Morgan L. Busse's Blog, page 17

The Heartache of Saying Good Bye

I had to put my dog down a couple weeks ago. It was one of the hardest things I have ever done. To own an animal is to have a small piece of your heart wrapped inside a furry creature. And when they die, that piece of your heart goes with them.

I’ve had Rory (my dachshund) for ten years. She’s been through everything with me: all our moves, the births of three of my children, the ups and downs in life. Apart from God and my husband, she has been the only constant thing I’ve had. She loved to sit on the couch with me when I wrote or watched TV. And when I wasn’t on the couch, she would sit on her over sized pet bed and keep watch over our family.

A couple years ago, she developed a skin condition that made her lose her hair and smell really bad. We took her to multiple vets, but no one knew what was wrong with her. We could either pay hundreds of dollars and have extensive testing done, or just wash her every week with a special shampoo. Since we didn’t have hundreds of dollars in our bank account, I chose the shampoo. Every week for the last three years I have bathed Rory, scrubbing the dead skin away and conditioning her poor irritated body. It wasn’t fun, but it was my way of showing love for her.

This fall, she began to have problems with going to the bathroom in the house. I thought it was because I wasn’t letting her out fast enough and tried to be more diligent. Then on my birthday, she went to the bathroom in front of me (something she would never have done, she was such a proper little dog and always went outside). It was then I realized she couldn’t control herself anymore. Since we live in a rental house, she couldn’t stay inside any longer. With tears, I went and made a place for her to live in the garage.

As the month passed, she went downhill. Her skin condition became really bad, she was disoriented half the time, and she could hardly move. I then had to make one of the hardest decisions so far in my life: to let her live this way until she was in a lot of pain, or to let her go.

For a week I battled the decision. I couldn’t put my dog down. It hurt too much to think about her being gone. But I also knew to let her live like this was selfish on my part. It was time to let my friend go.

I sat outside and watched my dog sunbath in the driveway. She could barely move by then. Instead, she just sat there and enjoyed the sun. Autumn leaves fluttered across our lawn and God spoke to me. Not in an audible way, but in a quiet, soul touching way. The leaves made me think of seasons. Life is seasons: youth and life, hard work adulthood, then the twilight years when the leaves fall from the trees and the world prepares to rest. God watches over all the seasons, His hand is a part of each one. And when fall comes, He is there to gently bring to life to rest.

There is nothing to fear in death, although death itself is the antithesis of life. God has power even over death; nothing escapes His gentle hands. And so I knew that He would hold Rory and carry her over to the other side. What happens to animals when they die? I don’t know. But I do know God, and He is love. He loves all of his creation. He will do what is best for it.

Rory is gone now. I cried when that day came, and still cry. It means I have a heart, and part of it is gone. I like to think she is running through a field of green grass with that kind of hop and jump a dachshund has when they run. But wherever she is, she is with God now, free of the groans of creation. And there is no better place to be than in the hands of God.

 

Running into Battle Half Naked

Every few months, I hit a week (or two) where every bad thing you can think of happens. Example: not too long ago I had to say good-bye to my dog and put her down for health reasons, got stuck in a foot of mud on a deserted Kansas road at night with no way out, had two kids sick with the stomach bug, and one kid end up in the ER (all within one week).

Normally when this kind of storm hits my life, I do great for about a day or two, then I crash. I fall on my knees and cry. I usually feel guilty because I’m a long-time Christian and a pastor’s wife so I should I be able to handle this kind of craziness, right? Wrong.

After a while, I get back up and get going again until the next storm hits me. Then I crash and the cycle starts again.

It wasn’t until a month ago that I realized something: All these years I have been running into battle half naked.

Say what?

God brought it to my attention that I was trying to coast through life. The problem is, you can’t coast through battles. When you only have half of your armor on, the enemy can pin you down then chop you off at the knee. That’s exactly how I felt after each storm.

I had forgotten that it takes the full armor of God to stand. I was trying to plunge through life with just a belt and breastplate on, and failing miserably.

