Bud Smith's Blog: Bud Smith , page 3

ACLU

don’t stare directly into the sun or the Internet 

help a child cross the wild headlight highway 

gather the wild horses too running though the neighborhood

all the flowers will be stomped 

if not for you  

if not for you and 

all your perfect ordinary grace 

everything we worried about yesterday has these bigger teeth now 

has these eyes with pupils like whirlpools 

it’s fine to reach in the dragon’s mouth and rip a tooth out 

flag down a friend, have them reach in too 

a piano can do no damage, falling out a window on one thousand people in the streets with their hands up as one force   

I believe in staring directly at the moon though and touching the sea

because the sea is this place tied to the fantastic and pulling us along 

so the fires sweeping across our desert lives extinguish just in time for the stars to blink on across the darkened dome of everybody’s different sky 

before we had TV there was only quiet infinity before there was twitter I had to come over 

please don’t climb forever into the hills and never come back this place swells extravagant when you are here 

and shrinks into nothing when you are gone.

Happy Birthday, Happy Veteran’s Day

1 

Last night I walked down a cobblestone street in the city and as I was thinking about how long it’s been there and how during its cobblestone lifespan there’s been all the horrible bullshit that has happened to society and all the good things that have happened to society. 

By a stoop, I overheard a woman talking to another woman and she said, “That motherfucker deserves to be kicked in his tiny little balls and I want to be the one to do it!” 

A couple blocks up, there was an old man sitting on a bench waiting to get in a restaurant and he was hissing into a cellphone, and he too wants to fight the guy that’s supposed to be president. 

I wish for two things:

These cobblestones to never get paved over and for these beautifully combative, clear minded people to never leave New York. I love them so much. All of them.



2

Later in the night, I was sitting at a restaurant on the street last night and a man walked up on the sidewalk next to my table and was asking for money because he was a Marine and having a hard time. While I searched my pockets, he asked other people for help, all the while singing “From the halls of Montezuma! To the halls of Tripoli! …” and doing a little march, and generally and truthfully talking about his time in the service. I had no money in my jacket and no money in my pants.

Don’t you know it, there were all these rich assholes coming out of the hotel across the street, and goddamn you should have seen them looking right though this man, as he talked to them, it was like like he was a ghost. 

Found out that the birthday of the Marine Corps is the same day as my wife’s birthday. He told me that. Happy birthday USMC! Happy birthday Rae Buleri!

My wife was in the bathroom of the restaurant and when I couldn’t find even a dollar in my pocket for the Marine, I opened up her purse that was sitting by my feet and found some money, and I had to leave the table and walk down the street a little bit to catch the Marine, but I caught him on the corner talking to some people who were dressed up like they were going to the opera and on the way to the opera they weren’t in the mood to be held up by anyone who doesn’t have gold dust for blood. 

Had a talk with the Marine on the corner, shook his hand, thanked him for his service, gave him the money I robbed out of my wife’s purse on her birthday and the birthday of the Marine Corps. It wasn’t much money but he looked at it and said, “Damn man, you didn’t have to do that …”

We don’t have to do anything, ya know, technically.

When I got back to the table, my wife still wasn’t at the table, and when she came back we finished our meal, paid and walked over to the next place to celebrate the rest of her birthday. On the walk, a homeless man flagged her down and without missing a beat she gave him this huge sloshing handful of change that she keeps in her giant jacket so she can ride the bus from our apartment in jersey city to the path station that takes her into new york city.

I don’t know, I think there is so much goodness in this world and most of it we can’t even understand, or identify, let alone be empathetic with. It all comes down to people who sometimes can’t see beyond the immediate forcefield of their own life. I feel that way too much, caught up in my own bullshit and oblivious to what others are going through … but when someone comes walking down the street and sings, you have to hear that song.

Happy Veteran’s Day today. I’m off of work today. We switched President’s Day for Veteran’s Day as a holiday in our contract at work and I’ve never been more happy to think about that. Sitting in my apartment, thinking about my grandpa who in world war two worked in the shipyards, and from doing that work, he began my family’s line in the trade work that I do now. 

Saluting all you Veterans, thank you for fighting for a country I am thrilled to have been born into, because we have the right to do things like march en masse through the streets and voice our concerns about this that and the other thing. 

Nothing is perfect, except my wife, who when I mentioned I stole five bucks from her to give to the Marine, she looked upset I hadn’t been able to find any more money to rob from her to pass on.

New Book / New Stories

Hello, 

I hope everyone is doing good. I’ve got some friends riding  out Hurricane Matthew in Florida, but it looks like they’re gonna be okay. Was worried about one friend in particular who lives in a punk house that is collapsing anyways on a blue sky day. Anyways, looks like Florida will keep on Florida-ing. Yuss! Punk House will live on. 

Heard some news last week. Civil Coping Mechnanisms (CCM) will be putting out my memoir/essay collection called Same Clothes As Yeaterday in June 2017. Excited about that. 

Also, today at Hobart, I have two pieces of flash, “Red Teeth” and “Do Ya Wanna Dance?” They’re here

It’s October and most everybody is happy that it’s hooded sweatshirt weather.  I’ve had some writing fall through the cracks lately and wanted to share a list here if you are in the mood. 

Here’s my essay about creativity and intuition called Crystal Ball Emoji from Real Pants. 


I’ve been reviewing my life as an ongoing series for Barrelhouse (quick capsule criticisms of dumb things that I’ve experienced as a person on this earth.) Reviews of My Life #1; Reviews of My Life #2


 Hobart published two short stories from my collection, coming in November (from Disorder Press) called Dustbunny City , read them here 


Hobart also ran a story of mine called Boss, about a man struggling with the ghost of Andre the Giant, read Boss here 

Thursday Night in Philly

Hi,

Thursday 9/29 I’ll be reading at Tattooed Mom’s in Philly. Would be cool to see you. Come say hello. 

