Bathroom Readers' Institute's Blog, page 40

The Great Nutella Heist of ’17

…and other big, brazen thefts of huge amounts of very specific foods.

The Nutella heist

Nutella—a mixture of ground hazelnuts, chocolate, and a lot of sugar—is peanut butter’s sassy European cousin. People on both sides of the Atlantic are wild about it, particularly in Western Europe, and they’ll apparently do anything to get more of it. In August 2017, someone in the German city of Neustadt made off with 20 tons of chocolate products made by the Ferrero Company, most of it Nutella, and worth more than $80,000. They didn’t just steal the Nutella and other chocolate goodies—they stole the refrigerated semi-truck trailer that was full of the products. Police were initially baffled, as someone would have needed to hook up their own big-rig truck in order to effectively tow away such a heavy payload. (Elsewhere in Germany, on the same weekend that the Nutella truck disappeared, a trailer full of 30 tons of fruit juice was stolen.)

Beans, beans…

Beans, beans, the musical fruit, the more you eat the more you…could be accessory to grand larceny. In October 2013, a truck driver in charge of a full load of Heinz Baked Beans, pulled over near the English town of Redditch to take a nap. As he slept, thieves cut a hole into the trailer and quietly made off with about two pallets full of beans. The $10,000 worth of the food the English put on toast for breakfast were recovered.

Muenster monster!

Beware the Muenster monster! In 2013, a truck driver drove right into the warehouse of a Wisconsin cheese company and presented all the proper paperwork for his pick-up: a load of about 42,000 pounds of Munster cheese. When it was all packed up, he drove off. Only later did the cheese company employees realize that there was no pre-existing purchase order for 42,000 pounds of Muenster…and a manhunt for the man who stole $200,000 worth of cheese was on. Before long, 34-year-old Veniamin Balik was arrested at a rest area in New Jersey…were he was attempting to sell off his cheesy cargo.

$1.2 million in fajitas

A man named Gilberto Escamilla worked for the juvenile justice department in Cameron County, Texas, and made more than $1.2 million in the process. How did a civil servant pull in all that dough? He ran an elaborate, long-in-the-works fajitas scheme. Escamilla used his government position to order large quantities of fajita meat (seasoned steak strips), which were delivered to his office, ostensibly to be served in a juvenile justice cafeteria. Instead, he’d send them out to his regular customers, who had no idea that the meat was hot. Escamilla got caught when he took a sick day, and his co-workers couldn’t make sense of an 800-pound fajitas delivery for a cafeteria with less than 100 inmates.­

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Act Now, This Offer Won’t Last…Just Like Ronco

It’s the end of an era for Ronco, an era they created. Ron Popeil’s company virtually invented the as-seen-on-TV product, sold via informercials. And in the process, they made millions…but that’s all in the past now.  As the company files for Chapter 11 bankruptcy , here’s a look back on some of the crazy gadgets Popeil peddled.

Pocket Fisherman

Resembling one of those extra-long butane lighters, the Pocket Fisherman was a retractable fishing rod, with no messy line or hooks to get caught on anything.

Mr. Microphone

This toy, first released in 1978, combined a microphone with a low-powered wireless radio transmitter. No speakers required: It worked by broadcasting the user’s voice over an FM radio as far as 100 feet away.

Sit-On Trash Compactor

In the 1970s, when “ecology” first hit home as an issue for many Americans, Popeil marketed this device that reduced household garbage…by crushing it. The Sit-On Trash Compactor was especially “green” in that it required no electricity—the user sat on a lowering platform that crushed trash.

GLH Formula #9

You’ll never go broke trying to sell a product that purports to treat hair loss and baldness. In the infomercials for this product (which aired in the early 1990s), Popeil used the product on his own substantial bald spot. What was GLH Formula #9? An aerosol-type can of colored, hair-thickening powder. In other words, hair spray paint. (“GLH” stood for “great looking hair.”)

Inside-the-Shell Electric Egg Scrambler

Popeil reportedly loathed scrambled eggs that hadn’t been properly mixed, leaving little bits of the white in with the yellow. That inspired him to invented this very specifically-minded gadget. The user placed a raw egg in the device’s bowl, where a needle would puncture it. Then, the object shook wildly, allowing the needle to mix up the egg. Then the user cracked it and put it in a pan—no mixing bowl required.

