Bathroom Readers' Institute's Blog, page 120

5 Fast Facts About the New England Patriots

Get ready for this weekend’s AFC Championship game with some facts on one of the contenders. Here is some interesting New England Patriots trivia to prepare you.

The team was a charter member of the American Football League (later merged into the NFL) in 1960 and was known as the Boston Patriots. When it joined the NFL a decade later, it began play in Foxborough, Massachusetts, which is 21 miles from Boston and 20 from Providence, Rhode Island. Now a regional team, the team became the Bay State Patriots for a month, and then the New England Patriots.


The Patriots played in the first ever AFL preseason exhibition game, as well as the first AFL regular season game. On July 30, 1960, they defeated the Buffalo Bills in the former, and on Sept. 9, 1960, lost to the Denver Broncos in the latter.


There have been lots of draft busts in NFL history—college standouts picked high that falter in the pros. Longtime Patriots quarterback Tom Brady is probably the biggest opposite-of-a-draft-bust. He was selected #199th overall in the 2000 NFL Draft. He became the Patriots’ fourth-string quarterback, but in 2001, after injuries and a lackluster start by Bledsoe, Brady got his chance to shine. He became one of the most successful NFL stars ever, leading the Patriots to three Super Bowl victories. (He’s also one of only five QBs to ever…host Saturday Night Live.)


Head coach Bill Belichick is so closely associated with the Patriots that it’s hard to imagine him coaching anywhere else. But he’s been coaching in the pros since the 1970s, as an assistant or special teams coach for the Colts, Lions, Broncos, Giants, Browns, and Jets. He was promoted from defensive backs coach to head coach of the New York Jets in 1999. Belichick was then offered the head coaching job in New England, which he accepted. Time Belichick was head coach of the Jets: one day. He’s currently the longest-tenured coach in the NFL.


When veteran all-star safety Adrian Wilson joined the Patriots in 2013, he wanted to use #24 on his jersey, as he had done for all of his 12-year professional career. However, that number was already taken by cornerback Kyle Arrington. So Wilson made him a deal: If Arrington let him have #24, he’d buy Arrington, the father of a new baby, a year’s supply of diapers. Arrington agreed and sure enough, a few days later a truckload of diapers arrived at his home. (He took on the #25, by the way.)

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The Changing Categories of the Academy Awards

Oscar nominations were announced today. Here’s a look at how some of the categories have evolved over time.

Production Design

An Oscar for Best Production Design has been awarded since 2012. The award is given to both a film’s art director as well as its set decorator, as both departments combine to create the physical look of a film (not including costumes). Prior to 2012, the award was called Best Art Direction, but was changed when the Art Directors branch of the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences renamed itself the Designers branch. (In the early years of film, separate awards were given out in the category to color and black-and-white productions.)

Best Picture

The most prestigious award has had a lot of different names. Since 1962, it’s been, simply “Best Picture.” From 1941 to 1961, it was once Outstanding Motion Picture, and then Best Motion Picture.

Best Director

At the first Academy Awards in 1928, two direction awards were given: one for Dramatic Direction and one for Comedic Direction. The categories were combined in the next year, and ever since, with Best Director recognizing the best achievements in directing regardless of film genre. (However, comedy directors have won less than a dozen times. The most recent: Michel Hazanavicius for The Artist in 2012.)

Best Original Musical

Many Oscar categories have been discontinued over the years, and for good reason (such as the silent-era “Best Title Writing”) and it would seem like this one has been eliminated, too, because it hasn’t been awarded since 1984. But it’s technically still viable; there just aren’t enough musicals released each year for it to be a viable, competitive award. Awarded to the score writers, stage-score adapters, and songwriters, the last winner was Prince, for Purple Rain, beating The Muppets Take Manhattan and Kris Kristofferson’s Songwriter. Past winners include All That Jazz, Cabaret, Fiddler on the Roof, and West Side Story.

Want more? Here is some additional facts about the Oscars.

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Politicians vs. The Fourth Estate

Here are a few American politicians that recently tangled with the press…and what happened afterward.

Anthony Weiner vs. Lucy Watson

This Democrat famously ran one of the most disastrous campaigns for mayor in the history of New York City in 2013. In addition to dealing with accusations that abused members of his staff and had over $2,000 in unpaid traffic tickets, Weiner found himself embroiled in a “sexting” scandal that drew international headlines. Strangest of all, perhaps, was Weiner’s encounter with Lucy Watson, a British TV reporter. He mocked her accent while on camera and said that he felt like he had “walked into a Monty Python bit.” Then he poked fun at the U.K.’s notoriously rainy weather. Weiner did not win the election.