Also, in November my wife and I have a book coming out called Dustbunny City. 

My Story “Boss” Published at Hobart

Life is such a maze. It’s easy to get lost in the maze but most of the time you can get through the worst part of the maze by working together with other people passing through the maze. I wrote this story, Boss, thinking about the many people I’ve known in my life who have temporally gotten lost, depressed, pained, suicidal … I believe that people can actually help each other, and make a difference in each other’s life. Check in on your friends and family and neighbors. Make sure everyone is feeing good and if they aren’t, do what you can to help them along through the maze. 

Thank you!

Here’s my story Boss at Hobart 

Essay About Dogs

Conspiracists think that Hilary Clinton had a body double yesterday that went around and did double double stuff, that’s cool. I would like a body double for myself also. To do body double stuff. Like work in the plastic plant where I am working today. Where all the plastic powder looks like cocaine and every new person you work with at the plastic factory who has never seen the plastic powder in the plastic factory makes the joke, “Ha! Looks like cocaine!”

I’m on break right now at work but wanted to share an essay with you … Rae and I are watching my parent’s dogs. We are dog parents right now, but luckily will be free of them by the time it’s time to pay for dog college or dog weddings. I wrote about the experience for Real Pants, as well as some thoughts on Pumpkin Spice bringing about the end times of earth, the novel Lonesome Dove, and grapes.

Check out the essay here 

An essay about working in a nuclear power plant

Hello Everybunny, 

I have been writing an essay almost every week about the intersection between creativity and working a labor intensive job away from the computer desk. The essays are all collected here . Thanks to Adam Robinson and Amy McDaniels for the support at their site, Real Pants and continuing to host the essay series. 

This week’s essay is called Nuclear and it is about what it is like to do temporary outage work at a nuclear power plant. No two nuclear outages are the same, and my experience there is probably not a common one, but, I shared my story here if you are interested. 

Thank you 

“Roast Beast” at Maudlin House

It’s Friday and I’m at work. I have a new story at Maudlin House called “Roast Beast“. It’s about my new neighborhood in Jersey City. I like the new neighborhood. Check out the story here and please send it around to all your friends who like lunch meat, flip flops, rockabilly music and super heroin. 

In other news, I’ve been watch the Netflix show The Get Down and there was a pretty badass part last night where Grand Master Flash taught the kids who to mix two turntables together to make an everlasting beat for the MCs to rap ova. I’ll give you a hint, it involves a crayon. Anyways, great TV show. 

Also, I’ve been working on my next book, Dustbunny City, coming out around thanksgiving from Disorder Press … So psyched to mail out early review copies of the book in about a month, month and a half. I’ll keep you posted about it, as those things go. 

Thank you for rocking

Bud 

New Essay at Fanzine

drawing by michael seymour blake

There’s a month of summer left. I’m looking forward to getting watermelon punch drunk this weekend and doing some night swimming. It’s 109 degrees here today at the oil refinery. Jeez Louise. 

Very happy that today over at Fanzine I have a new essay called “Our House Is A Very Fine House“. 

It’s about the first house my parent’s were able to afford, one that was vandalized and one that my brother and I destroyed even more than the vandals. 

Carabella Sand is one of my favorite artists. She drew the house. The house has graffiti on it that says “Fuck Off! This Place Is Haunted!” and it was, it reall was. But not by ghosts. By us. 

Check out the essay here 

All The Work Safe Or Die Trying Essays So Far

Hi Everybody, 

Since the beginning of the year, I’ve been writing an essay a week for Real Pants. The essays are about creativity and working for a living. I work heavy construction in an oil refinery and while I’m there, I write on my cellphone on my breaks. A few of my novels were written that way, most of my stories and poems were written that way. Here’s a list of all the essays so far. I’m really enjoying this project and not sure how long it’s going to keep going, but 22 pieces into it, I’m still having a ball. 

Thanks for reading, thanks for sharing these links with people who you think could gain anything from them. Sometimes we all get stuck in our creative efforts. I hope these essays help some people out of a creative jam they have found themselves in. 

Much love, 

Bud 
Work Safe Or Die Trying Column at Real Pants 

Move Carelessly About Your Life – Pokemon Go! Flag Dog. Party Clock
Come Visit Often – Running Out of Creative Juice, hitting road to find it
No More Hawaiian Punch Notebooks – writing first novel, at first 
Where You’re From – living in a campground/living in NYC
Time Isn’t After Us – making time for art at all costs 
Brooklyn & Alaska – Fishing in Alaska with Matt Nelson 
On The Beach – swimming and getting sunburnt 
Recording an Audio Book  – home recording my novel F250 to tape
Troll Dolls and Scarecrows – driving a forklift at a farm market
Spray Tans and Kingdom Hearts – working at GameStop with Elle Nash
TL;DR – the movie Adaptation and second drafts of a novel feel like hell 
Running and Walking – going for a run to forget your troubles, mowing lawns
Glossary of Terms – definitions of terms for a heavy construction site 
Turtle on a Rock – art is for everyone, to consume, to create 
Night Shift – working night shift in an oil refinery 
Sun Rise – when night shift ends at the oil refinery 
Talking with Scott McClanahan – all about Scott’s jobs 
Discount Office Furniture – one winter I delivered discount office furniture 
Lunch Truck – I usually write on my cellphone at lunch time
Welding and Writing – you start out in the dark and then you get used to it
Drug Test – getting high at work, causing problems 
Work Safe Or Die Trying – Hi my name is Bud, I work heavy construction in NJ