Showtime Rotisserie

Nowadays every grocery store in the country sells rotisserie-cooked chickens for about the same price as a whole raw chicken, eliminating the need for most people to own their own rotisserie. But in the late ‘80s and early ‘90s, Ronco’s Showtime Rotisserie Grill, a compact, table-top chicken cooker, became the company’s all-time bestselling product. The ads boasted the memorable catchphrase, “set it, and forget it!”

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The Big Book of Funtivity Downloadable

There’s never a dull moment when kids open up The Big Book of Funtivity. Loaded with all sorts of puzzles, brainteasers, jokes, weird facts, and more, this book will entertain and amuse kids for hours on end. Doodle and fill in the blanks of your own silly comic strips, perform cool science experiments with household objects, and learn fascinating facts about animals, history, science, and other subjects. Fun activities and kid-friendly humor will make this a hit with any youngster.

Take a sneak peek with these downloadable. Just in time for summer break!

Download Activities!












Buy the Book!

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Fast Food (Abomi)Nations!

Today is Eat What You Want Day…but your doctor would probably advise you to skip most of these fast-food gut-bombs anyway.

Sweet bird

There’s more than one way to bread and fry a chicken. You can dredge pieces in flour, or corn flakes, for example. Or, you could go to Popeye’s and have some sweet and savory chicken tenders coated in a breading made from shortbread cookie batter.

Never joke about meat 

In 2014, Arby’s ran ad showing off that it sold more than just its famous roast beef sandwiches. The commercial depicted a pile of all the meats available at the fast food chain, such as turkey, ham, corned beef, steak, brisket, chicken tenders, bacon, and roast beef (plus two kinds of cheese). People didn’t know the sandwich was a joke, and Arby’s received so many requests that it added an actual sandwich featuring all of its meats to its menu. It was called, appropriately enough, The Meat Mountain.

Hamburgers and hot dogs 

In the summer of 2015, Hardee’s didn’t think diners should have to choose between those summer-time grill favorites of hamburgers and hot dogs…so they combined them. The Most American Thickburger consisted of a half-pound of beef topped with the usual burger trimmings like lettuce, tomato, cheese, and onions…but also a hot dog sliced lengthwise and a handful of potato chips.

Extra cheese 

Some people don’t like a bunch of meats or vegetables on their pizza—a plain cheese pie is fine for them. Then there’s the Mac n’ Cheese Pizza from CiCi’s Pizza. It starts with a buttery crust, then a typical cheese blend on top…and then a few scoops of creamy macaroni and cheese.

It really popped

Don’t forget dessert! In 2013, Carl’s Jr. combined the super-sweet breakfast treat for people on the go…with a huge slab of ice cream. The Strawberry Pop Tart Ice Cream Sandwich was like a sandwich in that instead of bread it used Pop Tarts, and in between was a healthy portion of vanilla ice cream. This isn’t Carl’s Jr.’s only weird dessert sandwich. They also occasionally sell the Ice Cream Burger. It looks just like a hamburger, except the buns are cookies, the meat is chocolate ice cream, and the ketchup is a fruity topping.

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Diseases That Dogs Can Smell

Humans boast at least five senses. Dogs seem to have a few more—as evidenced by the fact that they can sense illness and medical conditions in humans before the humans have any idea.

Migraines 

According to a University of Pittsburgh study, dogs that live with people who suffer from migraines are able to notice subtle changes in their owners’ disposition that kick in when the severe headaches do. Amazingly, the dogs can sense that something is wrong up to two hours before the human demonstrates migraine symptoms. (One person in the study said that before she got the brunt of her migraine, her dog would bark, frantically wag its tail, and walk around in circles.)

