Kurt Brindley's Blog, page 79
March 5, 2016
THE AMERICAN FAMILY IS BROKEN | A Relating to Humans Woman’s Issues Feature
THE AMERICAN FAMILY IS BROKEN
by Erin Byerly
It was your choice to have a baby, so why should my tax dollars pay for them?
Americans pride themselves on rugged individuality and a tireless work ethic. After spending such long hours in the office with so little vacation time, why should we be expected to subsidize the kids we may not even be having? And why should employers bear the brunt of pregnant employees and the inconvenience of maternity leave?
We may be one of the wealthiest nations in the world, but we’ve forgotten who we are. People talk about children as though they were vintage cars, expensive and unnecessary luxuries that shouldn’t inconvenience anyone but their owners.
We pay a lot of lip service to how much we love children, but when it comes down to it, we resent every last dime we collectively spend on them. We don’t want them in our restaurants or in our airplanes, and certainly don’t want the workplace to accommodate their parents.
Not everyone wants, needs, or is able to have children, but putting the entire burden of our species on the backs of individual families has become unreasonable.
Women’s roles have drastically changed since fifty years ago, and for good cause. Women should neither be kept from employment nor forced into economic dependence on men who could abandon them, die, or even become abusive.
Problem is, relative wages have dropped and most families require two incomes, yet Americans seem blind to our changing circumstances. We vilify families living on public assistance while simultaneously viewing workplace pregnancy accommodations, universal healthcare, parental leave, and subsidized daycare as selfish “entitlements.”
And we don’t want to pay for them, unlike every other developed nation on Earth.
No other First-World country fires pregnant women for medical complications or rips new mothers from the arms of their newborn babies within days of delivery. We barely acknowledge the idea that fathers need bonding time too.
No one else in our fighting class expects parents to shoulder low-quality daycare costs that exceed college tuition rates or applauds making children go hungry when their parents can’t afford lunch money.
Nothing in life is free. We’re turning our backs on the most vulnerable members of our species and our nation is paying a heavy price. Our maternal and infant mortality rates are criminal. Poverty and mental illness are reaching levels not seen since the Great Depression.
And with those costs come interest. Our child abuse, violent crime, and incarceration rates dwarf those of our European counterparts. These issues don’t arise from a handful of irresponsible parents, but a skyrocketing number of families who can barely cope with the strain.
You may not want a child and should never feel obligated to have one, but someone needs to.
Once upon a time, you were a child yourself. Not just you, but your coworkers, your boss, your friends, your family members, and anyone else you ever cared about. You grew up, as will most of the children in America today.
So, why should your tax dollars be spent on someone else’s children?
Because they are you.
They are us.
All creative expressions submitted to the Relating to Humans Women’s Issues feature will be profiled on the blog all throughout Women’s History Month.
Filed under: Human Relations Tagged: abortion rights, babies, child abuse, families, family issues, feminism, human relations, maternity leave, mental health issues, Relating to Humans, relationships, Women's History Month, women's issues, writing
March 3, 2016
MARY OF THE SUN | A Relating to Humans Women’s Issues Feature
MARY OF THE SUN
by jonna ellis holston
From Lowell , Massachusetts
My Aunt Mary wrote for The Lowell Sun for seventy-six years. She started while still a high school girl… under pen names… looong before women commonly reported for newspapers. She and my Uncle Charles G Sampas, a mild mannered executive news editor from a great historic city’s newspaper, were my God Parents. Often glued to Mary’s side, I recall The Sun as a chaotic place full of screaming, sweaty reporters desperate to read the ribbons spewed forth from the wire services. I still smell the ink and burnt coffee, and hear the deafening noise of the printing machines. “It’s a lot of work to bring news to the people,” she told me.
And remember those phones that had wires attached to walls? Mary Sampas was attached to one of those… always tucked under an ear, scribbling notes and trading in gossip and fact as she covered the glamorous stars of old Hollywood, Lauren Bacall, Cary Grant, David Niven, many others. Mary and Charlie even accompanied the Kennedys on their Paris trip with Charles de Gaulle and then off to Vienna for the Khrushchev talks. Even Jackie called on Mary for the inside scoop.
She slept late… till the calls began… then the typing would start. Evenings were usually spent socializing with those who were known to be in the know. Hers was a world of endless working parties with artists, writers or prominent Democrats. With non-stop, indefatigable charm and the brain of a word processor she would pursue secrets, discover, verify. What was show and what remained hidden in the backroom smoke?
