and your book and how to make the best use of both. Make A Killing On Kindle is worth several reads as the wealth of information is worth sinking in and applying as best you can to make the most of Amazon, your book and its readers.

Pros;

Very useful and applicable information on Amazon and reaching readers
No-nonsense, straight to the point writing style

Cons;

It costs £3.19 but I did feel every penny was worth it!
I would certainly recommend it over John Locke’s book.

Make A Killing On Kindle (Without Blogging, Facebook Or Twitter). The Guerilla Marketer's Guide To Selling Ebooks On Amazon" target="_blank">Make A Killing On Kindle by Michael Alvear Amazon UK

Make A Killing On Kindle (Without Blogging, Facebook Or Twitter). The Guerilla Marketer's Guide To Selling Ebooks On Amazon" target="_blank">Make A Killing On Kindle by Michael Alvear Amazon US

Have you read Make A Killing On Kindle? What did you think and have you applied the techniques described? I’d love to know!