So I went back to Ephesians 6 and here is what I discovered:

1) Before you put any spiritual armor on, you need to be standing firm in God’s strength. Ouch. I was definitely trying to shoulder my way through the hard things instead of being strong in God first.

2) Put on all of God’s armor. Not just the belt of truth. Not just the breastplate of righteousness. All of it. Half of it will only protect half of you.

3) All of the pieces of armor are important. There was a point a couple months ago where things were so bad I was actually questioning my own salvation because I was so sinful inside. As I was reading Ephesians 6, the helmet of salvation suddenly made sense. I really never understood that piece. Yeah, yeah, I’m saved, who cares. But after coming through that time of doubt, I realized that I had not been protecting my head. Without my helmet in place, my mind was susceptible. But with my helmet on, I know who I am and who I belong to and there is nothing that take that away. That knowledge gave me my confidence back.

4) Our battle is not with flesh and blood. Although sometimes it feels like it, especially when there is a person in your life who seems intent on cutting you down.

5) Pray at all times. All right, let’s be honest here, who prays all the time? Come on, raise your hand. Anyone? Yeah, I don’t either. Instead, I try and coast along and only bring the big items to God. But Paul says we need to pray all the time and for each other. I am not the only one in this battle. You are too. And so is my husband. And my children. And my fellow believers. We all need prayer.

Everyday for the last month I have been reading Ephesians 6 and putting my armor on. When this last storm hit, I was ready. I had my shield of faith ready when the doubts came. I had my helmet on. I used God’s word to counter the attacks. And I prayed, not only for myself, but for my brothers and sisters everywhere.

I’ve read Ephesians 6 countless times over the last twenty years, but only recently do I feel I’ve come to understand the importance of this passage.

How about you? Have you been running into the battles of life half naked? Did you leave your shield at home? Are you trying to stand on your own strength? What are you missing?

 

A Tale of a Black Cat

This tale began on a warm, summer day in June. Every day my children and I would bike along a path near our home. On that particular day as we were riding by a patch of woods, I heard the strangest sound: a mixture of mewling and crying. I stopped and listened. There it was again, one of the most pathetic sounds I had ever heard. So I called to the kids, parked my bike, and headed toward the trees.

After pushing back some branches, I found a scrawny black kitten looking up at me. He cried again, his eyes wide. At first he stepped toward me, then away from me. It was as if he didn’t know if he could trust me or not. My heart just melted. I couldn’t ride off and pretend I never saw him. By the looks of things, he didn’t have much life left. Only enough to call for help.

I reached in to grab him. He must have decided I was trustworthy because he came toward me and let me pick him up. I wasn’t sure what I was going to do with him. My husband had said no more pets after I brought home our last stray cat. But I simply could not leave this little black kitten here to die. So I came up with a plan. I would only keep the kitten temporarily, long enough to find him a forever home.

And with that, I called to the kids again and started biking home, the black kitten perched on my shoulder like a parrot from some pirate story.

At home, I dug out my other cat’s food and poured it into a bowl. The black kitten inhaled the food, never stopping to even chew. After a couple minutes, he found me and crawled into my lap. He watched me and I watched him. Then he reached up and placed his paws on either side of my neck. He was hugging me! All I could think was, “Bud, you can’t stay with me.”

Dan came home later and we talked. He knew my tender heart toward strays and agreed to let me find a permanent home for the kitten. So started a month long process of searching. Nothing happened. In the meantime, Vader, as we now called him, had started worming his way into our hearts.

As the month ended, I knew I was going to have to take the kitten to the pound. But then that weekend we had three people interested in Vader. My heart was torn. I saw how much my family, especially my husband (although he would never admit it) had grown attached to Vader. But we already had five animals. We couldn’t take in another.