She brought me to my first ballet when I’d just turned eleven. After the captivating magic and beauty on stage I decided, right there, that I wanted to be a ballerina when I grew up. She asked me if I’d like to see the ballerinas up close. I thought I was the luckiest girl alive as we sauntered behind the curtains with press pass in hand. But I was struck by the naked authenticity of costumes tossed, the smell of sweat, cold cream and wilting rose. This was typical Mary, don’t get lost in this dream, this takes a lifetime of hard work and practice. Search for the story behind the story, find what’s real.
It wasn’t that she set out to expose the chaotic core trapped in the center of every bright star; she just sought truth and didn’t treat children like babies. I don’t think she could have read a fairytale without somehow exposing the dust between pages. Even during the Camelot sparkle of the Kennedy years I knew about the telling fingernails, bitten down to the quick and smartly hidden under Jackie’s gloves.
She loved the famous, the talented, and the informed, filled her life and home with them yet she intellectually cartwheeled over most. The glamorous and entertaining Mary possessed the most astute mind in the room and damn if she didn’t know that it was true. I went to some of those parties full of important people but I, too young to know that this wasn’t normalcy, usually fell asleep in her bed.
Aunt Mary’s last party was her grand finale. Kidney failure and she’d refused treatment. Saints Medical Center gave Her Majesty the largest possible room where she was surrounded by friends, loved ones and family, where fans came to pay their respects to a most beloved woman, toasted the One who had provided a lifetime of the beautiful usage of language. From her hospital bed she wrote her last piece for the paper.
She called to say good bye. I could hear Frank Sinatra music playing faintly behind her. I, unwilling to let go, asked her if she thought dialysis would really be so terribly bad.
“Yes it would,” she said, yet another truth. “They say it won’t hurt but it always does.”
She told me how much she loved me and I, with tears welling, tried to convey to her what she meant to me and what an honor it was to have her in my life. I wanted to be there with her but there was a Nor-eastern blizzard in the forecast. I had a sprained ankle and my car needed breaks.
It was Classic Mary and the last truth she told me before she died. “You know,” she said, “you were always an awful lot of work.” I was, indeed, and smiles still linger on the tears of my memory. On January 12th, 2011, just over 5 years ago and at age 93, the Great Woman passed onward.
*
Whatever we were to each other, that we are still. Call me by the old, familiar name. Speak of me in the easy way which you always did.
Rosamunde Pilcher
January 8th, 2016
*
Dear Auntie Mary,
You know… you could be a lot of work too,
But I would change nothing… because I had you.
Love,
Jonna
PS: You always loved my bad poetry.
jonnaellisholston.com
All creative expressions submitted to the Relating to Humans Women’s Issues feature will be profiled on the blog all throughout Women’s History Month.
Filed under: Human Relations Tagged: family, feminism, gender issues, granddaughters, grandmothers, human relations, maternal relationships, memoirs, Relating to Humans, relationships, remembrances, women pioneers, women's issues, writing
Technological Stones… or Lack Thereof
So about this US Government versus Apple debacle re: unlocking the San Bernardino terrorists’ iPhone…
It’s been confounding me as to the solution for a while now.
It falls into the broad national/global discussion that’s been going on since 9/11 as to what is the proper balance when it comes to Privacy versus Security?
Is there even such a thing?
Or is it more like sailing a ship, where we know exactly where we want to navigate to, yet we continually have to make course corrections to get there…
Big question.
But as far as this phone debacle, I, like the not so fly Super Spy General Hayden, do not believe the government should be allowed a “key to the back door” into all encrypted phones/technology.
However, while listening to the FBI Director testify before Congress re: the debacle, he made a pretty eye-opening, yet pretty basic statement when considering our Constitution and our normal policing practices for entering a citizen’s personal places and spaces…
It’s called a warrant.
The police can get a warrant to access a suspect’s home, car, storage locker, library account, etc….
Why cannot the police get a warrant to access a locked phone?
Filed under: Technology Tagged: Apple, encryption, facebook, FBI, Federal Bureau of Investigation, friendship, IPhone, national security, privacy, privacy versus security, San Bernardino terrorists, social networks, terrorism, US Government
Seeking Submissions Discussing Women’s Issues throughout Women’s History Month
March brings with it Women’s History Month, as well as the launching of our Indigogo campaign to raise the funds that will allow us to produce our short film LEAVE.
And, not coincidentally, both Women’s History Month and our film LEAVE share the goal of highlighting and raising awareness of the many valuable contributions women have made and continue to make to societies all throughout the world.
In my effort to celebrate and support both Women’s History Month and the funding of our short film LEAVE, I am asking you to share your creative efforts here — either as an anecdote, a very short story, a poem, a photograph, or artwork — that seeks to raise awareness of women’s issues…
Because we all know that women’s issues are everyone’s issues.