Michael Grimm vs. Mike Scotto

The Republican congressman was feeling a bit grumpy after the 2014 State of the Union address when When Mike Scotto, a reporter for NY1, made the mistake of asking Grimm some questions about his campaign finances. The congressman threatened to toss the reporter off a balcony before saying, “I will break you in half. Like a boy.” Grimm called Scotto the next day and apologized for the threat before issuing a second written apology that criticized the reporter for asking off-topic. The incident received lots of attention from the press but Scotto accepted his apology. In 2015, Grimm resigned in disgrace after pleading guilty to tax evasion.

Kirby Delauter vs. Bethany Rodgers

This Republican politician from Frederick County, Maryland received lots of unwanted attention from the press recently when he threatened to sue Bethany Rodgers, a reporter from The Frederick News-Post. Why? Because she printed his name in an unflattering article about parking spots set aside for him and his fellow council members. Delauter claimed he would sue her and the paper if they ever printed his name again without his permission. The paper shot back with a funny editorial titled Kirby Delauter, Kirby Delauter, Kirby Delauter that informed the politican of its basic First Amendment rights.

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Interesting Trivia About the NFL Playoffs

Paint your face in your team colors and huddle up for these bits of interesting trivia.

It’s simple to get into the NFL playoffs: win the most games, right? Not exactly. The playoffs are structured so that six teams from each conference get spots: four division winners and the two additional “wild card” teams with the best records. Somebody has to win a division, even if the division is terrible. The Carolina Panthers won the NFC South this year with a 7-8-1 record. That’s worse than the Philadelphia Eagles (10-6) and San Francisco 49ers (8-8), who missed out on wild card slots.


The only other time a team with a losing record made the playoffs was in 1982. That season, a strike reduced the season to just 9 games. The Detroit Lions and Cleveland Browns both earned wild card playoff spots, both with a record of 4-5. (Both lost in the first round.)


Teams with the longest playoff streaks: From 1975 to 1983, nine seasons, the Dallas Cowboys were a postseason mainstay. The Indianapolis Colts also made the playoffs nine seasons in a row from 2002 to 2010. (Each went on to win the Super Bowl once during those streaks.) The longest current streak is six seasons, shared by the New England Patriots and Green Bay Packers.


The team with the longest playoff drought: the Buffalo Bills. It’s been 15 years since the team appeared in the postseason, losing a first-round game to the Tennessee Titans.


Every team in the NFC has been to the conference title game. The only NFC team to never win that conference title game is the Detroit Lions.


The only team in the NFL to never appear in a conference title match is the AFC’s Houston Texans. (But to be fair, they’ve only been in existence since 2002.)


One team has reached both the NFC title game and the AFC title game. It’s the Seattle Seahawks. From its inception in 1977 until 2001, the team played in the AFC, then switched to the NFC. In 1983, the Seahawks lost the AFC title match; it won NFC titles in 2006 and 2014.

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The Springfield Nuclear Power Planet Softball Team and the Baseball Hall of Fame

On a 1992 episode of The Simpsons, Mr. Burns hires nine then-current Major League Baseball stars to be ringers on the company softball team, only to have nearly all be unable to play for various, bizarre reasons. With Baseball Hall of Fame inductees being announced this month, here’s a look at what happened to those players in real life (all of whom voiced their animated selves).

Don Mattingly (first base)

Coach Mr. Burns demands a clean-cut team, and he demands Mattingly shave off his sideburns. Mattingly keeps shaving his head, to no avail. Nearly bald, he’s angrily kicked off the team by Burns, screaming at him to shave off his sideburns.

Hall of Fame: The 2015 election marked Mattingly’s 15th year on the ballot. According to old Hall of Fame rules, players are eliminated from future consideration if they don’t get in during their first 15 attempts. Mattingly got 9.1 percent, way below the 75 percent threshold of votes needed for induction. (Should’ve shaved those sideburns, Mattingly.)

Steve Sax (second base)

Springfield police arrest Sax and send him to prison, framing him for a number of unsolved crimes.

Hall of Fame: On his first appearance on the ballot in 2000, Sax earned just 0.4 percent of the vote. 5 percent or more is required to reappear in subsequent years, so Sax never made the ballot again. (Sax was Simpsons’ writers second choice for second base. They asked Cubs star—and now Hall of Famer—Ryne Sandberg, but he turned down the offer.)