Then everything fell through. The family found another kitten that fit their family’s needs. And I had made an agreement in my heart to honor what my husband had asked me, to find another place for Vader to live. So with a heavy heart, I text my husband and told him Vader did not have a home and I was ready to take him to the pound. My husband text me back and said Vader already had a home. We would be his forever home.

That is how we came to adopt a sweet, black kitty named Vader. He is one of the most loving, playful cats I have ever met. Sometimes I think there is a bit of dog in that cat. And although he loves all of us, it is my husband who holds a special place in that cat’s heart.

I love stories about stray animals. I think in some ways they represent us. We were once lost, but then were found, taken home, washed up, fed, maybe bandaged, and given a forever home with the King of kings.

How about you? Have you ever adopted a stray? Please, share your story!

 

Vader loves playing with
toilet paper!

 

Fantasy and Science Fiction Reads

During the month of October I have been celebrating anything and everything speculative. And it wouldn’t be complete without sharing some of my favorite books or books I am looking forward to reading. So if you are looking for a nice, cozy book to curl up with this winter, check out some of my suggestions

Fantasy:

The Ryn by Serena Chase. The story is your typical young person finds out they are royalty, but I love how Serena puts a unique twist on this by giving Rose (who later finds out she is the Ryn, the future savior of her people) the ability to hear other people’s thoughts. That and Rose has red hair (I love red hair!). To read my complete review of The Ryn, click here. To find out more about The Ryn, click here.

 

 

The Blood of the Kings series by Jill Williamson. Another fantasy with people who can hear minds. This three book series is a two time Christy awarding series (along with multiple other awards) and just plain good. To find out more about In Darkness Hid (the first book) click here.

 

 

 

And of course, my own fantasy series. The Follower of the Word series centers around Rowen, a young woman who discovers a mark on her hand, a mark that allows her to see inside the human soul. There are those who are terrified of her power, and so banish her. And then there are those who wish to possess that power and search all the Lands for Rowen, the last Truthsayer. To find out more about the first book in the series, Daughter of Light, click here.

 

 

Steampunk:

I love steampunk: the gadgets, the historical flavor, the meshing of fantasy and technology. So of course I need to add some steampunks to my list!

Crosswind by Steve Rzasa. The Stark brothers live in a western steampunk world filled with aeroplanes and trains, and lots of adventure! Click here to find out more.

 

 

 

Armored Hearts by Pauline Creeden and Melissa Turner Lee. When a crippled young lord rescues a girl falling from a tree, it reveals a secret about himself and his mother’s side of the family that could put him at the center of a war with beings he thought only existed in fairy tales. Click here to find out more.

 

 

 

Science Fiction:

A Star Curiously Singing by Kerry Nietz. In the future, Earth is ruled by Sharia law. Follow Sandfly, a debugger and a slave, who goes to a space station to fix a robot for his masters, a robot that has went mad. But little does he know his life is about to change. To read my full review, click here. And to find out more about the book, click here.

 

 

Fairytale Retellings:

Melanie Dickerson has written many great fairytale retellings, minus the magic. In other words, what if the story really happened hundreds of years ago in our world? I love her stories and you will to. You can start with any of them, there is no particular order. So I will point you to the first one she wrote: The Healer’s Apprentice (a retelling of Sleeping Beauty). Click here for my full review and here to find the book. Bonus! All her ebooks are currently on sale on Amazon

 

 

Medieval Mythology:

I wasn’t sure how to categorize these last books until I saw someone else label it as myth. Yes, myth, but more like celtic or some other medieval myth, not Roman or Greek. Anne Elizabeth Stengl writes some amazing stories filled with dragons, princesses, elves, and trolls. Generally, I get tired of the same fantasy trope characters, but Anne breathes fresh air into these stories. They are truly unique and some of my favorites. The first book in her Tales of Goldstone Woods is Heartless. Click here to find out more.