To augment these Guest Contributions I hope and expect to receive, I will be sharing past submissions from our Relating to Humans Women’s Issues archive.
Even though I haven’t been promoting it lately because I’ve been so involved with other projects, the Relating to Humans feature is still very much a thing here and I encourage you to check it out and consider submitting your work to any/all of the issue features.
All submissions I receive for Women’s History Month will be published on the blog and on the Women’s Issues feature page.
So, if you have something to say that raises the awareness of women’s issues, please consider sharing it here. To submit your work, please follow the Submission Guidelines found on the Relating to Humans page.
And also, please consider supporting us in our efforts to produce LEAVE, a short film that seeks to both entertain and inspire discussion for positive change.
INDIGOGO
This article has been updated to reflect the change in submission guidance. This will allow all articles to go live on the Women’s Issues feature page immediately and will provide links back to the author’s website, versus submitting them through the Contact page and having to wait for me to publish them.
Filed under: Human Relations Tagged: Equal Means Equal, equal pay, feminism, fundraisers, gender equality, independent films, sexual assault, submissions, Title 9, women, Women's History Month, women's issues, writing
March 2, 2016
Did you ever think it would really happen?
You know, I did. I really did.
I had always believed that eventually the US Congress would open up all combat-related assignments to females.
But I didn’t really think it would happen this soon…
And it was never within the realm of my imagination that it and the end of Don’t Ask Don’t Tell could have happened in the matter of one presidency.
Damn… I sure am going to miss President Obama.
G.I. JANE was released in 1997.
Our short film LEAVE is set in 1995, when Congress first opened up some combat-related assignments to females, including assignments to warships, and it is about one warship’s all-male crew’s reaction to the arrival of its first female sailors.
I’m sure you can just imagine exactly what their reaction will be…
Hopefully the brave service women now accepting the first combat and special warfare assignments will receive a much better reaction and reception…
@LEAVEthemovie
facebook.com/leavethemovie
Indigogo Sign-up
Filed under: Human Relations Tagged: combat, diversity, equality, feminism, films, G. I. Jane, gender equality, independent films, military, movies, short films, women's equality, Women's History Month, women's issues
March 1, 2016
THE WOMAN IN ME | A Relating to Humans Woman’s Issues Feature
THE WOMAN IN ME
by Debolina Coomar
When I was a daughter, I had dreams,
I learnt that life is not easy, and nothing is what it seems.
When I became a student, I had aspirations,
I learnt that achievements are important, and learnings are an inspiration.
When I became a professional, I had goals,
I learnt that life is full of challenges, and we have to take up different roles.
When I was a wife, I had a duty,
I learnt caring, sharing and trust in a relationship is the real beauty.
When I became a mother, I had responsibilities,
I learnt to take up challenges and fulfill them with my abilities.
When I wear so many different masks everyday,
Each one is different and unique in its own way.
But, when I see myself in the mirror,
I see so many faces, but I cannot find HER.
The woman in me keeps calling me everyday,
I just avoided her as I almost have nothing to say.
But, one day, she saw me back into my eyes,
And wanted to know why I ignored all her cries.
I forgot HER as I was busy being everything else,
But, now I want to be ME and let myself out,
I want to open my heart and let it shout.
I want to start living as MYSELF and let the world see,
The WOMAN OF SUBSTANCE, because that is the best I have in me.
It is my pleasure and honor to kick-off our March-long celebration of Women’s History Month with such a beautiful and inspiring poem by Debolina Coomar.
Thank you for submitting your poetic creativity to our Woman’s Issues feature page, Debolina, thereby allowing us all to enjoy your words.
And I invite and strongly encourage you to visit the Relating to Humans feature and consider sharing with us some of your creative inspiration.
As was Debolina’s, all submissions meeting the editorial standards of yours truly submitted to the Women’s Issues page throughout the month of March will be published to the blog.
And now is a good time to submit your work to all the features, as I am in the process of archiving all submissions received prior to this year, which means each feature page will be empty and the early submissions will receive top billing, so to speak.
Please visit the Relating to Humans page for the Submission Guidelines.
Additionally, I invite you to click on the poster above to learn about some of the things the US Government, via the Small Business Administration and the National Business Women’s Council has planned to celebrate Woman’s History Month in its efforts to raise awareness of Women and Gender Issues.
And lastly, please don’t forget to show your support for our short film, LEAVE, by visiting and following (and spreading the word about) our facebook page at www.facebook.com/leavethemovie.
