Nelson Lowhim's Blog, page 32

That Smell partN

Will be transferring a novella over to the internets (or maybe as a book, haven't decided yet). I know I promised a collection of all the stories since 1000001 American Nights that were published, some unpublished, but I haven't had the time. I'm sorry and will focus on that in the coming months. Been a minute since I put something out there. This one, first published by Red Rock Review is available as a short story. Not on amazon, though, so enjoy it however you can. 
That being said, things here are well. I'm trying hard not to look at the constant scream of the internets. 
Try. 
This right here being the prime example.
Again, the pandemic certainly played a role, but remember how I pointed out (and many in grassroots movements have been doing the same) how inequality will only continue to make this worse. And it's gotten worse (the pandemic exacerbating the issues from before) with no relief in sight (especially given Manchin and the GOP's stance on helping children etc). 
Unfortunately, this comment thread was followed by a whole host of people crying about China. Suppose the comparison isn't fair, the US is still the anomaly in the world. Compared to other rich countries, it's the worst (especially with GDP, not so much inequality). Completely the worst. 
And, again, it only helps our elites when we start screaming about some other country instead of our own. Read this:

I'm just a volunteer and I'm seeing people dying (or at least dying quicker) due to short-staffing. I had a really horrible experience today on my shift that I wanted to share.

A sobbing woman came up to the desk when I was literally the only one at the nurse's station because everyone was with patients. I was juggling transfers for about four calls at the time so I didn't notice she was upset and crying for a second. 

She asked if she could talk to the charge nurse or a social worker or someone with power to transfer or discharge a patient. Her mother, who is hospitalized for CHF exacerbation at 80ish and otherwise pretty good health for her age (no obesity, diabetes, cancer, etc, just an old lady whose heart is giving out), hasn't had meds or vitals or breakfast or anything done since the daughter had gotten there at 7 am. It was around 11 am when she spoke with me. 

She wanted to pull her out of treatment and sent her to a hospice instead of continuing to suffer on the floor. I did my best and tried to comfort her and got her mom a sandwich at least, but what the fuck else am I supposed to do? 5 nurses and 2 techs between 30ish patients on a stepdown cardiac unit. We've got transport and patient safety people helping with vitals and basic tasks like bedsore turning and helpijg people brush their teeth or go to the bathroom between their actual jobs it was so short-staffed today. I can't actually do anything to help them other than get water and blankets, keep stuff stocked, do charts, and whatever other busywork needs doing. I just wanted to cry with this lady for her mom but there were calls to transferred, patients to get water for, and everything else. The day moves on.

I let the charge nurse know in the hallway and she started tearing up and just went on break in the staff room. I called SW and the woman on the phone sighed and sounded exhausted. I spent the rest of my shift helping our TWO TECHS restock linens and clean out rooms because we're also down janitorial staff. It's been getting worse pretty much my entire time volunteering, but this is as bad as I've seen it. Everyone is one inch from breaking point and there's nothing I can do to help except offer to break down charts or wipe down wheelchairs.

By the time my shift was over, they were rolling this lady out in a wheelchair, presumably to go die at home. There's no way they found her a spot at a hospice that quick around here. They must've really needed the bed because a discharge usually takes all day. I passed them on the way out in the discharge lounge and grabbed the daughter some coffee at the hospital shop. It was all I could do.

Yeah, not good, bob, not good at all. And yet where are the newspaper articles on that? *checks stock market* ok, I guess that's why. 
Profits over people will continue until morale improves. 
Meanwhile we're still dealing with some stupidity regarding COVID. Of course we shouldn't just say "business as usual" but stuff like this:

Just annoys the shit out of me. I mean, are those two population groups at the same risk as each other? All evidence points to no. But online (even Hasan, who I like) you get points for "dunking" on people, even if you're wrong. The stance here is, oh look, hypocrisy! You want them to get covid but not yourself. 
well, no. Nevermind that since the beginning we knew kids were better off than adults or old people, but to act as if you don't know this (and are on the side of a pure "0 covid stance") is beyond dumb. Yet this is what makes the algorithm happy, I suppose. 