Wade Boggs (third base)

At Moe’s Tavern one night, Boggs gets in a drunken fight with Barney over who was the best English prime minister. Boggs argued for William Pitt the Elder; Barney held firm to Lord Palmerston. And then he knocked Wade Boggs out.

Hall of Fame: Boggs made it into the Hall in 2005, the first year he was eligible, with 91.5 percent of the vote.

Ozzie Smith (shortstop)

Smith visits the Springfield Mystery Spot, which isn’t a tacky tourist attraction or gravitational anomaly, but some kind of vortex…where he becomes lost forever.

Hall of Fame: Smith was a first-ballot inductee in 2002.

Jose Canseco (left field)

Canseco never shows up to the big softball game because he comes upon a house fire and saves a baby, then her cat, then her player piano, her appliances…

Hall of Fame: More famous for admitting to steroid use, appearing on reality shows, and, most recently, for severing a finger while cleaning a gun, Canseco’s slugger days have been overshadowed. On his first year on the Hall of Fame ballot in 2007, Canseco got 1.1 percent, and was dropped from future consideration.

Ken Griffey, Jr. (center field)

Griffey gets addicted to nerve tonic, which gives him a giant head—literally.

Hall of Fame: He retired in 2011, and will be eligible for induction next year. He’s expected to be a near-unanimous first ballot pick.

Darryl Strawberry (right field)

Of the nine ringers, eight are unable to play. Only Strawberry shows up, and he plays the same position as Homer Simpson.

Hall of Fame: In his first year of eligibility in 2005, Strawberry got 1.1 percent of the vote and was dropped from future ballots.

Mike Scioscia (catcher)

Although he’s a ringer, Scioscia decides to actually work at the Springfield Nuclear Power Plant. After a few days, he’s deathly ill with radiation poisoning. (Despite the character’s enthusiasm, Scioscia was writers’ second choice, after Cartlon Fisk said no.)

Hall of Fame: Scioscia retired in 1992, the same year this Simpsons episode aired. Eligible for the Hall in 1998, he didn’t make it onto the ballot. (But in 2002 he won a World Series as the manager of the Anaheim Angels.)

Roger Clemens (pitcher)

Clemens attends a show by a mentalist, and is hypnotized into thinking he’s a chicken. The spell can’t be broken.

Hall of Fame: Like Canseco, Clemens’ illustrious career has been tainted by links to performance enhancing substances. Clemens keeps showing up on the Hall of Fame ballot, though, but can’t quite make it in. This

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The Elvis Movie Generator

From 1956 to 1969, Elvis Presley (who would’ve turned 80 years today) made more than 30 movies, such as Roustabout, Girls! Girls! Girls! and Harum Scarum. They were low budget and formulaic: some songs, a pretty girl, a chase scene, and a fight. With our handy generator, you can make up your very own Elvis movie.

 1. PICK A NAME FOR ELVIS’S CHARACTER

It should be something masculine, preferably one syllable.

Real examples: Clint, Vince, Chad, Rick, Jess, Deke, Josh

Or it can be playful and boyish, usually ending with the letter “y.”

Real examples: Jimmy, Johnny, Toby, Danny, Rusty, Lucky

 

2. PICK A PROFESSION FOR ELVIS’S CHARACTER

He always has a job that requires lifting, throwing, and/or sweating. Extra points if it’s dangerous or mildly threatening.

Real examples: boxer, helicopter pilot, gambler, rodeo cowboy, lifeguard, crop duster, waterskiing instructor, tour guide, soldier, racecar driver, pro bono doctor, Navy frogman, handyman

Or it can be something a little more believable for Elvis.

Real examples: rock ’n’ roll singer, traveling singer, nightclub singer,

coffeehouse singer, jazz singer, riverboat singer

 

3. PICK A FUN-LOVING AND WHIMSICAL TITLE

A good title should contain one or more of the following: “Girls,” “Love,” “Rock,” a city or state, an article of women’s clothing, a nonsense word, two words that rhyme, or an exclamation point. Some examples we made up:

So Many Girls So Little Time, What a Night!, That Darn Girl, Gals-a-Poppin!, Wackity Schmackity, Howdy Denver!, Drive Faster!, What’s a Feller to Do?, Too Many Bikinis, Say Hey, Once Upon a Time in the Islands, Aloha Mexico

 

4. CREATE A PLOT BY FILLING IN THESE BLANKS

In (title of the movie), Elvis plays (character’s name), a (character’s profession) who needs to raise $5,000 by the end of the week to (get into the big race, stay out of jail, buy his airplane back, fix his motorcycle, etc.). Will he do it in time? And will he win the heart of (Judy, Valerie, Cathy, Lily, etc.) in the process?