Narcolepsy

Probably the most famous (and frightening) of all sleep disorders is narcolepsy. In severe cases, sufferers may fall asleep at random during the day, even if they got a good night’s rest the night before. It’s caused by the lack of hypocretin, a chemical in the brain that regulates awakeness and sleep.­ When a narcoleptic episode is about to strike, the body releases a nearly undetectable odor…undetectable by humans, that is. Researchers say that dogs can smell (and warn of) the onset of a bout of sudden sleepiness up to five minutes before their human can, which provides enough time for the person to get to a bed, pull over to the side of the road, or take emergency medication.

Diabetes

A telltale sign that a person has diabetes—or that a diagnosed diabetic needs to be hospitalized—is a condition called diabetic ketoacidosis. The body can’t make or use insulin to properly turn food into energy, and it starts breaking down fat instead, spilling a substance called ketones into the urine. It also reveals a slightly fruity or acidic scent in a person’s breath. People usually can’t smell their own breath, but dogs can…which is why some have been trained as assistants for diabetic patients. The dog can smell the ketoacidosis, and alert their human to it, before they pass out (or worse).

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No Socks Day!

Here’s are some facts about the one thing keeping your feet from the inside of your shoes—socks. (Today is actually “No Socks Day,” but still.)

Old Socks

The word sock comes from an Old English word socc, part of the language since about the year 1400. It means “light slipper,” and comes from the Latin soccus, a word Romans used to describe a light-weight, soft who with a low-heel. They got that word from a word Romans used to describe a light-weight, soft who with a low-heel. They got that word from sykkos, the Ancient Greek word for a thin foot-covering.

Socks with sandals? Sure!

The oldest socks ever found were discovered near the Nile River in Egypt, and date to sometime between the years 250 and 420 A.D. Even more interesting: They have split toes, meaning they were probably supposed to be worn with sandals, which were the style at the time. This means that when you or someone you love wears socks with sandals (Uncle John does this a lot), it isn’t dorky—it’s historically accurate!

Not so different

The words “sock” and “stocking” are pretty much interchangeable, but technically there is a difference between the two items of soft footwear. Traditionally, stockings are longer, and were worn up to the knees to cover the parts of the leg not covered by old-timey clothes like breeches or pantaloons. Socks, meanwhile, are shorter, reaching as high as mid-calf.

The origin of your socks

If you’re wearing a pair of mass-produced socks, we can tell you where they were probably manufactured. Various factories in the Datang district in eastern China, a.k.a. “Sock City” churn out eight billion pairs of socks every year. That accounts for a third of the world’s sock output.

They didn’t get far

It’s one of the oldest clichés—and stand-up comedy observations—in existence: How come you always seem to be missing a sock after you do laundry, and if so, where do those socks go? While the answer for most is probably “you lost a sock between the hamper and the laundry room” or “static cling,” there might be more nefarious forces afoot. A woman named Cathy Hinz manages a manufactured home committee. It’s like an apartment complex in that there’s a communal laundry room with big industrial washers and driers. In 2017, one of the washing machines wasn’t working right, and Hinz’s husband started to take it apart to see what was the problem. He removed the front bottom panel…revealing a secret chamber where all kinds of stuff had fallen out of clothes and stayed for years—change, credit cards…and dozens upon dozens of socks.

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How Long Would You Like to Be President?

Or rather, how long can a person be president of the United States? The answer is (probably) not what you think. We hope you enjoy this civics brainteaser.

What do Uncle John’s political feelings and free time have in common? The only political group he identifies with is the “Trivia Party,” (which he made up and is a perennial write-in candidate for president). Also, “Trivia Party” is what Uncle John holds every Friday night at BRI HQ. He likes to stay out of the political fray, but the one thing he does enjoy is presidential trivia, such as this little constitutional anomaly we recently came across.

How many years can a person legally serve as President of the United States?  

There is no minimum, of course, although it would be difficult (and likely tragic) if anybody ever topped William Henry Harrison, who served for just 31 days in 1841 after developing pneumonia at his own inauguration—he delivered a three-hour speech in the freezing cold and refused to wear an overcoat or a hat.

The maximum isn’t 12 years.

And the maximum isn’t 12 years, either. If you came up with that answer, you’re probably thinking of Franklin Delano Roosevelt, who was elected in 1932, began serving in 1933, and died in office in 1945. Roosevelt was elected to four straight terms, and he probably would have served the full 16 years those four terms would entail, except that he died in office in 1945, and Vice President Harry Truman filled out that term (before being re-elected in his own right).