Filed under: Human Relations Tagged: equality, feminism, gender issues, human relations, independent films, Indie Authors, poetry, Relating to Humans, short films, submissions, women, Women's History Month, women's issues, writing
CAN I INSPIRE YOU? | A Relating to Humans Woman’s Issues Feature
CAN I INSPIRE YOU?
by Debolina Coomar
When I was a daughter, I had dreams,
I learnt that life is not easy, and nothing is what it seems.
When I became a student, I had aspirations,
I learnt that achievements are important, and learnings are an inspiration.
When I became a professional, I had goals,
I learnt that life is full of challenges, and we have to take up different roles.
When I was a wife, I had a duty,
I learnt caring, sharing and trust in a relationship is the real beauty.
When I became a mother, I had responsibilities,
I learnt to take up challenges and fulfill them with my abilities.
When I wear so many different masks everyday,
Each one is different and unique in its own way.
But, when I see myself in the mirror,
I see so many faces, but I cannot find HER.
The woman in me keeps calling me everyday,
I just avoided her as I almost have nothing to say.
But, one day, she saw me back into my eyes,
And wanted to know why I ignored all her cries.
I forgot HER as I was busy being everything else,
But, now I want to be ME and let myself out,
I want to open my heart and let it shout.
I want to start living as MYSELF and let the world see,
The WOMAN OF SUBSTANCE, because that is the best I have in me.
It is my pleasure and honor to kick-off our March-long celebration of Women’s History Month with such a beautiful and inspiring poem by Debolina Coomar.
Thank you for submitting your poetic creativity to our Woman’s Issues feature page, Debolina, thereby allowing us all to enjoy your words.
And I invite and strongly encourage you to visit the Relating to Humans feature and consider sharing with us some of your creative inspiration.
As was Debolina’s, all submissions meeting the editorial standards of yours truly submitted to the Women’s Issues page throughout the month of March will be published to the blog.
And now is a good time to submit your work to all the features, as I am in the process of archiving all submissions received prior to this year, which means each feature page will be empty and the early submissions will receive top billing, so to speak.
Please visit the Relating to Humans page for the Submission Guidelines.
Additionally, I invite you to click on the poster above to learn about some of the things the US Government, via the Small Business Administration and the National Business Women’s Council has planned to celebrate Woman’s History Month in its efforts to raise awareness of Women and Gender Issues.
And lastly, please don’t forget to show your support for our short film, LEAVE, by visiting and following (and spreading the word about) our facebook page at www.facebook.com/leavethemovie.
Filed under: Human Relations Tagged: equality, feminism, gender issues, human relations, independent films, Indie Authors, poetry, Relating to Humans, short films, submissions, women, Women's History Month, women's issues, writing
February 29, 2016
#OscarsSoWha??
What a night at the Oscars, eh?
Big night for diversity and sexual assault awareness.
While it’s no longer cool for us to say “boys will be boys”… I believe it’s still within the legal PC bounds of good taste to say “Chris will be Chris.”
He did a pretty good job of calling out all the major inequality themes re: Hollywood that’s been on everyone’s minds and tongues for the past few months. Though he did go a little easier on the Establishment and a lot harder on Jada than I expected.
I thought his most pointed call-out wasn’t a race issue but a gender equality issue when discussing the absurdity of having both a Best Actor and a Best Actress category. “It’s not as if they are running a track and field event and Robert De Niro has to say, ‘Whoa, I better slow down my acting so Meryl Streep can catch up…” It’s worth your time to search for and watch Rock’s opening monologue. It should be easy enough to find.
I was pretty bummed when Lady Gaga didn’t win the award for Best Song (or whatever the official nomenclature is) after her highly emotional and powerful performance of “Till It Happens To You.” But when Sam Smith gave his amazing acceptance speech calling on for equality and encouragement for the LGBT community I was like, okay… he’s cool.
But to me, Lady Gaga’s performance was definitely the highlight of the night and one of the most moving performances I’ve seen in a while. At least since her performance of the US National Anthem at the Super Bowl… which was also quite impressive. She’s quite the talent, that’s for sure.
As far as the movie stuff goes, I can’t really comment much because until I see the Oscars I never realize how many movies I haven’t seen throughout the year.
I’m happy and unsurprised that Leo won for Best Actor. Pretty impressive speech he gave re: The Environment. Of course it was a given he would speak about environmental issues knowing how passionate he is about the subject. And it also makes sense to discuss it seeing how critical Nature was to the success of his film. [See: The Revenent: It’s Really Good (for a laugh)]
I’m less happy that Tom Hardy did not win Best Supporting Actor and very surprised that, if Tom didn’t win it, they didn’t just give it to Sly Stallone for sentimental reasons (it certainly wouldn’t be for any acting reasons). As a former Intelligence Community (oxymoron, I know…) guy, I have been meaning to see The Bridge of Spies so I cannot judge the dude who did win. I cannot even judge him based on his past performances because I don’t even have clue who he is (although there is a tinge of familiarity so I’m sure I’ve seen him in this or that).