Speaking of which, here is an eagle watching one chick eat away at the smaller chick. Reminds me of our algorithms in charge of our thinking (or organizing our thinking). Which only goes to show with great power comes minimal responsibility. 
Have fun out there and stay safe. 
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Anno Corona

Friend of the family mentioned that AD seems a bit old and from another year. I do think that the virus has (well here in the states, not sure about other areas) has taught even I how little I knew about my fellow human. I mean I'm pretty cynical and all, but in April of this year I was sure enough people would be vaccinated that we wouldn't have too many issues a year later. But here we are with plenty of issues. Let's hope that Omicron is as mild as they say it is. 
I should clarify that I assumed the right would be pretty evil with regard to this virus and when they thought it would kill more people in Blue states (and us minorities) then they were all in. I did not expect them all to allow their own people to die because they could get higher ratings. Seems bad. Maybe they understood the payoff of how many would die vs how many would join them with their idea of freedom (or just ignore what they did). 
I mean old people, though they died in higher numbers from this virus still voted just as strongly for Trump. 
I mean there was some level of change, just not as much as I expected. 



That kinda surprised me as I expected some change there. 
Other things did not surprise me all that much. When we saw that Trump can indeed call out people for being anti-vaxx. That he was duly booed then turned on by the likes of Garrison. 

I fully expected his "people" to turn on him if he ever said anything not to their liking. After all, he was only ever a carnival barker who jumped in front of the crazy parade and tested each of the slogans he ended up using. He would say BLM if his crowds cheered him on. Of course they wouldn't, but you get what I'm trying to say, right? That people were shocked and even said "oh look they are turning on him" or   "What he created is turning on him" completely misses that this movement is and means. 
They don't need him. They are driving over the cliff by themselves and when he says anything off key they will turn on him. That's why so much of what he did in 2020 made sense to me [1]
On a side note started a sci-fi drama, raised by wolves, that I really like. Good writing by this writer and, yeah, makes me jealous. 
Hope to have new writing for you this new year (yikes, it's been a long year, though I got an award, not much else was published. Let's hope that changes). 
[1] This doesn't let him off the hook. Like all groups there are some true believers and those would probably go along with his decisions as he has the power. 
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New Year New You, Right?

Or maybe something like try to take the virus as best as you can. 
Because it will affect different things. Flights and so forth. 
I'm hearing fireworks go off. Sporadically. 
About sums up the excitement for another year with the same machines churning us forward towards dumb (though churning money for others).
Here are the cries of systems straining. Machines not making it, though all of our system checks tell us otherwise. 
When the stocks go high and make no sense with regard to on the ground factors, how do we not see the sickness?
Still, I hope you can find joy, find friends and family with whom to enjoy moments that matter. 
Then organize. Whatever complaint you have, find others and organize, convince, repeat. 
And I'll keep on writing as best as I can. More than I can. 
Be safe.
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Enough with the plague

Man, first I want a Cinci win over that Mama Death Star, then maybe 2022 will look better than 2021. In all seriousness, though, given all the idiocy in our foreign policy (our elites just want to keep tensions up with China and Russia, beyond stupid beyond the "let's not play chicken with nukes" there's also the fact that we need international cooperation to deal with things like nukes and Climate Change, but apparently our leaders, and the powers that be here at home, are all frothing at the bit for some kind of war something (to divert from their own stupidity), not to mention that both human nature and the structure of our nation state (most, it would seem) reward this kind of myopic thinking... so where does that leave us?
Definitely in need of some kind of change to the entire system, but how do we get that with so many entrenched and evil powers?
A hard af question to answer, reader, hard af .
That being said, I'm reading a book by a Frenchie called Anomaly , and it's solid (well, much of that remains to be seen, if the Times recommends it, I usually am not a huge fan), but dammit (and Roth's books had these as well) the veteran as some shitty stereo type of anger mixed with the idea of civilian stereotypes of the war and the people who fight it make it... well, just tiring. So much of writing is not writing truth as that boxing conman once said, but a matter of meeting and only slightly expanding some elite's (or with other popular pieces, someone with cash to spend on your work) worldview and never make them too uncomfortable. 
So it goes. 
Let's hope the new year doesn't bring us any new plagues, though the variants could be just as bad. Be safe. 
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More Omicron. Highest cases ever.