22nd Amendment to the Constitution.

Also, 16 is not the most years someone can legally serve as president. After Roosevelt passed away and thereby left office, Congress shortly thereafter passed the 22nd Amendment to the Constitution, which set a presidential term limit. The amendment reads, “No person shall be elected to the office of the President more than twice, and no person who had held the office of President, or acted as President, for more than two years of a term to which some other person was elected President shall be elected to the office of President more than once.”

Approximately 10 years.

Translating that from political-ese, this means that the grand total, and the answer we’re looking for…is approximately 10 years. If a President leaves office for any reason, the Vice President assumes the job. Then, they are still eligible to run for the presidency two times if the president they replaced served less than half of the term for which they were elected.

A historical example.

Let’s use a historical example. President Richard Nixon resigned in August 1974—which was less than two years (or halfway) into the second term he won in 1972. His successor, Gerald Ford, ran for reelection in 1976. He lost to Jimmy Carter, but had Ford won, he could have run again in 1980, and if successful, he could have served until 1984, a hypothetical but totally constitutional period of about 10 years.

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From #1 NFL Draft Pick to…Something Else

In the 2018 NFL Draft, the Cleveland Browns selected Heisman Trophy-winning Oklahoma quarterback Baker Mayfield. Will he be like previous #1 picks like Peyton Manning and Troy Aikman and lead his team to Super Bowl glory…or will he be like these guys?

Ki-Jana Carter

If only Carter’s body had been willing to cooperate, he could have been a professional star running back on the level he was in college. In his final year at Penn State (1994), Carter was explosive, leading the team to a 12-0 record. In just one game against Michigan State, he rushed for 227 yards and scored five touchdowns. At regular season’s end, Carter was named an All-American, finished second in the Heisman Trophy vote, then played in the Rose Bowl, where he scored three touchdowns, including one that was the result of an 83-yard run. The Cincinnati Bengals grabbed Carter with the top pick in the 1995 draft and played for three other teams over the course of the next decade. But he barely played. He tore a ligament in a 1995 preseason game and missed the entirety of what would have been his rookie season; he missed the entire 1998 season due to a broken wrist; and then he missed the whole next season after he dislocated a kneecap. Carter went on to become a successful businessman, opening a sanitation company called Byoglobe.

Terry Baker

Baker played quarterback for Oregon State University, and won the Heisman Trophy in 1962—the first player from the West Coast to earn the award. That was just one of 15 various “player of the year” awards he won (including Sports Illustrated’s “Sportsman of the Year”), and he also graduated with a degree in mechanical engineering—no small feat. His last college play: a 99-yard touchdown run in the 1962 Liberty Bowl, which is still an NCAA record. Unsurprisingly, Baker was picked first in the 1963 draft by the Los Angeles Rams. He played three unexceptional seasons for that team, then played a year in the Canadian Football League. All the while, he was earning his law degree from USC. After four years as a pro football player, Baker retired to found the Portland, Oregon, law firm Tonkon Torp.

John Matuszak

Matuszak wasn’t exactly a bust in the NFL, but he’s much more famous for his life outside of football. A 6’8”, 280-pound defensive end, Matuszak was the star of the University of Tampa squad and was selected as the top pick in the 1973 draft by the Houston Oilers. He signed with the team, but also signed a team with the Houston Texans, crosstown rivals of the Oilers and members of the upstart and short-lived World Football League. He was served a restraining order during a game, as playing for two teams was a contract violation. The Oilers traded him away, and he wound up with the Raiders, winning one Super Bowl with the team when they were based in Oakland, and another in Los Angeles. He retired in 1982, and became an actor, appearing in Ringo Starr’s prehistoric comedy Cavemen and, under a lot of prosthetics, as misunderstood monster Sloth in the ‘80s classic The Goonies. (He also placed ninth in the World’s Strongest Man competition). Sadly, Matuszak died in 1989 at age 39 of an accidental painkiller overdose.

 

 

 

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Too-Weird-for-the-Movie Avengers, Assemble!