 

 

Just Plain Strange:

Yes, that is the category I would put this book in (all puns intended). Amish Vampires in Space by Kerry Nietz is just that: Amish vampires in space. But less you think this book is a spoof, I personally know Kerry has taken the time to really flesh out the Amish culture and ask what would happen in the future with this group of people? How would they live, what would their lives be like if there was planet colonization and space travel? And the vampire part, more science than horror. Really, you need to check it out. Click here.

 

I wish I had more time and space to list out more of my favorite books, or books on my reading list, but then you would be sitting here reading this blog instead of out searching for your next book. So go forth, my friends, and read!

And please leave a comment and tell me what your latest favorite fantasy or science fiction is

 

Book Release: Secrets Kept

Today is the release day for my friend J.L. Mbewe’s debut fantasy novel, Secrets Kept. As part of her release, I am offering a sneak preview. But before that, here is a quick blurb:

With a curse, she will build an army.

With the dagger, she will undo the last sacrifice.

But first the sorceress must find the secret keeper.

Torn from her homeland and thrust into a betrothal against her wishes, Ayianna learns her family has a deadly secret that now has her on the run. She joins forces with Kael, an embittered half-elf, and Saeed, an elderly High Guardian, to seek answers to her father’s death, the destruction of Dagmar, and the plains people’s bizarre behavior.

Ayianna discovers there is more at stake here than just her mother’s disappearance and her familial duty to her betrothed. The sorceress has cursed the plains people, and it is a race against time to release them before the sorceress resurrects an ancient evil.

 

Betrothals, sorceresses, secrets. Sounds like a great speculative novel! And now for the preview:

 

Leaves rustled, and the bush’s slender limbs shuddered. Shadows veiled the intruder; the light of the lantern unable to penetrate the layers of dry leaves and stems. Ayianna peered closer, and a dark mass burst out of the bush toward her face. She flung her arms up. The milk pail slammed into her head, and its warm contents splashed down her face, neck, and clothes. The lantern rocked on its hinge, the flame flashing and flickering wildly. The intruder screeched and a rush of wings brushed against her skin.

Ayianna lowered her arms. A large bird ruffled its dark feathers and made to settle its wings, but one hung at an odd angle. Its round, ebony eyes ogled her.

Could it be?

“Fero?” she asked. “Is brother home already?” She glanced around, but her eyes failed her in the half-light. Her wet clothes clung to her skin, and the breeze grew colder. She shivered and glared at the bird. “Brother or not, look what you made me do? Now, I’ve got no milk, and I’m all wet.”

Fero jerked his wayward wing back and hissed.

“Are you hurt?” Ayianna lifted the lantern, and its glow poured over the falcon, revealing dark stains on his ribbed underbelly. She reached out to touch him, but he gnashed his curved beak at her. The branch shifted, and the bird thrashed about trying to regain his perch, but then he broke free and soared haphazardly into the red-tinged sky.

Atop the bush, a strip of cloth fluttered where Fero had sat. She tore it free. The fabric was damp, soiled, and stunk of decay. It stained her fingertips red. Blood?

 

J. L. Mbewe is running a giveaway for Secrets Kept. To enter, click on the link: A Rafflecopter Giveaway

To find out more about Secrets Kept, head on over to Amazon and Goodsreads. Or just click on the links below

 