What will that mean, in terms of deaths? In terms of the more insidious "long covid" viral side effects of catching it, well I'm thinking this might be the worst part of it all. Sure, we're probably looking at a lower death rate, but with something as infectious as measles, well, this is gonna hit us hard. 
We're already seeing it with flight cancellations (so airplane companies, you know the ones who got billions to make it through Covid, are on bare bone staff, and so just a few people out with Covid sends the system crashing down) and even with the medical world. 



See here, a thread on hospitals in the US on divert. Not good, right?

Anybody else remember sometime last March when hospital admin across the country just mass fired like 50-80% of their nursing staff, hell, cut all staffing to the bone, then turned around and gave themselves bonuses as they worked from home? 

Well well well ...if it isn't the consequences of their own actions. We have beds, just no nurses. And the nurses we do have, I'm not sure most of them can legally vote yet.

Yeah, but there'll be no consequences because will the superrich in this country ever be punished even if they kill a lot of people? 
Still, the thread is worthwhile to let you know what's going on around the country. 

Minneapolis has a mobile morgue hanging out on hospital campus. No inpatient elective totals for the last 13 weeks. 12+ hour waits in ERs

Just great, wonderful..

Of course, that all seems like part of some grift, right? Something that might play into people's hesitancy to group Big Pharma into one idea and so not trust vaxxes because it's from Big Pharma [1]. 

I Houston area, lots of freestanding ERs are discharging people with significant pathology and telling them to go to another ER attached to a hospital because they need to be admitted and can't be turned away.

In the long run, it's usually the best thing for the patient, assuming the patient picks an hospital that has the service they need (which isn't always happening).

But, at that point, the freestanding ER should just be shut down if they don't have the capacity to stabilize these patients until an accepting facility is available.

Enough from me, just go read that thread. 
Another thread showing how omicron is different than delta. And more inside info and thoughts. Not sure what else to say, but it does look like this winter might be pretty bad. Seriously, get vaxxed out there. 




[1] (and also that lawsuit immunity thing, but also lawsuits can be BS because decent vaxxes like the Lyme disease one were sued out of existence when they were legit ones... pointing to another issue with our system). 
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Omicron or B.1.1.529

With an R0 of nearly 10. Remember Covid was bad enough before, but now it's truly in measles levels of you'll get it so don't try not to. Here's the study behind it. As always more data might change this but not looking good. Some saying that this has to be the last wave (basically everyone gets it from here on out), but I'm guessing we haven't seen anything yet (note, that as is, Covid can infect other parts of the body, besides the lungs, like the brain etc). 

The original strain of SARS-CoV-2 has an R0 of 2·5, while the delta variant (B.1.617.2) has an R0 of just under 7. Martin Hibberd, professor of emerging infectious diseases at London School of Hygiene & Tropical Medicine (London, UK), reckons omicron's R0 could be as high as 10.

It does make it more clear how even people in the past might have become numb to diseases that hit like waves of deaths, some worse some not as bad as before. At some point you do just want to continue living as before and that's when the less careful get hit (or some other factor or lifestyle choice, as people didn't actually know what was causing it back then and the virus sure af isn't a moral agent). 
Anyhow, still thinking about the headlines we're seeing all around our corporate media, always right wing to its core. 