Here are a few we came up with:

In Stockholm Stockings , Elvis plays Dash, a lobster fisherman who needs to raise $5,000 by the end of the week in order to buy back his father’s scuba business. Will he do it in time? And will he win the heart of Betty, the waitress in the local pie shop, in the process?


In Racin’ , Elvis plays Johnny, a motorcycle racer who needs to raise $5,000 by the end of the week in order to get enough money for the race entry fee. Will he do it in time? And will he win the heart of Sheree, the sheriff’s daughter, in the process?


In Turnpike , Elvis plays Lance, a singing truck driver who needs to raise $5,000 by the end of the week in order to buy a pony for the kids at the orphanage. Will he do it in time? And will he win the heart of Margie, the lady doctor who works in the orphanage, in the process?

For more music fun, check out Uncle John’s Bathroom Reader Plunges into Music.

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7 Random Facts About the North Pole

Just because Christmas is over doesn’t mean Santa Claus’ native land fades into non-existence. Do you know these random facts, or frosty factoids if you will, about what really goes on at the top of the globe?

There are actually two North Poles. The first is the Geographic North Pole, which is, literally, the topmost point of the planet. The other is the North Magnetic Pole, which moves around on a daily basis depending on what’s happening with the earth’s magnetic field.


There is no land beneath either of the two North Poles. All you’ll find are sheets of ice over bodies of incredibly cold water.


The North Pole doesn’t technically belong to any nation, but Denmark is making a play for it. The U.S., Norway, Russia, and Canada, would all like to claim at least a portion of the Arctic Circle. Why? Geological surveys indicate that 22 percent of the world’s untapped oil and natural gas are waiting underneath all of that ice. Global warming might also free up many lucrative shipping routes in the Arctic.


There are many North Pole-themed amusement parks in the world but Santa Claus Village is the only one that’s located within the Arctic Circle. It can be found a few miles north of Rovaniemi, a city in the frosty Lapland region of Finland. The Arctic Circle’s borderline cuts right through the park and there’s even a white line painted across it to let guests know when they’re inside the circle. In addition to restaurants and other Christmas-centric attractions, they can mail postcards stamped with a special Santa Claus postmark.


Average temperatures in January fluctuate between –45 degrees and –15 degrees Fahrenheit. Temperatures during the summer months usually hover around freezing. The highest temp ever recorded at the North Pole? A comparatively balmy 41 degrees Fahrenheit.


The narwhal lives in the waters around the Arctic Circle. Each of these whales has a tusk between six and ten feet long, earning them the nickname “Unicorns of the Sea.” Back in the 16th century, their “horns” were highly coveted and were said to contain magical curative powers. Supposedly, Queen Elizabeth I paid 10,000 pounds for one.


There’s a North Pole marathon. After being transported to an international North Pole Camp via helicopters, runners dash along the floating Arctic ice shelf braving temperatures of –22 degrees F, accounting for wind chill. Want to participate? The next one is in April 2014, and the entry fee will set you back just $14,800, but that does include a T-shirt and a medal, but only if you finish.

 

 

 

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6 Weird January Holidays You Ought to Celebrate

Make it your New Years resolution to observe more ridiculous made-up holidays.

Jan. 2: Run it Up the Flagpole and See If Anyone Salutes Day

The vaguely crude expression “run it up the flagpole and see what sticks” is another way of saying “throw an idea out there and see what people think.” It’s reportedly most commonly used in the advertising and newspaper industries (or at least it was 50 years ago), and is akin to “throw it against the wall and see what sticks.” This holiday, right at the beginning of a new year full of new beginnings, is your excuse to try something new…just to see what happens.

Jan. 3: Fruitcake Toss Day

Do you still receive the traditional—and traditionally, comically awful—holiday gift of a nasty, stale fruitcake? Today is the day to toss it. Adherents of the holiday say you can toss it in the garbage, or take it out to a field with some friends and see who can “toss” it the longest distance.

Jan. 4: Trivia Day

Here’s a fun trivia fact: This is Uncle John’s most favorite holiday and “most important day in the history of days.” Celebrate by sharing interesting facts with your friends, all easily procured from books such as, oh, we don’t know…

Jan. 6: Bean Day

A day honoring the common legume, often disrespected for its relation to flatulence, rarely celebrated for its dietary completeness—they’re high in fiber, and low in fat. A woman named Paula Bowen founded the holiday to honor her father, a pinto bean farmer. (She’s also a fan of the classic British comic character Mr. Bean.)