As for Best Actress… didn’t see “The Room” or is it just “Room,” but just based on the clips shown Brie Larson looks like a worthy winner. As for Best Supporting Actress… didn’t see “The Danish Girl” but Alicia Vikander is definitely the “It Gal” of the moment so I assumed she would win.
While Mad Max swept all the technical and nitnoid whatnot awards, I thought for sure The Revenent would sweep the Big Three. It got two with Alejandro González Iñárritu winning Best Director (two years running now), and Leo’s win, but missed on the biggest of all.
Haven’t seen Spotlight, the winner, yet. I’m still waiting on it to hit Redbox and then I’ll have to wait until Redbox texts me a free movie night before I do. Yeah, I’m cheap like that.
As far as the presenters go… it seems that there is a budding bromance between Russell Crowe and Ryan Gosling. They were quite funny together and could make a pretty good living as a comedic duo.
And did anyone else get confused between Kate Winslet and Patricia Arquette? Did they look like copies of each other because they were sharing the same pair of glasses? Or are they secretly Pond Crossing Twins?
Speaking of Patty Arquette, you should check her out on twitter and see the work she’s doing with the #EqualMeansEqual documentary that is in the works. As you probably know she’s a major, outspoken proponent for Women’s and Gender Equality Issues. She believes because she called out Hollywood last year in its poor record of equality in pay between men and women that she has lost several potential acting gigs from it. Check out the good stuff she has going on at @PattyArquette at the tweet machine.
As typical, Sasha Baron Cohen provided the most cringe-worthy moment. His “Ali G” skit is no longer fun(ny), as it now comes off to me only as being stale and rather desperate.
Still, all in all I thought The Oscars overall was a great show. One of the most entertaining in a long while.
I’m really looking forward to seeing what impact all the awareness to diversity this year will have on next year’s nominees.
Aaand… that’s a wrap.
Filed under: Movies Tagged: actors, Chris Rock, diversity, films, gender equality, Hollywood, movies, Patricia Arquette, race issues, Russel Crowe, Ryan Gosling, sexual assault, The Oscars, women's issues
February 28, 2016
So, about this Snapchat #socialmedia thing…
I wonder…
Are any Indie Authors using it to promote their work?
And if they are, are they finding it worthy of the time and brain cells it took them to learn yet another social media thing for which to suck them away from their writing (not that I need it for an excuse to do that… I have many, many others from which to draw from)?
I am filled with such wonderment for this Snapchat thing from seeing more and more written about its value in marketing to the social media-consumed Millennials.
Filed under: Technology Tagged: authors, book promotions, books, business, Indie Authors, marketing, Millennials, publishing, Snapchat, social media, social media marketing, social networks, technology, writing
March brings with it Women’s History Month, as well as…
…the launching of our Indigogo campaign to raise the funds that will allow us to produce our short film LEAVE.
And, not coincidentally, both Women’s History Month and our film LEAVE share the goal of highlighting and raising awareness of the many valuable contributions women have made and continue to make to societies all throughout the world.
In my effort to celebrate and support both Women’s History Month and the funding of our short film LEAVE, I am asking you to share your creative efforts here — either as an anecdote, a very short story, a poem, a photograph, or artwork — that seeks to raise awareness of women’s issues…
Because we all know that women’s issues are everyone’s issues.
To augment these Guest Contributions I hope and expect to receive, I will be sharing past submissions from our Relating to Humans Women’s Issues archive.
Even though I haven’t been promoting it lately because I’ve been so involved with other projects, the Relating to Humans feature is still very much a thing here and I encourage you to check it out and consider submitting your work to any/all of the issue features.
All submissions I receive for Women’s History Month will be published on the blog and on the Women’s Issues feature page.
So, if you have something to say that raises the awareness of women’s issues, please consider sharing it here. To submit your work, please follow the Submission Guidelines found on the Relating to Humans page.
And also, please consider supporting us in our efforts to produce LEAVE, a short film that seeks to both entertain and inspire discussion for positive change.
INDIGOGO
This article has been updated to reflect the change in submission guidance. This will allow all articles to go live on the Women’s Issues feature page immediately and will provide links back to the author’s website, versus submitting them through the Contact page and having to wait for me to publish them.
Filed under: Human Relations Tagged: equal pay, feminism, fundraisers, gender equality, independent films, movies, sexual assault, short films, submissions, Title 9, women, Women's History Month, women's issues