October 16th

J. L. Mbewe: Release Day Kick-Off

The Writer’s Window: Meet the Characters Part 1

Sitting on the Porch with Lynn: Interview

In Darkness, There is Light: Excerpt

October 17th

The Wonderings of One Person: Meet the Villains

Lightly Salted: Guest Post

Aaron DeMott: Excerpt

Writing without Compromise, Clare Davidson: Top Ten favorite YA novels

October 18th

J. L. Mbewe: Top Secret Project Reveal

Anne Elisabeth Stengl: Meet the Characters part 2

Emerald Barnes’ Dreaming Awake Blog: Interview

Pauline Creeden: Dream Cast

Sheila Hollinghead’s Rise, Write, Shine: Review of Dragon Thief

Writing as J. L. Mbewe, Jennette is an author, artist, mother, wife, but not always in that order. Born and raised in Minnesota, she now braves the heat of Texas, but pines for the Northern Lights and the lakes of home every autumn. She loves trying to capture the abstract and make it concrete. She has two short stories published in The Clockwork Dragon anthology, and is busily creating worlds inhabited by all sorts of fantasy creatures and characters, all questing about and discovering true love amid lots of peril. Her debut novel Secrets Kept and her short stories set in the world of Nälu: Desert Rose, Dragon Thief, and Indestructible are now available. She is currently living her second childhood with a wonderful husband and two precious children who don’t seem to mind her eclectic collections of rocks, shells, and books, among other things.

For more information about her journey as a writer mama and all things creative please visit her at http://www.jlmbewe.com/

Connect with Jennette!

Website/Blog

Facebook

Twitter

 Pinterest

Goodsreads

Google+ (But I’m still learning the ropes here!)

Birthdays and Giveaway Winner

I love birthdays, which is kind of funny because I’m not a big celebrations kind of person. But there is something about a birthday: it is one day that is all yours and everyone rejoices with you.

I am now a year older, and I don’t mind. Really. I don’t mind getting older. Every year I have more and more things to be thankful for, to celebrate. I am blessed, even with everything that has happened in my life. And with each year that passes, I draw closer and closer to the day when I finally get to meet Jesus face to face, the one that I love.

So here is to birthdays!

I’m also excited because I just clicked on the winner button for my rafflecopter giveaway. Congratulations, Karen Kahne Shoemaker! You are the winner for the Daughter of Light and Son of Truth giveaway! Whoot!

I will be contacting you today and getting those books sent off into cyberspace!

It’s just wonderful to giveaway gifts on my birthday

For the rest of you, my publisher is running a great deal right now: 25% off almost every Marcher Lord book (including my series). I have personally read almost 1/3 of the titles and slowly making my way through the rest and I can tell you that these are good books. And I’m not saying that because I’m published with MLP. I was reading these books before I was published!

If you are interested, here is the link to get the code.

Thanks, everyone, for the wonderful birthday wishes and for entering my book giveaway

 

Daughter of Light and Son of Truth Book Giveaway

Once again October is upon us, my most favorite month of the year! To celebrate October, every year I feature anything and everything speculative on my blog: books, movies, sites to visit, etc…

To kick off my celebration of October, I am giving away an ebook bundle of my own books: Daughter of Light and Son of Truth, the first two books in the Follower of the Word series. This series follows the life of Rowen, a woman who discovers a mark on her hand, a mark that–when she touches someone–allows her to see inside that person’s soul. If you enjoy Terry Brooks or Terry Goodkind and are looking for a fantasy series that is not YA, then enter and try this one out.

There are many ways to enter: tweet about the giveaway, like my facebook page, leave a comment, etc… Just click on the link to go to the giveaway and start entering. I will randomly choose the winner on October 8th, my birthday to be exact. I thought this would be a great way to celebrate, by giving away books

So what are you waiting for? Click on the link! Rafflecopter Giveaway

And, if that giveaway isn’t enough, you have another chance to win my books, along with every other book my publisher (Marcher Lord Press) has ever published, in celebration of its 5th year anniversary: www.marcherlordpress.com

I refuse to be Bullied

I wrote this post a couple weeks ago, but couldn’t quite hit the publish button. It is hard to share when I feel vulnerable. After I tucked this post away, the topic of cyberbullying started popping up all over, both in my real life and cyber life. I realized I needed to share because people need to know it is okay to say no, to delete that comment, to walk away from that conversation.

I am generally a quiet, patient person. But lately what I have seen on both social media and online games has made me cringe. It would seem people no longer care about their words. They fling them out across cyberspace like darts, hitting anyone that comes by. They belittle, demean, and use sarcasm as a way to get their point across. People are using words as a weapon. And unlike a real weapon, words leave deep wounds that people may never see.