Once again you'll see that the ways in which our elites really try to focus your attention on other matters, mostly the evil abroad so that you don't see the evil here at home (them). Note in the above piece how there's a little bit of a note for the Afghan news (evil abroad section) we have the Taliban against women's rights. Fair enough, and certainly an issues, but guess what headline you won't see? 
Yeah, something like this: that we are starving the country with the lives of millions now hanging in the balance. Mass murder that makes just about anything our enemies are doing look like child's play, but you won't hear it for even a second. I mean, remember the cries about the poor afghan people we can't leave behind? Somehow not hearing that any more [1]
Don't worry though, and just scream at the people they tell you to scream at. 

[1] How many of those cries were from courtesans of our media or just signal boosting is another matter and besides the point.
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Best Movies 2021

Random aside to this listicle, but was talking to the FIL about the fact that over the past three years there haven't been any original (so not part of any previous franchise or movie world) movies made in America that were really good. Well, it wasn't some in depth thought. Simply something that was holiday talk amongst the fam, but none of us could think of anything really good. But looking at this list, yeah I suppose I was wrong. Not that I agree with what's on here. But here are some that I can think of that hit the spot: Knives Out... and that's it. yeah, sad isn't it? Yeah, name some more here, but they don't interest me, tbf (I'm talking non-docs, btw). 
As for 2021, well it comes down to basically Dune. No Time to Die was solid. Well damn, not a good year for movies, was it? I can name more TV shows I watched and liked, tbf. Oh, The Burning, a Korean movie , was great, but I think it's from another year. Let's see if I can remember something else. 
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Matrix revisited.

The best love letter to The Matrix ever made. First time watching this movie was the biggest shock to my system ever. Haven't been that surprised by a movie since. Maybe Spider multi verse comes close since I didn't expect a movie like that to be so brilliant. Though I do wonder if I'll like the sequels because of what it says here: it introduces a level of gray into a black and white world. Something I hated when younger and that I now like. 
Been thinking about this latest movie and how the start was so great. Wondering what the movie would have been like if it were simply Neo in the Matrix trying to break through, but being shown how crazy he is, doing a sequel of a video game. That would have bene interesting, but how does that end? With that alone? Or perhaps another way to infect the matrix from within? 
Another way would have been to have something the machines did in improving the world to the point where people don't want to leave the matrix and suicides in the matrix alone are going up. So now the freedom fighters have to think about how many people they can actually save (not many) versus the billions they have to deal with as they might die if exposed to the idea that their life is a lie. So perhaps leaving the people alone, or perhaps even killing them so the machines don't have energy would be the best thing possible.... So genocide? What would they do?
That question would have been the most interesting. 
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Man o man.

Still more useless thoughts on the power of the algorithm that keeps us scrolling and reading the useless. 
But I come to a screen shot of an "egirl" saying one of her twitch subs bought her a PS5 etc and someone mocking the guy who bought her this (assumed, I know) only to be called a twitch sub. 

I got her the ROG edition you casual. 

She’s sending me her urine so I can use it as a coolant in my rig.

There's something about all this that's very very good to read through. Here we have something like the best dialogue (something I've mentioned before, the tone of dialogue on comments is usually much better than most novels, even ones I love) with humor and slight insight into the kinkier aspects of human beings. And whatever my initial puritanical instincts are on hearing that kink, that is part of being human. And that peering into aspects of humanity that many times no novel dives into.

 Well not the literary ones. There are plenty of romance or erotica novels dealing with a myriad of kinks, desires. They contain a lot of honest writing but I wouldn't call it deep writing (again my puritanical side?. Still I don't think it should be as mocked as it is. Anyhow, just thinking about that and writing something more (in terms of fiction). 

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RIP Desmond Tutu

RIP great soul of the previous century, previous generations, but inspiration to all. Crazy as I'm getting older seeing the waves of deaths, outside of the anomalies, come closer and closer. Good read on him, albeit short. 



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