Avengers: Infinity War is filling up movie theaters around the country, irresistible to audiences for how it assembles literally dozens of well-known superheroes from Marvel’s “Avengers” team, including Captain America, the Incredible Hulk, Dr. Strange…but definitely not these characters from old Avengers comic books.

Big Bertha

Ashley Crawford is another member of the Great Lakes Avenger…well, when she’s not modeling, that is. When she’s on the clock to fight crime, she transforms into Big Bertha, who has the ability to instantly make herself extremely overweight. In order to turn from Big Bertha back into Ashley Crawford, the character continuously vomits until she’s at her “regular” size. (Really.)

Wheels Wolinksi

As part of a group called “The Wolfpack,” Wheels stared out fighting street crime in his home neighborhood of the South Bronx. He also has excellent mechanical abilities and uses a wheelchair for reasons never made clear…but which is the source of his slightly politically incorrect nickname.

Doorman

Marvel Comics has maintained a sub-group of the Avengers called the Great Lakes Avengers—they literally fight crime in the upper Midwest out of their Milwaukee home base. One of its members is Doorman, whose main power is the ability to open the “Darkforce Dimension.” Sound amazing? Well, all he can really do with it is to create doorways wherever he wants, allowing the teleportation of people from, more or less, one side of a building to another.

Dazzler

Officially added to the Avengers later on, Dazzler was created in 1980, when disco record label Casablanca asked Marvel to create a comic book about a disco singer. Plans to release disco music attributed to “Dazzler” fell through because by the time the comic launched, disco was dead. The character is a law school student who drops out to become a singer…who can use her powers to transform sound into pure energy.

Jack of Hearts

This superhero’s “real” name is Jack Hart, which inspired his heart-covered costume that makes him look like a playing card. His special powers came to him as a child, when his father, a scientist, accidentally covered the boy in a mysterious substance called “Zero Fluid.”

Flatman

He can make his body really flat, which makes him impervious to injury, able to slip under doors, and, if viewed at a certain angle (like if he’s pressed up against a wall), invisible. He can also take the form of any animal…in that he can fold his flat self into the shape or an origami-type animal.

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Sports Come to Sin City (Eventually)

Las Vegas is one of the biggest cities in America, but it only recently got its first major pro sports team—the Vegas Golden Knights of the NHL. (They won their division and are cruising through the playoffs in their first season—unprecedented for an expansion team.) Sports in Vegas were a long time coming—here are some near misses.

Las Vegas Kings

The Sacramento Kings are one of the most relocated teams in sports history. The team has played in Rochester, New York; Cincinnati; Kansas City, Missouri; and Omaha, Nebraska. In 1998, the wealthy Maloof family bought the team, adding to its portfolio of businesses, which also multiple Las Vegas hotel-casinos. For almost as long as the Maloofs owned the team, there was speculation they’ve move it, which reached a fever pitch after the Maloofs convinced the NBA to host its 2007 all-star game in Las Vegas. Just before the move could be made, the Maloofs sold the team, and the new owners kept the Kings in California.

Las Vegas Expos

By 2004, it was clear that the Montreal Expos of Major League Baseball needed a change. The team was losing lots of money, and moving was the best option. Eventually the league itself took over ownership and move the Expos to Washington, D.C., where they became the Washington Nationals. The national capital just barely edged out Las Vegas, which lobbied MLB officials hard. Baseball executives were wined and dined with fancy steakhouse dinners, a Celine Dion concert, and hotel rooms at the Bellagio. Local investors also showed off the site of a planned stadium. What happened? The investment group lost their funding…and that stadium was never built.

Las Vegas Marlins

That same year, the Florida Marlins threatened to move out of Miami unless they got a brand-new, taxpayer-funded stadium. The team called the city’s bluff and met with Las Vegas mayor Oscar Goodman about relocation. Eventually, Miami-Dade County and the city of Miami agreed to split the cost of a new Marlins field.

A different Las Vegas hockey team

The NHL began play in Las Vegas last fall, but it’s not the first attempt to have a hockey team in the desert metropolis. In 2007, an ownership group (which included Transformers director Jerry Bruckheimer) tried and failed to put a team in the city.

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