Usually I let people comment on facebook and on my own website. I am open to people disagreeing with me. And the majority of the time the people I interact with know how to disagree in a respectful way. Then one day someone left a comment on a topic I shared on Facebook. I let it sit there. After all, they have the right to disagree with me. But the way they said it was not nice and not at all respectful. Finally, I removed the comment, the first one I have ever removed.  Why? Because this person wasn’t simply disagreeing with me. They were using their words to belittle me. That’s when I said no more. I refuse to be used that way. I refuse to allow someone to tear me down in order to build up their own idea.

I refuse to be bullied.

And I refuse to watch others be bullied.

As a writer, I understand the power of words. One word can shatter a person’s soul. It can lodge inside a person’s heart and mind until the day he or she dies. Yet on the internet we have no problem saying things that I doubt many of us would ever say if we were face to face with that person. Or if we did, we would immediately see the hurt we had inflicted.

I no longer remain silent when I see people ganging up on another person in cyberspace. I carefully choose my words and say something. I stick up for the person being beat over the head with words. Because if I don’t, then who will?

And I will no longer allow comments to remain on my Facebook page or website that tear either myself or other people down. I will not bully others, nor will I participate by remaining quietly on the sidelines.  It stops here, with me.

My friends, do not let other people tear you down. There is a respectful way to disagree with people, and then there is simple bullying to get you to join their side. You can delete the comment. You can leave the conversation. You can close the account. You are not what other people say about you. Let me say that again: You are not what other people say about  you. You are not stupid. You are not a whore. You are not ugly. You are not lazy. You are not a noob.

You are a unique person, created in the image of God who loves you. Your soul matters so much more than your body. You have the potential to change the world simply by allowing God to transform you from the inside out.

You do not need to let other people stomp all over you with their words. You have the power to walk away.

The moment I realized this a couple weeks ago, I found freedom. I was not chained to that comment. And neither are you.

I refuse to be bullied. How about you?

Book Review: If One Falls

If One Falls is a fantasy novel by Elaine H. Baldwin. The story is about two young women who are caught in a war between the Emperor and the Cardinal and Allelon, the exiled true king of Terrah.

Esa is young, beautiful, and selfish. She trains to someday be the bride of a rich man. But little does she know what that life will really entail. Wynn is her companion, a woman of sense and duty, and bearer of a secret: She is part of the Allelon family. When Esa is auctioned off to the highest bidding rich man to become his future wife, the women discover that he killed his previous wives and plans on leaving Wynn (Esa’s companion) at a temple to become a temple prostitute.

So the women run. While running, they stumble upon a community that exists outside Terrah, a community filled with magic. It seems like an idyllic village filled with peace and communion between the inhabitants. Then Wynn discovers that someone in the village has used magic to suppress her and Esa’s memories, replacing them instead with false memories.

I enjoyed If One Falls. It is not the usual medieval fantasy. Instead, the story takes place in a fantasy world that feels more like the 1800′s. I liked how it was a different kind of world. I also enjoyed the characters, especially Wynn. She is a no-nonsense, get things done kind of woman. And she is (most of the time) patient with Esa.

And speaking of Esa, usually characters like her (young, beautiful, naive, selfish) can annoy me, but Esa did not. Instead, I saw her the way Wynn did, as someone who need protection and guidance.

I recommend If One Falls for anyone looking for a fantasy novel

 

Daughter of Light on Tour

This weekend my first novel, Daughter of Light, is on tour with Team Novel Teen! I have enjoyed the tour and met new readers. But I don’t want to hog all the fun. So here are the links to the blogs on tour. Many of them are holding giveaways including ebook and paperbook copies of Daughter of Light. And if you already own a copy, then enter to win one for a friend or family member . So what are you waiting for? Click away!

Jill Williamson

ADD Librarian

Blooming with Books

Colorimetry

CTF Devourer

Katy McCurdy

The Librarian’s Bookshelf

The Ramblings of a Young Author

Shadow Writer World

A Simple Life?!

Who YA Reading?

Worthy2Read