Jan. 18: Thesaurus Day

Peter Roget, author of Roget’s Thesaurus, was born on January 18, 1779, and this holiday is in the honor of the man who create the reference book of synonyms for students and writers looking for a better word—or rather one’s that preferable, superior, finer, higher quality, worthier…

Jan. 24: Talk Like a Grizzled Prospector Day

Sept. 19 is famously “Talk Like a Pirate Day,” but it’s just as much fun to talk like a guy named Geech or Pappy. A Facebook group started this holiday to commemorate the day in 1848 in which gold was discovered in California. Now get it to it, ya dadburn hornswaggler!

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Fake-or-Fact Friday: Fabulous Freakouts Edition

Here are some stories of people getting very mad in public. Fortunately, only two of them are real. One of them we made up. Can you guess which one? The answer is at the end of the post.

A.

In December, a Korean Air flight to Incheon, South Korea, at New York’s JFK airport was on the tarmac and ready to depart when a first-class passenger started screaming at a flight attendant. The passenger, an executive with the airline, demanded the flight attendant be removed from the flight, which required the plane to head back to the gate. This delayed the flight by over 20 minutes. What was the flight attendant’s gaffe? She served the executive her complimentary nuts in a bag, instead of on a plate.

B.

A Harvard Business School professor ordered some food from a Chinese restaurant and bar in Brookline, Massachusetts. He paid and left…only to discover later that he was overcharged by $4. Did the professor return to the restaurant, explain the mistake, and get his four bucks back? No. He submitted a complaint on the restaurant’s website (breaking down all the charges), and the restaurant explained that its online prices hadn’t been altered to reflect a recent price hike. That’s when the professor threatened to report the restaurant to the authorities for what he said amounted to poor business practices and fraud.

C.

A man went to a Seattle area Kohl’s department store on Black Friday at 5 a.m. to pick up a Christmas gift for his wife: a simple, 18K gold chain on sale for an advertised price $50. He had to wait in line to get into the store, and by the time he was allowed in after prior customers at 5:45, none of the gold chains were available. Staff were accommodating and offered to honor the $50 price on a 14K gold-plated chain…with a diamond pendant. The store charged $300 for that, but the man said no, walked out of the store, and brought police to arrested the store’s manager for “bait and switch.” Instead, the man was arrested for wasting the police’s time.

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Want more things that sound true…but aren’t? Then check out Uncle John’s Fake Facts. (Really!)

 

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Junk Food Items That Disappeared…And Returned

We are living in a golden age of discontinued junk food returning to stores due to popular demand.

The Yumbo

There are many fast food options today, but in the 1960s there weren’t many on-the-go options besides hamburgers. Burger King tried to attract customers not interested in red meat with the Yumbo, a ham and cheese sandwich. The simple sandwich with a silly name debuted in 1968, was never that popular, and was discontinued in 1974. It’s now back on the menu at Burger King, complete with a ‘70s-themed nostalgic ad campaign. The company claims that it’s one of their most requested axed items.

French Toast Crunch

In 1995, General Mills debuted a “spinoff” of Cinnamon Toast Crunch, one its most popular breakfast cereals ever: French Toast Crunch. The pieces at first were styled to look like tiny pieces of eggy bread, but that was phased out in favor of ridged squares with cinnamon and sugar, in other words almost identical to Cinnamon Toast Crunch. The inability to tell them apart is probably why sales slumped…and General Mills took the cereal off the market in 2006. Almost immediately, online campaigns sprung up to “Bring Back French Toast Crunch.” In 2014, General Mills obliged. It will hit stores in early 2015 (although it never went away…in Canada).

Surge

Introduced in 1996, Surge was Coca-Cola’s answer to Pepsi’s popular Mountain Dew: a sugar and caffeine laden citrus-flavored soda. (In fact, the internal company code name for Surge was MDK, or “Mountain Dew Killer.”) As Mountain Dew was advertised with images of people performing extreme sports, Coca-Cola did the same thing with Surge, positioning it as an “edgy alternative.” How edgy was it? It reportedly tasted a lot like Mello Yello, a previous Coke attempt to steal away customers from Mountain Dew. Sales never took off, and by 2003 Surge was gone. Guess what? An online campaign prompted Coca-Cola to revive Surge. The company sells it exclusively online as a niche product so as not to compete with Mountain Dew, which has had an increase in sales in the past decade.

Discover more food and drink trivia.

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